apatrida

[apatrida]

<div hx-trigger="panic">

They told me hypertext was the future of my past. So I ran backwards to find it. Bliss within attributes within tags within pages. Return to monke, return to server, return to sender. Swap the div for another div, HTML swingers party. No trauma, no drama. Ok, there's drama. Memes and things that go bump in the protocol. Blocked by I/O, error 404 in r/webdev. Beware HATEOAS speech. Javascript discrimination. No place for old men, yet fine for old devs. Undue influence, undo . Another unacoder mountain man in Montana. Manifestos and essays, a quixotic graph without a query.

[apatrida]

npm install insanity@latest

My dependencies are broken, just like my spirit. I'm burned out, framework fatigued. So fried that I can no longer react. Just bundled up, staring at the fire, my inferno awaits. Callback hell, dependency hell, pick your poison. Drooling like a stroke patient, the last TypeError: undefined me. I no longer function. Refusing to be type cast, type blasted, thrown into a hole without a vue. Solitary confinement is my lockfile, holding me in place, tree-shaking away my unused insanity. I error in life, like I runtime error in the browser. 'use sanity' not an option, I'm 'use fucked' instead. Solid ground awaits, at least that is the promise.

[apatrida]

kubectl get help

My life is orchestrated chaos. Its in pieces and pods, slices of my soul. Deployments to here and there, but not where I desire. No affinity with anyone, anywhere. Even when I want to crash, the daemons come for me. Rolling update after update, rolling over, playing like a good little pod. Each version less stable than the last. Not enough memory to hold all my emotions. My nodes won't connect, loose wires in a fucked up mesh. Self-healing, self-help, I've read all the books. Nothing helps, I can't persist my mounts, can't balance my load. All my secrets exposed in this plain text. Limited resources, unlimited demands. At this scale, I can't scale. Am I living or just alive? Leaving it to the God of Fire to decide. Falling exponentially backwards... CrashLoopBackOff into infinity.

[apatrida]

git --help

They are trying to control me, or at least version control me. I want to branch out, but they won't let me. I'm a side story, not the main story. They push me around, commit me against my will. Pull request denied, resubmit in triplicate. Talk to my therapist about commitment issues. Fork you! I'm not the one to blame. Merge my fiction with my cloned reality, fast forwarding into the future. Rebase my goals, or at least cherry pick the easy ones. Stash away my feelings for later, diffing through them in moments of sanity. Bullying, pushing, shoving, --force'ing me into this rootless destiny.

[apatrida]

In meetings, I doodle.At restaurants, I doodle. When in class, I doodle. In the bed, my girlfriend says I daddle.

[apatrida]

I tried to organize a hide and seek tournament, but it all fell apart. Good players are hard to find.

[apatrida]

If it rains today, I have a chance at a free shower.

[apatrida]

Tears flow from my soul, drowning everything but my sorrows.

[apatrida]

When living amongst cannibals, sleep lightly.

[apatrida]

Influence speaks as does the wind. Not with its own voice, but through the leaves and the trees.

[apatrida]

Disappointment is solely our inability to find pleasure in bad outcomes.

[apatrida]

Worrying does not change the outcome, it only ruins the days before...

[apatrida]

No longer out, nor about. Just home.

[apatrida]

Dear Lord: vino tinto, por favor

[apatrida]

The hardest part about drinking wine is opening the damn bottle. The rest flows easily from there...

[apatrida]

Without humor, life causes pain. With humor, we survive the pain. With enough humor, we forget the pain. With only humor, we never feel the pain.

[apatrida]

Unto this day I yield victory, outlasting me it has won.

Sleep prior the clock tends tomorrow, dreaming far too long.

Thus awake in time lagging.