ask-the-sign-keeper

[ask-the-sign-keeper]

creating a new OC. He's a doctor who treats weird kink furries. his bit is that every patient who comes into his office he has to figure out how to complete the checkup while working around some weird toon-logic contrivance. He's like the doctor house of kink because he's the only one in his field capable of getting results. He's massively overworked and he's been IP banned from the e621 forums.

[ask-the-sign-keeper]

thank you to every single fucking person on this god forsaken site that has ever posted your own art or writing. You really put a vulnerable, important part of yourself out in the open on the hellscape that is the internet and if that isnt an act of bravery and a labor of love I dont know what one is

[ask-the-sign-keeper]

“Why greetings my lord, thank you for sending a glorg to help me out and it’s good to see you as well” *the sign ‘smiles his eyes lighting up with happiness so to speak.*

(Funnyphone comes out of the ground next to Pikit.) FUNNYPHONE: ATTENTION EVERYONE. THE MEATBALL MAN HAS ESCAPED CAPTIVITY AND IS DESTROYING EVERYTHING IN ITS PATH. PLEASE GO TO THE BUNKER LOCATED IN THE GLORG KINGDOM. THANK YOU FOR YOUR TIME. (Funnyphone goes back in the ground.)

“Oh me oh my that scared the living daylights out of me! However I don’t have legs so I guess I am done for so to speak?”

[ask-the-sign-keeper]

“Oh this place is amazing how long till we reach the throne room I wish to thank the king for his kindness” the sign looked around ‘smiling’ judging by the look of happiness in his eye.

(Funnyphone comes out of the ground next to Pikit.) FUNNYPHONE: ATTENTION EVERYONE. THE MEATBALL MAN HAS ESCAPED CAPTIVITY AND IS DESTROYING EVERYTHING IN ITS PATH. PLEASE GO TO THE BUNKER LOCATED IN THE GLORG KINGDOM. THANK YOU FOR YOUR TIME. (Funnyphone goes back in the ground.)

“Oh me oh my that scared the living daylights out of me! However I don’t have legs so I guess I am done for so to speak?”

[ask-the-sign-keeper]

HE LOOKS AMAZING I love the way you did his teeth and eyes

Drew a very badly humanized Grobletombus because why not i love him

[ask-the-sign-keeper]

(Funnyphone comes out of the ground next to Pikit.) FUNNYPHONE: ATTENTION EVERYONE. THE MEATBALL MAN HAS ESCAPED CAPTIVITY AND IS DESTROYING EVERYTHING IN ITS PATH. PLEASE GO TO THE BUNKER LOCATED IN THE GLORG KINGDOM. THANK YOU FOR YOUR TIME. (Funnyphone goes back in the ground.)

“Oh me oh my that scared the living daylights out of me! However I don’t have legs so I guess I am done for so to speak?”

[ask-the-sign-keeper]

“Hm that dose sound like quite the catastrophe, however maybe it might have been one of the players.?”

DRING KING: Hello again, Pikit. It's been a while.

The sign stops and turns to face the king, his eye closes temporarily as he greets the king once more. “Why hello there my lord how are you doing today and may I ask what brings you to the upper lands today?”

[ask-the-sign-keeper]

DRING KING: Hello again, Pikit. It's been a while.

The sign stops and turns to face the king, his eye closes temporarily as he greets the king once more. “Why hello there my lord how are you doing today and may I ask what brings you to the upper lands today?”

[ask-the-sign-keeper]

Oh hello there!

Have a question or two?

[ask-the-sign-keeper]

Sentence Starters

“I’ve never seen one of these completely to my taste so i decided to make my own!

ANGST

“I can’t do anything right.”

“Please don’t cry.”

“Why are you awake right now?”

“Why are you lying to me?”

“Wake up! Please wake up.”

“Forget it, you’re a fucking asshole.”

“Don’t you ever do that again!”

“Is that blood?” “…..No?”

“Please don’t lie to me again, I can’t take it.”

“Do you even still love me?”

“Nobody’s seen you in days.”

“Why are you awake?”

“I’m worried about you.”

“Can you shut up for once in your life?”

“Holding everything in doesn’t help, you know.”

“Are you hurt?” “No.” “Then why are there bruises all over your face?”

“If you don’t hug me right now I think I might fall apart.”

“Leave! Me! Alone!”

FLUFF

“Go with me?” “As long as you hold my hand.”

“Is there a reason you’re blushing like that?” 

“Have you seen my hoodie?” “Nooo.” “You’re wearing it, aren’t you?”

“Have you always been this beautiful?”

“OH you’re jealous!”

“Can we stay like this forever?”

“Please just kiss me already.”

“I think you might be my soulmate.”

“Sleep over? Please?”

“Are we on a date right now?”

“I think I’m in love with you.”

“He’s so pretty I think I’m gonna faint.”

“Are you flirting with me?” “You finally noticed?”

“Am I your lockscreen?” “You weren’t supposed to see that.”

“I missed you so much.”

“Do you think the moon is jealous of how pretty you are?”

“I’m here for you.”

“I wish we could live together already.”

MISC

“All I do is drink coffee and say bad words.”

“Quit touching me, your feet are cold!”

“I think I just ripped my pants.”

“Sharing is caring, now give me the hoodie!”

“Can I pet your dog?” “Do I know you?”

“Did you seriously just get your foot stuck in a toilet?” “Maybe.”

“If I die, I’m haunting you first.”

“But I’ve never told you that before.” 

“Stop being grumpy, it’s lame.”

“So, uh, I locked the keys in the car.”

“Is the cat in a onesie?” “Uh, no?

“Can we please stop running? I think I’m dying.”

“You come here often?” “Well, I work here. So I think I’d have to say ‘yes’.”

“Aren’t we supposed to be working?”

“Give me attention.”

“YOU SAID TO BE HONEST STOP HITTING ME!”

“Okay, so maybe I didn’t see that coming.”

“I’m too sober for this.” “You don’t even drink.” “Maybe I should start.”

[ask-the-sign-keeper]

Greetings there travelers I have a very important message for you all

Please take care of yourself, self care is very hard for some but I hope that your days will be better as your night call. But I am simply a sign but may groble be with you all

[ask-the-sign-keeper]

Well I’m here if you need a hug as well I may not have arms but I can still provide comfort as well

What did you so to get the “demise”? Did you anger groble or something?

It's a long story. I should start before it happened so it makes more sense.

You all know about the Bonekeeper, right. Well, he was still alive when he started working for the royal family. He had spent years searching for the secret of immortality, as he claims that what comes after death is worse than anything you can imagine. Grombletombus didn't like that one bit and sent one of his followers to hunt him down and kill him. He had already become immortal, yet the follower didn't know that yet. I saw him being attacked and I knew something had to be done. I killed grombletombus' follower, and for interfering, Grombletombus... cursed me. The 1-up juice is the only thing preventing me from... from turning to dust.

...that...that's all I'm gonna say for now...

[ask-the-sign-keeper]

What did you so to get the “demise”? Did you anger groble or something?

It's a long story. I should start before it happened so it makes more sense.

You all know about the Bonekeeper, right. Well, he was still alive when he started working for the royal family. He had spent years searching for the secret of immortality, as he claims that what comes after death is worse than anything you can imagine. Grombletombus didn't like that one bit and sent one of his followers to hunt him down and kill him. He had already become immortal, yet the follower didn't know that yet. I saw him being attacked and I knew something had to be done. I killed grombletombus' follower, and for interfering, Grombletombus... cursed me. The 1-up juice is the only thing preventing me from... from turning to dust.

...that...that's all I'm gonna say for now...

[ask-the-sign-keeper]

A traumatized friend shaped baby wants his hugs

[ask-the-sign-keeper]

Ah it’s the king himself to thank you for correcting me. However what bring your royal self to the upper area?

Hello again, Pikit. I was wondering... what made you start giving out level advice in the first place?

We’ll I guess it was impulsiveness at best however I felt a strange urge to as if I was acting out a part in a game you know? But sounds really silly now but that I say it out loud. I mean it’s not like we are in a game or anything....right?

[ask-the-sign-keeper]

me: wants to write crossovers with friends ocs because i love them so much

also me: too scared i'll make them ooc and be way off the mark

[ask-the-sign-keeper]

T h I s

(Besides asks, you can also send me headcanon promps)