akumeis

[akumeis]

can happy confirm i'm back to rping in game && jesus, have i missed rping aym so. uh. maybe sooooon. :3c

HELLO GAMERS. i've got my pc && internet set up in my new place.......... i can finally start getting back into rping. edit; WHAT DO YOU MEAN IT'S BEEN FOUR YEARS........ TIME IS FAKE WHAT THE FUCK

[akumeis]

OUT OF MY WAY, GAY BOYS, I'M OFF TO FUCK THAT GIANT LIZARD

[akumeis]

HELLO GAMERS. i've got my pc && internet set up in my new place.......... i can finally start getting back into rping. edit; WHAT DO YOU MEAN IT'S BEEN FOUR YEARS........ TIME IS FAKE WHAT THE FUCK

[akumeis]

Good for him

[akumeis]

so hopefully one day i'll be back. it's been a rough past few years for me irl but slowly, things are getting better. i won't go into it, at least not publically. idk, it's been a LOT.

one thing i can say is that in the next few months, i'll finally be getting my own place, which will see my mental health improve by an insane amount. once my internet's set up and whatnot, i plan to truly get back into xiv. replay the entire game start to finish again. fall back in love with something that sadly, ended up pretty ruined for me.

i want to get back into writing, as aym or any other character. i want the old, happier me back. the one that wasn't terrified of people, in bed all day, never really eating or sleeping or in any way living. looking back on how i've been online and offline, as understandable as it all may be, has been awful. embarrassing. it's been quite strange finally realising what was actually going on and why.

also, to those who are sorta aware of what happened, kindly don't go after anyone involved. i just hope they get better and break their cycles of abuse and i... really question what difference any "revenge" would make. all i know is it wouldn't bring me any comfort or healing. i don't forgive them for what's happened but at the same time, i wish them nothing but a better future and wish their pasts had been so very different. it's an all-round sad situation. this isn't what life should be.

[akumeis]

                      ♚ ━━ ind. priv. hc prevalent. 𝐀𝐘𝐌𝐄𝐑𝐈𝐂 𝐃𝐄 𝐁𝐎𝐑𝐄𝐋                           of 𝐅𝐈𝐍𝐀𝐋 𝐅𝐀𝐍𝐓𝐀𝐒𝐘 𝐗𝐈𝐕, as cherished by ( reiga ) .                                                               ↳ promo template !

[akumeis]

just thinking about aym being heartbroken post calamity bc nothing can rly grow in ishgard anymore....... he still has his indoor plants but seeing his garden bare makes him rly sad....... so sb introduces him to artificial plants && he loses his fucking mind.

[akumeis]

Is your post saying that aym couldn't be mentally ill or neurodivergent or that people have TOLD he can't be?

my aym is mentally ill && neurodivergent, which people have told me he " can't be " or these hcs mean he's ooc or being " ruined ".

sorry, the post && its tags ended up being really confusing, both because of my wording && tumblr messing up the order they were meant to be in. ; o ;

[akumeis]

aymeric brainwyrms…

[akumeis]

just a quick psa to support your mutuals !  engage with their edits ,  send them memes ,  reblog their promos ,  send them some positivity .  30 seconds out of your day will likely make theirs ,  so please at least try to do the small things to make this community a nicer place to be in !

[akumeis]

I’m sorry all I ever doodle is these two being cuddly 

jk I’m not sorry

[akumeis]

Cuddle pile

[akumeis]

Haurchefant Greystone.

[akumeis]

gives her a slow, somewhat loose hug from behind. even without words, without being able to see his visage, bittersweet combination of concern && relief obvious nonetheless. seeing her back again /alive/... every time, it was treated like it could be the last. && no greater pain was there ━ for both souls ━ for adoration for && adoration from to go unexpressed.... unknown.

        there are places she considers home; there are people. 

        ever has she found herself welcome at aymeric’s manor, a favored chair claimed by a fireplace often warm and crackling, curling up with books, taking her respite as needed. the home her parents own isn’t far away -- yet she feels more welcome here than she does there. her mother’s political ambitions leave such a sour taste within the hero’s mouth yet she does not dare speak of them. aymeric might understand those, however. ishgardian politics are, sometimes, absolutely cutthroat. but no, she won’t burden him with them. yet it is here she turns to sometimes when she needs to return to the chill lands, to settle and sit for a time with someone who yearns to travel with her.

        xel wishes, so much, to take him along. she brings him stories of the lands she has strode through, tales of another world, and watches his eyes light up with wonder. she smiles at him, grief shadowing those dark pools, the corners of her mouth, yet still his delight is a comfort all its own, soothing and gentle to the way her heart aches behind that cage of bone. it has grown easier to bear as of late, yet she still touches that crystal of golden-orange shade constantly where it sits within a pocket, held close. maybe she’ll speak of this too -- but not right now. she wants to tell him the stories. she wants to give him the experiences she has for herself.

        yet it is easy to linger for a time here in this place, a room to herself, her company at his table, sharing laughter and letting him ask questions. she’s a guest and she is allowed reign in the kitchen sometimes. but this morning, how those eyes were darker, lashes crusted with tears shed in her slumber. how can she miss someone so deeply when she understood the pain behind pools of gold? a question she could never find an answer to would ever linger upon her tongue. but he was gone now.

did you hate me for what i did?

        she had come back this time with grief anew in her stare and had seen him noticing. so it was when that hug gently wrapped around her, she leaned back against him as she breathed out quietly, head tilting back enough to peer up towards his face before she was turning and reaching up, setting her hand gently to his cheek. she could ever feel that concern of his, that relief. how dear he was to her, that faith in her strength tempered by a fear of losing her. whatever he said, though, she watched his eyes. xel was always watching eyes; eyes could convey so much. but her mouth curved upwards into that smile she wore to reassure him. a smile seldom gone from her lips since that dreadful day.

        they had shared grief together, broken bread together -- and she refused to fail him again. never again. but how her gaze lingered on his face, seeing the emotions writ large. oh -- he did make her wish to protect him in kind. one day she would keep her promises to him. one day she would smuggle him out of ishgard and they could go off together with a note to lucia. she would make aymeric happy, have him at her side. she would show him all the wonders she could, the far east and the north, take him to all the places she had come to adore in her own right. she would share with him her favorite locales and foods. one day, she swore to herself, they would do this.

        ❝ i’m alright, aymeric, ❞ she murmured gently to him. ❝ just some bad dreams. ❞

        would her knight believe her? maybe so. but that quiet devotion of his ever warmed her heart, leaving xel wanting to kiss his cheek. how affectionate she was for this stalwart knight, seeking to comfort him even if he wanted to return the favor. she never enjoyed seeing those she loved in pain. how warm that hand that pressed to his face, her eyes meeting those depths of blue without hesitation. she understood his worries. but so too would she refuse to fail him once more. she’d done so once already. never again. she knew how much he wanted to lift his shield in her defense. her knight indeed, the noble heart he held within burning hot. oh, she did love this man deeply.

        ❝ would you care for some tea? i promise i brought you a good one this time. ❞

[akumeis]

⌜♚⌟   𝐄𝐋𝐎𝐔𝐀𝐍.     ┊        shieldbcund​.

The circlet remained fixed on his head like the halo it’s meant to be. Rather than an angel guiding those to shelter, he’s one of the souls being shepherded instead. Elouan didn’t want to be the source of concern; never did, at that. He searched Aymeric’s features with a trickle of worry, fear, of what awaited. A scolding, perhaps? A tongue-lashing reserved for children or ill-suited knights? Whatever it was, it never came.

Aymeric offered shelter instead.

Who was he to refuse?

Elou made a soft noise as he stumbled forward some, a little one-two step in the snow until the pressure on his back felt more familiar than not. He kept his smile, however, and glanced between Aymeric and the snow-laden roads. “Ah–? Nay, I’ve not had anything! I was taking in the weather, you see? I’ve not seen such a blizzard in some time and it truly is a phenomenal sight,” he trailed off in a little shiver. The Gridanian folded his arms around his sides to keep himself warm, “Thank you for your hospitality, too–I won’t be a burden, I’ll make sure of it!”

𝐅𝐑𝐔𝐒𝐓𝐑𝐀𝐓𝐈𝐎𝐍 𝐅𝐄𝐋𝐓 𝐖𝐀𝐒 𝐅𝐑𝐔𝐒𝐓𝐑𝐀𝐓𝐈𝐎𝐍 𝐔𝐍𝐀𝐍𝐍𝐎𝐔𝐍𝐂𝐄𝐃, as had ever been the case for the ravenet. so oft was conflict && that which birthed such blatant anger in others met by him with a calmed voice, little more bodily than the quaking of hands at his sides or a fretful expression gradually taking over his visage. true, there were times where he wished he could break past himself && howl at the top of his lungs. there were even times where he wished to see fist meet the features of some godsforsaken asshole who more than deserved it. alas, his was an inwardly existence && any showcase of hideous emotion should be heeded ; ‘twas truly felt && truly intentioned. earned.

❛ it is no challenge to imagine how a sight such as this could be a marvel to some ❜, the lord commander spoke, pausing only to release a sigh in a bid to self soothe as he wandered forth, gaze locked upon the other, ❛ but you’d do well to remember that mother nature cannot feel any regret should she lure you to your demise in your moment of ill judgement. ❜

he wills a smile, managing only to adopt one miniscule in size, extending not to his eyes && softening them just yet. not until relief consumed him. not until the two had found themselves in the forgotten knight, standing ‘fore a crackling hearth with table bearing food && drink so elouan could regain any strength he may have lost... aymeric takes no chances, cares not if his inquiry had been misinterpreted as asking if he was experiencing any intoxication.

[akumeis]

grumpy/sunshine trope prompts!

naturally these are shippy and soft and i'm honestly so honored that someone asked and trusted me to do these, so i hope y'all enjoy them just as much as i enjoyed writing them!

from the grump

" i know i can be an asshole, but... you always see the good in me. "

" only YOU could convince me to do something like this! "

" don't make this weird, but... i saw this in the store. figured you'd like it. "

" nobody's ever made me feel the way you do. "

" you're so full of light... and i'm terrified that i'll be the one who quenches it. "

" why do you stick around with a misery-guts like me? "

" you're the lighthouse in the fog, guiding me to shore... "

" i'm trying so hard, but... i can't stop myself from falling in love with you. "

" i love you... oh, damn it, don't look at me, i'm all red... "

" i don't really smile much. not unless you're around, it seems. "

" no. no way, no way in hell am i doing that. no! no... aw, fine... "

" how are you so happy all the time? "

" oh jeez... nobody's ever made me laugh like that in a long, long time. "

" i don't think i wanna know a world without your smiles. "

" i never feel like this grumpy asshole when you're around. i feel like... me. the real me... "

" hey, now... i'm not going anywhere. i'm gonna stay right here. right with you. "

" whoa... hey, now, who made you cry? where'd they go? "

" don't make a big deal out of this. you like hugs, right? so... here's a hug. "

" um... if you don't mind, i think i'd like a hug now. if that's okay... "

" the world just... feels right. when you're with me. "

from the sunshine

" i love it when you smile! i wish you'd do it all the time... "

" you have a really good smile, you know that? "

" see? i knew there was a soft heart under all that grumbling! "

" admit it. you had FUN today! "

" i want to know you. the REAL you. so let's go somewhere that makes you feel happy. "

" you can't get rid of me that easily. i'm gonna be here every day to remind you how wonderful you are! "

" you know me. you... you see me. i'm never totally myself unless i'm with you. "

" everyone else always sees this ridiculously happy, over excited, naive little baby who needs protecting. but... never you. you've always seen the real me. i guess that's what i love the most about you. "

" why is it so damn difficult for you to believe you're worthy of love? "

" you make me smile. and laugh. i feel happy when i'm with you! is that so hard to believe? "

" don't be so stubborn! take my coat/scarf! "

" come on! dance with me! "

" who'd have thought you'd be such a softie! "

" your smiles are like shooting stars. really rare, and really beautiful. "

" don't go. please? just... we can share the bed. i just don't want to be alone right now, if you don't mind... "

" we all have our flaws. you stayed with me in spite of mine. now i'm doing the same... "

" we're two sides of the same coin. right? "

" well, they do say opposites attract... "

" of course i remembered! i remember everything about you! "

[akumeis]

𝐇𝐄𝐀𝐃𝐒 𝐔𝐏 !! this month, i start a full time job in a hospital but am also keeping my current job in retail for the time being as a safety net / a little bit of extra money each month ( stares @ driving lessons / a ps5 ). i’m going to be working 6 days a week ━ every sunday 9 to 5 && monday to friday either doing 9 to 5s or 7 to 3s with the chance that in the future, i’ll be on less consistent schedules / i may be asked to do nights or weekends.

regardless of any of that, i’m not going to stop roleplaying but wait times for replies will ofc be a bit longer, especially in the first few weeks while i get used to doing irl stuff again. knowing my ass, i’d probably work on replies while i’m on my lunch or while i’m heading to / home from work. idk, we’ll see what ends up happening. ; v ;