armorhues

[armorhues]

Tsukutabe is truly something. I've not felt such a connection - and hyperfixation - with a fictional world in over a decade.

For years, I've been fearful of the word "lesbian" and would avoid using it for myself, even though it accurately describes who I am. I'd say: other words fit me better, and I have the power to choose whatever I want. I'd also say: well, words don't really matter, so whatever.

"Lesbian" has not felt comfortable, and at times, felt wrong for me. Sometimes, these stigmas we've internalised can be tough to budge.

For Nomoto and Yako to explicitly and repeatedly call themselves lesbians has been so healing for me. To see Asian women, like me, on-screen owning this word without shame has changed me for the better. It is just a word, and a meaningful one that has helped Nomoto, Kasuga, and Yako understand themselves, each other, and their place in the world better. It's brought them comfort and love and a chosen family. Sayama and Nagumo have been wonderful catalysts for Nomoto and Kasuga's journey to self-discovery.

The idea that the word "lesbian" could one day be part of me as well seems possible now, and not so scary. I mean, I even made a post about the word!

This is one reason - of many, many, so many reasons - for why I've felt such a draw to Tsukutabe.

And of course, thank you to @furritsubs for your thoughtful subtitles and informative notes. Without your hard work, I - and so many other people who don't know Japanese - could not have experienced the treasure that is Tsukutabe.

I would also love to thank the actors, author, screenwriter, and other staff involved in the show directly, but ahhhhhh, I'm too shy. So I'll thank them indirectly here - thank you so much. You have no idea how impactful your work has been for me.

Tsukutabe elevates kindness, sincerity, and living as you are, as honestly as you can. This is what I've needed, and I imagine what others might have needed too.

These characters and their world will stay in my heart forever.

Thank you, Tsukutabe.

[armorhues]

12 years later, only one of the newsroom kids I was with in this moment is still with the subsidiary, two of us (me included) have moved to the mothership, one to another newsroom, one moved on to government and one now based in the Netherlands.

But I still would like to think we're still on our way to calling the shots in the paths we have all chosen to take. And that's perfectly fine: we're all still badasses and revolutionary anyway.

Random thought while we pore over yearbook pages

I see us taking over this world in a few years.

It’s an exciting prospect, the thought of all of us in the group calling the shots and taking responsibility for this world we are in. We could be bad-ass and revolutionary as we set the agenda and become forerunners. I can just feel it.

But it’s scary knowing the road to that moment will be bumpy. Heck, we’ve been having a taste of how that journey will look like in this year alone. We’re not even sure if we’d still be the same people as we are now, nor are we sure all of us will stick around by the time we get there.

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Well hi

Coming back here in case Twitter dies.

Also, lol:

https://t.co/ixbAwSlMkB pic.twitter.com/GSVh3IbZkT

— tumblr dot com the website and app (@tumblr)

November 18, 2022

Jeez, even the embed from Twitter is ugly. It's all Melon's fault.

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Thank you Papa B @BoyetJSison for your generosity, your wisdom, your kindness, your seemingly endless supply of chicharon. You were an awesome colleague and a dependable anchor to this ex-producer. The world feels a little more lonely without you and your hearty laugh. I still can't believe I'm posting this tbh. Parang nasa newsroom ka lang last week Papa B ano na!!!! (2nd 📸: @beejayramos) https://www.instagram.com/p/CcacVZovF6Q/?igshid=NGJjMDIxMWI=

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Naulan (at Mang Larry's Isawan: The Famous Isawan in UP) https://www.instagram.com/chasingrach/p/CYdlk3HvuVP/?utm_medium=tumblr

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July 10, 2021 Still here, same message #DefendPressFreedom #IbalikAngABSCBN (at ABS-CBN Broadcasting Center) https://www.instagram.com/p/CRNqTYtjDNL/?utm_medium=tumblr

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Hey, I got vaccinated and I wrote about it.

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Pancakes for breakfast that need no filter (at Valenzuela City) https://www.instagram.com/p/CMI_qAxBLWU/?igshid=naj00t6bl0d7

[armorhues]

So this happened. Last time this happened was in 2015, also starting with abdominal pain. But Thursday afternoon's abdominal pain was worse that I had to go to the hospital despite my pandemic fears, the pain so bad I couldn't make a prayer from scratch so I ended up reciting Our Father and Hail Mary instead.

By the time we reached the ER, my pain level was at 12 on a scale of 1 to 10. It took a total of three shots of tramadol and a shot of paracetamol for the pain to become reduced to discomfort. After hours of waiting, CT scan results showed I had inflamed lymph nodes on my intestinal lining and a 0.3cm ureter stone. Thankfully, I won't need any other procedure - just pain management, antibiotics and other meds.

Special mention and thanks to my mom who dropped everything in the kitchen to drive us to ER without needing Waze and to my sister who, like in 2015, made sure I'm attended to since the pain rendered me incoherent.

I'm finally admitted by early Friday morning. Hopefully this confinement won't take long, but I will take this brief opportunity to rest and recover.

[armorhues]

First day high 2021

1 January 2021 - a chilly, cloudy morning that reminded me of overcast autumn mornings in Canada back in 2018. I thought it fitting to wear to work the faux leather jacket I bought in a Forever 21 outlet in Quebec (which had long been closed due to bankruptcy). And while the jacket had a few scratches here and there, it looked great for the most part.

And because a good part of my first day of the year usually involves driving, I decided to check out the new route on the block: the Skyway 3 segment that would lead me from NLEX to Quezon Avenue (and quicker, closer to work). It's a toll-free route for the next few weeks anyway; might as well try it out.

Patches of Skyway were narrow and spotty, but it excited me. Construction work for this route had given northerners heavy traffic, so it's nice to see the benefits. It took around 3-5 minutes before landing in Quezon Avenue.

But the joy of driving was replaced with horror. While waiting at a stoplight, I saw my leather jacket has, for the most part, disintegrated. Too embarrassing to wear it outside, to be honest. What a waste, I thought, after keeping it in a cabinet for a year. But then again, what did I expect from fake leather?

⁽ᶜʳᵒᵗᶜʰ ˢʰᵒᵗ ˡᵒˡ⁾

I have this weird belief that whatever happens on the first day of the year provides a glimpse of what could happen for the rest of the year. To be honest, I have not fully proven if that belief is correct. Then again, everything in hindsight is 20/20.

Like who would've thought that the weird T-shirt I saw on my first work day of 2020 would summarize what was to come? The shirt read "FORGET TRUMP REMEMBER EACHOTHER" (sic).

View this post on Instagram

A post shared by Rachel Hermosura (@chasingrach)

Now that I think about it, Americans did forget Trump in the polls, while the pandemic has, for the most part, made us remember each other even as COVID-19 kept us apart.

On the first day of 2021, I saw progress and disintegration. I'm not sure if that's a good assessment or if it sums up what else is coming. Here's to hoping it won't be as bad as the dreary year that just ended.

[armorhues]

Always my favorite photo, also because I took it, heh. I hope you’re happy wherever you are. Miss you always. 💚💚💚💚💚 (at MOA Arena) https://www.instagram.com/p/CI7GNXhh6Ev/?igshid=15ti9gfxyytlo

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Got tired of the long hair (plus mahal ang shampoo ano please lang) so here we are back with that siyete cut. (at Valenzuela City) https://www.instagram.com/p/CFJgScPB0G8/?igshid=du2aq5dpbtt8

[armorhues]

"Don't mind me Tita Rach, I just wanted to check out my chirping friends." -- @noah.goes.arf, maybe #dogsofinstagram #aspinsofinstagram (at Valenzuela City) https://www.instagram.com/p/CEvGrg_BYl0/?igshid=1j238knek8xx5

[armorhues]

I remember receiving this shirt in 2013, back when I was still a writer for the ABS-CBN News Channel. ANC is part of the ABS-CBN family, but technically I'm not employed by ABS-CBN Corporation (this is why we always say we're 11,000 strong, not 4,000 or some other figure). But I digress. When I received this shirt in time for #Halalan2013, I was excited to wear it. Sure, it had a very simple design, but the stitched ABS-CBN News logo turned it into something else. This ABS-CBN News shirt means I'm not just an employee of a subsidiary, not just a sidekick in the newsroom. This ABS-CBN News shirt is a reminder that I am part of ABS-CBN News, a part of a bigger group, a part of a bigger mission to be in the service of the Filipino, not just during election period but every day in the course of our jobs. We may make mistakes along the way but all of what we do is always for the truth and always for the Filipino. Today, our jobs are at stake, our company battered and bruised but not yet totally out. Today, our hearts are heavy, but it only leaves us with no choice but to surrender everything to God. Today, we dread the worse, but we also hope for the best. We hope you can join us in prayer and in the struggle. #LabanKapamilya #VoteYesToABSCBN #IbalikAngABSCBN #DefendPressFreedom ❤️💚💙 (P.S. Second 📸: @dinoponti) (at ABS-CBN News) https://www.instagram.com/p/CCcnEtxhn6G/?igshid=1j7wsiby6klry

[armorhues]

Somewhere in the world, it's still technically your birthday. Happy 3rd barkday, Mr. Sungit! #aspin #aspinsofinstagram #adoptdontshop (at Valenzuela City) https://www.instagram.com/p/B9lEN7qhx7q/?igshid=1l5zy8vzuzcis

[armorhues]

Scenes from Friday night's show of force, show of love, show of support (plus: colleagues doing serious work stuff with Jericho Rosales and a candle vigil hack from my years of Catholic school education). #DefendPressFreedom #NoToABSCBNShutdown #YesToABSCBNFranchiseRenewal (at Sgt. Esguerra Avenue) https://www.instagram.com/p/B81hdM7hFZE/?igshid=mtkproeipkxc

[armorhues]

After years of seeing Jackie in the hospital and petting her almost every time, I finally got to give the good girl a belly rub and she liked it. 11/10 will do it again if she will let me. 🥰🐶🐕💕 (at The Medical City) https://www.instagram.com/p/B8Dqy8rBRSD/?igshid=a9gypmppo72c