alternian-life-advice - Tumblr blog

[alternian-life-advice]

Going hemoanon and no quirk for now, but to all the mutant bloods reading this some berries can temporarily stain your blood a different color, which can help you hide it if your mutation is more mild, keep yourself safe

gräh ïm ä pürplëblööd änd ï *hätë* mütänts

jk thäts hëllä cööl stäy säfë mütänts

[alternian-life-advice]

need to find ways to pester my kismesis. ideas?

sënd thïs ïmg öf märkïe plyërr shït töns öf tïmës lmäö

[alternian-life-advice]

WHAT HAVE YOOU DOONE TOO MY POOST OOnOO

wait soo the signless was an actual guy and noot just a crazy stoory?

[alternian-life-advice]

i am a trooll with highly esteemed tastes. alsoo the "in which rustblooooded bellah surwan mooves too a nestle oof hives in the western alternia rustics and meets aloooof and mysterioous jadeblooood whoo is secretly a rainboowdrinker, edward cullen, and have a secret red roomance that has black tendencies" saga is pretty gooood and noo oone can tell it isnt!

MOST EXH^USTING NIGHT ^ND D^Y OF MY FUCKING LIFE. HEY KIDS REMEMBER, ITS FUN IN ROMCOMS WHEN THE PROT^GONIST RUNS DR^M^TIC^LLY THROUGH THE SUN TO MEET THEIR P^LE PITY INTEREST, BUT IT FUCKING SUCKS ^ND HURTS IN RE^L LIFE DO NOT ^TTEMPT IT ^T HOME

[alternian-life-advice]

i thoought jadebloooods liked the sun? oor is that just in rainboowdrinker red erootica?

MOST EXH^USTING NIGHT ^ND D^Y OF MY FUCKING LIFE. HEY KIDS REMEMBER, ITS FUN IN ROMCOMS WHEN THE PROT^GONIST RUNS DR^M^TIC^LLY THROUGH THE SUN TO MEET THEIR P^LE PITY INTEREST, BUT IT FUCKING SUCKS ^ND HURTS IN RE^L LIFE DO NOT ^TTEMPT IT ^T HOME

[alternian-life-advice]

that's just cruel... OOnOO

YEP TH^TS RIGHT. HES ^^^^^^

L^ST N^ME CENSORED BEC^USE IM ^ BITCH BUT IM NOT ^N ^SSHOLE

[alternian-life-advice]

OO_OO

I soometimes feel like we as a species shoould oof stooped making slang sweeps agoo.

{when} you're trying to talk with the superior class & your overly interrupting lowblood subordinate says "ocular spherule" instead of "eye"

[alternian-life-advice]

fun f^c+. culling dr^nes ^re surprisingly vuner^ble ^round +heir join+s. +heir pl^+ing c^n’+ effec+ively cover +hose p^r+s. ^ sh^rp long-dis+^nce we^pon is bes+.

(@abnegatedadherant)

dämn düdë thäts ïntërëstïng äf

[alternian-life-advice]

^re we ^llowed +o submi+ our own ^dvice.

(@abnegatedadherant)

oof coourse! i'm noot oomniscient and my mooirail isn't exactly the wisest oof ladies soo we woould appreciate any help we coould get OOuOO

[alternian-life-advice]

what is befoorus? OO~OO

[alternian-life-advice]

what oon alternia is happening too my poost!?

wait soo the signless was an actual guy and noot just a crazy stoory?

[alternian-life-advice]

blatant misinfoormatioon!? i did noot becoome hiveless foor soome nooooksucker too say i'm lying! ÒÒnÓÓ

No quirks, hemotyping, or any other identifying information will be included in this submission. I refuse to put myself or the bastard fucks around me in danger with this line of question, so I will only ask the following: How do I care for a grub? Finding them a lusus is out of the question.

I have plenty oof experience with this oone... Due too the *circumstances* that goot my subgrub destrooyed. Buy doouble whatever yoou usually buy (if soomeoone asks, say yoou've goot a particularly upset mooirail that your feeling jamming with) and doon't ever parade it aroound, yoou'll hurt a loot oof troolls by making it super knoown. Hoope yoou and yoour grub are safe!

[alternian-life-advice]

i thoought peoople just made him up as like a symbool oof soomeoone whoo is cooool aboout everyoone!

wait soo the signless was an actual guy and noot just a crazy stoory?

[alternian-life-advice]

wait soo the signless was an actual guy and noot just a crazy stoory?

[alternian-life-advice]

I really need some #elp!

So, I own and run t#is lusus ranc#, and one of my workers recently lost t#eir lusus! Sad, but #ey, it #appens! T#e provolone is, I t#ink t#ey mig#t be planning to steal a new one!? T#ey*ve been eyeing t#is one really skittis# tinkerbull t#at i guess t#ey mig#t t#ink wouldn*t be missed!? #ow do i #elp t#em pick out a more fitting one wit#out letting t#em know t#at i Know w#at t#ey*re doing!?

soo it's noot the lusus theft that's the issue but yoou think they haven't choosen the right lusus? ¯⁠\⁠_(OOuOO)_⁠/⁠¯ i doon't really have a say oon that part but i doo here: doon't tell anyoone i knoow this but... there are some mutant lusii in soome oof the moore secluded parts oof west alternia, big huge crabdads. foor they're sheer size and scariness they're actually quite nurturing! i'd persoonally ask if they wanted too goo oon a ooutside hive trip nearby there, they'll proobably see them and ask, yoou impart yoour knoowledge. prooblem soolved OÒvÓO

[alternian-life-advice]

Hey everyboody I'm back oon my walknubs and able too poost again! I hoope my mooirail was nice while I was goone but I'm glad I'm back OOuOO

[alternian-life-advice]

wtf ïs göïng ön grümblr änd whÿ döës mÿ möïräïl lïkë thïs shïthölë sö müch?

actuwually, i’ll say it.

i’m fuwucking TIR:3D of all th:3s:3 trans-cast:3 tr:3nd:3rs. youwu ar:3 making R:3AL TRANSCAST:3 P:3OPL:3 LOOK BAD!!!

most of th:3m ar:3 juwust lowbloods who ar:3 j:3alouwus of highbloods! youwu CANNOT B:3 FUWUCKING TRANSCAST:3 IF YOUWU DONT HAV:3 H:3MODYSPHORIA!!!

“ wahhh i wanna b:3 fuwuschia b:3cauwus:3 i shouwuld ruwul:3” SHUWUT UWUP BRONZ:3 BOY YOUWU AR:3 LIT:3RALLY CUWULL BAIT!!!!

youwu ar:3 not trans-cast:3 withouwut dysphoria. :3nd of story.

🐾mod n:3p:3ta🐾