aquamotto - Tumblr blog

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Me on my birthday (today)

Jan van Beers - Emperor Charles V as a child (1879)

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I am turning 34 years old!

And I am celebrating this event being utterly sick, unfortunately.

Because of this, you get not a picture of a character, serious or ironic, but simply myself, how I look like, more or less.

As you can see, I have been very stoic. Living in the state of war, enduring constant illnesses and hardships even before the war, I get the highest grade in stoicism and patience. Unfortunately, that's not what I want, at all. I have been at the crossroads lately, feeling too drained to improve my art but also too impatient to become better in order to accomplish something of worth. I have been wanting to make my art feel more 'western' but doing that kind of loses its originality in part and taking it in more 'manga' direction feels juvenile and self indulgent, at least, at my age. I have many things going that I can't mention here because that would endanger other, more valuable parts of myself, parts of me related to my activities in the real world. I want to convey a feeling of "Eastern European anime" with my art, mixing 20s-30s-40s' illustration with some more japanese expressiveness. And as someone from Ukraine, I often feel like I have seriously outgrown any author, japanese or western, because of the profound, uncalled wisdoms the world keeps showering me with everyday.

I can't relate to any living author at all actually which affects my progress - how can I aspire to be someone who is so much younger than me in terms of human experience? I never particularly related to daily troubles of people and now I relate to them even less. People keep telling stories that are so mundane nowadays - like those Sundance and Berlinale film directors with their constant family dramas. People are so navel gazing. Dissecting every little unimportant thing when the Apocalypse is unraveling just over their heads.

Thank you for staying with me and supporting me. Contrary to the popular notion, I actually love the world and everyone in it.

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Distracted

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Hey, what is your Kofi may I ask? I love the sketchy watercolour style of your art, it feels very nostalgic and comforting!

Thank you so much for your kind words!

I am glad you feel that way about my art because this is partly the effect I am trying to achieve! <3

My kofi is ko-fi.com/aquamotto! But wait a second, first I need to relink my ko-fi account to a different PayPal account! I lost my other one and a new one had problems, too! I will try relinking today and will notify you! My country doesn't allow the full scope of PayPal functions yet such as 'commercial' activities and ko-fi, as I found out, is considered 'commercial'! :|

However, it is maybe possible to buy commissions by directly transferring to Paypal! I will check first though! Thank you for asking! :)

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Guilt

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'And at that moment, I thought to myself: as much as I am a researcher and a scientist, there is unexplored depth in me I want to remain a mystery. I didn't want to become an expert on human nature; I didn't want to know myself intimately. The angry sea in front of me was unexplored enough, and probing further into myself too would be just falling down.'

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Hello please reblog this if you're okay with people sending you random asks to get to know you better

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A sea tower

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What if I am a king from a prophecy???

Another maniac for you on a manic day. Trying to do the same kind of art on paper I would do on a tablet. (It's difficult)

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Guess who is having a birthday? (With missiles)

On this wonderful occasion, I will post some images that are Aquamotto coded.

Happy birthday to me!