all-my-homies-hate-alden - Tumblr blog

[all-my-homies-hate-alden]

I simply do NOT NOT NOT like him. He has no right to meddle in these kids lives. He's my least favorite character so thanks for giving me an outlet where I can talk about this =)

Of course! We're glad more people can understand how we feel about Ald*n :)

[all-my-homies-hate-alden]

Alvar: Dad, I'm gay.

Alden: You were already a disappointment, at least I have F-

Fitz: Oh, Dad! While we're talking about it, I'm dating a guy.

Alden: ...what? Does anyone in this house like girls?

Biana: I do!

Alden: Where- where did you learn this was okay?

Della, letting go of Livvy's hand: Must have been those darn humans. Their crazy fantasies about loving the same gender.

[all-my-homies-hate-alden]

When I had re-read the Keefe pov in Flashback, I got really mad. Like dude, what Keefe feels is NONE of your business! Ro was right, what Alden was doing was meddling. I honestly just stopped liking him.

I think that there are so many bad things that Alden has done as a parent, but reading that pov where he just went up to a Keefe who looked to him as a father figure and told him that he needed to back off from Sophie, because she 'clearly didn't have feelings for him and he was getting in the way of what was real' (not exactly what he said but kind of summarized) just pushed me over the edge and actually made me start paying attention to how much of a horrible role model and parent he is.

[all-my-homies-hate-alden]

Also, Della wasn't even that old when they got married. At most, she was 39. They're both adults so legally it's fine, but she still seems way too young for him.

Like yes it may be legal but hello??? I just do not understand how they do not at all find it weird to be married to someone who has an age difference with you the same length or maybe even longer than between you and your kids.

[all-my-homies-hate-alden]

oh yeah and also alvar joined the neverseen because he was not very nice to him. basically, because of alden's terrible parenting skills, his son joined a group of murderers

This is honestly one of the strongest reasons that my hatred towards Alden exists besides the whole sending Fitz to the forbidden cities. I think the biggest problem with him as a person is the way he acts towards and uses his children. His good fatherliness just ain't there most of the time I stg.

[all-my-homies-hate-alden]

bruh I freaking hate a*den

-he sent fitz to search for sophie when he was six. I know elves are powerful and all but what if young fitz did some elf thing and people freaked out and killed him with guns

-It's HIS research not Fitz's and by sending fitz, he kinda spoilt his childhood years with rumours and randomly disappearing.

-what he did in keefe's short story is just horrible.

-In nightfall he was really stupid and shouldn't have sedated sophie because she still had flashbacks from her kidnapping. He should've at least had the decency to tell her before doing it.

so yeah alden is the worst

btw what are your thoughts on fitz? everyone hates him but I feel like hes one of the most normal and realistic characters in the whole series

YES I agree with all of these things. And I totally have the same opinion as you about Fitz as well!

[all-my-homies-hate-alden]

Della: welcome to the “fuck alden” support group, where we all gather here monthly to give a collective “fuck you” to him

Della: before we start, lets hear a few special words from our newest member! Alina, tell us why you would like to burn alden alive

Dame Alina: *visibly sweating* so...I may have misunderstood...

[all-my-homies-hate-alden]

Hey and welcome to the KotLC group blog where Alden haters unite and discuss! Please feel free to send in an ask if you would like to join! If you have an image you think would make a good header or pfp please feel free to let us know! Also, if you do not agree with any of the things said on this blog that is your own opinion and everything said here is ours so please keep yours on your own blog.

[all-my-homies-hate-alden]

I'm sorry but isn't Alden like canonically 100 years older than della or some shit? like bro wtf

YES this is something that just bothers me so much. Like yes elves may have lives that last thousands of years and there isn't too much of a difference in the grand scheme of things, but like just think about how Alden was already 100 or more years old when Della wasn't even BORN. The fact that their age difference is probably close to the same as her and their kids is just so weird and makes me uncomfy.

[all-my-homies-hate-alden]

@summer-waves9764 thank you for this explanation!

Alden: I am a terrible father.

Fitz: Yes, you are.

Alden: I am a miserable failure.

Alvar: Yes, you are.

Alden: I've failed.

Biana: Yes, you did.

Alden: ...I could use some words of encouragement.

Della: Yes, you could.

[all-my-homies-hate-alden]

Alden: I am a terrible father.

Fitz: Yes, you are.

Alden: I am a miserable failure.

Alvar: Yes, you are.

Alden: I've failed.

Biana: Yes, you did.

Alden: ...I could use some words of encouragement.

Della: Yes, you could.

[all-my-homies-hate-alden]

Alden is dead. The Neverseen are defeated. It's Book whatever and life is bittersweet. Did I mention Alden is dead?

[all-my-homies-hate-alden]

hi! uh, why do we hate alden? i think i missed something and am a bit confused...

well im sure if you scroll through and read our posts there will be more in depth explanations but i’ll give you a few reasons

1. he sent his son from a very young age to go out into the forbidden cities for a mission he wasn’t even supposed to be doing in the first place

2. the reason that alvar felt neglected and ended up joining the neverseen is because of the way alden treated him.

3. i think that if you have read keefes pov in the flashback paperback that speaks for itself, so if you haven’t you can read it here but if you haven’t read up to flashback yet then please don’t read it to avoid spoilers!

let us know if you have any questions!

[all-my-homies-hate-alden]

Alden was eaten by Iggy book one thank you for coming to my Ted Talk.

[all-my-homies-hate-alden]

no need to worry (aggressive)

[all-my-homies-hate-alden]

i most certainly would not

you wouldn’t download a #alden vacker.

[all-my-homies-hate-alden]

Alden: How is that “gay” phase going?

Biana: Better than your marriage.