artemis-fowl-shitposts - Tumblr blog

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Taipei 101 is THE MOST EVIL building on the planet

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wait how many artemis fowl fans have number five hargreeves icons exactly

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Here’s some beautiful fanart I made of a shielded Holly

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You ever see a movie so poorly written you feel personally affronted

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I know absolutely nothing about umbrella academy except what little I've seen cross my dash and unconsciously absorbed... But seeing that number 5 kid used as the the icon for this blog is killing me. The first time I saw a pic of that kid I immediately thought "wow that's a perfect Artemis Fowl" agfksjsksks

You know it's funny, that was my gut reaction when watching Umbrella Academy, and my dad's after he watched the Artemis Fowl Movie. I think if there's one thing all humans agree on it's that that guy would have made an excellent Artemis Fowl.

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Real talk though I loved the troll fight because it's funny as fuck that Holly was totally ready to go and then just,,, immediately got stuck on a chandelier like same

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My favorite thing about the Artemis Fowl movie is that it was only one hour and twenty minutes long so I didn't have to watch any more of it.

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Pronouncing it "oculus" because I do not care for this movie in the slightest

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I'm not even sure if I want to finish watching this movie. Even if I hadn't read the books, the way this movie is presented is so... Bad

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people who compare artemis and number 5 are soooo funny like artemis can’t run a hundred meters without breaking a sweat, you want to compare him to the guy who took out a diner full of people on his own? if artemis punched even one of them he’d break his wrist.

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I’m making an AF podcast

Alright, I’ve been waiting to do this for a while and I cant hold it in any more. I’m writing a script for an Artemis Fowl dramatized podcast (because F*ck off Disney). I’m about 5 episodes into the series I have plan just focusing upon the first book. I’m also a creative writing student in Falmouth University, so I know how to do this correctly. Would love any support this community could give. YouTube videos will soon follow, I promise

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Artemis Fowl Redid Update

Hi! It’s been a couple days since my previous post about Artemis Fowl Redid, which, just to recap, is a fan-based Artemis Fowl movie wherein each person or group of people contributes to a small part of the movie. Like Shrek Retold. Also, I would just like to reiterate: NO EXPERIENCE OR SKILL IS REQUIRED. You do not have to have done anything like this before, valid art forms include everything from sock puppetry to crayon drawing animatics, please do not exclude yourself because you feel you are not talented enough.

Anyway, since my last post, I’ve done two things: - Started a discord server, so that we can have a central location for updates and further coordination. Most if not all future updates will be posted to the discord, so it’s important that you join. - And created a second survey based on the results of the first one, which I would really appreciate people taking as it would help me better decide how to keep moving forward.

Discord link  Second survey link 

Thank you.

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Artemis Fowl Redid: Again

Hey, it’s me, the guy who wanted to do a fan movie. I figured this project needed more organization and also more input from you guys, the people who are actually going to be doing things. Just to recap:

Artemis Fowl Redid is intended to be a fan project wherein the Artemis Fowl fandom, through animation, live-action filming, and other assorted means of production, works together to create a movie of some sort based on the Artemis Fowl books. Each person involved would volunteer to do a single small part, and we’d then cobble together a reasonably sized video from that. This project, if it takes off, would NOT require those involved to be particularly skilled or experienced, so please don’t exclude yourself because you think we don’t want you. I assure you, we do. And with everyone stuck at home, there’s really no better time to get involved in a fan project. Additionally, I’d like for everyone to take a quick survey so I can know how best to proceed.The survey is here, and I promise it’s short. 

Even if you’re not planning on getting involved, I’d still like your input. If you would like to participate, more information on that will come out probably within the next week, so stay tuned, and make sure to follow this blog if you’d like additional updates on Artemis Fowl: Redid. Also, I hate to ask, but please reblog this post so as many people as possible can see it. 

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A better artemis fowl movie (it’s happening, people)

So we're all aware that the new Artemis Fowl movie is (probably going to be) missing a lot of the stuff that made the books so special. That said, if some of us wanted to make our own, better movie, we probably wouldn't be able to do it on our own, because making a movie requires a lot of time, expertise, and different skill sets.

That's where this comes in: I present, Artemis Fowl Redid (working title).

Shrek Retold was a shot-for-shot remake of Shrek. Shrek fans all over the world signed up to animate or re-enact various scenes from Shrek, collectively re-creating the whole movie including the score. It was an excellent coming-together, and it produced an actual full-length movie.

Artemis Fowl Redid is going to be like that, but a little more serious in tone, although it likely won't be able to be completely serious and will definitely be less "polished" than the official movie. A script will be written that is based almost entirely on the books, and from there, af fans and their friends will sign up for specific parts of the movie to film, animate, voice act, animatic create, stop-motion animate, etc.

This post is to see what you guys think of all this, and also to post the first scene in the script, which is available here. I wrote the script out, but the intellectual property and most of the dialogue belongs to Eoin Colfer. The idea is for us (the af fandom) to make this scene into a movie as a test run/proof-of-concept, and if it works out, to move forward with converting the rest of the book to a movie. So you're probably wondering:

How do I get involved?

I've divided the script into short chunks, which you can see here along with which chunks have and have not already been claimed and in what capacity. To claim one or multiple chunks, dm me here on tumblr with what parts you'd like to do and what you can do (just voice acting? just animation? can you film a scene?), along with any special considerations. You can also dm me if you'd like to help with something else, like editing the script, writing/editing later, composing music, etc. The more the merrier! Also, please note that I've devised the chunks with an eye towards live-action, which means if you're an animator (or just in general) it's fine and encouraged to do multiple. The only real reason the chunks are so small is because I don't want to overwhelm people, and also because the part we're doing atm is so small.

script

spreadsheet

Also, please boost this post, especially if you're an af blog. 

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I know we're all people who read the books and are mad at the way Disney's adapting them, but let's spare a thought for the poor kids who'll like the movie and then want to read the books

I mean I know the books are better but I feel bad for the kids who are gonna go in expecting their "fun loving" Artemis only to get a cold calculating kidnapper who'll do whatever it takes to achieve his goals

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Honestly? It’s good generic kids movie but it’s just not Artemis Fowl.

YES.

they tried to make it family friendly, and the books are just… not. there’s a lot of gray morality in them, because let’s face it, a lot of things in life are morally gray. artemis fowl was about a different kind of escapism than disney is. in disney, everyone is either good or bad. they fight, the good wins.

artemis fowl acknowledges that humans are complicated and do both good and terrible things. it’s not about what you’ve done; it’s what you choose to do next. artemis fowl is escapism to a world where you know the characters will win, not because they’re perfect, moral heroes, but because they’re smart, gritty people trying their best.

and it makes me sad that kids who see the movie are going to miss out on that.

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Yall better not be bullying that kid who plays artemis fowl in the movie