arivdnee

[arivdnee]

Any favourite Irish headcanons for Seamus? 😊

thank you very much for the ask, anon!

and i'm sorry to say that i'm going to be really dull and - before we get into the more insincere headcanons i have for seamus - say that figuring out his role in the series depends on the answer to a really important question which neither the books nor [to my knowledge] jkr's post-series writing addresses:

is wizarding ireland a colony?

as someone who's fond of seeing the series through the lens of anglo-irish history, this preoccupies me a lot - and i think it's something very interesting to unravel...

the statute of secrecy - the law which brings about the separation of the magical and muggle worlds - was first instituted in 1689 and put fully into effect in 1692.

it's clear from the tone of the extra-canonical material these dates come from [and since the statute of secrecy is a fairly significant sub-theme of the fantastic beasts films] that jkr landed on these dates for the statute primarily by thinking about the history of witchcraft in early-modern america - the salem witch trials, for example, take place in 1692-1693.

[witch trials weren't an exclusively american phenomenon, of course, but they'd begun to fade out in early-modern europe by c.1650, which is roughly when they begin to become more widely-documented in the american colonies. it's also fair to say that the pop-culture image of witch trials, even in europe, is heavily influenced by their american manifestation.]

but selecting this american context to situate the statute within means that - apparently by accident - it's also a document which appears into the lives of british and irish wizards during an extremely bloody time in anglo-irish history...

a detour which has nothing to do with harry potter...

the sixteenth and seventeenth centuries were the main period of british colonial expansion in ireland - the early seventeenth century is, for example, the period of the plantation [that is, the settler colonisation] of ulster [what is now roughly northern ireland].

as with many other points in the anglo-irish relationship, there was a major sectarian aspect to the british treatment of the irish.

the plantation was driven by protestant settlers from scotland [which is not and has never been a colony!] and england into northern ireland. the protestant population expanded rapidly in the seventeenth century, and political authority in the subordinate irish parliament was largely in the hands of protestant elites [especially clerics connected to the protestant church of ireland] who enacted the policies of the british parliament and the crown. the catholic population was subject to land confiscations, restriction of worship, and an expectation of anglicisation.

and in march of 1689 - the year the statute of secrecy was first signed - this all... rather kicked off.

in november 1688 - in an event known as the glorious revolution - the king of britain [and ireland!], james ii, was forced from the throne.

among the reasons for this [many of which were to do with james' absolutist views of monarchy, which was incompatible with the way the anglo-scottish aristocracy understood itself] was the fact that james was a roman catholic, and that the birth of his son james [iii, the old pretender] in june 1688 had displaced james ii's protestant daughters mary and anne in the line of succession and would result in a catholic dynasty on the throne.

this was unpopular.

so james was chased off and the throne was offered to william of orange - soon to be william iii - the husband of mary [ii].

in an attempt to regain his throne, james primarily recruited support from among the catholic population of ireland [as well as scotland and france], having promised to reverse many of the more unpopular sixteenth- and seventeenth-century policies imposed upon ireland by the crown. this was intolerable both to british and irish protestants, and william iii had no choice but to land in ireland with an army.

the start of the conflict was bloody but nebulous. the tide turned in favour of william iii and his protestant supporters in july 1690, with the battle of the boyne, a williamite victory.

[and a big day in the social calendar here in northern ireland... for some people...]

the jacobite cause was in shambles, james fled the country, and his supporters were eventually made to formally surrender with the signing of the treaty of limerick in october 1691.

from 1691 to 1800, ireland was a british colonial client state [nominally an autonomous kingdom with its own parliament, in reality controlled by the crown and responsible to the king's cabinet in london] politically dominated by anglo-irish protestant families.

in 1800, this "independent" legislature was abolished and ireland was absorbed into the united kingdom of britain and ireland and governed from westminster via a colonial administration in dublin, which remained dominated by anglo-irish protestants.

this remained the case until the establishment of the republic of ireland in 1922. northern ireland remains a constituent nation of the united kingdom.

and now back to the wizards...

according to the harry potter lexicon [my beloved], jkr attributes the establishment of the statute of secrecy in britain to a delegation of wizards who sought protections for the magical under muggle law from [a post-battle-of-the-boyne?] william iii and mary ii in 1690.

when they failed to get these, the british delegation - along with the representatives from other nations who made up the international confederation of wizards - agreed to the full imposition of the statute, with the main local result of this being the creation of the ministry of magic to govern the magical citizens of britain...

and of ireland?

because something which has always stood out to me - in a way i imagine it has for literally nobody else - is that you can suggest on the basis of a watsonian reading of canon that magical ireland was never partitioned...

"[England] Went down to Transylvania, three hundred and ninety to ten," said Charlie gloomily. "Shocking performance. And Wales lost to Uganda, and Scotland was slaughtered by Luxembourg." [GoF 5] 

charlie is talking about the performance of the uk's constituent nations in the quidditch world cup here. we know - obviously - that ireland are the finalists and eventual champions of the competition.

northern ireland, however, is nowhere to be seen.

it could be that the northern irish quidditch team is as abysmal at international sport as its muggle footballing equivalents and that charlie regarded it as futile to mention it.

it could be that wizarding ireland is a united ireland [slay!].

it could be [and i suspect the doylist explanation is, given the overlap between quidditch and rugby] that - as with rugby, where there's only a single all-ireland national team, rather than separate ones for the republic and northern ireland - there's an all-ireland quidditch team regardless of the actual political borders of the wizarding world.

but it could also be that the minister for magic is ultimately responsible - as the monarch would have been at the time the statute was signed - for the governance of the entirety of ireland [and quidditch comes in clutch for us again here... since the ministry in london contains the headquarters of the "british *and irish* quidditch league"...], with the minister's rule maintained within ireland itself by a client administration which he appoints.

indeed, while i don't buy the idea of a hereditary wizengamot or think that the sacred twenty-eight has any actual power other than the opportunity to influence the minister due to social proximity... it's striking that the name of an anglo-irish noble family appears on it: burke.

jkr has also written about another of the most prominent pureblood families as having been resident in ireland during the seventeenth century: the gaunts.

[it's why lord voldemort like relics so much...]

we also know that the london edition of the daily prophet - which functions as something close to state propaganda - circulates in ireland, because seamus' mother takes it, and that the ministry is unhappy with the tricolour flag being flown ostentatiously by ireland supporters during the quidditch world cup.

it is, then, entirely possible - should an author wish - to imagine that the imposition of the statute at such a key point in anglo-irish history means that the magical ireland of the 1990s remains subject to the british minister, and that it therefore has a very different political and cultural relationship to britain than its muggle cousin.

and i also think that this but one way of thinking more broadly about the wider imperialist vibe which is found in the books: the defence of "civilisation" and the status quo; the fact that so much "wizarding" culture is just posh british stuff; the fact that so many of the historical analogies jkr uses to mirror wizarding history relate to the troubles; the ways in which the smallness and insularity of the wizarding population means that the conditions which enable revolution might not be present in magical communities, etc.

and for us to then think about the ways this might make wizarding history diverge from muggle in the early-modern and modern era: is there a revolution in wizarding russia, or are there still estates staffed by squib serfs? do wizards think they're travelling to istanbul or constantinople? do wizards participate in the "new imperialism" of the late nineteenth century, imposing the same colonial borders upon magical africa and asia as muggles do? what would it be like, if you were muggleborn, entering a world which is not only so culturally and politically different, but geographically different?

which brings us to...

seamus finnigan headcanons

on the basis of name alone - which, of course, doesn't mean everything - seamus appears to be one of the only students of irish extraction [that is, not just the only student who's an irish national, but the only student who's of irish heritage] at hogwarts [orla quirke - sorted in goblet of fire - is the only other one i can think of].

[although it is worth noting that many names which appear to be scottish are also common in ireland - especially in the north. professor mcgonagall has - on the information of the seven-book canon - just as much chance of being an ulster protestant as she does a scot...]

[i have decided on the basis of this that i now think cormac mclaggen is northern irish.]

irish people from all walks of life live, study, and work in britain - and vice versa. but the fact that seamus attends a boarding school with the specific cultural vibe hogwarts has - that is, an institution which is a pastiche of elite, fee-paying british boarding schools and of oxford and cambridge, which directly maintains the class-based status quo which props up the wizarding state since its graduates dominate high-level political and institutional positions, and which has a student body which is strikingly well-heeled - suggests that there are less prestigious wizarding schools in ireland, and that him being sent to hogwarts is the result of a certain anglophilia [and the desire for him to benefit in any future ministry career, in britain or ireland, from an elite british education] on behalf of his parents.

this is not to say that i think seamus is a protestant - i don't, although i do genuinely think that the muggle dad witch mam thing is meant to be a joke suggesting he comes from a mixed marriage [still reasonably scandalous here even in 2024!]

i think he comes from a reasonably posh, anglophile, unionist catholic background, much like many of the real anglo-irish civil servants who were educated at the sort of institutions - especially oxford and cambridge, but also trinity and university college dublin - hogwarts shares a cultural vibe with, who went on to high-level positions in the administration of the empire.

[michael o'dwyer, one of the architects of the amritsar massacre, for example...]

but who gives a shit about class and religion! the more important things to know about seamus:

his go-to chip shop order is - as it should be - a spice bag.

he has - in his life - drunk the odd bottle of football special.

his over-the-top loathing of "pretty-boy diggory" in goblet of fire is an absolutely iconic deflection tactic from the fact he's gay - and deamus is canon.

indeed, he loves dean so much that he has willingly cheered for the england national football team [although he threatened to obliviate anybody dean told about this]. dean, for his part, has got really into hurling.

the closest they come to divorce is when dean won't stop singing galway girl by ed sheeran at him.

one @whinlatter has convinced me of: this is their son.

his confirmation name is florian - the patron saint of protection against fire.

him getting beaten to a pulp by the carrows - and then explaining in great detail how the room of requirement works to harry - is iconic, and is a really under-appreciated aspect of character growth from his doubt over harry's credibility in order of the phoenix.

the derry girl he identifies most strongly with is james - although he tells everyone it's michelle.

he met edele lynch from b*witched once and lost his mind.

he owns a flat cap.

him publicly beefing with his mam in the immediate run-up to dumbledore's funeral is one of the most specifically irish things he ever does and i can't explain why.

him giving harry an "appreciative smirk" after he drops the iconic "there's no need to call me sir, professor" line is the second most irish thing he does. i, once again, cannot explain why. [him winking at harry after he answers snape back in their very first potions lesson also sends me.]

he is the voice behind this iconic video... and, let's be real, his slight capacity for self-aggrandisement and sulking does make him a plausible cork man.

he has never read a single piece of writing by sally rooney - but he lies and says he has for an easy life because she's the only contemporary irish writer anyone in england has heard of.

he did this to harry on his first day in the ministry:

his wand is made of dogwood - which suits the flamboyant and loud.

he's shown in canon to quite like a bit of gossip - him being gassed up by quirrell's claim that he fought a zombie and then gutted when quirrell refuses to actually tell the story always sends me - and i like the idea of him being amazing value in a pub.

he's an only child - but he has at least thirty cousins. and his cousin fergus genuinely never did have another peaceful moment after seamus learned to apparate.

he and lavender went to the yule ball together because both dean and parvati are stupid and didn't see what was right in front of their faces. they split a bottle of archers behind a rose bush and complained about men and it was the best night of their lives.

he runs the shit london guinness twitter account.

his boggart is a banshee because his dad - who is literally only mentioned once in philosopher's stone - dies over the summer before his second year [banshees - in irish folklore - herald the deaths of family members with their weeping]. however - unlike harry - you don't hear him fucking banging on about this all the time...

and he can't speak a word of irish, but none of the posh english lads he knows are going to risk calling him out on that...

[arivdnee]

re:lucius/tonks (lucidora?) yeahh think that'd have to be in an au where he's not married to narcissa. not that she and andromeda wouldn't kill him with hammers even then tbh but there'd be like. fewer hammers. if he's hooking up with his old schoolmate's kid rather than hooking up with his niece-by-marriage.

yeah i think it'd be the end for lucius one way or another no matter the au unless i kill narcissa and andromeda off—either way it will require some major character death

[arivdnee]

Dad bod Lucius?

God YESSS 🔥

It would make sense for him to have more of a dad bod figure when Draco is still growing up as I imagine he lost a lot of weight in Azkaban and through the war and ended up quite bony.

Equally, though, after the war? Enjoying good food again, focussing entirely on himself rather than on how he needs to present himself to others, finding himself after it all comes crashing down? Let’s get that dad bid back, Luci.

In any event - hot af

[arivdnee]

My HP headcanons :

-Lucius Malfoy met Macnair at Hogwarts, as classmates.

-Narcissa's wedding dress had very pale mint green embroidery. She chose her's with a high, stiff neckline decorated with an emrald broach.

i haven't put much thought into macnair himself but maybe i should it'd make for some interesting plots to have lucius malfoy and the ministry's executioner as long time friends 🤔

as for narcissa's wedding dress: extremely yes!!

it's actually very similar to my own headcanon—in mine she had a more medieval style dress (almost off the shoulder, deep-ish neckline, bell sleeves, etc.). it looks quite simple from afar but up close you can see it's very intricately decorated with pale, almost white, green embroidery with gold detailing. for me, lucius is the one with the high neckline and brooch in just the right type of green to match his wife to be

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i cannot stop thinking about lucius/tonks (dora)

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I keep wondering, what if Sirius Black hadn’t found James Potter on that first train ride to Hogwarts?

Instead, the door he slid open revealed not a boy with messy hair and an ego to match, but a quiet, guarded Severus Snape?

Just two boys, neither loved quite right, thrown into the same compartment before the world told them they were meant to be enemies.

Sirius flopped down opposite the first lone figure he saw—black hair, hollow stare, arms crossed as if daring the world to speak first. He grinned. “Hi. You look like you hate everything. I think we’ll get along.” Severus looked up, unimpressed. “You talk too much.” Sirius tilted his head. “And you look like you haven’t smiled since birth.” Smirk met sneer in silence. It wasn’t friendship, yet, but something had clicked. The corner of Sirius’ mouth twitched. “Yeah. We’ll definitely get along.”

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one of my more random lucius headcanons is that he is really into herbology. i have no canon backing or like any reasoning at all. it just feels right. herbology, potions and the dark arts—those were/are his favourite subjects.

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i just think there should be a bit of covert incest going on from bellatrix to narcissa after andromeda ran away

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who smoothed him out??? he looks like a child 😭

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My power over you

Grows stronger yet

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i love the fanarts that depict lucius as buff because wow yummy but i cannot imagine that man ever working out trying to picture it is almost comedic

[arivdnee]

lucius is like, embarrassingly good with animals and small children. he’s that guy who can calm a stranger’s screaming toddler down from a tantrum in the street. when he was a teenager he was the only one of the slytherin prefects whom the first-years liked. the peacocks obey spoken instructions but only from him. he hates it, because it detracts from his scary posh dark wizard image, but on the plus side he can clock sirius’s animagus form on sight because it’s the only dog he’s met in his life that reacts to him by growling at him.

Anon it wasn’t good for my health to read this during my ovulation phase 😩

On a more serious note, the thing I really love about this one is that it makes Lucius approachable. The rest of the time, he has that aura of importance he’s cultivated, and it’s intimidating to most, which he likes because it gives him an added air of power and maybe even danger. But that’s not who he truly is beneath it all, and it’s the only way the cracks begin to show, although it’s mostly just baffling.

Like imagine that scene in Flourish and Blotts with Arthur Weasley, but half way through, someone carries a baby past, and this baby is going nuts to try and get to Lucius, who is equally as drawn to greeting the cute baby, so he just takes a short pause to wave and coo and then smile and throw a compliment at the babies parent before returning to (attempt to) absolutely own Arthur, and the kids are all like 🤔🤨

Pssst I know this one to be true due to that one line in @smilingformoney’s fic where he gives a baby his hand and the baby nibbles on his finger. So. I’m on board

[arivdnee]

ooo harry potter, tom riddle, and a dumbledore all having jet black hair is giving me ideas... i don't have the words for them yet but there's something you could do there

i will gleefully encourage this by noting that the one time tom gets the "jet black" description is when harry sees teenage tom the first time in chamber of secrets. harry notes that tom is older than him and a prefect, but that "he, too, had jet-black hair." meanwhile, neither james nor riddle sr. get this specific description, even though harry and tom both look like their fathers!

kendra seems like an outlier on the list but she's 1) a presumed muggle-born with unspecified rumors about her actual heritage 2) considered "terrifying" by polite pureblood society at the time 3) allegedly the person who taught albus to scheme and keep secrets...

i don't have anything to add (yet) except thank you i love all of this

[arivdnee]

why are the blacks always headcanoned as french? is it fetishisation or something? it doesn't make any sense... what french family would be called ‘black’? it's an english surname. they pride themselves on being the noble and most ancient house of black. i'd bet they were in england before the romans were. if you want french purebloods, both the malfoys and lestranges originate from france canonically.

[arivdnee]

i'm not a lucius malfoy apologist. he did everything and more than he was accused of all of his own free will and what about it? he looked hot doing it too

[arivdnee]

also re: that black fam post "they all have jet-black hair" no they don't tho. narcissa aside, andromeda's expressly in-text a brunette. bellatrix and sirius do have black hair, but they're literally the only ones so-described. walpurga doesn't have a hair color described — her portrait is "an old woman in a black cap." her male relatives in her generation don't get any physical description. regulus isn't even confirmed to have black hair lmao, he's got dark hair in a black-and-white photo and resembles sirius, that's all we get. i do enjoy some wacky inbred pureblood bullshit aus/headcanons, but idk if all the blondes are related to each other was alice longbottom a secret malfoy too?

and actually while i'm being insane, the only human characters that get the "jet-black hair" description are harry, tom riddle, and kendra dumbledore, who has a blue-eyed, red-haired son despite that and despite harry getting the impression she's not white. sirius's dog form gets a "jet-black" description one time in the dark though, so honorable mention I guess.

ted tonks is described having ‘fair hair’, he must be a malfoy too!

but you are right the rest of the post doesn't really hold up either. aside from the statement “all blacks have jet black hair” being incorrect, it's an odd decision to group all blond hair into one while singling out jet black hair specifically to speculate relation. if harry and the blacks both having jet black hair shows a relation, then, by that logic, lucius and draco having silver blond hair while narcissa only has blonde hair shows no relation.

also recessive genes. just. they're a thing that exist.

but anyway, while it's totally fanon, i do like the idea of pureblood families having their own magical ‘quirk’ or feature that signifies their lineage and ooo harry potter, tom riddle, and a dumbledore all having jet black hair is giving me ideas... i don't have the words for them yet but there's something you could do there

[arivdnee]

not going to reblog the post but r.e. recent post in the narcissa malfoy tag about her lineage—i'm a fan of the headcanon/au where narcissa is a malfoy by blood as well as by marriage due to an affair or otherwise. but. what do you mean narcissa “literally threatens harry potter and bellatrix lestrange over talking bad about lucius” malfoy tolerates the man at best???