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The Phantom of the Academy (Full)
[Scene: The U.A. Festival Stadium. Students train under staff and Pro-Heros, with Midnight, Present Mic, Uwabami and Death Arms front-and-centre. Nezu enters, leading Shigaraki and Overhaul - the villains have overthrown the government in this alternate world, and these two schmucks have been booted to an administrative job, because not even other villains could endure their company for long. They’re both majorly jelly that Stain got to be head of the Public Safety Hero Commission]
Nezu: Preparations, as you see, are under way for tonight’s opening of the Sports Festival
Present Mic: Nezu, Principal, baby, we’re trying to jam here
Nezu: Present Mic, Midnight, students and staff, may I have your attention. As you know, for some weeks there have been rumours of my imminent retirement. I can now tell you that these are all true, and it is my pleasure to introduce to you the two gentlemen who are now the new principals of U.A. High School. Mr Tomura Shikaraki, and Mr Kai Chisaki. I’ve sure you’ve heard their names in connection to the recent government coup
Shigaraki: We prefer to call it the Great Societal Reform, actually
Overhaul: And we’re deeply honoured, as your new overlords, to welcome our new patron: the Vicomtesse Jiro.
[A dashing-looking Jiro enters, in a form-fitting pants/waistcoat combo. Every student immediately decides that they are now Kyoka-sexual.]
Creati (aside, to Battle Fast): It’s Kyoka. We knew one another as little girls. I guess you could say we were sweethearts. She called me her 3D-Printcess
Battle Fist: Momo, she’s so handsome
Earphone Jack: Under the aegis of our benevolent new government (eyeroll), my parents and I are honoured to support the next generation of heroes, especially those attending the world-renowned U.A. High
Nezu: Gentlemen, Lady Kyoka, may I introduce Uwabami, our leading tournament fighter these past three seasons... and Death Arms, her tag-along.
Earphone Jack: I am honoured (she shakes hands with Uwabami and immediately applies hand sanitizer). Now I believe I’m keeping you from your preparations. I will be here this evening to share in your great triumph.
Present Mic: Thank you Jackie-baby, now once again from the top! [General U.A. Chaos resumes as Jiro leaves, having won everyone’s hearts and loins. Every version of You Say Run plays at once as students train and Midnight takes the new bosses on a tour]
Midnight: We take particular pride in the excellence of our first-years, gentlemen
Overhaul: I can see why, especially that red-headed brawler
Midnight: My protégé, Battle First
Shigaraki: That one next to her looks like another contender for MVP
Midnight: Momo Yaoyorozu, aka. Creati – a promising talent Mr Shigaraki, very promising
Overhaul: You said Yaoyorozu, then is she the heir to the fortune of that family...
Midnight: Their sole beneficiary, orphaned last year, when she came to live and train at U.A. under our recommendations programme.
Shigaraki: An orphan huh? Shame, but Master did say the Yaoyorozu family’s private plane made for a pretty bonfire
Midnight: I consider her like a daughter, creep
[Shigaraki shuts the hell up - being a basement-dwelling gamer, he’s never spoken to a woman before and doesn’t know what to do. Shortly hereafter, the festival preparations are stopped by mysterious blasts of fire and ice that launch from below the stage, nearly injuring Uwabami]
Battle Fist: He’s here, the Phantom of the Academy
Nezu: Uwabami, are you alright (he calls up to the control-box). Power Loader, for pity’s sake what’s going on up there?
Power Loader (answering over the speakers): Please Principal, don’t look at me. I was too busy herding Hatsume and was not at my post. Please sir, there’s no-one there – or if there is, well then, he’s surely a ghost
Overhaul (to Uwabami): These things happen. Get over it.
Uwabami: For the past three years ‘these things’ have happened, and did you stop them Nezu, no! And you two schmucks, you’re as bad as him. ‘These things happen’? Well until you stop these things from happening, this thing (motions to herself) will not happen!
Death Arms: Amatuers!
(Uwabami and Death Arms storm off in a fit. Nezu excuses himself with a grin)
Nezu: Well gentlemen, good luck. If you need me, I shall be in my burrow
Shigaraki: Present Mic, is Uwabami coming back any time soon?
Present Mic: Who can say, that lady’s got four heads and no brains!
(enter Midnight with an envelope)
Midnight: I have a message from the U.A. Ghost
Shigaraki: Master's hands, you're all a bunch of fangirls
Midnight: He welcomes you to his High School-
Overhaul: HIS High School?
Midnight: -he also commands that you continue to leave Box Five in the Stadium empty, for his use, and reminds you that his salary is due
Shigaraki: His salary? WTF?
Midnight: Principal Nezu used to give him eleven million Yen a month
Overhaul: Eleven million Yen?
Midnight: Perhaps you can afford more, with the Vicomtesse Jirou as your patron
Shigaraki: You see Midnight, we had hoped to publicly release that bit of DLC tonight when Jirou was to join us for the Festival, but now we're gonna have to scrub that, since our Player Character just stomped the fuck off!
Overhaul: Easy Tomura, there's gotta be a... a sidekick!
Present Mic: Sidekick? Hey man, there are no sidekicks when it comes to Uwabami!
Overhaul: Alright, we're boned. A full house Tomura, we're gonna have to refund the whole stadium!
Midnight: Momo Yayourozu could fight sir!
Shigaraki: What, a first year n00b? GTFO.
Midnight: This n00b has a great teacher.
Overhaul: Who?
Mom: I don’t know his name sir, just that he wields both fire and ice
Midnight: Let her fight, you bastards. She has been well taught
[Momo kicks ass and takes names. Later that night, Todoroki then takes her away to his Phantom lair deep under the school (he bribed Hatsume to build it). The climax where he and Jiro fight for Momo’s love triggered flame wars that were only resolved with an International Tribunal.]
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The Final Reasoning in full
And there you have it. Mina Ashido wins the 1st Year Gold Medal at the U.A Sports festival.
So, once upon a time…like, three months ago.
When my brother pitched the whole idea of a random draw for the Sports Festival (in the distant past of March 6th, fifteen weeks ago today - look how much the world has changed in that time), we went into it and drew the lots with no predetermined winner in mind. We simply looked at the opening brackets and got to work deciding the outcomes of the first batch of the sixteen fights you’ve been reading during these interesting times.
The first thing we realised (like, really-really-quickly) was that Bakugo was a shoo-in for the final. Izuku was still drinking his bone-breaking juice at this point, and Todoroki would have half-assed it like in canon thanks to his daddy issues. Like many commenters at the outset, we felt only Momo (sorry Ochaco) had a good chance at stopping Bakugo’s run to the gold.
The other side of the bracket however wasn’t so cut-and-dry however. It was only once we finished deciding the outcome of the quarterfinals did we go “Holy shit, can Mina actually win this?” It was like the dawn had suddenly broken over a dark and troubled land, a glorious PINK sunrise! (sailor’s warning, or a warning to a certain hothead who curses like a sailor)
Having already decided that Bakugo would have reduced Izuku to tears, we knew that Mina (with her canon stance on bullying) wouldn’t tolerate it, and suddenly she became a serious contender in our eyes. It also began making further sense when we realised Mina is demonstrably the physically strongest and most agile girl in Class A, thus the perfect candidate to send up (and stand up) against Bakugo.
That said, his quirk was a frightening thing to match the perky Pinky against. We also knew that neither would hold back, and that Mina would have to do something special to win. She has the moves to keep ahead of Bakugo (just look at her tumbling vs. Slice in Heroes Rising), and she has the strength and dexterity to go toe-to-toe with him in a brawl. It's the question of overcoming his quirk that needed to be dealt with.
Then we realised that in writing Ochaco and Momo’s fights with Bakugo we’d established a theme - they’d both neutralised his quirk (or stolen its power). Deciding this made for wonderful poetic justice, we decided to roll with it, and began exploring what acids would do against him. Simple science shows that unfortunately acids wouldn’t have the effects we desired without causing excessive injuries, at which point my brother called me in a gibbering fit of excitement.
“BROTHER! Mina secretes something slippery from her feet! Slipperiness is a quality associated with bases, not acids!”
“And that means?” “Mild bases can react with nitroglycerine and neutralise it!” “Holy shit!”
So yeah, we decided to go to the other end of the (pH) scale. Mina has canonically been stated to be capable of controlling the pH of her secretions, and anything with a Ph higher than 7 is basic in nature. For a more detailed exploration you’ll have to wait until next Monday’s drabble, but the key takeaway was that we had a means to the ends we wanted, and that Bakugo got his desired fight with half-n’-half, but instead of Fire and Ice, he got Acid and Base.
With that outcome in mind there were other factors to consider. Mina’s “quirkless” and “Kacchan” taunts were from her putting two and two together (she’s academically challenged, but is a savant at social algebra). Bakugo has raged about Izuku’s 'supposed’ quirklessness in class and Izuku has ‘declared’ himself as a ‘late bloomer’ so Mina in her bully hunt mode realised this was the foundation of Bakugo’s reign of torment, and used it to get revenge on Izuku’s behalf, giving both her and Ochaco closure by satisfying their shared motivation to win.
Under such circumstances, Bakugo however would naturally rage and push his quirk to the limit (for all his faults, he is a fierce determinator), injuring himself in the process, which brings us to the final part.
We needed Bakugo’s defeat to be clear cut, no room for debate. We considered having Midnight to call the fight once he blew himself up, but that would give Bakugo an excuse for his defeat - the notion that victory was stolen from him (his own “stab in the back” myth). Mina had to finish the fight on her own terms and knock him out to make the win undeniable.
And as promised way back when I promised rewards to the smart people who could guess two of the final medalists, we have some winners!
The commenter going by the handle of Don't worry about it, you picked Bakugo for Silver and Ochaco for Bronze. Well done, you get a free drabble!
And Rudywings91, you came so close to winning the grand prize of having me write you five drabbles by correctly picking all three of the medalists! But when I asked you to decide to narrow down your picks of Tokoyami and Ochaco for the bronze, you unfortunately called heads and got tails. Seeing that made me feel for you, but you still get a single drabble.
LurkerWithComputer, ofWisdomandWitt and Iron Raven, you guys picked Ochaco for bronze, Good on ya!
This however leaves three slots for the second request week so I’m giving Iron Raven and ofWisdomandWitt a drabble each as lucky losers. Lurker, I love you got picked last time. For the final one I’m giving out to Mosshead_Warbonnet as the lucky person to psit the 100th comment here.
Congrats to you five! Send me your request in the comments (no guro or explicit content plz), and If you don't see this, I’ll notify you through the comment where you submitted your guesses. Don’t be afraid to think PLUS ULTRA!
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