ask-the-rox

[ask-the-rox]

(starting off, we are a traumagenic did system. we have did.)

endogenic systems are absolutely punk and they belong in punk spaces (pluralpunk, systempunk, whatever) and here’s why:

- punk is about embracing who you are and living your life authentically and unapologetically

- punk is about not letting other people dictate how you live your life and who you can be

- punk is about radical acceptance, equality, and solidarity

- punk is about rejecting authority and the establishment (and yes, this includes the medical establishment which is often ableist and causes disabled people real, long lasting harm)

there is no room for anti endos in punk. being anti endo literally is being anti punk. learn more about what punk means, and do better.

[ask-the-rox]

i highly encourage plurals to just make up their own words for things. we didnt like how binary(?) the "fully formed alter vs fragment" thing felt, so we just borrowed terms from a game we like to explain 4 levels of alter elaboration. you dont have to use commonly known terms. if you dont like them you can make shit up. its just words your using to describe yourself.

[ask-the-rox]

i love scrolling through the top posts on the pro endo tag and its just filled with people being supportive and loving and downright positive about endogenic and non traumagenic/adaptive systems it makes me so happy i love you pluralpunk, i love you pro endos, i love you those who are freely pro endo, i love those who are lowkey pro endo, i love those who hide their pro endo-ness for whatever reason, i love you those fighting for us and others, i love you those who are comforting, i love you those who are tired, those who are angry, those who are hurting, those in love, those who are happy, all of you and in between i love you pro endos <3

[ask-the-rox]

My imposter syndrome for diagnosed DID went away when my answer for "Oh God what if I'm faking what if I'm just so mentally ill and making it all up?" Became "If I think I'm plural I can just... Be plural. No prerequisites, no trauma needed. I can just be comfortable with what's going on in my head."

Thank you endo systems ❤️

[ask-the-rox]

"This System supports Systems" and variants - 🎴

Flag used is this one : link link link

Requested by anon!

Feel free to use! Credit is not necessary, but always appreciated!

[ask-the-rox]

Reminder that not all plural experiences will be "We're super differenciated and I have all these different people who I can easily communicate with!" or "We have a horrible experience full of three unreal parts who are all basically the same person", or anything, controversial but you don't even have to be plural to be plural lmao. i personally identify with the idea that my brain itself is split into multiple questionable portions that push ideas towards me. This is different from how I see regular plurals. Imagine that a regular plural has a bunch of different blobs bubbling inside their brain, for me it's more like the brain ITSELF is separated into different parts, of which I cannot actually identify properly. Plurality is a fascinating thing, remember that there will always be super different experiences <33

[ask-the-rox]

Here’s some positivity for stargenic and spacegenic systems!

Xeno origins are wonderful labels that can be immensely beneficial and affirming to those who use them. Those whose system origins relate to stars and/or outer space are treasured, valued, and lovely members of the plural community just the way they are! If your system or any of your members are stargenic or spacegenic, this post is for you!

🌌 Shoutout to individual headmates who are spacegenic because they are aliens or otherwise came from outer space!

🪐 Shoutout to stargenic systems who conceptualize their system formation in a similar way to stars forming!

⭐️ Shoutout to systems who have been fakeclaimed or harassed for having stargenic or spacegenic origins!

👽 Shoutout to systems whose plurality is attributed to a special interest, hyperfixation, or intense love of stars and/or outer space!

✨ Shoutout to mixed origins systems for whom stargenic or spacegenic is one of their origins!

🛸 Shoutout to trauma-formed systems who understand, conceptualize, or process their trauma through the lense of stars and/or space!

🌟 Shoutout to systems hand headmates who have their own deeply personal reasons for identifying as spacegenic or stargenic!

🚀 Shoutout to systems who identify deeply with stars or space and use stargenic or spacegenic as a way to reflect that connection!

🌠 Shoutout to systems whose stargenic or spacegenic label has to do with the fact that everything originated at one point in stars, stardust, or outer space!

🔭 Shoutout to systems and headmates who use stargenic or spacegenic labels simply because the want to or like how they sound or what they represent!

💫 Shoutout to those who identify internally with stargenic or spacegenic, but are too nervous to share their origins with others!

Stargenic and spacegenic systems, you are beautiful, lovely, and so very special just the way you are. Your origins are real and the way you identify is valid. You deserve to not only use the labels that feel right for you, but to have your experiences heard, uplifted, and celebrated! Please know that we will never doubt you or make light of your labels here. Regardless of why you identify as spacegenic or stargenic, your origins are genuine and deserve to be taken seriously.

We hope that you can surround yourselves with people who accept you as you are and treat your system with the kindness and respect you so deserve. And we hope that your origin labels bring your whole system a great deal of peace, security, and happiness! We care about you, we care about the labels you use to describe your experiences, and we hope that your lives can be filled with joy and comfort. Thank you so much for reading, and take care!

[ask-the-rox]

idk if this is something you'd have an answer for, but I was wondering if you know of any good bonding activities/games that alters from the same system can do together? we've been working on our communication and acceptance of each other, and want to interact with each other like friends more, but we're not sure what else to do besides talking to each other. hopefully this isn't too vague of a question, and no worries if you don't have any recommendations. I hope you have a good day!

Hey. We do have a post on bonding as a system with some ideas for activities a system can do together

We hope there’s something in this post that could work for y’all. And don’t underestimate the bonding power of talking! Sharing interests, joking around, telling stories, processing big emotions or painful memories, and just goofing off and being silly in general can all be really helpful for a system trying to bond. Communicating is one of the most important things friends can do with each other, and can be very beneficial in strengthening bonds and connections.

Still, that “bonding as a system” post does have some suggestions that don’t have to do with chatting, so we hope it will be helpful for you.

[ask-the-rox]

this self-indulgent joke has been marinating in my head for over a month and i doodled it only now; you're welcome to tell me that im the funniest person ever

[if anyone sees this post at all: for the love of god do not tag this with 'endo's dni/endo's fuck off']

[ask-the-rox]

Here’s some positivity for systems and headmates who used to be anti endo!

Change can be very difficult, and sometimes, it can feel downright impossible. If you are a system or headmate who used to be anti endo, but has since changed your ways, you deserve to be uplifted, embraced, and celebrated in our spaces. You are a part of the plural community, and you belong here just the way you are! Here’s to those who used to be anti endo, but aren’t anymore!

🌺 Shoutout to systems who first learned about plurality through anti endos, and didn’t want to or were scared to question their beliefs!

🌻 Shoutout to individual headmates in pro endo systems who used to be anti endo, but have since come around!

🌷 Shoutout to systems who do not understand endogenic plurality, but who still cherish and believe endogenic systems!

🌼 Shoutout to systems who used to be anti endo, and then later found out they are endogenic or mixed origins themselves!

🌺 Shoutout to systems who were shunned, cut off, or ostracized from their friends or online community after they started questioning their anti endo beliefs!

🌻 Shoutout to those who used to be anti endo, but now advocate for plural solidarity and acceptance!

🌷 Shoutout to systems who are just beginning to question and change their views regarding endogenic plurality!

🌼 Shoutout to past anti endos who now stand up for and defend endogenic systems!

🌺 Shoutout to those who disliked endos as a result of their trauma history, but who changed after they had the chance to heal, learn, and grow!

🌻 Shoutout to systems who used to be anti endo but are now asking questions, being respectful, and having conversations with endogenic systems!

🌷 Shoutout to systems who changed their anti endo beliefs after being treated with kindness, compassion, and patience by endogenic systems and their supporters!

Anti endos are people too, and they are capable of positive growth and change, no matter who they are today and what they believe. If you are a system or headmate who used to be anti endo, but has since changed your ways or beliefs, please know that we are so very proud of you. Changing your beliefs can be extremely difficult! We are sure that there is a lot of pain, fear, and anger that comes along with being anti endo, and we are so very thrilled to see you reach a point where you can let that bitterness go, or at least direct it towards more deserving targets (like the ableist society that we live in or medical institution that discriminated against us all).

Please don’t ever doubt your place in the plural community. Your past does not define you - the actions you take and decisions you make today are so much more important! Our spaces truly would not be the same without you, and we cherish your presence here! You belong in the plural community and your allyship with endogenic systems speaks volumes. Know that we care about you and we believe in you. You inspire and motivate us towards positive change and being the best system we can be. We hope you can take it easy and have a wonderful day today. Know that we’re in your corner, we’re rooting for you, we are ready to fight for you, and we can’t wait to see what your future holds!

[ask-the-rox]

Hi !!! Um okay. So..

I know how this sounds kinda? Idk may just be paranoia. But.

I have some OCtives that are not my OCs and also some are based off of.... adopts....

What should i do when we split ocs based off of adopts? I know obviously i shouldnt use any art because i didnt pay for them, but i am afraid. Like.. what if that headmate doesnt want to change ( and they shouldnt HAVE to but. ) ?

same with OCtives. Most ocs i have let the owners know before leaving, and they understood but idk. I still feel weird.

hey, so headmates often can’t help who they are. and as we wouldn’t expect a factive or a fictive (whose source is often someone else’s original character) to change their appearance for the benefit of others, we feel similarly about this. because introjects can’t help who they are.

now, this isn’t us saying that any system who creates headmates gets a free pass to create headmates based off of any adopts they see that they want to own but don’t want to pay for. in general, we think that would be a selfish and mean thing to do.

this is a tricky situation, and we can’t say for sure that we have the best solution here, but the things that come to mind are…

- you could buy the adopt or pay for the design. then it is yours to use as you wish, and you can make art for your headmate to your hearts’ contents. if you cannot afford it at this time, perhaps you could speak to the artist and see if they would be willing to place the design on hold.

- you could explain the situation to this octive, and see if the two of you could collaborate to create a new appearance for them. you can unleash your creativity by drawing, writing out descriptions, or making picrews and see if anything sticks.

- you could let this headmate live their life without forcing them to change… without drawing them, getting commissions of them, or trying to depict them physically like the adopt or oc they are based off of. let them live their life and discover more about who they are as an individual. and if they ever reach a point where they notice some differences, in name, appearance, identity, what have you, then y’all may feel more comfortable with depicting them in art.

we are wary of saying “just go about your business with this headmate anyway and hope that the original artist doesn’t see that their design was taken without their consent,” because, while it’s true this headmate deserves to live as themselves as they see fit… this could definitely end up badly, for both the headmate and the artist who created their original design.

we know that none of these solutions are ideal, but we feel like it’s important to consider the original creators in these situations. ocs and adopts are inherently different from characters found in published works. the designs of the former may have strong personal connections and connotations with their creators, and the designs of the latter are meant to be purchased and used by others. while it’s true, the characters within published works may be personally very significant to their creators, by allowing others to interact and engage with their works, they are subjecting their characters to the interpretations of others. we feel like personal ocs are different in this regard.

so sorry if this response got rambly and doesn’t make much sense. if anyone else has any advice to share, it would be most welcome.

[ask-the-rox]

You know, an interesting tumblr transformation that's happened gradually, and which I've seen no one talk about: ask-culture has essentially dropped off to nothing.

By which I mean, asks used to be WAY more of the tumblr economy. They used to be more common to send, and receive, and see. They were integral to the collaborative, forum-like behavior of old tumblr communities, not even to speak on the HUGE number of ask-blogs that used to exist to only be interacted with in ask-form.

I'm not saying this in a vying-for-attention way but instead in an observational way: I used to get way way more asks in like 2015, even with a fraction of my follower count. I wonder if it's due to the homogenization of social media sites? There's a lot more of this divide between "content creator" and "consumer" instead of just a bunch of peer blogs who would talk to each other. "Asks" aren't really a thing on twitter, are they? And as I understand it, the closest thing to an "ask" on instagram or tiktok would be a creator screenshotting some comment and responding to it in a new reel or video or whatever those content mediums are. Are asks just too tumblr-specific? Is that aspect of the site culture dying out as more and more people converge to using all their social media sites in the same way?

[ask-the-rox]

Here’s some positivity for systems whose headmates have vastly differing opinions!

It is a common occurrence for many systems for members to sometimes fight, clash, or disagree. Thought it may make system life challenging sometimes, there is nothing wrong with having views and ideas that vary across your collective. If your system has members with vastly differing opinions, this post is for you!

💫 Shoutout to systems who have always struggled with chronic indecision!

🫂 Shoutout to systems who struggle to accomplish or try new things due to headmates having difficulties coming to a consensus!

💕 Shoutout to headmates who have become passive or aren’t able to voice their own opinions due to fear of being overruled by the rest of their system!

💫 Shoutout to systems who want to develop a collective identity, but can’t due to strong individual differences between headmates!

🫂 Shoutout to systems whose differing opinions make it difficult for them to practice new skills or hobbies!

💕 Shoutout to systems who have a sense of dread about their future due to the stark differences between headmates!

💫 Shoutout to systems whose headmates have differing political views or moral values which make their lives complicated!

🫂 Shoutout to systems who are learning to facilitate in-system discussions to better work through their differences!

💕 Shoutout to systems who try to respect and embrace each other’s differing views, opinions, and ideas!

💫 Shoutout to systems whose differing opinions among headmates causes their whole collective a great deal of confusion, distress, or impairment!

🫂 Shoutout to systems whose chronic indecision causes them to need accommodations like more time to deliberate, extra or combined options, or a caregiver who can help them make choices!

💕 Shoutout to headmates who are learning how to compromise when different system members want different things!

Folks, please know that indecision and vastly differing views, ideas, and opinions often comes with the territory of plurality. You’re not wrong or bad for having opinions that differ from the majority of your system. You’re not rude, broken, or inconsiderate if arguments and difficulties deciding often cause dysfunction in your collective. You matter, your system matters, and your voices and opinions deserve to be heard and expressed just the way they are!

Our hearts go out to you as a fellow system whose indecision and differing opinions can be overwhelming and debilitating. We hope that learning to work together and take each others’ ideas into account will become easier for your system with time and practice. Please do your best to treat yourself and your system with compassion, and don’t be too hard on yourselves if your differing views causes complications to arise in your lives. We hope you all will be able to breathe, take your time, and ultimately reach conclusions that work well for everyone. Know that we care about y’all and we’re wishing y’all the very best in all that you do!

[ask-the-rox]

When you are trying to figure out our system headcount and enlist the help of another alter:

Conclusion: Neither of us can count

[ask-the-rox]

I don't exactly know how to word this but

I think that if you feel like different people at different times you should be able to use pluralkit or things similar. If it makes you more comfortable to be recognized as a different person than the body at different times you should be able to use things to show that. I dont care if you're not a DID/OSDD system. If it makes you more comfortable and makes you able to express yourself in a way that makes you happy than you should be able to do it. At the end of the day you aren't hurting anyone and it isn't that big of a deal. If it makes you feel more comfortable in your own skin, do it.

[ask-the-rox]

and a special shout-out to introjects who don’t know much about their own source. It can be confusing & invalidating, but I want to say you’re not alone.

[ask-the-rox]

bring back tumblr ask culture let me. bother you with questions and statements