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Solidarity cat. (via)

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*opens the oven after preheating to 400*

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https://twitter.com/hidekiccan/status/1414210508433985539

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They literally work every day with very ill cancer-stricken kids who can't get the vaccine.

This makes 100% sense.

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so i gotta live? and be ugly?! LMAOOO

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AND YET A TRACE OF THE TRUE SELF EXISTS IN THE FALSE SELF

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me: *overestimates the length of a yellow light and completely 100% runs a red light* me while driving away: I AM A BEACON OF SIN I AM A BEACON OF SIN I AM A BEACON OF SIN I AM A BEACON OF SIN I AM A BEACON OF SIN I AM A BEACON OF SIN I AM A BEACON OF SIN I

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if I wrote a dystopian novel where the corrupt evil megacorporation that controls society has a fucking smirk for a logo, my editor would tell me to use a less heavy-handed metaphor

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I love how both corvids and parrots are in general highly intelligent, but where corvids generally have strict hierarchies, solve disagreements in the pecking order by fighting, and have a strong dislike for anything new or foreign until they figure out how to make use of it, parrots are just here to party.

The New Caledonian crow, who knows how to specifically build a tool in order to build another tool, never engages in play. These motherfuckers are smarter than some people with the right to vote, and they are Extremely Serious Birds. They don't have time to play, they got work to do and kids to raise.

And then there's the kea, straight-up titled "clown of the mountains", that has a specific vocalization for "playtime!". Scientists decided to try what happens if they play the Play Call for two fully-grown adult keas that are together in an area and can clearly see there is no other, third kea to make the call, and they just go "great idea, disembodied voice! it's TIME TO FUCKING PARTY!" and start wrestling.

Imagine working really hard in order to make it into a top university to study astrophysics, making it to your first Very Serious Class, sitting down full of serious determination, and the dude next to you is taking notes without using his hands, with a glitter pen he's shoved up his nose. And his notes are good.

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guess who just found out the difference between wax paper and parchment paper the hard way

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being in your 20s is like. every day i am playing with forces i can barely understand

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the whole squad

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Everyone in NYC got a screeching emergency alert telling us not to heat up our food. Yet all the commercial billboards, NYPD stations, and other utterly unnecessary utilities are left powered on. That’s class warfare, plain and simple.

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CONFIRMED

CONFIRMED

CONFIRMED

CONFIRMED FOR DONALD AND GLADSTONE’S CARS