antiarcticmonkeys

[antiarcticmonkeys]

the only bad part of transitioning is that I now care about clothes and the situation is dire

[antiarcticmonkeys]

they fucking ruined the word minion. the whole word, ruined, forever. they spent a billion dollars to change the meaning and ruin the word forever. there should be a class action lawsuit

[antiarcticmonkeys]

Something that I get chills about is the fact that the oldest story told made by the oldest civilization opens with "In those days, in those distant days, in those ancient nights."

This confirms that there is a civilization older than the Sumerians that we have yet to find

Some people get existential dread from this

Me? I think it's fucking awesome it shows just how much of this world we have yet to discover and that is just fascinating

[antiarcticmonkeys]

Five months into Trump's presidency, and we are in a war.

Did his supporters have that on the bingo card?

[antiarcticmonkeys]

basically:

it is not a virtue to not set boundaries

ignoring your own wants and needs is not a healthy way to show love

people worth loving will respect your boundaries

people worth loving will not want you to set aside your own wants and needs to make them more comfortable

‘having no boundaries at all’ describes a person who is very hurt, not a person who is very virtuous

suffering for others’ comfort is not how you be a good person, it is just how you become very hurt

sometimes you need to make others uncomfortable in order to get your needs met

your needs are more important than others’ comfort

your comfort is equally important to others’ comfort

making other people uncomfortable is not, in itself, ethically wrong or morally dubious

[antiarcticmonkeys]

What do people do about dom guilt/shame after engaging with “hard” kinks? I just tried knife play for the first time last night and I had a really good time toying with my sub and just seeing this other side of him that really wants to get cut up. I’m worried I crossed some kind of invisible line and I’m evil now even though we both liked it.

We’re both inexperienced with engaging with “hard” kinks and we have some mutual friends and I’m unsure what they’d think of me if they knew. So that adds to the stress a little. At the same time though, I love that he trusted me enough to ask for that and the look he got in his eyes was incredible.

aftercare! Doms need aftercare! especially after doing darker or more serious scenes. One Dom that I know has his subs message him the day after a particularly intense scene to check in and reassure him that he is not a bad person, that they actively wanted everything that he did, and that they are doing well (or if they are struggling in some way, he wants them to tell him so that they can work through it and he can offer support). so much of the focus gets put on the needs of the sub in these matters, and on protecting the sub from harm, but it is equally important to make sure that the Dom is given space to self-regulate, reassurance, comfort, or whatever it else it is that they need to process this stuff.

you'll come to know a lot better with the more practice that you have. some people are really fired up energetically after a big Dommy see and what they really need is to eat a meal and take a walk and cool down a bit. other people like the conventional cuddling while watching a movie and eating sweet snacks form of aftercare that comes most readily to people's minds. but psychologically the impact of being a Dom is quite different from that of submitting, and so you may need things like seeing your sub exercise agency, having somebody else take care of you and making decisions, a lot of detailed feedback on how the scene went from the subs perspective, everybody to switch out of role and to act relatively normal and jokey, or some combination of these things.

for now, continue talking it through with your partner, ask them for support and care, and maybe journal a little bit on how you're feeling in the days after a scene. It is completely normal to experience a drop and to feel tired, disgusted, ashamed, we're like you're a bad person, and you can learn to anticipate this and work with it to minimize how much it bothers you and prevent a lot of larger meltdowns from occurring. but the only way we figure this stuff out is from learning! feeling a little bit bad or even a lot bad it's not a sign that you've screwed up here. it's just data. and so it's all very worthwhile to get.

[antiarcticmonkeys]

something vindictive but ultimately harmless I do at work is that if you’re at my register and you’re rude to me and you pay with cash I am finding the most disgusting desolate fucked up unspeakable coin I can to give to you. oh you were mean to me? you’re getting the yucky nickel bitch

[antiarcticmonkeys]

You know, that Mythbusters post legitimately changed my life. Before seeing it, I had exponentially more guilt and stress about not being able to sleep, which of course, further exacerbated my inability to sleep.

Now, every time I wake up about three am, knowing I have to get up at 6.45, instead of stressing and panicking about how my day is going to be sleep deprived and miserable, I just tell myself 'Time to activate Mythbusters Protocol' and lie there with my eyes closed safe in the knowledge that I am measurably reducing later feelings of exhaustion.

And when this happens, about 70% of the time the reduction of guilt and stress means I actually do fall back asleep, so all in all instead of getting only three or four hours sleep, I get five to six and a half.

Which y'know, major improvement in health and energy.

[antiarcticmonkeys]

[antiarcticmonkeys]

A question most people successfully avoid asking: can institutionalized patients ever have sex? The answer is ‘mostly no, unless they are very good at sneaking past nurses’. They also can’t kiss, hold hands, cuddle, or have any other form of romantic contact.

I worked in a mental hospital where two patients snuck past nurses and had sex once. It was treated as a public health crisis of approximately the same urgency as somebody throwing a bucket of Ebola-laced chimp blood all over the dining room. Both patients lost all their privileges, earned themselves 24-7 supervision by nurses, got restricted to their rooms, and had to go through a battery of tests for every STD in the book. We the doctors got remedial training with helpful tips like “If two patients seem to like each other too much, put them on opposite sides of the unit so they’re never in contact.” -SSC

[antiarcticmonkeys]

oh also? An absolutely freaky thing I'm seeing yt leftists do?

STOP TRYING TO TRACK DOWN PROTESTORS THAT DO 'BADASS STUFF'. STOP POSTING ABOUT IT ONLINE.

PEOPLE FUCKING DIE.

AND IT'S USUALLY SOMEONE MELANATED.

THE GOVERNMENT IS WATCHING YOU FUCKING DUMBASS.

y'all are so stuck on egoistic heroism that every time someone does something 'sick' at a protest you wanna turn them in to the next celebrity to have a parasocial relationship with and then they go missing.

Tf is wrong w y'all.

[antiarcticmonkeys]

[antiarcticmonkeys]

[antiarcticmonkeys]

[antiarcticmonkeys]

the funniest and most tragic moment in steven universe is the scene that implies that Pearl pulls bitches like a professional dog walker but doesn't know how phones work so her place on earth is being a life-changing futch fling for every dyke on the east coast there's probably a gay bar in maryland where they talk about the twiggy bird chick that eats milf pussy like it's the last edible thing on earth and they dont even know about the city full of thousand year old neon lesbian amazons who are pent up 24/7 from The War and leaving room for jesus cause they're always hanging out with their softboy nephew who might be the second coming of christ

[antiarcticmonkeys]

When I was 19-21 years old living on the streets in california the people who cared for me the most were never the people who could care for me comfortably. It was never the channels that were intended to or designed to help me. Not my dad or my local government or anyone with the authority to make things happen. It was my friend's stoner mom who got by on community aid who made me the best damn lentil soup ill ever have (no really that ruined the dish for me nothing has ever come close to that soup) and let me sleep on her floor. It was my ex who hated my guts but still set me up with toiletries when i needed them. It was the father of a classmate who met me by coincidence one time in a park and brought me home to share taco night together. It was the barista who got in trouble for giving me free coffee. It was the other homeless person who I shared some candy with who gave me his blanket. It was the randos at the bar who brought me to get stitches one night. The have-nots have always had more to give than people who believe themselves in a position of power. You can pick any one ivy league graduate and they will have a sob story for you. They will have excuses for why they don't care. They're scared and gormless and it'll take a hell of a lot to make me care about them. I guess what I'm trying to say is that as much as everything sucks and we're all fucked over every day, nothing can ever impede your own actions more than the feeling that you cannot make an impact. The initiative needed to make the world a better place lurks in everyone, it's your responsibility to nourish it. Volunteer somewhere, talk to someone on a bad day, give people the time of day to explain themselves. When you can, reach out to help someone. And when you can't, don't ignore them. Be kind to your friends and neighbors. It's literally always been and will always be about community. I love every one of you truly.

[antiarcticmonkeys]

sometimes i struggle to use the word ‘bootlicker’ in a negative sense because of sexual desires i will not disclose here