artykoala

[artykoala]

thinking about how neil says jean is a survivor not a fighter and thinking about how jeremy says he is a starving dog and thinking about kevin saying "if you tell him to submit he will" and thinking about jean giving rhemann the racquet and thinking about contrition and thinking about jean asking and expecting to be punished and not fighting back AND ALSO thinking about how nora said jean went to evermore angry and betrayed like if you shoved a cat into a box closed the lid shook it and opened it again and how the cat is jean and thinking about how jean was angry and all claws and teeth when he first showed up at evermore and thinking about jean saying he would tear out kevin's throat with his teeth and thinking about jean wanting to punch jeremy for treating him with too much caution and thinking about jean biting back every time lucas insulted him and thinking about how jean is at once defeated and depressed and unwilling to fight back or fight for himself and also so insanely angry all of the fucking time and how he had (has?) so much passion and emotion and rage that got tortured out of him during his time at evermore but did it really?

[artykoala]

i feel so seen!!

(twitter thread)

[artykoala]

— Greg Santora (via letsbelonelytogetherr)

[artykoala]

Aftg couples doodle yay 🎀

[artykoala]

the face he makes when no one sees

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clean version bc the paper warping in the previous post bothers me

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A softer version of this doodle which I actually prefer

[artykoala]

by thieu_riemen

[artykoala]

His lips were fire against Jean's neck, every point of contact between their bodies blossoming with heat down to where they connected below. Flames licked through Jean's veins; it was all he could do to gasp out a breath.

"You are good," Jeremy whispered into his skin.

[artykoala]

Pretty boys and their pretty eyes 🌼

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morally grey does not mean "is bad but also sad"

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I think I had a visceral reaction to this

just thinking about the emotional response twins have at being separated after birth. growing together in their mothers womb for nine months, close and moving and feeling. brains developing knowing nothing but the darkness and their mothers voice and their twin. always their twin. the separation is felt like a missing limb. do you think Andrew cried and cried and cried for his twin? did Aaron? did Tilda leave him to cry alone in his crib while she got high to quiet the wailing. Andrew bouncing between foster homes because their attempted love could not fill the hole. Aaron constantly missing something but having no clue what it was or how to find it, and discovering that drugs make the missing lessen for a while. both of them eventually believing that there is something inherently wrong with them because why is it never enough. and by the time they finds that missing piece, by some insane miracle, the damage is done. they'd wonder what it had been like if the roles were reversed but its a fleeting thought because in the end they were both doomed from the start to be dissapointed by everyone that was supposed to care for them.

[artykoala]

sobbing over this

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Moody Forests | Peter Polák

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"why does no one ever want to hear about my pussy blood!!!" 💀

the post was about societal stigmatization of a natural part of human existence you feckless cockroach. i’ll stop talking about my periods when i stop getting weird looks for mentioning my cramps in mixed company

[artykoala]

Actually thinking about my time spent in purgatory, aka “the service industry”, I had some wild fucking events over the course of a decade.

There was the time a bride decided she didn’t want to go through with the wedding and tried to make her escape through the back kitchens of the venue and wound up sitting out back in the drizzling rain, bumming cigarettes from the delivery drivers, pristine white dress turning to mulch as she sat on an over turned catering crate. After a good half hour the groom came and found her and asked if she was okay. When she said she wasn’t sure if she wanted to go through with it he just nodded and said she should get out the rain because it was cold. The two of them ended up going back inside together, skipped the wedding part and basically had the most expensive party of their lives with all their friends and family.

There was another bride who could never decide on place settings, so in the end just turned to the coordinator and said “surprise me”. So we mismatched everything and called it “boho chic”. She loved it.

There was the groom who got caught in our supply closet during the late night reception…with the best man. And then there was also the father of the bride who absconded with the mother of the groom and had to be asked nicely to put their clothes back on and get out of the wine cellar.

At the same wedding.

There was the drunk best man who proposed to me using an umbrella cocktail and told me he was heartbroken when I told him I was flattered but married. He wore it behind his ear the rest of the night dancing like a mad man and telling anyone who would listen about “the one that got away”.

There was the Indian wedding with 800 guests. We rotated them in batches of 200 to fit them between spaces. All I can remember is never having enough drinks to hand out.

There was the arch bishop who only liked his coffee ground by hand because the effort of the worker “made it taste better”.

There was the time I took out the crystal drop of a chandelier with a champagne cork because the runners shook up the bottles for a joke.

There was the funeral party where the body couldn’t be delivered to the crematorium because the crematorium caught on fire.

There was the other funeral where a fist fight broke out over something our Jeanie said to our Mary 40 years ago, but then it turned out Mary was the one who said it.

There was the wedding where in a room of 200 people, the bride and groom only had eyes for each other.

There was the christening where the godmother kept crying to me over mocktails because she never thought she could love something as much as she loved “that bald little head”.

There was the old man at the wedding who came alone and smiled very kindly at everyone and always said please and thank you and who told myself and a coworker he’d been married to his wife for over 60 years and how she would have loved to see these two finally tie the not. She’d only passed the week before. He’d brought a picture of her so she could enjoy it in spirit.

There was the really tragic funeral where everyone kept hugging each other and saying “I love you” and us staff had to take frequent breaks to breathe because grief is tangible but so is love.

There were the times when nothing in particular happened at all, but they stand out so much because everyone there was happy.

Of course there was also the times when someone threw up on your shoes, or you got groped while serving the table, or someone was rude or snide because you were “the help”.

People are wild.

[artykoala]

Meal prep

As much as I love drawing doodles and simplified figures, I missed doing full illustrations, feels like it's been a while.

Trojans!! Can't believe I hadn't drawn them fully yet... So, here's my take for the four of them, I guess.

For those who wondered - yes I've read tsc and tgr, obviously (i've been following both of the releases like a famished animal ready to pounce). I love these guys' dynamic and domesticity so much. I wanna be their friend.