arealvadim

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Its July 10th

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illumi being helpful : )

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I absolutely love your style of art and all your hisoilllu posts. Hope you have a good night 🖤

Waaah thank you guys!! I’m glad you’re enjoying my stuff, even though I’m late to the party! I only have a sticky note doodle of them to offer right now though…

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still makes me lose my mind whenever there’s promotional hxh images where it’s the main four but hisoka is also just, there. he always looks so out of place lol, the 1999 images are especially funny

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The iron hand of Götz von Berlichingen (1480-1562), a knight and mercenary who lost his right arm in a siege [640×360]

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hisoillu week day 4: love languages

@illumiszoldycks

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Just wanted to tell you that I love your blog and headcanons! It's all so beautifully self indulgent yet still in character. I saw on your Hisoka hugging headcanons that you had thoughts on him wanting to form bonds and being unable to - would you be willing to share? 🖤 Thank you and have a great day!

Manga spoilers up ahead!!

Hisoka is an interesting character in the way he is portrayed. In contrast to Illumi’s tragic life story and Chrollo’s quest for self identity, Hisoka is possibly the most complete in terms of self actualization. He is completely aware of the type of person he is, unlike Illumi who denies the most basic of truths, and is satisfied with who he is, unlike Chrollo who is searching for a meaning greater than him. But, the main difference that separates him from the other two is that Hisoka is completely, and utterly alone.

When you think of scenes with Hisoka, what always strikes me is how I see him as a singular force. You never associate him and his plans with anyone else. It’s mostly him scheming or planning ahead by himself. Or if he were part of a group, always someways away from everyone else, as if he too is aware of the barrier that exists between him and the rest of the world.

Note how based on how the troupe is facing, you can see how Hisoka is sitting some ways off away from them. I doubt they would actively avoid him, and he positions himself away from them instead.

He doesn’t have a group to call his, or friends to rely on. He has an interesting relationship with Illumi where they both behave like partners in crime, but the truth is that the only reason why this relationship is capable of working is because Illumi himself is so far out of it. Illumi is so removed from the semblance of normalcy and basic understanding of how the average man functions that he assumes that whatever relationship he has with Hisoka is normal.

If you really sit and think about it, Hisoka doesn’t need to interact in such a way with people. He could just keep to himself and reduce all interactions with others. But he doesn’t. He purposefully seeks people out, and just because he is who he is, their interactions never go well.

And you can see this clearly whenever Hisoka interacts with other characters. While we have obvious interactions like with Gon and Killua, I think his interactions with the Phantom Troupe really solidifies the type of person he is. They’re a gang of misfits from Meteor City, and even they can’t accept him for who he is. Multiple times through the series do members like Nobunaga, Feitan and Uvogin express their dislike for Hisoka, and if people from a literal trash town who will accept anything think there’s something wrong with you, you definitely have a screw loose.

Coupled with his high intellect and immaturity, this creates a strange superiority complex where he believes himself to be better than everyone as an explanation to them not understanding him. I cannot say which came first, the exclusion or the sense of superiority, but either way they feed into each other and create a difficult cycle to break from. It’s a very childish mentality, something Hisoka just never grew out of it.

But he still wants to have relationships with people, no matter how small or insignificant it seems. What’s interesting is that in psychology, overall well-being which very simply measures “levels of happiness” is most heavily influenced by the quality of relationships we have. There’re multiple studies that show how positive relationships, which is described as relationships filled with care and support as well as promoting one’s sense of value, is the strongest predictor for our well-being, and highly influenced mortality rates, protection against mental illnesses and overall physical health. This is regardless of whether one is introverted or extroverted. So no matter how much one tries to deny it, it’s very human to want to maintain and forge these relationships.

Which we can see Hisoka trying over, and over again.

With Machi.

With Kurapika.

And of course, with Gon.

And each time, he’s attempts at forming what he deems normal conversations are rejected.

And it’s very interesting to see how he interacts with Gon. While one can argue that this is for the sole purpose of preparing him as the ultimate opponent ever, you can also argue that this is done to make Gon indebted to him, or simply put, some as a favor. This is seen in Heaven’s arena, where he warns both Killua and Gon of what is to come on the 200 floor.

And this is even in situations where he doesn’t need to do it. Like in Greed Island.

He tries to explain things to Gon when he doesn’t need to. There’s no need for him to teach Gon about the situation seeing how he would have just learned it from Bisky, Killua or even Tsezguerra. But thing is, he wanted to.

Or even the dodgeball game, where he breaks all his fingers to let Gon have the type of victory he wanted over Razor. Even if his efforts aren’t appreciated, even if he’s just seen as a glory hog at the end.

But he does so anyway. He wants to feel included, he wants to have friends, to have a group of people he can rely on, whether he actually fully realizes this or not.

The problem is that he doesn’t know how to create such bonds.

And this sense of loneliness manifest itself in the only way Hisoka knows to express his feelings: by fighting.

To him, fighting is like a conversation, a way for him to understand people and talk to them as equals, where your only judge is your strength.

Hisoka has developed into an adult that is incapable to forming genuine relationships with people because he is ultimately a self-serving two face snake. His actions kill Pakunoda (indirectly) and Shalnark (directly)

I’m not saying that his actions are justified. But when you combine an inflated ego, sense of entitlement and desire for acknowledgement, and roll them all together into a walking killing machine, you create a very deadly person who is indiscriminate in his actions.

Hisoka wants to form bonds, he craves that sense of acknowledgement that others have, which is why I believe he’s so enamored by Gon and Killua’s relationship. He wants that for himself. They’s a video here which describes Hisoka as what Gon could have been if he had no morals, and they’re fundamentally right. Setting aside characteristics, both characters have a single minded focus and are inherently selfish; Hisoka was willing to jeopardize the whole troupe by working with Kurapika in order to fight Chrollo, while Gon was willing to sacrifice his own arms and the plan he, Bisky and Killua made in order to fight Genthru on his own terms.

The only difference is that Gon is still a child, he’s 14 at this point in the manga and is capable of changing and growing. We don’t officially know how old Hisoka is, but he’s an adult and based on the type of person he is, he isn’t the type to engage in self growth. It’s hard to tell if Hisoka realizes his need for forming relationships with others in his life. He believes he has everything figured out, and knows the type of person he is; but unless he can openly acknowledge his need for acknowledgement from others, deflate his ego, and learn to care for others beyond selfish means, I don’t think he’ll be capable of receiving that sense of belonging he’s searching for.

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.｡.:*･ hisoka icons ･*:.｡.

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© on twitter @mewseok

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hmm tiny

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- See!? Even he thinks it’s stupid!!

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Once geralt gets a little comfortable, by the fire on a crisp spring night, with a bottle of wine by their side, he lets up a little. Jaskier learns this, that geralt becomes less afraid of making a fool of himself. He’ll ask jaskier tentative questions, point at his notebook. What is that then? And Jaskier tries so hard not to smile, afraid of scaring geralt off. ‘That’s a quarter note,’ he’ll say. And geralt will nod and try not to move his lips as he counts the notes in a measure, his cogs turning. He’s so smart. Jaskier will allow a little smile.

Geralt becomes curious. He’s a big nerd, Jaskier knows, so it’s only natural that he wants to know about music. He doesn’t want to play, he leaves it to Jaskier, but he might sit a bit closer on some nights, a distinct blush on his cheeks as he asks Jaskier if he could, if he wanted, play this one tune geralt heard a while ago. If he knows it. And Jaskier gets him to stumblingly describe the words or to brokenly hum a melody until he recognizes the song. And then jaksier plays it and geralt watches him, his face and his fingers, that blush still present on his cheeks. Once he’s finished, he’ll bump his shoulders with Jaskier, whisper a thank you, looking down.

Jaskier stays up long into the night on such evenings, thinking about how deeply emotional those songs are. How touching. About how geralt feels so ashamed of liking such things. And Jaskier notes the songs down, plays them as often as possible. He writes the music down, too, so geralt can look. If he finds the courage in the morning, he talks about the metaphors he liked in the lyrics. About the smart composition. He invites geralt into that conversation. ‘Do you like the imagery of the fountain?’ he prods. ‘See this chord progression here? It’s so beautiful, let me play it for you.’

Geralt seems happy to see Jaskier enjoy the songs. He hums responses to his musings, smirks sometimes, when it’s obvious that that particular song didn’t catch Jaskier’s fancy quite that much. But Jaskier never gets him to say what it is that draws him to those songs in particular. Is it the minor key? But not all are written in it. Some are less sombre, more silly, celebratory. Some were probably meant to be accompanied by a different instrument altogether. Do all these different songs truly just resonate with geralt randomly? Certainly not all people hold a music degree. Some just hear a good tune and go with it.

But it does weigh on him, just a little bit. Until the night when geralt shifts closer again, cheeks utterly red, eyes averted. And he says, ‘why don’t you play that one. The one from posada.’ And they’ve been to posada many times and so Jaskier stares, because geralt knows this but—Oh. The one he played That time in posada. And he barely remembers. But he does deliver, songs the terrible improv piece he did that time. He repeats it a couple more times than necessary, brain working overtime trying to think of what to do with the silence that will inevitably follow. This means something, doesn’t it?

So he chooses one of the songs geralt likes and smoothly shifts into it. It’s easy, he learned it at oxenfurt, actually, could play it in his sleep. It was an exercise they did in the first year, simple, but soothing.

‘You played this the first time you washed my hair,’ geralt says beside him. And Jaskier freezes. The answer to his questions nearly knocks him to the ground. Geralt likes them because of memories.

Jaskier plays another one and hears geralt snort. He’s staring at his fingers on the strings, not daring look up. ‘The time we got drunk and I robbed your classmates of their best gwent cards, in that old tavern?’

He plays another one. ‘The second week of travelling together, you got us a room, you called me your friend to the barkeep,’ geralt rasps. Jaskier can’t look at him. He puts the lite down, making it complete silence. His thoughts are whirring with melodies. Something calm, something sweet.

He picks the lite back up again. Strums a couple chords, changes his mind. Plucks a little melody. His heart won’t stop beating.

‘Jaskier?’ Geralt sounds terrified, ‘what are you doing?’ And Jaskier plays a little something, completely fresh, but the idea is there, and he looks up at geralt, who looks ready to pack up and flee, and he says, ‘deciding on what to play when I kiss you for the first time.’

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Here’s a hot take: villains should be relatable.

Not every villain, not every time, and certainly not to everyone at once, but there should be moments. We should, occasionally, be able to see ourselves in the bad guys, be able to understand how they got there.

Because it reminds us not to fucking go there.

Antis who get upset about villains having relatable qualities (often couched as being “romanticized” or “woobified”) are people who cannot bear to ever think of themselves as having the capability of being wrong.

Every human alive is capable of being a horrible person. Relatable villains remind us to keep an eye on that shit.

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hisoka and illumi aren’t invited to the cool kids club

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he’s literally rigging the election and next to nothing’s being done about it what the actual fucking living hell

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he will be fine

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not to be dramatic but i would die for this cat