ahead-fullofghosts

[ahead-fullofghosts]

[talking to myself] no, WE have identity issues

[ahead-fullofghosts]

i need to soapbox about DID more, because its kinda like being trans, you'd think that you'd notice if you had it but that's just cultural osmosis giving a skewed impression, statistically you probably wouldn't. statistically you need to do rigorous work to notice.

[ahead-fullofghosts]

Microdosing polyamory by dating a system

[ahead-fullofghosts]

trying to learn how to process sex as a system is weird. like obviously i've been a system the whole time but idk it's just kinda hard. feeling many kinda ways about it.

[ahead-fullofghosts]

when old trauma is gonna get rehashed it's time to spin the wheel to see who's gonna front to deal with it

system error system error panik panik switch and panik

[ahead-fullofghosts]

[talking to myself] no, WE have identity issues

[ahead-fullofghosts]

system error system error panik panik switch and panik

[ahead-fullofghosts]

weird conflicting emotions of like well i don't want anyone to notice me being a system bc it opens me up to stigma and abuse. ..... but also i want to know if people see any signs bc of validation and general constant confusion over how we're perceived by other people.

[ahead-fullofghosts]

apparently someone in Edinburgh has been updating the street signs for pride

[ahead-fullofghosts]

imagine how cool it would be if plurality had the visual effects it's dramatized to have in fiction. like if your body's eye colors would change as you came on and off of front. that would be wicked

[ahead-fullofghosts]

part two

co-fronting babysitting adventures

[ahead-fullofghosts]

ARGH REBLOGGING TO THE WRONG BLOG IF YOU SEE ANYTHIHG NO YOU DIDNT

[ahead-fullofghosts]

co-fronting babysitting adventures

[ahead-fullofghosts]

there’s nothing wrong with me plus i don’t have any wants or needs plus i don’t feel or think at all

[ahead-fullofghosts]

really feeling the "six hundred strike" trauma mood tonight

look what you turned me into,

look what we've become.

all of the pain that i've been through,

haven't i suffered enough?

you didn't stop when i begged you.

told me to close my heart,

you said the world was dark.

mentally stabbing my trauma with poseidon's giant trident, you know how it is

[ahead-fullofghosts]

9, 12 and 15 for the ask game

9. How easily do you split?

not that easily i think??? like ignoring the kinda floaty fragments we've not finished investigating in therapy, we haven't had a new split since late 2019??? and most of our alters have formed around Very Specific Trauma happening which is kinda interesting, brain wise

12. For systems with other disorders: how do they affect your DID and vise versa?

screams at my adhd did combo. pls... i want to remember things.... also fucking chronic pain and did. fawn is really good at fronting and ignoring the pain and pushing through it which is great and helpful at times but then she will switch out and suddenly all the pain flare up comes crashing in and it's awful

15. What would make a bright future?

hmmm. continuing to work on functional multiplicity, i guess. i never thought i would get to this point at all so it's still weird thinking of the future. i would like to be able to talk about being a system more tho, i wish i didn't feel so embarrassed and anxious about people knowing.

[ahead-fullofghosts]

DID System Ask List

Feel free to reblog and have people send in questions!

These questions are meant for whoever is currently fronting

The systems reblogging this reserve the right to not answer a question they don't want to

Least favorite thing about having DID, and a silver lining?

Headmate you're closest with, if anyone?

Favorite song right now, and favorite quote from it if it's lyrical?

Favored aesthetic

For fictives: are you like your source? how do you feel about this?

how are you working towards healing, in whatever way that means for you right now?

Any special relationships within the system?

Staple fronters lately? (fronters who are very important right now or front a lot)

How easily do you split?

What are your positive triggers to get you to front?

Are your DMs open for other systems, and what are your boundaries? (18+, sfw, etc)

For systems with other disorders: how do they affect your DID and vise versa?

How open are you about your plurality?

What's something you're grateful for right now?

What would make a bright future?