archdivine

[archdivine]

WASTEISOLATION by the blackdresses sentence starters.

“ you’ll never find a way out. “

“ someday you won’t recognize me. “

“ someday you won’t even know who i am. “

“ it doesn’t matter, even if i get it wrong. “

“ sometimes i think that i’m dreaming. sometimes i know that i’m not. “

“ i think i fear you. “

“ i know you’re scared of me, so i’m scared too. “

“ the difference is… i don’t want to kill you. “

“ i live in sickness. “

“ feels kinda like my soul is burnt. “

“ this shit’s too evil to be stylish. “

“ i want to crush you with my jaws. “

“ i don’t feel like i can be anything more than this. “

“ i just want to be whatever you want me to be. “

“ i don’t want to have a soul. “

“ i don’t know what i am but i want you to show me. “

“ i don’t want to have the capacity to feel lonely. “

“ i want you to destroy me so i’ll feel better. “

“ i want to go to hell together. “

“ tell me how to feel. “

“ i don’t know what’s real. “

“ i want to replace myself with the best parts of you. “

“ i don’t want to be anything close to what i knew. “

“ i want to empty out my mind and make it something i can use. “

“ i want to burn away my childhood and scatter something new. “

“ it doesn’t matter if i die. “

“ is there any truth to what you tell me you know about me? “

“ i am not like you. “

“ i want to forget myself and be lied to. “

“ i don’t know if anything’s right, i’m just a girl who can’t look herself in the eye. “

“ it’s the fucking worst, isn’t it? it’s so fucking cursed, isn’t it? “

“ i don’t fucking want to hurt anyone. “

“ i just want to feel anything before i’m done. “

“ you cannot pretend to be close with me. “

“ i burn so fucking bright but your eyesight only sees ashes. “

“ look in my eyes and see the person you damaged. “

“ i run away but they keep following. “

“ what did i do to incur a body that just screams, and dies, and hurts? “

“ i feel like a kind of human curse. “

“ i know i don’t belong, but i have nowhere else to stay. “

“ i’m so sorry i’m here. please don’t kill me. “

“ if i was a killer, i’d kill me too. “

“ i don’t want anything, i just want to survive. “

“ i know i’m nothing to you, i know i’m not even alive. “

“ i’m sorry that i scare you. “

“ i know you’re something different. “

“ you can’t hide it, you can’t miss it. “

“ sometimes i think i’m dead. “

“ i feel like someone else. “

“ i don’t know where i’ve been and i’m scared to ask. “

“ i have zero tolerance for bad little shit heads who only seem to fuck around. “

“ you need to fuck off, you need to go away. “

“ i don’t wanna talk about it, that’s all that i came to say. “

“ who the fuck do you think you are?! “

“ is this how you want to spend the last few years of your life? “

“ you can be the fucking evil monster. “

“ everything around me felt like a bad dream. “

“ just a little further, one day it will make sense. “

“ who am i if i can’t assign a name and place to what this is? “

“ everything that’s mine feels rotten from the touch of it. “

“ who the fuck are you? stay the fuck away from me! “

“ i want to love myself but memories are killing me. “

“ i want to live but all the years that came before wont let me be. “

“ i could make peace with what i’m not. “

“ i could be real again someday. “

“ i don’t really know why i see rotten things inside myself. “

“ i don’t really understand a single thing that’s said to me. “

“ i’m just a pain that hurts too much. “

“ i’ll get away and i’ll be all that i dreamed of. “

“ i’ll become everything that you were so scared i would be. “

“ you’ll never see me again. “

“ this anger burns out too quick to hold. “

“ am i a character in some sick fantasy that’s getting old? “

“ what happens from now on if it turns out i never told you? “

“ i want to start again, i want this hurt to die. “

“ i want it to destroy me so i’ll have a reason not to lie. “

“ i want to hear your voice and tell you it’s the last time ever. “

“ i want to cut away; i want to separate and sever. “

“ listen, i don’t want to go here. “

“ this is almost as bad as going back there. “

“ this is a wound and it’s closing. “

“ please don’t try to love me. “

“ i don’t even feel like those memories are mine anymore. “

“ i don’t know your motive but i just want to get out of this mess. “

“ i remember trusting you, but now that’s something i don’t think that i could ever do. “

“ the truth is i don’t want to know what happened to me. “

“ all of us had someone like you to run from. “

“ i wish it was easier to hate you. “

“ i wish you were a bad person, but instead i just think that i am for wanting that. “

“ i wish you knew what you did, but i don’t want to tell you. “

“ it would be easier if you were something i had nightmares about instead of ugly, complicated dreams. “

“ please don’t look for me. i promise i’m okay. please go. “

“ it’s not my fault that my soul is a war. “

“ i blame you. but i don’t want to hate you …but maybe that’s because i’m afraid to. “

“ what comes next? is there anything after? where will we go to now? who will we become? “

“ i wonder. i’ve never wondered before. “

“ everything always changes but its always the same. “

[archdivine]

WASTEISOLATION by the blackdresses sentence starters.

“ you’ll never find a way out. “

“ someday you won’t recognize me. “

“ someday you won’t even know who i am. “

“ it doesn’t matter, even if i get it wrong. “

“ sometimes i think that i’m dreaming. sometimes i know that i’m not. “

“ i think i fear you. “

“ i know you’re scared of me, so i’m scared too. “

“ the difference is… i don’t want to kill you. “

“ i live in sickness. “

“ feels kinda like my soul is burnt. “

“ this shit’s too evil to be stylish. “

“ i want to crush you with my jaws. “

“ i don’t feel like i can be anything more than this. “

“ i just want to be whatever you want me to be. “

“ i don’t want to have a soul. “

“ i don’t know what i am but i want you to show me. “

“ i don’t want to have the capacity to feel lonely. “

“ i want you to destroy me so i’ll feel better. “

“ i want to go to hell together. “

“ tell me how to feel. “

“ i don’t know what’s real. “

“ i want to replace myself with the best parts of you. “

“ i don’t want to be anything close to what i knew. “

“ i want to empty out my mind and make it something i can use. “

“ i want to burn away my childhood and scatter something new. “

“ it doesn’t matter if i die. “

“ is there any truth to what you tell me you know about me? “

“ i am not like you. “

“ i want to forget myself and be lied to. “

“ i don’t know if anything’s right, i’m just a girl who can’t look herself in the eye. “

“ it’s the fucking worst, isn’t it? it’s so fucking cursed, isn’t it? “

“ i don’t fucking want to hurt anyone. “

“ i just want to feel anything before i’m done. “

“ you cannot pretend to be close with me. “

“ i burn so fucking bright but your eyesight only sees ashes. “

“ look in my eyes and see the person you damaged. “

“ i run away but they keep following. “

“ what did i do to incur a body that just screams, and dies, and hurts? “

“ i feel like a kind of human curse. “

“ i know i don’t belong, but i have nowhere else to stay. “

“ i’m so sorry i’m here. please don’t kill me. “

“ if i was a killer, i’d kill me too. “

“ i don’t want anything, i just want to survive. “

“ i know i’m nothing to you, i know i’m not even alive. “

“ i’m sorry that i scare you. “

“ i know you’re something different. “

“ you can’t hide it, you can’t miss it. “

“ sometimes i think i’m dead. “

“ i feel like someone else. “

“ i don’t know where i’ve been and i’m scared to ask. “

“ i have zero tolerance for bad little shit heads who only seem to fuck around. “

“ you need to fuck off, you need to go away. “

“ i don’t wanna talk about it, that’s all that i came to say. “

“ who the fuck do you think you are?! “

“ is this how you want to spend the last few years of your life? “

“ you can be the fucking evil monster. “

“ everything around me felt like a bad dream. “

“ just a little further, one day it will make sense. “

“ who am i if i can’t assign a name and place to what this is? “

“ everything that’s mine feels rotten from the touch of it. “

“ who the fuck are you? stay the fuck away from me! “

“ i want to love myself but memories are killing me. “

“ i want to live but all the years that came before wont let me be. “

“ i could make peace with what i’m not. “

“ i could be real again someday. “

“ i don’t really know why i see rotten things inside myself. “

“ i don’t really understand a single thing that’s said to me. “

“ i’m just a pain that hurts too much. “

“ i’ll get away and i’ll be all that i dreamed of. “

“ i’ll become everything that you were so scared i would be. “

“ you’ll never see me again. “

“ this anger burns out too quick to hold. “

“ am i a character in some sick fantasy that’s getting old? “

“ what happens from now on if it turns out i never told you? “

“ i want to start again, i want this hurt to die. “

“ i want it to destroy me so i’ll have a reason not to lie. “

“ i want to hear your voice and tell you it’s the last time ever. “

“ i want to cut away; i want to separate and sever. “

“ listen, i don’t want to go here. “

“ this is almost as bad as going back there. “

“ this is a wound and it’s closing. “

“ please don’t try to love me. “

“ i don’t even feel like those memories are mine anymore. “

“ i don’t know your motive but i just want to get out of this mess. “

“ i remember trusting you, but now that’s something i don’t think that i could ever do. “

“ the truth is i don’t want to know what happened to me. “

“ all of us had someone like you to run from. “

“ i wish it was easier to hate you. “

“ i wish you were a bad person, but instead i just think that i am for wanting that. “

“ i wish you knew what you did, but i don’t want to tell you. “

“ it would be easier if you were something i had nightmares about instead of ugly, complicated dreams. “

“ please don’t look for me. i promise i’m okay. please go. “

“ it’s not my fault that my soul is a war. “

“ i blame you. but i don’t want to hate you …but maybe that’s because i’m afraid to. “

“ what comes next? is there anything after? where will we go to now? who will we become? “

“ i wonder. i’ve never wondered before. “

“ everything always changes but its always the same. “

[archdivine]

this is being regularly updated, please educate yourselves and do your best to help movements across the world 💖

[archdivine]

ok thats a solid amount of work im going to go listen to a guiding force which has never steered me towards the wrong aesthetic path, nadiya, and get the pathologic game

[archdivine]

book meme / misc. stories, jacqueline woodson content warning for blood and violence.

from the notebooks of melanin sun

here i am. alive.

this is all anybody needs to be happy.

you planning on staying awhile?

don’t keep me hanging.

and you’re important to me.

the world doesn’t work that way.

and when i can’t speak it, i write it down.

it feels right and whole and good.

don’t even try it.

there’ll be a hundred names for him. but he’ll know who he is.

just to let us know we’re still alive.

i’ll get it.

the bad kind.

i don’t believe you.

this is the last one.

you just don’t want it to happen, that’s all.

boy, i’ll go upside your head so hard you gonna wish you was never born.

i wish it didn’t matter so much. but it does, doesn’t it?

these are my notebooks. my stories.

it’s like that in our house.

what do you mean, what’s up with that?

so i keep quiet. 

what time is it?

i want to do the right thing.

i wish i was different.

i’m on the outside of things.

sometimes, i don’t have words. 

miracle’s boys

you ready?

i almost said, too.

feels like being a stranger in your own house, like everything that used to mean something doesn’t anymore. even your own name.

they don’t mess with me, i don’t mess with them.

you don’t know nothing about me, little boy.

if i was real quiet, it was like i was invisible.

no you. no more.

what’s wrong with you, man?

what made you cold?

nobody in this room talking to you. you hear anybody call your name?

that’s why i’m here asking you.

then you had to go and open your fat mouth.

like a clock ticking away somebody’s life.

reddest blood i’d ever seen in my life.

i know he didn’t kill anybody.

if they’re fast enough.

that’s cold, man.

blow somebody’s head off.

that’s what you think, stupid.

locomotion

i used to talk all the time.

you’ll sleep in here.

i felt safe then.

where’s that boy i used to know, the one who couldn’t be quiet?

and then i leave fast.

that ain’t right.

but i was just a little kid and nobody else was around.

you need to laugh sometimes.

some days, like today and yesterday and probably tomorrow, that’s all that’s on my mind.

and my voice got quieter. and quieter. and quiet.

this ain’t much, but it’s all i have.

the monsters that come at night don’t breathe fire, have two heads or long claws.

but i don’t.

last night this commercial came on tv.

i look at my knuckles.

sometimes i sit counting the stars.

the kind of crying where no tears came out.

i mean, we’re not supposed to want to.

[archdivine]

so it’s confirmed that buddy, a summer employee of the studio, is the one who was killed and resurrected to become the boris that ends up helping henry in the game, and by that logic, i have a feeling susie was used for alice, probably early on. not TOTALLY ... sure how it would have worked in consideration of when bendy, who is the first creation of the ink machine, would have been made... i don’t think he’s made already when she leaves the studio... but i have thoughts... we’ll see in august i suppose hehe

[archdivine]

HOLLYWOOD (2020) LAURA HARRIER AS CAMILLE WASHINGTON

[archdivine]

i.     ORIGINS ;           SUSIE.

          𝖠𝖭𝖦𝖤𝖫𝖠𝖭𝖦𝖤𝖫𝖠𝖭𝖦𝖤𝖫𝖠𝖭𝖦𝖤𝖫𝖠𝖭𝖦𝖤𝖫𝖠𝖭𝖦𝖤𝖫𝖠𝖭𝖦𝖤𝖫𝖠𝖭𝖦𝖤𝖫 A  BALLAD  OF  SUSIE  CAMPBELL,       𝙳𝙰𝚁𝙻𝙸𝙽𝙶  𝙾𝙵  𝚃𝙷𝙴  𝚂𝚃𝚄𝙳𝙸𝙾.   

          the  original  angel,    susie  campbell,   was  initiated  into  the  halls  that  would  become  her  ultimate  purgatory   in  the  fall  of  1932.   to  begin  with,   it  was  just  a  job.   a  solid  one  at  that  which  replaced  her  less  frequent  and  more  volatile  work  in  the  theater  that  she’d  been  surviving  on  prior,  but  it  still  pulled  nothing  of  substance  to  fruition.  she  was  voicing  talking  chairs,   dancing  chickens.  but  she  remained  so  brilliantly  optimistic,  despite  the  status  quo  she’d  become  used  to,   which  had  confirmed  for  her  that  no  matter  what  she  did,   how  good  she  was,   she  would  never  be  taken  seriously.   she’d  only  be   a  voice  in  the  midst  of  thousands.   it  took  everything  she  had  to  subdue  the   part  of  her  that  believed  that.   she  was  going  to  be  something.   really,  seriously,   be  something.    the  world  would  know  her  name.

          when  the  part  of  alice  angel  was  brought  up,   susie  immediately  felt  drawn  to  it.   she  fell  into  the  role  like  a  natural.   a  lot  of  people  said  the  way  she  sunk  right  into  it  was  near  magical . . .    𝚊  𝚝𝚛𝚊𝚗𝚜𝚏𝚘𝚛𝚖𝚊𝚝𝚒𝚘𝚗.  it  began  to  show  in  doses,   the  cutting  edge  she  took  on  in  her  voice  off  duty.   the   way   she   now   refused   to   settle.   the  big  break  she’d  been  dreaming  of  since  she  was  a  little  girl  was  here,  and  nothing  could  take  the  thrill  out  of  it.    

         the  change  in  attitude  made  some  people  believe  her  to  be  less  of  the  girl  next  door  she’d  originally  positioned  herself  as.   the  comments  made  in  passing  were  no  longer  tolerated,   those  biting  things  at  the  teeth  of  dogs  in  the  workplace   ––    she  took  herself  seriously,   and  by  her  confident  stance,  she  demanded  that  of  others  as  well.   she  seemed  to  her  coworkers  to  take  on  a  more  threatening  role,  by  way  of  her  now  claiming  and  celebrating  her  own  agency.   the  only  one  not  to  react  poorly  to  her  newfound  concrete  footing  seemed  to  be  joey  drew  himself.   she  never  met  with  him  very  much.   didn’t  know  him  well,   but  she  did  retain  a  steadfast  admiration  that  had  been  fostered  since  her  being  hired.  those  sparse  moments  in  his  presence  set  her  stomach  fluttering.  she  thought  horrifically  highly  of  him.

        as  the  world  changed,   and  mr.  drew’s  spending  got  the  studio  into  a  bit  of  a  financial  hole,   susie  tried  to  ignore  it.   as  long  as  she  was  getting  paid,  she  couldn’t  care  much,   and  her  passion  for  alice  angel  hadn’t  been  diminished  by  a  single  minute  of  her  time  there.  in  the  middle  of  all  this  strife,   joey  drew  asked  susie  out  to  dinner.  proved  a  total  charmer,   exactly  the  gentleman  of  her  daydreams.   and  he  called  her  alice.  

“ HE CALLED ME ALICE. ”

        to  find  herself  wooed  by  the  head  of  the  studio  was  the  mistake  to lead  to  her  downfall.   his  interest  in  her,  which  edged  too  close  . . .    too  saccharine . . .  only  grew  from  that  meeting,   but  paired  with  a  strange  withdrawal  from  others  in  the  studio.   sammy  in  particular  seemed  to  draw  away  from  susie  now,   but  her  excitement  in  joey  drew’s  notice  overwhelmed  her  observance  of  oddities.   she  was  left  vulnerable,   not  even  realizing  it,   walking  right  into  the  net  which  would  ensnare  her,   a  trap  set  by  joey  drew’s  own  hand.

        the  idolization  of  drew  is  what  blinded  susie  to  the  reality  of  her  predicament,  though  to  her  credit,  it  was  not  well  known  to  anyone  to  future  plans  of  the  sporadic  and  childish  joey  drew.   without  notice,   coming  into  the  studio  one  day,   susie  found  herself  suddenly  replaced.   another  girl  stood  at  her  microphone,  poised  with  her  script.   when  she  asked  sammy  what  was  going  on,   his  sheepish  response  only  sent  her  straight  to  joey  drew’s  office  to  demand  an  answer  for  what  exactly  was  this  man  trying  to  pull.

       the  blooming  starlet  of  the  animated  world  was  last  seen  by  the  crew  of  the  studio  storming  towards  joey’s  private  office.   no  one  made  particular  notice  of  her  leaving,  as  the  transition  to  the  new  girl,   allison,   was  seamless.  few  people  held  suspicions  or  concerns  over  the  girl,  susie  campbell,  who  outstayed  her  welcome  in  the  spotlight,   and  was  getting  a  little  too  frigid  for  everyone’s  liking.

       no  one  seemed  to  care  that  susie’s  mother  kept  calling  the  studio.   no  one  gave  voice  to  the  question :

              WHAT HAPPENED TO SUSIE CAMPBELL?

[archdivine]

tempted to just allow metas to be big regular text i feel like we’ve progressed past the need for small text

[archdivine]

⊱ 𝚂𝚃𝙰𝚁𝚁𝙸𝙽𝙶 :     𝐓𝐀𝐆𝐒.       [     ❝  character  specific.

[archdivine]

essentially there will be three main characters on this blog (pending more if i decide to do some versions that i haven’t actually met myself in the game yet only read about ksjhdf) which are susie campbell, the main human version of alice i’ll be exploring, twisted alice, the entity which is horrific and monstrous, and an amalgamation of the character/susie/the ink, and allison pendle, who is the secondary human form of alice

[archdivine]

Humoresque (1946) dir. Jean Negulesco

[archdivine]

angel

[archdivine]

book meme / misc. stories, jacqueline woodson content warning for blood and violence.

from the notebooks of melanin sun

here i am. alive.

this is all anybody needs to be happy.

you planning on staying awhile?

don’t keep me hanging.

and you’re important to me.

the world doesn’t work that way.

and when i can’t speak it, i write it down.

it feels right and whole and good.

don’t even try it.

there’ll be a hundred names for him. but he’ll know who he is.

just to let us know we’re still alive.

i’ll get it.

the bad kind.

i don’t believe you.

this is the last one.

you just don’t want it to happen, that’s all.

boy, i’ll go upside your head so hard you gonna wish you was never born.

i wish it didn’t matter so much. but it does, doesn’t it?

these are my notebooks. my stories.

it’s like that in our house.

what do you mean, what’s up with that?

so i keep quiet. 

what time is it?

i want to do the right thing.

i wish i was different.

i’m on the outside of things.

sometimes, i don’t have words. 

miracle’s boys

you ready?

i almost said, too.

feels like being a stranger in your own house, like everything that used to mean something doesn’t anymore. even your own name.

they don’t mess with me, i don’t mess with them.

you don’t know nothing about me, little boy.

if i was real quiet, it was like i was invisible.

no you. no more.

what’s wrong with you, man?

what made you cold?

nobody in this room talking to you. you hear anybody call your name?

that’s why i’m here asking you.

then you had to go and open your fat mouth.

like a clock ticking away somebody’s life.

reddest blood i’d ever seen in my life.

i know he didn’t kill anybody.

if they’re fast enough.

that’s cold, man.

blow somebody’s head off.

that’s what you think, stupid.

locomotion

i used to talk all the time.

you’ll sleep in here.

i felt safe then.

where’s that boy i used to know, the one who couldn’t be quiet?

and then i leave fast.

that ain’t right.

but i was just a little kid and nobody else was around.

you need to laugh sometimes.

some days, like today and yesterday and probably tomorrow, that’s all that’s on my mind.

and my voice got quieter. and quieter. and quiet.

this ain’t much, but it’s all i have.

the monsters that come at night don’t breathe fire, have two heads or long claws.

but i don’t.

last night this commercial came on tv.

i look at my knuckles.

sometimes i sit counting the stars.

the kind of crying where no tears came out.

i mean, we’re not supposed to want to.

[archdivine]

Our mother Jenny Slate

[archdivine]

𝚀𝚄𝙸𝚃𝙴  𝙰  𝙶𝙰𝙻 .        ––           private  writing  blog  for  alice  angel  of  batim.   personals  please  don’t  r/b,  thank  you!    by   róisín.