alesanderpenrose

[alesanderpenrose]

It was an old habit of Alesander’s, to be so engrossed in something that he simply forgets he needs food. Sometimes on accident, sometimes on purpose. But it was the same habit no less.

It could be something as silly as being engrossed in an argument he’d had with someone, the stress and shame of the problem leaving him so focused on how much he disliked himself, he had no room to remember to eat. Sometimes he was so focused on a new project of his, he’d spend hours perfecting it, and go hours without a bite of anything to eat.

Back at home, his mother would make a huge fuss of it, telling Ales “my sweet flower, you look as if you’re wilting!” She’d sit him down, watch him until he consumed something, and tell him to never do such a thing again. But she was not here.

Now, he was so focused on making this library perfect, on not disappointing Lord Allyrion and his own family, that the thought of dinner had never crossed his mind. It wasn’t purposeful… just neglectful of himself.

Just a moment ago, he’d found an old book that he knew needed to be replaced. He ran his fingers across the dusty cover, mourning what used to be a vibrant red, now a faded pink-ish.

It was a book about gardening, perhaps? It was missing information, pages were gone, words faded, and Alesander whispered each word he could see out loud. This poor book, he thought, I’ll see to it that you’re all fixed up.

He was talking to a book as if it was his old friend, but then, someone else was talking. Not a book, or himself, but Lord Davos was talking.

When had he arrived? Alesander panicked for a moment. Oh no, is he angry with me? Did he say something important, and I missed it?

But there was no anger in Davos’ gaze. Alesander looked at the tray that had suddenly appeared on the table, a tray of food. Had he hallucinated that? He looked back up to Davos, then at the tray again. The words he said had finally processed in Ales’ mind.

“You don’t have to thank me. Just eat it.”

Alesander let out a sigh of relief. “Thank you-“ he said instantaneously, regretting the words just as quickly as he said them.

“So sorry, you just told me not to thank you, yet I did. Pathetic, isn’t it?”

Alesander thought about something for a moment. This man, Davos Allyrion, had just brought him food. He’d noticed Ales wasn’t eating, and decided to do this for him.

He thought about more things.

Lord Davos was friends with Prince Joffrey. He’d let Alesander stay here. He’d taken care of Alesander when he’d nearly died from the heat.

Looking at the food tray, his hunger finally caught up to him. He could finally eat, and he’d enjoy it, and have Davos in mind…

“You brought me dinner… that’s kind of you, my Lord. Kind of you to notice my terrible eating habits.” Alesander said with a small laugh and a little smile. Davos had noticed, and it made Ales feel something in his chest. Something sweet, something nice in comparison to how others had made him feel often.

Then, Lord Davos spoke of the library. Alesander’s eyes lit up, his smile widening now. “Oh! No, no one had told me that.”

“That’s lovely. Perhaps I’ll have to tell my father to do the same thing at the Parchments. We’re supposed to be known for our literary knowledge, yet our library isn’t as full as yours!” Realizing he was rambling now, he stopped. He scanned Davos, looking for signs of annoyance, but he didn’t find any. He was just… standing there, listening. Watching him, with careful eyes, a curious glance.

Ales looked at his feet, unable to stare any longer. “Anyway, that explains why there is so many books, and so much variety. It’s truly a privilege to see it all.”

Their eyes met now, and they both quickly looked away. “May I ask more? This place is so interesting, and so are you, Lord Allyrion…”

Once Lord Davos had left, Alesander had eaten his food, more so devoured it so fast he barely had any time to taste it. But what he had tasted was good, and he was grateful.

He’d felt less anxious than he had all day. Also less hungry, of course, and less like he was going to fall over at any given moment.

Ales was still thinking of the man who others called “the butcher.” His own brother had called him dangerous, but Alesander could not see that. He thought of his feathery hair, kind blue eyes, hands that had patterns…

But his thoughts were cut short when two ladies had decided to interrogate him. Two ladies with identical faces, and an identical amount of questions for Alesander.

Davos’ sisters. Nymeria and Larra.

Their footsteps came before them, and Alesander almost thought it was Davos coming back to continue their conversation. But then, their two heads poked around the corner, and called Alesander’s name.

Ales had felt so much sadness in that moment, not because of anything the ladies had done, but because it made him think of his own twin brother. He missed Harrold. He missed his other half.

But he couldn’t continue to feel sad for much longer, as the questions had began as soon as they approached Alesander.

“Did our brother make that food for you?”

“You’re a twin like us! What is your brother like?”

“How long are you staying here?”

“You love books, don’t you?”

“You were a steward of a Prince?”

“Did someone force you to say here? Was it your brother?”

All of their questions were asked in too much haste, leaving Alesander to answer briefly and without too much thought.

But the last question struck him hard.

“Did someone force you to stay here? Was it your brother?”

He didn’t know which twin had asked it, but he’d responded to it quicker and louder than the other inquiries that came before.

“No! I myself made the decision to stay here. I’m not a pawn for anyone. I’m just…” Just what? Useless and hoping for something better to do with his life?

He shook his head slowly. “My brother can’t force me to do anything. I’d hit him across the head if he tried. I came for him, but he didn’t want me to. But I did anyway because I care about him. Because I wanted to help him.”

A pause. Alesander couldn’t tell what the look on their faces meant. Did they doubt him? Nymeria spoke again. “…and you decided you love it so much here, you want to stay?”

“Yes. Silly me, always finding a new adventure…” A terrible attempt at a jest. Truly not even a jest, just something to say, something to make someone laugh. He didn’t know.

It was silent for a short while. Then, “I understand.” She shot a look to Larra. “We understand. We’re twins. It’s��� a special sort of bond. And besides that, we’re glad to have you. Our brother is thankful someone is finally taking care of the library.”

“But you must tell us more about you, and Harrold, and Kings Landing!” Larra said, looking to Alesander as if he held the answers to every question about Westeros she could ever have.

He could not even get another word in before the next inquiry arrived.

Nymeria then smirked, devilishly. “I heard a strange rumor about you. I heard that you and your brother dueled to be Prince Joffrey’s sworn sword!”

Alesander laughed then, truly laughed. “That is so wrong! Let me tell you both what actually happened! It was no where near as dramatic, you see…”

First impressions…

A part of @asongofgoldenfireandblackblood

Starter with @davos-allyrion

As soon as Harry told Alesander what had happened, Ales knew what he would do.

He’d save Harry from his own misery, he’d fix this problem, he’d make himself useful and get to leave Kings Landing in the process.

“Oh, I’ve met Lord Davos before, I’ll speak to him!” It was a lie. Sure, they had seen each other in passing, Alesander had watched as Davos and Toron Greyjoy had fought…

Ales couldn’t help but eavesdrop that day, thinking about how he would tell his sister Daisy all of the details later, and how he was sure Davos had looked up and caught him for a moment. But he had said nothing.

But he wanted to make Harry feel better, to make Harry not have to go through this stress his stupid prank had caused him. “It will be alright. I’ll go to Godsgrace, I’ve always wanted to visit Dorne, anyway…”

Ales ignored Harry’s pleading for him not to go, because he had already made up his mind. It would be a favor for Harry, surely, but also an excuse to leave Kings Landing and explore elsewhere. To make himself useful.

He would leave in a few days.

“…So, that’s what’s been going on with the whole brother situation.” Alesander rolled his eyes, emphasizing the word brother to show his fake annoyance at Harrold.

“I’m to leave for Godsgrace in a few days, you won’t miss me at all, correct? You can always come with me, though I know I am boring company, we could surely have fun...”

Alesander sat upright on his latest lover’s chair in his room, covering himself with his large coat, and hugging himself. Lyonel was his name, and the two had been seeing each other for months now. A man from the City Watch, one Ales had known for a while prior to their getting together. They didn’t kiss very much, or comfort each other ever, but Lyonel had a good listening ear. Or, at least, Alesander told himself that. Possibly to cope with the fact that he was most likely ignoring him rather than listening quietly. But, any company was better than none, and Lyonel was the best Alesander believed he deserved.

Alesander watched Lyonel from the chair as the other man put his City Watch armor on, side eyeing Alesander the whole time. There was no fondness in the gaze. “And you’ll be away for how long?” The other man’s voice was distant and quiet. It surprised Alesander to hear Lyonel actually respond, and he’d take anything he could get.

So responded immediately. “Oh! I’m not sure, it depends on how long the Lord Davos Allyrion wants me, hah. I think Dorne could be fun, I’ve never been and I’d love to be away from this city.” He his coat tighter to himself, always feeling the need to cover himself around Lyonel, but never certain why.

Lyonel gave him one last gaze as he put on his last article of armor. He then sat on a chair next to Alesander, a tension in the room thickening in the air. His long black hair framed his face beautifully, and his grey eyes were piercing. Alesander, being ever the flirtatious man, went to push a piece of hair out of his lover’s face. But Lyonel caught his hand before he could, holding it firmly.

“You’re lucky you’re so beautiful.” Lyonel spoke, his voice coming out as annoyed rather than fond, but his words were somehow sweet. He even rolled his eyes, the same way Alesander did previously.

Oh, Alesander thought. He never says things like this. He must want to actually come with me. Alesander felt uncomfortable when others complimented him, and he felt even more uncomfortable at the thought of someone actually wanting to do something with him. He was unused to it, but it also excited him.

He smiled brightly. “Why, thank you, but-“

“You’re lucky you’re so beautiful, because otherwise people would notice your lack of wit. But I can see through that.”

Alesanders heart dropped to his stomach. Lyonel had said that with no emotion, and stared blankly at him. It was so shocking, Alesander had to laugh.

This is what I deserve for thinking someone would want to come with me. Or want me.

Lyonel seemed to have read Alesander’s mind and angrily began to speak. “Do you really think I’d want to come with you? All you ever do is complain about yourself, write in that stupid journal, and bat your eyes at me. It’s boring, and I am officially bored. Our time apart will be a miracle.” He let go of Alesander’s hand, more so throwing it down.

Alesander laughed again and pretended the words didn’t sting. He pretended his heart didn’t hurt as he spat back at Lyonel. “Why should you think I care? I was not serious about you coming anyway.” He lied as easy as he faked amusement.

“You should care and fix yourself. You have many talents, sure, yet you do nothing with them. You tire everyone with your lackwit jokes and endless running around writing nonsense onto your pages. I hope in Dorne you can find something better to do.” He quickly sat up, moving fast towards the door.

It was everything Alesander had ever thought about himself, and to hear it out loud was shocking. It became all too real that he was all of the worst things he’d ever said about himself, and even though he deemed it all to be true, it still pained him to hear it.

Ignoring the hurt he felt, he made one last jest. One last chance to make Lyonel laugh, or smile, or curse him, or just do anything. “You also meant to say you loved me, correct?” The words came out more bitter than light-hearted. It was a horrible taunt and one that stung to say.

Lyonel did not laugh. He had the door half opened, and before he left he turned to Alesander one last time. “You should be gone before I come back.”

And he would be. Because he would then leave for Godsgrace early, without a word to anyone he knew. Just a few letters left behind, his heart broken, and a goal to fix Harry’s problems at the moment and make his own self useful.

[alesanderpenrose]

Did things ever go well for Alesander Penrose? No, It seemed he had been cursed the day he was born. Cursed to excel at every single thing he didn’t want to do, and fail at the things he really, really, wanted to do.

Perhaps the Gods did frown upon him, and he was always being punished. Perhaps he was destined to live a life of mistakes and failure, and there was nothing he could do to stop it.

Whatever it was, Alesander loathed it, and loathed himself above all.

He knew he’d been foolish to think Davos wouldn’t be able to tell the difference between him and Harrold. Harrold was slightly taller, had lighter hair, a smaller nose, built less like a twig and more like he was destined to be someone’s protecter for his whole life… Anyone who knew them was able to tell them apart, and Lord Davos knew them. Well, he knew Harrold, at least, and held no love for him.

Pretending to be his twin to apologize to Lord Davos was simply the worst idea he’d ever come up with, but he believed even if it didn’t work, that someone would find it funny…

Lord Davos was not amused, clearly, and now… Alesander was his hostage.

Hours ago, Ales had awoken abruptly, sweating and feeling as if he was deathly ill. He’d been informed of everything, too fast and all at once. Informed that the Lord of Godsgrace was not happy with him, and that he was not a guest here, but a hostage. He’d fainted upon arrival, clearly had underestimated the Dornish heat, but Lord Davos had saw to his illness… then locked him here.

Lord Davos would keep him until Harrold himself got here, and Alesander was to stay in his room and sit in his shame.

Ales’ reaction was nothing less than hysterical. He’d vomited, many times, locked himself in his room, and then began to cry. It seemed hours has passed, and the tears kept coming, his shame and sorrow never allowing him to relax for a moment.

He’d let down his family, his brother mostly, and he’d let down himself.

He wanted Harrold to stay at home, be with Joffrey, and not feel guilty over a stupid prank he’d pulled on Lord Davos. He wanted to explore Dorne, be somewhere new and exciting. Yet, all of those plans came crashing down, and here he was, lying on a pillow soaked in his own tears.

He’d denied all of the food that servants had brought to him, some of them whispering that this was his way of rebelling, but no… he could not stomach anything after

But strangely, even with all of his sadness, he felt no fear. Alesander remembered Harrold’s words well, when he had said that Davos was dangerous and all things of that sort. But, he was just a man, an angry man who was insulted by his twin, and Alesander was not afraid of him. He’d gotten himself out of many situations with angry men before, scorned lovers and ones who’d been offended at his jokes. He could get out of this… right?

He didn’t have to let everyone down just yet.

Waking up the next morning, combing his tangled curls and donning his lightest clothing, he decided he would explore this place.

He was given free rein, so long as he didn’t leave Godsgrace itself, he could roam. He’d take it, and he’d come up with a plan. Then he wouldn’t be so useless, and he’d fix things. For his brother, and for himself.

Alesander had taken himself from room to room, his feet seeming to barely touch the ground as he’d moved so fast to take in everything he was seeing. He observed the Dornish architecture, seeing how it was lovelier than Kings Landing

And it was one thing after the next. Admiring the greenhouse, thinking about how much Daisy would love it.

Admiring the training yard, fondly thinking of how Harrold would excel here.

Taking a closer look at the kitchens, thinking of how Lily would steal extra sweets and bring one to Ales.

The air seemed fresher here. Most places that weren’t Kings Landing seemed to have fresh air, but here… he felt like he could breathe again. He thought of his father, who loved his walks outside more than anything, and how he’d fondly make a jest of how his lungs would sing at this relief from the capitols air.

Alesander had stopped multiple times, admiring the outfits of others, greeting them and introducing himself. If he was going to be here a while, he might as well make an impression, he thought. And he thought of his mother, and how she’d adore Dornish fashion…

“…and this, this is the library, the largest library in all of Dorne…” A servant told him, with wariness, as he was still a hostage, and a wandering one at that now.

But every other word said by anyone else seemed to fade away, as Alesanders eyes trailed the library.

It was huge… and beautiful, even more beautiful than the one back in Kings Landing. Even more beautiful than the one in the Parchments.

I don’t ever want to leave, Ales thought incredulously. Was Godsgrace Heaven, and he had died and been sent here to admire the library for eternity?

But, even with its vast amount of space and great beauty, this library had many glaring issues.

It was filthy. Disorganized. Some of the books were falling apart, very disturbingly. There were many books that Alesander thought should be here, but were not.

Who was responsible for this tragedy?

Whoever left the library in this state was deserving of the Gods wrath, surely. But luckily, the second Penrose son had arrived, here to save it.

It was his life passion to be in a library. Back in Kings Landing, all Alesander ever seemed to do was help Lady Cissy in her archivist duties, clean up the library even when he knew others would do it, and steal some of the books.

He’d always return them, of course… but he had a passion for books. A passion for literature, and learning, and keeping things in order.

This had to be some sort of destiny, Alesander thought, flipping through the filthy pages of a storybook about a girl who fell through a hole and entered a silly land of revels and havoc. The paper crinkled loudly, and his thoughts were rampant.

Closing the book, the idea suddenly came to him.

He could fix this library. Alesander Penrose, he himself, he would do it. It would only take a few months, perhaps? Davos couldn’t turn up this opportunity, surely? Ales could finally be useful somewhere, useful and do what he’s always wanted to do.

He would get to stay here, in this beautiful place, make his family proud, do this busy work that he loved and adored.

Praying to every God, he decided that on the morrow, the third day since his arrival, he would see Lord Davos. And plead with him. And if it were to fail… then may the Gods have mercy on him.

Alesander gazed at Davos, who waited for him to speak. The butcher of Godsgrace, he thought, his brother’s warning words coming to his mind now. Could this man in front of him truly be what others said he was? Well, none of that mattered, and Alesander had to do this. He had to, for his family, and for himself.

He took a deep breath, looking into the Lord of Godsgrace’s eyes. Strikingly blue, and strikingly intense.

“Lord Allyrion, please hear my plea. I beg of you.”

Alesander had rehearsed this plea in his mind hundreds of times, but his mouth went dry now trying to force the words to come out. He was so desperate for this, and he suddenly knew what he needed to do.

Shamefully, he sank to his knees, knowing he looked pathetic. He folded his hands together, vulnerable and shaky. His fate was in the hands of Lord Davos Allyrion now, and he could only continue on.

“Do not send for my brother.

He is rude and believes himself to be funny, trust that I know this all too well. But he is a part of me. We shared a womb together, we came into this world together, my apology now is as much from myself as well as it is from him.

I am sorry for the inconvenience of what he did. I apologize deeply to you, for everything. You should not have had to suffer that disrespect.

Harrold is a good man, he often makes mistakes, but he tries. His idiotic prank was wrong, but I myself begged to come here in his place. He would have graced the Godsgrace soil in an instant if it were not for my pleading to let me come in his stead. I caused this confusion, and I would like to make up for it. For Harrold and house Penrose and myself.”

He unthreaded his fingers and placed his hands on the ground, beginning to feel as if the world as about to end around him. He had to continue, he couldn’t falter now. The ground was rough against his fingers, the dirt latching onto his soft skin as he looked at Lord Davos’ shoes.

“I know I am not much. I am a second son, worthless to you and most others. I know it is insulting that I should think you worthy of hearing anything I have to say.

But, if you should let me stay, I can make myself useful. Please hear me now. I have beheld the beauty of Godsgrace, and I am not eager to leave, and after you showed the library here, I could not help but notice it is not… in order.

So, if you would let me stay, I could restore your library. I spent most of my days in the library of Kings Landing doing just this. It will be for the sake of your forgiveness, to make up for the offensive prank. My labor will be only for your benefit.

And, I know you are intelligent enough to understand this, but if you continue to keep me hostage, the word will get out and house Penrose as well as the crown will have to get involved. Why risk more feuds and fighting when you have me, right here? I will tell my family I am staying with you, to make things right, and to put work into Godsgrace.”

He let out a shaky breath. Finally, Alesander had said it. His bargain, his plan to make things right again, his hope to prove that he is worth at least something. He looked up at Davos, feeling exposed and vulnerable. His mouth continued to plead at the sight of the Lord’s tense face.

“I will do anything you ask, anything. I will restore your library with the utmost of care. I will get on my knees and apologize every day if that is what you desire. I’ll prove to you that I’m not utterly useless.

And I will not leave until you allow me to, until all is forgiven. I am under your command, Lord Allyrion. I will be yours, I give myself to you. Let me stay.”

He knew by the sound of his voice that he was dangerously close to not being able to speak, fear of rejection and shame overtaking him. So he stopped. He felt the soil from others shoes on his hands, and he clenched them into fists. He swallowed the shame and looked into Lord Davos’ eyes again, waiting for the rejection or opportunity he’d been wanting for.

First impressions…

A part of @asongofgoldenfireandblackblood

Starter with @davos-allyrion

As soon as Harry told Alesander what had happened, Ales knew what he would do.

He’d save Harry from his own misery, he’d fix this problem, he’d make himself useful and get to leave Kings Landing in the process.

“Oh, I’ve met Lord Davos before, I’ll speak to him!” It was a lie. Sure, they had seen each other in passing, Alesander had watched as Davos and Toron Greyjoy had fought…

Ales couldn’t help but eavesdrop that day, thinking about how he would tell his sister Daisy all of the details later, and how he was sure Davos had looked up and caught him for a moment. But he had said nothing.

But he wanted to make Harry feel better, to make Harry not have to go through this stress his stupid prank had caused him. “It will be alright. I’ll go to Godsgrace, I’ve always wanted to visit Dorne, anyway…”

Ales ignored Harry’s pleading for him not to go, because he had already made up his mind. It would be a favor for Harry, surely, but also an excuse to leave Kings Landing and explore elsewhere. To make himself useful.

He would leave in a few days.

“…So, that’s what’s been going on with the whole brother situation.” Alesander rolled his eyes, emphasizing the word brother to show his fake annoyance at Harrold.

“I’m to leave for Godsgrace in a few days, you won’t miss me at all, correct? You can always come with me, though I know I am boring company, we could surely have fun...”

Alesander sat upright on his latest lover’s chair in his room, covering himself with his large coat, and hugging himself. Lyonel was his name, and the two had been seeing each other for months now. A man from the City Watch, one Ales had known for a while prior to their getting together. They didn’t kiss very much, or comfort each other ever, but Lyonel had a good listening ear. Or, at least, Alesander told himself that. Possibly to cope with the fact that he was most likely ignoring him rather than listening quietly. But, any company was better than none, and Lyonel was the best Alesander believed he deserved.

Alesander watched Lyonel from the chair as the other man put his City Watch armor on, side eyeing Alesander the whole time. There was no fondness in the gaze. “And you’ll be away for how long?” The other man’s voice was distant and quiet. It surprised Alesander to hear Lyonel actually respond, and he’d take anything he could get.

So responded immediately. “Oh! I’m not sure, it depends on how long the Lord Davos Allyrion wants me, hah. I think Dorne could be fun, I’ve never been and I’d love to be away from this city.” He his coat tighter to himself, always feeling the need to cover himself around Lyonel, but never certain why.

Lyonel gave him one last gaze as he put on his last article of armor. He then sat on a chair next to Alesander, a tension in the room thickening in the air. His long black hair framed his face beautifully, and his grey eyes were piercing. Alesander, being ever the flirtatious man, went to push a piece of hair out of his lover’s face. But Lyonel caught his hand before he could, holding it firmly.

“You’re lucky you’re so beautiful.” Lyonel spoke, his voice coming out as annoyed rather than fond, but his words were somehow sweet. He even rolled his eyes, the same way Alesander did previously.

Oh, Alesander thought. He never says things like this. He must want to actually come with me. Alesander felt uncomfortable when others complimented him, and he felt even more uncomfortable at the thought of someone actually wanting to do something with him. He was unused to it, but it also excited him.

He smiled brightly. “Why, thank you, but-“

“You’re lucky you’re so beautiful, because otherwise people would notice your lack of wit. But I can see through that.”

Alesanders heart dropped to his stomach. Lyonel had said that with no emotion, and stared blankly at him. It was so shocking, Alesander had to laugh.

This is what I deserve for thinking someone would want to come with me. Or want me.

Lyonel seemed to have read Alesander’s mind and angrily began to speak. “Do you really think I’d want to come with you? All you ever do is complain about yourself, write in that stupid journal, and bat your eyes at me. It’s boring, and I am officially bored. Our time apart will be a miracle.” He let go of Alesander’s hand, more so throwing it down.

Alesander laughed again and pretended the words didn’t sting. He pretended his heart didn’t hurt as he spat back at Lyonel. “Why should you think I care? I was not serious about you coming anyway.” He lied as easy as he faked amusement.

“You should care and fix yourself. You have many talents, sure, yet you do nothing with them. You tire everyone with your lackwit jokes and endless running around writing nonsense onto your pages. I hope in Dorne you can find something better to do.” He quickly sat up, moving fast towards the door.

It was everything Alesander had ever thought about himself, and to hear it out loud was shocking. It became all too real that he was all of the worst things he’d ever said about himself, and even though he deemed it all to be true, it still pained him to hear it.

Ignoring the hurt he felt, he made one last jest. One last chance to make Lyonel laugh, or smile, or curse him, or just do anything. “You also meant to say you loved me, correct?” The words came out more bitter than light-hearted. It was a horrible taunt and one that stung to say.

Lyonel did not laugh. He had the door half opened, and before he left he turned to Alesander one last time. “You should be gone before I come back.”

And he would be. Because he would then leave for Godsgrace early, without a word to anyone he knew. Just a few letters left behind, his heart broken, and a goal to fix Harry’s problems at the moment and make his own self useful.

[alesanderpenrose]

First impressions…

A part of @asongofgoldenfireandblackblood

Starter with @davos-allyrion

As soon as Harry told Alesander what had happened, Ales knew what he would do.

He’d save Harry from his own misery, he’d fix this problem, he’d make himself useful and get to leave Kings Landing in the process.

“Oh, I’ve met Lord Davos before, I’ll speak to him!” It was a lie. Sure, they had seen each other in passing, Alesander had watched as Davos and Toron Greyjoy had fought…

Ales couldn’t help but eavesdrop that day, thinking about how he would tell his sister Daisy all of the details later, and how he was sure Davos had looked up and caught him for a moment. But he had said nothing.

But he wanted to make Harry feel better, to make Harry not have to go through this stress his stupid prank had caused him. “It will be alright. I’ll go to Godsgrace, I’ve always wanted to visit Dorne, anyway…”

Ales ignored Harry’s pleading for him not to go, because he had already made up his mind. It would be a favor for Harry, surely, but also an excuse to leave Kings Landing and explore elsewhere. To make himself useful.

He would leave in a few days.

“…So, that’s what’s been going on with the whole brother situation.” Alesander rolled his eyes, emphasizing the word brother to show his fake annoyance at Harrold.

“I’m to leave for Godsgrace in a few days, you won’t miss me at all, correct? You can always come with me, though I know I am boring company, we could surely have fun...”

Alesander sat upright on his latest lover’s chair in his room, covering himself with his large coat, and hugging himself. Lyonel was his name, and the two had been seeing each other for months now. A man from the City Watch, one Ales had known for a while prior to their getting together. They didn’t kiss very much, or comfort each other ever, but Lyonel had a good listening ear. Or, at least, Alesander told himself that. Possibly to cope with the fact that he was most likely ignoring him rather than listening quietly. But, any company was better than none, and Lyonel was the best Alesander believed he deserved.

Alesander watched Lyonel from the chair as the other man put his City Watch armor on, side eyeing Alesander the whole time. There was no fondness in the gaze. “And you’ll be away for how long?” The other man’s voice was distant and quiet. It surprised Alesander to hear Lyonel actually respond, and he’d take anything he could get.

So responded immediately. “Oh! I’m not sure, it depends on how long the Lord Davos Allyrion wants me, hah. I think Dorne could be fun, I’ve never been and I’d love to be away from this city.” He his coat tighter to himself, always feeling the need to cover himself around Lyonel, but never certain why.

Lyonel gave him one last gaze as he put on his last article of armor. He then sat on a chair next to Alesander, a tension in the room thickening in the air. His long black hair framed his face beautifully, and his grey eyes were piercing. Alesander, being ever the flirtatious man, went to push a piece of hair out of his lover’s face. But Lyonel caught his hand before he could, holding it firmly.

“You’re lucky you’re so beautiful.” Lyonel spoke, his voice coming out as annoyed rather than fond, but his words were somehow sweet. He even rolled his eyes, the same way Alesander did previously.

Oh, Alesander thought. He never says things like this. He must want to actually come with me. Alesander felt uncomfortable when others complimented him, and he felt even more uncomfortable at the thought of someone actually wanting to do something with him. He was unused to it, but it also excited him.

He smiled brightly. “Why, thank you, but-“

“You’re lucky you’re so beautiful, because otherwise people would notice your lack of wit. But I can see through that.”

Alesanders heart dropped to his stomach. Lyonel had said that with no emotion, and stared blankly at him. It was so shocking, Alesander had to laugh.

This is what I deserve for thinking someone would want to come with me. Or want me.

Lyonel seemed to have read Alesander’s mind and angrily began to speak. “Do you really think I’d want to come with you? All you ever do is complain about yourself, write in that stupid journal, and bat your eyes at me. It’s boring, and I am officially bored. Our time apart will be a miracle.” He let go of Alesander’s hand, more so throwing it down.

Alesander laughed again and pretended the words didn’t sting. He pretended his heart didn’t hurt as he spat back at Lyonel. “Why should you think I care? I was not serious about you coming anyway.” He lied as easy as he faked amusement.

“You should care and fix yourself. You have many talents, sure, yet you do nothing with them. You tire everyone with your lackwit jokes and endless running around writing nonsense onto your pages. I hope in Dorne you can find something better to do.” He quickly sat up, moving fast towards the door.

It was everything Alesander had ever thought about himself, and to hear it out loud was shocking. It became all too real that he was all of the worst things he’d ever said about himself, and even though he deemed it all to be true, it still pained him to hear it.

Ignoring the hurt he felt, he made one last jest. One last chance to make Lyonel laugh, or smile, or curse him, or just do anything. “You also meant to say you loved me, correct?” The words came out more bitter than light-hearted. It was a horrible taunt and one that stung to say.

Lyonel did not laugh. He had the door half opened, and before he left he turned to Alesander one last time. “You should be gone before I come back.”

And he would be. Because he would then leave for Godsgrace early, without a word to anyone he knew. Just a few letters left behind, his heart broken, and a goal to fix Harry’s problems at the moment and make his own self useful.

[alesanderpenrose]

A letter to my twin…

(A part of @asongofgoldenfireandblackblood)

Starter with @hal-the-harper

Alesander had re-read his letter to his brother so many times, it would be impossible to count at this point. Did it sound truthful? Would Harry be upset, happy, mad, or something else? Would Lord Davos be okay with me sending a letter that mentions him so many times, with some of those mentions being more false than true…? The questions were endless, but he knew this letter needed to be sent sooner or later. If he kept waiting, he knew he’d find Harry at the gates of Godsgrace, ready to fight whoever he thought was keeping Ales hostage.

But no, a hostage he was not, and he hoped this letter was enough to convince Harry of that. He hoped for a lot of things at the moment

As Ales watched the wax seal cool, all he could think about was Harry. He prayed this letter was enough to rid him of his anxieties, but he knew it wouldn’t. He knew Harry too well to know that he’d feel guilty, and that made Ales feel terrible in return. He missed his brother, and he wanted to reassure him he was fine in person, but this letter would have to do for now. It was time to send it.

-

To my dearest twin, Harrold Penrose,

Let go of that breath I know you’re holding in, Harry, I am happy to report to you that I’m fine. I am more than fine, actually. This has truly been the most enlightening week. I have no regrets about coming here, I even think it was fate that you decided to pull that prank.

I spent a lot of time wandering in Godsgrace, admiring how beautiful it is here, and how much better it is than Kings Landing. Perhaps I always wanted to explore parts of the world outside of Kings Landing and the Parchments more than I ever have admitted, and that’s why I was so eager to leave in your stead.

But I also wanted to help you, and help you I have.

Lord Davos and I instantly became friends upon my arrival, he is a man of intellect and possesses a great kindness that I admire in him. I know you’re fiercely protective over your Prince, but I don’t believe he truly meant Joffrey any harm, or had any other intentions with him. You know how friendly Joffrey is, and I now see Davos has a special sort of kindness. But all is forgiven between you and Lord Davos, as Davos has decided my being here is enough.

I expect to see a letter back from you soon, thanking me for my hard work, and a gift perhaps. One of those special notebooks I’ve been wanting, the ones with the embroidered flower covers…

But no, I jest with you, Harrold. Though, you truly are the luckiest man in the Seven Kingdoms, I will tell you that. Lucky that I went to Godsgrace. My charm apparently does not always fall flat, and my talent for writing has an actual purpose now, and I will explain it all to you.

The air here is actually breathable, their food is amazing, and the people are kind and generous. But what truly drew me in was the library. I’ve never seen such a library, Harry, I thought I was dreaming the first time I saw it! I can already picture you laughing at me for this, wondering what is so special about a library, but let me tell you this, Harrold. It is huge, has everything I could ever want, and it is absolutely out of order and filthy.

That sounds awful, I know, but I could not help but be ecstatic about it. I’ve been helping Lady Cissy with the library for years, it’s my passion, and I thought to myself; “Lord Davos could make use of me.” And he’s decided he wants to. It’s hard to know what he sees in me, but he has allowed me to stay and do the work I love most.

So, I’ll be staying for a while, fixing his library and getting to know him. Do not freak out, I chose to do this. I do not know how long I’ll be here, but I’m ready for this new responsibility.

Now you can tuck your proper Prince into bed every night, happily knowing everything is fine. Though, speaking of Joffrey, I sent him a letter as well reassuring my wellbeing. I hope he’s not been too hard on you, you truly caused the best turn of events with your silly little prank, and everyone is okay. I wrote to the rest of our family so do not worry about explaining to them where I am. I made up some story to Mother and Father telling them I took the wrong route to Lannisport and ended up meeting Lord Davos, and he took me back to Godsgrace. Very far from the truth, do not tell them!

Promise me you won’t worry yourself to death, and I promise you in return that I am fine. I’ll write to you every week, I promise this as well. I love you, brother. I’ll bring you back so many gifts, you will not even have the room for them. I knew Lord Davos would forgive you, as no one can ever stay mad at you. You’re too lovable, I promise that too.

Take care of yourself, and Joffrey, and our sisters, and Mother and Father. We will see each other again, soon I hope.

- Alesander Penrose

[alesanderpenrose]

Second son of Lord Sebastion and Lady Talisa Penrose andSteward to Prince Lucerys Velaryon, Vassili Schneider, He/Him - @alesanderpenrose

Welcome, Ser Alesander of House Penrose! We’re delighted to see he has arrived safely on his journey to King’s Landing. Around the court the nineteen-year old has been praised as calm, talented, and generous but some have whispered he is also pessimistic, aimless, unforgiving. Upon his arrival, it is clear that he is in support of the reign of Westeros' first Ruling-Queen and while the eyes of our court may be fixed on House Targaryen, Queen Rhaenyra, and the future of Westeros, his true allegiance will always be to his family.

Soph, 21, she/her, EST, no triggers

[alesanderpenrose]

CHARACTER INTRODUCTION

Alesander Penrose

Basics

* Full name: Alesander Penrose

* Nickname(s): Ales, Al (only by Harrold)

* Moniker(s): Steward of Prince Lucerys, Rosebud of the Parchments

* Age: 19

* Date of birth: November 18th, 112 AC

* Pronouns and identity details: he/him, gay

* Allegiance(s): House Penrose, House Velaryon, House Targaryen, House Allyrion

* Spoken Language(s): Common tongue, can speak some High Valyrian and can fully read it

* Religion: Losely follows The Seven, more skeptical but believes in a higher power

Physical Traits

* Eyes: Green with brown flecks

* Features: Freckles, long curved nose, long eyebrows, square jaw, heart shaped lips, long eyelashes

* Hair: Extremely curly, light brown with blonde highlights, usually left messy

* Build: Lanky

* Height: 6’2

* Distinguishing Characteristics: Very bright smile but very contrasting angry glare, noticeable freckles

Personality Traits

* “Positive” Traits: Calm and collected, organized, talented in many areas and a fast learner, very giving, humorous

* “Negative” Traits: Very self deprecating, pessimistic, unforgiving, lacks ambition or aim for the future, secretive

* Moral Alignment: Chaotic good

* Interests: Literature (mostly fictional stories), horses and other animals, sword fighting, fashionable clothing

* Hobbies: Writing, reading, riding his horse Oak, finding animals to care for, training at the sword, telling stories, adventuring around Kings Landing

* Goals: Keep his family happy and in good reputation, be an apt archivist

* Anxieties: He believes often that others hate him, he believes he has no worth, he’s afraid of disappointing his family and others

* Social Weapon(s): Can make others smile and relax very easily, mostly due to the fact he comes off very friendly and is skilled at making comfortable conversation.

Connection:

* Father: Sebastion Penrose

* Mother: Talisa Penrose

* Siblings: Daisy, Harrold, Lily

* Family Status: Second born son and overall third born child

* Partner(s): In a romantic relationship with Davos Allyrion

* Children: None

* Court Ties: Steward to Prince Lucerys, son of the Lord of Parchments and the master of coin, archivist of Godsgrace