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Wielding the sword of the proletariat, Comrade Jepsen cuts to the feeling of the bourgeoise and stands as a stalwart shield against reactionaries and imperialists worldwide

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So my therapist said something awhile back and it’s really stuck with me.

I was talking about the stupid things I had done in high school.  How the stories I wrote were stupid and how all I ever wanted to draw was anime shit (which was stupid) and how immature I could be, etc etc etc.

and she was like “Why are you so determined to beat up on Little Maggie?”

It took me off guard, I was like “what do you mean?”

“Why do you keep saying Little Maggie is stupid?  You say she was stupid and immature but wasn’t she just a teenager?  Do you not like who you were as a teenager?”

I shrugged and was like “I think teenage me was very creative and was probably just having fun and being a teenager…”

“So why beat up on her and call her stupid and embarrassing?”

“I dunno, because I guess now I’ve learned a lot.”

“But she was young.  She didn’t know.  I’m just telling you this because if you keep beating up on Little Maggie, you have to remember that she grows up to be you.  When you put bruises and scars on Little Maggie, you’re leaving all the healing for Big Maggie.  Your insecurity about who you were as a child is going to come through into your adulthood.  Be nice to Little Maggie.”

And I’d never really thought of that before?  It seems status quo to just… hate who you used to be for not knowing enough, but that’s totally illogical.  Of course a younger version of you doesn’t know what you know and can’t act with the wisdom that you act.

And even if Little Maggie was writing silly stories about her friends while ripping off anime and drawing her own “manga” and being immature and goofy, she was having fun, she was being creative, she was enjoying the things she liked and she wasn’t hurting anyone.

She’s part of my past and hating her is hating the foundation of who I eventually became.

Just food for thought.

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You may require a little scordatura.

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Two fair men lie in water warm and slow,

As brothers are they joinēd heart to heart;

But Cupid hath not struck them with his bow;

Lest that be thought, they sit five feet apart.

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Wow, a female gamer?  And you smoke?!

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if you tip your pizza delivery driver $10 or more they’ll remember your house and offer you protection from mirror world delivery drivers (shadow pizza hut, evil dominos, little caesers)

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*crushes my emotions with my bare hands* as I was saying,

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Made a little girl cry today.

I was manning a booth while dressed as a witch, and an elementary schooler asked me for a potion that would turn her big brother into a frog. I agreed, and spent five minutes preparing a concoction of vinegar, baking soda, food coloring, soap, and glitter, all according to her specifications. I had her stir it, and then when it was ready, I procured a little glass pebble, dipped it into the potion, and told her to place it under her brother’s bed to turn him into a frog by morning.

When I held it out to her, she started bawling, and explained that she didn’t really want her brother to turn into a frog, she loved him, and she didn’t want my magic after all. 

“That’s okay,” I said. “This just means you’re a good sister.”

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Best birthday photo

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Feels bad chatbot

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In The Departed (2006), Matt Damon and Mark Wahlberg play two different characters— a subtle nod to them being two different actors, despite my wife being unable to tell them apart on the first viewing of the movie.

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some thoughts are so private that you only share them with a therapist or 17,000 people on the internet

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You are angry about something. “Clam down,” I text you. You assume I have made a typo, but in fact I am holding a small soldier clam in my hands. He died so young. War is hell