ajgomendes

[ajgomendes]

oh god

[ajgomendes]

JALSKAKSJWKAJ

It’s weird how everyone hating you when you’re nine years old still affects your self esteem when you’re 26 like yeah nobody came to my birthday party but that was like 17 years ago why is it stopping me from going to a gay bar

[ajgomendes]

this is making me cackle

[ajgomendes]

[ajgomendes]

:)

[ajgomendes]

with time everything gets withered away

[ajgomendes]

leaving

[ajgomendes]

only some understand this

[ajgomendes]

[ajgomendes]

i liked this

[ajgomendes]

maybe it is all my fault, maybe i shouldn’t have sat with those kids and shared my lunch, maybe me opening up about my opinion about someone else is backbitching maybe i am this bad person that always comes out around people

[ajgomendes]

i wanna catch fireflies too

[ajgomendes]

i’m so grateful for everything that has happened to me.

yes by that i mean all the good and the bad stuff.

growing up i’ve always been victimizing myself (which isn’t a bad thing. if you grieve you heal) and i’ve always carried the “i’ve been wronged and i could’ve had so much better” energy up until my early teen years. but the more i’m growing up the more i’m realizing i’m being constantly blessed by higher powers for all the things that were wrong that i had to go through

i don’t correct people when they say “life is unfair”, it surely is. nobody ever gets whatever they have wanted, but not because life is cruel, it’s because life is unpredictable

as kids we wanted rainbow hair and 1000 bears and we thought that these things will be the pinnacle of our happiness, but now we know that happiness only depends on our perspective, so no, life wasn’t cruel to me because i didn’t have good loving parents growing up. unfair, sure, but not cruel, because i haven’t been where i am right now if it wasn’t the way it is, we often forget that god is with us at every single step we take until the day we die and we curse him out and cry about everything that happened to us, and god still forgives us.

once you learn to take all of your hurt and worries and give it to the almighty and believe in the future and have faith, eveything starts to work out.

i am so grateful for all the “failures” i’ve had to go through to get to the point where i know what to do at each step of a hard task i have to achieve.

i am so grateful for all the times my relationships with friends and families failed because it taught me what i deserve in a connection and how to communicate with people without hurting their feelings.

i am so grateful for all the days i didn’t try my best and stayed rotting on the bed because now i have done it so many times that the general knowing that this dosent help anything motivates me to get up now.

i am grateful for everything that has happened to me.

i know this is a sensitive topic because a lot of us have been unfaired and gone through things we didn’t deserve. and it can be very damaging to say “everything happens for a reason” to a kid who got neglected by his sisters all his life or to a girl who was touched in a bad way by a senier boy in the bus back to home.

you cannot really say “this is a disguised blessing” to a mother who got dumped and have to work 3 jobs to support her kids

you don’t have to preach this to anyone as all of us are in this journey in our own way, let people be sad let people grieve and complain let people feel the sorrow, they will get up when their clouds have stormed enough that it’s time for a rainbow to shine.

i hope today is a good day for you.

[ajgomendes]

id peel oranges for him

[ajgomendes]

Hey I am Aj. And I like a lot of things, you’ll get to know