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yo does anyone else feel CONSTANTLY guilty? like you’ve always done something wrong but you don’t know what it is?

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u try to be cute when it seems like sexual harassment

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not a lot just forever

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u wanna be like lean but it aint as easy as it seems

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الغريب في الأمر أنكَ مازلتَ تنتظر ، رغم كُلّ هذه الخيبة على وجهك

The strange thing is that you are still waiting, despite all this disappointment on your face.

- Mahmoud Darwish

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“Marriage: It Isn’t about Rainbows and Butterflies Most of us girls have dreamt of the big day; we have all imagined ourselves as brides, dressed in a fluffy white dress, surrounded by flowers, and having our cheeks burning red from the hundreds of eyes following our steps. YES! It’s the wedding day. Watching Disney movies when we were younger, most of us happily sobbed at how the prince and princess overcame all the hardships and evils, to be with one another on the lifelong journey of marriage. But, what happened next? Did we watch how Cinderella was able to manage her arguments with the prince on how to set the sofa in front of the TV? Or how Belle would be able to balance between her work and her home if she decided to pursue a career? What about Snow White’s cooking skills, and if her prince charming enjoyed her food? Unfortunately, the princess movies didn’t prepare us for what came after the white dress. Being married for 3 months now, I obviously can’t say I am an expert on the subject, but I can confidently say I have learnt some of the perks and hardships of marriage that I’d like to share with you. Art of Cooking: Yes, I could boil an egg, and make a cup of tea, and all the “essential” stuff that we thought could easily get us through our roles as a chef in our new home. But, the ugly truth is: those “essentials” are definitely not enough. Don’t wait until you’re standing in front of the stove in your new home, wondering what cooked meat should look like. Or, if maybe this gooey thing, supposed to be rice, maybe needed much less water to cook properly. I truly advice you to kickstart your cooking lessons BEFORE you get married. Stand with your mother, sister, or anyone you enjoy their cooking and take notes. Yes, as in get yourself to a stationery store and buy a little notebook, mark it “cooking recipes” and make it your best friend. Have it with you every time you are invited over to dinner at someone’s house, and if you really like one of the dishes, don’t be embarrassed to ask for the recipe. It will really come in handy when you’re married, more than you know! “But what if I feel he doesn’t like my cooking?” Then ASK him! Some husbands don’t wait for you to ask and blurt out their opinion, which could be a negative one. But don’t take it too personally and use it as constructive criticism, instead of crying about in the middle of the night. Don’t be hard on yourself, you are still learning, and it will take a while until you comprehend all his preferences. So ask him what he thought of today’s dinner, and what he would have liked better. You would be surprised, but he could have some good recommendations. “Ahh, I just cut my finger!” That’s OK. It happens, alongside some burns and possible bruises. On my first day of cooking, I ended up with two cuts on each of my thumbs, and I had my husband finish off the cooking while I guided him verbally. But, since then, I have been safe and sound, for most of the time, with great cooking results, also most of time. So don’t give up on yourself or undermine your abilities if you end up with some minor wounds in the beginning. You have a new roommate: It seems strange that after a lifetime with your family, you are now going to live with a new person. It’s exciting, and a bit scary, but most importantly it’s different. Your partner has also lived a certain lifestyle for his share in life, and you’re about to witness it full time. Some of things might seem odd, frustrating, or annoying, but you have to understand that it’s the same thing for him. You might have different sleeping habits, or preferences on how you like the room to be organized, or how early you like to have your breakfast. But, should that mean you panicking and declaring an independent room in the house? No. Breathe, talk and compromise. Jabir reported that the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) said about Iblees: “The nearest to him are the greatest at causing tribulations. One of them says: I have done such-and-such. Iblees says: You have done nothing. Another one says: I did not leave so-and-so until I caused discord between him and his wife. Iblees says: You have done well.” (Muslim 2813) SO, don’t let the shaytaan disrupt your relationship with your husband about trivial matters. It is in those situations that the shaytaan tries to intrude and cause fights about things that could have been solved by logical and calm discussions. You will not be able to change all of your husband’s old manners, or always find a common ground, but the situation is vice versa for him. So, you should both learn to embrace each other habits, as long as one of you isn’t causing harm to the other. I think one of the most important keys to a healthy and happy marriage is to be considerate of each other’s feeling. The Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) instructed us to love for others what one would love for himself. And so should be the case when treating your husband. Try not to nag, and understand that when he is tired, or frustrated, it’s not the right time to tell him you accidently broke the new microwave, and need a new one. Expect that he will not always be in a good mood. I know that’s not what we see on movies and read in novels, so I am sorry to burst your bubble, but marriage isn’t always going to be rainbows and butterflies. You have to learn to love your spouse unconditionally in the sake of Allah, and help each other through this duniah to reach Jannah in the hereafter.”

— Sarah N. Saad

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;)

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Ya Allāh, do not leave for us a sin except that You forgive it.

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اللهم اجعلني سبباً للخير لكل نفس أقابلها

Oh Allah, make me become a source of goodness for every soul that I meet.

Ameen

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Don't let them tell you your activism isn't changing anything.

Keep fighting the good fight!

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fasting during Ramadan is one way you tell your nafs no, when you are greater than your nafs

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"When Allah decides to grant you something ,the process begin with the crushing of Nafs. Since the nafs is occupied with petty desires, it was crushed to create the capacity to hold Haq.

When you look back, you will find a great deal of crushing behind your continued success.

This is the law of nature. The length of hardships we go through is a sign that a gift is waiting for us at the end.

Behind every pain, there is a hidden mercy and wisdom of our Lord.

Pain is the sign of His love for us.

If pain and hardship was considered a torture, His awliya would have never tested with that."

Via Farah Siddiqi's Facebook page.

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10 Ways you can Overcome your Nafs (Commanding Soul)

1. Constant Purification

Increase in your worship acts and strive for obedience of Allah at all times. Follow His guidance through the teachings of the Quran and Hadith. You should prioritize with the compulsory acts such as five daily prayers, even as you try to pick up the supererogatory ones.

2. Conscious Awareness

Your nafs is conscious and as such you have control over decisions you make that will impact your daily life and the hereafter. Therefore be conscious of Allah at all times and make a choice to break free from the negative desires and inclinations.

3. Avoid Sins and Prohibitions

And always follow an evil thought, speech or act with a good one. You can achieve this through learning and seeking beneficial knowledge. In that way, you can sieve the truth from falsehood; and permissible acts from prohibitions.

4. Remember the Test of Temporal Life

This temporary life is a test and a preparation for the ultimate abode – the everlasting world and hereafter. Which then is more worthy of striving for?

5. Follow the Sunnah

In our beloved Prophet, we have the perfect example. So follow him and you won’t go wrong.

6. Think of Positive and Negative Effect of Every Action

For example, with the 5 daily prayers the benefits from physical to psychological bring serenity and a tranquil effect even beyond the prayers. While delaying/missing prayers due to laziness and negligence may bring about guilt, feeling of burden, regret, need to make excuses etc in addition to amassing sins.

7. Use your Time Wisely

Assess your time and accompanying deeds. And try to keep positively busy with rewarding acts. Do something for the Ummah without expecting a profit. Make it an investment for your hereafter.

8. Keep Good CompanyMind your environment and those you choose to stay around. Choose those who can help guard your creed and deen.

9. Purify your Acts through your Intention

Renew them as often as you can, centered on Allah’s pleasure and to earn paradise. Isn’t paradise and its wonders enough motivation to give up the instant gratifications for?

10. Make Dua

Make supplications for a sound and pure heart; one that is filled with Allah’s love but yearns for even more of Allah’s love.The heart can only become sound, achieve success, take pleasure, be satisfied, experience enjoyment, become pleased, attain serenity and calmness through the ibadah (worship) of its Lord; having love of Him and turning to Him (in repentance). Even if it were to attain every type of pleasure from creation, it will not acquire serenity and tranquillity. This is because the heart possess an intrinsic need for its Lord, since He is its deity, love and pursuit and with Allah the heart achieves joy, pleasure, delight, amenity, serenity and tranquillity. (Ibn Taimiyyah’s essay of Servitude)