askbigdaddysatan

[askbigdaddysatan]

Imps invoking my name is expected but this is... hmmmpf... I'll have to try the offering to determine if I should find this insulting or not.

Tea of the Week: Satan's Flames

one part green tea with ginger

one part orange juice

one part amaretto

layered over ice

lemon zest, garnished with dragon fruit.

((This recipe is courtesy of @able-juice ))

[askbigdaddysatan]

You wrathfulness . I must humbly ask of you what your workout routine is . I don’t care if the attempt at it would kill me . Give me STRENGTH or give me DEATH 😎😈

Do ya really think a physique as powerful as mine is attainable by a mere mortal?

I'll entertain the question, though. Personally, 1000 Pull-ups, 1000 push-ups, max reps with 1000 lbs bench press, and the same for an overhead press- I try to keep things simple and break up my workout days with an hour of bag work- half split on a speed bag and a weighted one- and round things off with yoga to keep balanced and work out any stiffness in my back or shoulders. If you truly wish to perish in your attempt to attain such heights, I have gone through the tremendous trouble of finding a suitable guide for a mere mortal to, possibly, gain a similar physique if lacking the immense power I possess.

Enjoy the journey of building your power, mortal. Take Pride in it. But do not forget your place.

[askbigdaddysatan]

It takes entirely too much concentration to fill out the forms with the little pen- same questions as always, and it requires some conscious exercising of decorum on his part to keep from snapping the clipboard. Or the pen. Preferably both.

Once it's finished, he sets it aside and goes to the coffee machine, deciding a bit of coffee isn't a terrible idea.

He takes one of the impossibly small pods and holds it with one hand while carefully tapping on the little screen with a claw. Between waiting for the screen to update and the impossibly small text, it becomes a matter of his desire for a drink warring against his patience. It isn't even going to be worth it- the amount of liquid dispensed will hardly count as a mouthful for him- but this is part of the process. He's a Deadly Sin, waiting rooms are beneath him, but confronting the tedium of day-to-day living is part of his treatment plan.

Once he makes his selection, the machine opens and he- very, very carefully- seats the pod into the receptacle and stands up, crossing his arms over his chest.

The machine whirs and churns, and about forty seconds later, he cup is produced. It's not even as big as his pinky claw and he tosses back the contents in one gulp. It's perfect, just the way he likes it, but there's so little- and he crushes the paper cup at the thought of doing the whole process again for a little more...

... but it does taste really good...

He snags another pod and begins the process anew, fighting not to curse at the machine as the program flashes a waiting signal between selections.

Satan receives a text message. It reads:

‘Hello Satan! This is a friendly reminder about your upcoming therapy session. Please, remember to arrive 15 minutes before the beginning of your session and to bring a list of current medications. We look forward to seeing you soon!’

(( @yuimayogurt ))

Satan growls at the sound of his hellphone going off before reading the text and pushing out a breath through his nose. Right, right, just another appointment he's meant to keep in between all his other duties. Ruling Hell keeps him busy but 'mindfulness' and 'self care' are supposed to be high on his priority list, so he confirms the appointment and checks the clock, backwards planning from there.

However, there aren't enough hours in the day, and he has to leave before he's halfway through a stack of tedious proposals that are, honestly, a waste of his time, and he hates the idea of leaving unfinished work behind. It'll just set the rest of his schedule behind. Leafing through the remaining papers, he recognizes none of the names attached, which means they're probably not important enough to warrant his attention anyway. He sets the stack of paper on fire and tosses them into the fireplace as he heads out the door, long strides taking him from his office to the adjoining hallway and then into another room he likes to use for teleporting to and from anywhere in the seven rings.

Mainly because it was fireproof and blast resistant.

In the blink of an eye and a flash of Hellfire, Satan appears in the waiting room of his therapist's office, remembering to duck his head at the last minute to keep his horns from catching on the ceiling. As he steps up to the front counter, he catches the clock on the wall. He's arrived fourteen minutes before his appointment.

A growl rumbles out; he detests being late.

He takes the offered clipboard and takes a seat in the largest chair available- though it still doesn't quite accommodate his broad frame- and begins filling out his paperwork.

[askbigdaddysatan]

How are you today Satan?

Busy running Hell.

[askbigdaddysatan]

Satan receives a text message. It reads:

‘Hello Satan! This is a friendly reminder about your upcoming therapy session. Please, remember to arrive 15 minutes before the beginning of your session and to bring a list of current medications. We look forward to seeing you soon!’

(( @yuimayogurt ))

Satan growls at the sound of his hellphone going off before reading the text and pushing out a breath through his nose. Right, right, just another appointment he's meant to keep in between all his other duties. Ruling Hell keeps him busy but 'mindfulness' and 'self care' are supposed to be high on his priority list, so he confirms the appointment and checks the clock, backwards planning from there.

However, there aren't enough hours in the day, and he has to leave before he's halfway through a stack of tedious proposals that are, honestly, a waste of his time, and he hates the idea of leaving unfinished work behind. It'll just set the rest of his schedule behind. Leafing through the remaining papers, he recognizes none of the names attached, which means they're probably not important enough to warrant his attention anyway. He sets the stack of paper on fire and tosses them into the fireplace as he heads out the door, long strides taking him from his office to the adjoining hallway and then into another room he likes to use for teleporting to and from anywhere in the seven rings.

Mainly because it was fireproof and blast resistant.

In the blink of an eye and a flash of Hellfire, Satan appears in the waiting room of his therapist's office, remembering to duck his head at the last minute to keep his horns from catching on the ceiling. As he steps up to the front counter, he catches the clock on the wall. He's arrived fourteen minutes before his appointment.

A growl rumbles out; he detests being late.

He takes the offered clipboard and takes a seat in the largest chair available- though it still doesn't quite accommodate his broad frame- and begins filling out his paperwork.

[askbigdaddysatan]

Are you mocking me mortal?

Heheheheheh -🏡

@ask-peter

And what are you laughing at, mortal?

[askbigdaddysatan]

Heheheheheh -🏡

@ask-peter

And what are you laughing at, mortal?

[askbigdaddysatan]

I suppose it's time to make one o' them introduction posts.

I am Satan, ruler of the Seven Rings of Hell since the pretty boy can't be bothered anymore, and ultimate infernal authority. Welcome to my court, where I pass judgment on every wretched soul who comes before me. Now, I'm a busy man, so I suggest you keep it brief and move right along.

What, were you expecting more? Go find a Goetia if you want theatrics; I've got my next meeting to get to.

[askbigdaddysatan]

It's not that I haven't been here; it's the holidays and I've been spending the time preparing for Sinsmas and gettin' done all my other duties. Even the ruler of Hell and master of the infernal powers needs to focus on effective time management. I was certain the opportune time to really get this social media thing started would present itself eventually.

I suppose this is it.

mod, have you seen any Satan ask blogs for helluva boss? like genuinely I have been SCOURING tumblr for some but the best I can find is Satan from obey me and I’m not in that fandom and it’s completely different from HB/HH

Honestly i haven't found any either, for such a huge character and an instant fan favourite I've yet to see an Rp blog for him yet

I can't even see the excuse of there not being enough content to work with its odd🤔

Anyone who wants to take up the torch and try there hand at being big bad satan feel free!