aetherceuse

[aetherceuse]

I'm retiring from Tumblr indie RP.

A few months ago over on @/chounaifu, I made a post stating that I was taking a hiatus from my Pokémon blogs, and that I wasn't sure whether or not I'll be returning to the community.

After spending that time away, I've come to the conclusion that I am done with Tumblr indie RP as a whole.

I've been in the Tumblr indie scene on and off since 2012, and in the Pokémon rpc on and off since 2016. I'm at a point where I've recognized that this environment isn't healthy for me.

When I sit down in a group environment for any hobby, I want to be able to focus on-- well-- doing that hobby. I can't do that here. The majority of my focus goes into trying to keep track of who has who blocked, so that I don't unintentionally bring two muns who hate each other into the same rp plot. Next to that, I feel a lot of stress and anxiety when I'm on the dashboard, because I feel a lot of pressure to constantly send and answer asks memes, reblog promos, participate in dash commentary, and reply as quickly as I can before a topic or theme is no longer relevant. That just isn't compatible with the energy level that I have these days. I feel genuinely guilty when I can't engage with everyone. I feel like I have this unspoken responsibility to be as active as possible, to interact with every post, otherwise people are going to assume that I hate them for not sending a meme. And while I know that isn't the case with everybody, I've had that experience more times than I can count, and I'm just worn out.

It's difficult for me to be able to write stories and engage with people when so much of my limited energy is put into these things. As a result, it then leads me towards not wanting to write at all.

On top of this, I'm really gutted to know that various people are too anxious to write the same muse as me, because of dupe anxiety. I already worry about taking up too much space in life in general. I don't want to hold my breath about that. I don't want my presence to make someone so anxious that they block me. It's not a good feeling.

I don't know guys. I've been writing in a different environment for a while now, and it's better for my mental health. I'm not going to yap about it here, because truth be told, the few times I have on Bluesky and Discord were met with a lot of negativity. I don't take things like that personally, but I don't have the capacity for much more of it right now. Not with how stressful everything else is.

Idk.

Life is finite, and I want to spend it doing things that make me happy. This doesn't make me happy. Community discourse doesn't make me happy. Thinking about the amount of time I've spent in the past, sitting in chat rooms, listening to and engaging in conversations related to Tumblr rp drama just makes me sad. It makes me really sad. I don't want to do that anymore. I don't want to feel that anymore.

Maybe I'm just not a good match for spaces like this. CPTSD is a difficult condition to live with. When I'm triggered, it can make me stressed and physically ill. And right now, I don't feel like I can navigate the indie rp environment without exposing myself to behaviors and habits that trigger me. So, I'm bowing out.

I'm open to writing on Discord with people. I know that isn't the preferred format for everyone. But I need to do what's good for me, and put myself first.

There's still a lot of good memories associated to the indie rp community for me, though. I've made friends that I want to keep for life. I laughed, I joked around, we had some epic rp moments, I only wish I could have more of that, and that the community was more open to dash events, group plots, and healthy, honest communication. But, I understand that communication is difficult. Not everybody gets along. Things function the way they do here, and, it's not my place to change it.

If you want to add me on Discord to stay in touch, I'm at 000missingno. <- Don't forget the period. Otherwise, I'm on to the next adventure.

Sorry for slow Discord responses. Life is hard and I'm tired.

I have so much love for many of you guys. Please do things that make you happy.

- Rex

[aetherceuse]

I'm retiring from Tumblr indie RP.

A few months ago over on @/chounaifu, I made a post stating that I was taking a hiatus from my Pokémon blogs, and that I wasn't sure whether or not I'll be returning to the community.

After spending that time away, I've come to the conclusion that I am done with Tumblr indie RP as a whole.

I've been in the Tumblr indie scene on and off since 2012, and in the Pokémon rpc on and off since 2016. I'm at a point where I've recognized that this environment isn't healthy for me.

When I sit down in a group environment for any hobby, I want to be able to focus on-- well-- doing that hobby. I can't do that here. The majority of my focus goes into trying to keep track of who has who blocked, so that I don't unintentionally bring two muns who hate each other into the same rp plot. Next to that, I feel a lot of stress and anxiety when I'm on the dashboard, because I feel a lot of pressure to constantly send and answer asks memes, reblog promos, participate in dash commentary, and reply as quickly as I can before a topic or theme is no longer relevant. That just isn't compatible with the energy level that I have these days. I feel genuinely guilty when I can't engage with everyone. I feel like I have this unspoken responsibility to be as active as possible, to interact with every post, otherwise people are going to assume that I hate them for not sending a meme. And while I know that isn't the case with everybody, I've had that experience more times than I can count, and I'm just worn out.

It's difficult for me to be able to write stories and engage with people when so much of my limited energy is put into these things. As a result, it then leads me towards not wanting to write at all.

On top of this, I'm really gutted to know that various people are too anxious to write the same muse as me, because of dupe anxiety. I already worry about taking up too much space in life in general. I don't want to hold my breath about that. I don't want my presence to make someone so anxious that they block me. It's not a good feeling.

I don't know guys. I've been writing in a different environment for a while now, and it's better for my mental health. I'm not going to yap about it here, because truth be told, the few times I have on Bluesky and Discord were met with a lot of negativity. I don't take things like that personally, but I don't have the capacity for much more of it right now. Not with how stressful everything else is.

Idk.

Life is finite, and I want to spend it doing things that make me happy. This doesn't make me happy. Community discourse doesn't make me happy. Thinking about the amount of time I've spent in the past, sitting in chat rooms, listening to and engaging in conversations related to Tumblr rp drama just makes me sad. It makes me really sad. I don't want to do that anymore. I don't want to feel that anymore.

Maybe I'm just not a good match for spaces like this. CPTSD is a difficult condition to live with. When I'm triggered, it can make me stressed and physically ill. And right now, I don't feel like I can navigate the indie rp environment without exposing myself to behaviors and habits that trigger me. So, I'm bowing out.

I'm open to writing on Discord with people. I know that isn't the preferred format for everyone. But I need to do what's good for me, and put myself first.

There's still a lot of good memories associated to the indie rp community for me, though. I've made friends that I want to keep for life. I laughed, I joked around, we had some epic rp moments, I only wish I could have more of that, and that the community was more open to dash events, group plots, and healthy, honest communication. But, I understand that communication is difficult. Not everybody gets along. Things function the way they do here, and, it's not my place to change it.

If you want to add me on Discord to stay in touch, I'm at 000missingno. <- Don't forget the period. Otherwise, I'm on to the next adventure.

Sorry for slow Discord responses. Life is hard and I'm tired.

I have so much love for many of you guys. Please do things that make you happy.

- Rex

[aetherceuse]

FUN ASK!!! If you were forced to play as your least favorite character in the fandom, who would they be? How would you play them?

That, my friend, would have to be:

These motherfuckers.

I don't even know how I would write them because my disdain for Sordward and Shielbert is so powerful that it could cleave the moon in half.

Think of the two most infuriating British men. Hold those images and just paste these two onto those personalities. That's honestly what I would do.

[aetherceuse]

*Somehow from somewhere a Mario plush doll is thrown in her direction*

" When I tell you these Gen Z little twerps don't have anything better to do--

I SEE YOU-- "

Thud. Mario to the face.

" I do not even care anymore. "

[aetherceuse]

" I am freezing. Turn it off. "

There is frost accumulating on her face. This is awful. This is a tropical island Ree, end this nonsense.

they look outside, where the rain has turned to snow.

they look at their iron bundle.

their iron bundle smiles back, little digital face emoting.

they look back outside, and then back to their paradox pokemon.

“Dude, we talked about this.”

[aetherceuse]

You know how when it's cold as shit outside, and then you step inside and your glasses fog up?

Vice versa in the summer time when it's hot as fuck and you step outside from the AC.

Yknow how Lusamine is made of glass???

Funny mental image.

[aetherceuse]

Back to sleep she goes.

Squinting, pissed off about the cold weather.

[aetherceuse]

Squinting, pissed off about the cold weather.

[aetherceuse]

     – Show me your「 Truth 」 / 「 Ideals 」 !

[aetherceuse]

@intriguant them.

[aetherceuse]

She places a bundle of cloth on the table between them, carefully unfolding it to unveil a black obsidian knife, skillfully knapped and sharper than steel. It's handle is Mightyena bone, bound to the blade with Camerupt sinew.

"I heard you liked beautiful things. Made it myself from a chunk of rock I found near Mt. Chimney."

The weapon is unfolded and put on display like a precious infant that had been swaddled ever so carefully. Rather than a cooing babe with flush cheeks, a sharp, imposing obsidian edge is revealed, soaking up the light surrounding it. Lusamine looks it over, listening to May's explanation of the blade's creation, taking note of every word that is spoken.

" Volcanic glass is incredibly sharp, " she reaches and picks up the knife by its handle, analyzing the craftsmanship.

" And difficult to work with, I presume. There are risks that come with handling dangerous materials. It makes for a remarkable piece though. Obsidian has the tendency to shatter at the incorrect angle, but when used correctly, it cuts beautifully. Excellent work. You are talented. "

[aetherceuse]

A belated Christmas card! Vintage! Circa 1890s

+ 1 Friendship

This is terrible charming, and she will very much enjoy having this on her desk. Well done, Professor.

[aetherceuse]

(pretend this is from @planespc shh im v sleepy)

"Madame President."

Nelson waits to be buzzed in, (made an appointment after all, at the earliest convenience) punctual as ever for her birthday.

"It has been lovely working with you."

Sincere, but quick. To the point.

"I wanted to thank you for the opportunities that have arisen thanks to you and your generosity. The greenhouse has been flourishing, and Registeel is extremely happy. Despite the caustic conditions, it has not rusted since it came to the Foundation. I attribute my ability to achieve that partly to you, of course. I could not have reached this on my own."

The Aether employee pauses.

"I doubt there is much I could offer you that you cannot get yourself, however I have been tinkering, and my Victreebel and Vileplume have been very helpful in my pet projects.

The employee lays on her desk a shiny silver suitcase-- purely decorative-- but inside? Oh, inside are ten tiny little vials, a lovely shade of bright blue-teal. Colorful, unassuming-- and extremely deadly.

"Quite fun. Toxicology simply returns that of normal painkillers, funny enough. Nerve poison have always been fun, of course. I figure you would appreciate both the gesture, and the leap forward in the R&D of it all."

A smile.

"Happy Birthday, Madame President. Here's to another lovely year at the Foundation."

Oh?

" Highly unusual for you to emerge from your greenhouse without a request. "

Nelson. He was one the most efficient ones, toiling away in the loamy soil and tending to the flora. Whenever he made an appearance, it was sure to appeal to her curiosities.

The pleasantries are accepted, though not much is given in return. Compliments. Praise. These are all social expectations. If it were anybody else peaking to her like this, Lusamine would brush it off as a banal attempt at appealing to her good graces. The higher up employees of the Aether Foundation knew better than to do that. These were authentic words coming from her admin.

" I appreciate your words. Your work ethic reflects your value. Therefor I give to you what you deserve in return, " Lusamine remarks, watching as the suitcase is placed on her desk.

Fascination flashes in those stoic eyes for a moment, the ice melting away, replaced with sharp focus.

" I see. . . "

Her lips curl into a brief smile as she takes one of the vials between two fingers, turning it back and forth, admiring the vibrant color. It's reminiscent of the deep sea that her beloved Nihilego thrived in. Perhaps it would be just as potent.

" Thank you. Testing this will be beneficial to our research on neurotoxins. I am curious to see how it stands against terrestrial poisons, and the ones extracted from our cosmic subjects. You are dismissed. "

[aetherceuse]

While I'm on the string of thought:

The way she interacts with her environment is meticulous. Everything is potential data to her. Understanding her surroundings and its inhabitants gives her a great deal of enrichment. You're interacting with someone who was raised to analyze, understand and explain. Her responses are going to be mechanical and concise, and pretty detached. It's not a lack of interest-- actually, it's the exact opposite. If she's sharing data with you, it's because she believes that you're capable of understanding, which is a pretty big compliment from a woman who looks at people in such a lowly, negative light. It's all of the interest. She does have a desire to share her thoughts and observations. Ultimately, Lusamine is an alien entity in this world, and even though she struggles, and will ALWAYS struggle to make connections, this is how she makes her attempts.

[aetherceuse]

Need people to understand that Lusamine's lack of emotional expression means that: if she's sharing her space with you and isn't talking to you like an employee, that means she tolerates you. That's about as much as you're going to get. If you get her to smile for 0.005 seconds, congratulations, she likes you.

If she responds to your messages off the clock? Go play the lottery because you're a lucky as hell person.

[aetherceuse]

You receive a card. Well, more of a document that reads:

FORMAL ACKNOWLEDGEMENT OF ANNUAL CONFIRMATION OF BIRTH. GHETSIS HARMONIA and TEAM PLASMA (henceforth referred to as PLASMA & CO.) hereby officially recognize this date, JANUARY 1st, as the date of annual confirmation of birth for LUSAMINE DELACROIX. The aforementioned party is entitled to all ceremony, gifts and/or compensation commonly given in formal acknowledgement of the anniversary of a birth. PLASMA & CO. are not liable for any loss, damages or dissatisfaction suffered by any relevant party in conjunction with the event.

You're welcome.

@ghetsis

It matched the no nonsense, professional presentation of her own birthday acknowledgment that she had given Ghetsis several weeks ago. Lusamine was not vain about her birthday, nor did she make a fuss about it. The day came and went, marking an unofficial anniversary of her arrival to this world.

However, the manner in which this document is worded-- is amusing. She snorts to herself under her breathe, the brief chuckle hanging there for a moment.

Perhaps she will have her lawyers hold on to this one. It was even notarized.

She will have to send her colleague a 'thank you' acknowledgment.

[aetherceuse]

I got the complete version of my Lusamine commission from @thehungreecat back and I am sooo happy, she is so beautiful! And the artist did amazing! ❤️

Highly recommend!