astralcat

[astralcat]

SO TRUE BUT HEY

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more one piece (mostly zolu) + text posts [2/?]

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Gundam character of the day: this space rat from 0079

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I’m going to say it, if Sabo was real Katy Perry wouldn’t have gone to space—at the very least she wouldn’t have made it back—

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you're going about your normal day when, suddenly, surprise! you've been pokémon mystery dungeon'd!

unfortunately, due to budget cuts, the pokémon assigning quiz has been canceled. instead, you must spin THE WHEEL, assigning you a random, unevolved, non-legendary and non-mythical pokémon. you must now go on some sort of world-saving adventure as this pokémon. good luck!

tell me in the tags what you rolled, and how you feel about it - for bonus points, you can spin the wheel again for (or just take your pick of) a pokémon to be your partner.

bonus rules:

you're not shiny unless the wheel tells you you're shiny

take your pick of regional forms and evolutions (for example, if you roll vulpix, it's up to you whether that means normal or alolan vulpix)

apply whatever logic you like with regards to gender

have fun and be yourself!

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will is pokémon's char

I am here for feminist sex

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combine your first real fandom with your current one to create a terrible, terrible au

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episode 13 of patalliro is weirdly topical today huh

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Here is a chapter from Volume 48, Mystery 1: Mystery of the Greek Icon! (the mystery chapters are numbered separately from other chapters for some reason)

In which Maraich has a fine and good time and is a very clever boy.

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posted a thread on twt of my avery x will au fic idea featuring mpreg so i guess ill crawl out of my underground hole dump it here too. it may be a rarepair but it's MY rarepair

avery and will are a stage magician double act, performing shows where they use their psychic powers in their magic tricks. they've been performing for about 5 years now, and are also in a relationship with each other, but keep it a secret from everyone else due to privacy concerns. basically the main conflict occurs when their agency schedules them to go on a big anniversary world tour— the thing is, will is in his first trimester of pregnancy (the two of them had been trying for a baby for a while + will just found out a few days ago). they have to kick off the tour in castelia city in two weeks, and the tour is scheduled to go for a whole year— the baby would have to be born while the tour would be happening. will & avery are both extremely opposed to touring during this time as:

1) there isn't really an efficient way to hide a pregnancy when you're performing on a stage as opposed to on a tv show. no matter how many props you shove in front of a baby bump, someone's gonna be able to see it. which leads into the next problem:

2) paparazzi + rumors. will & avery are decently famous, and as mentioned before, they've managed to keep their relationship secret from the press for a while now— they even got married without them knowing. the moment the press finds out about will's pregnancy, the meowth's out of the bag as avery would be number one on the list of possible fathers. they wouldn't get any privacy if the paparazzi finds out... also, paparazzi or not, someone could easily catch a picture of will and post it to chatotter with the caption "is he pregnant 🤔" and everyone in the world would know in the span of under a day.

3) as mentioned before, the baby would have to be born on the tour. extremely inconvenient, and having to take care of a living human being would only add to the stress of touring + if will went into labor during a show it would be a huge disaster.

4) what to do when will gets to the point where it can't perform comfortably anymore (late third trimester + postpartum). will's kind of the fan favorite of the duo, and they're a double act. the audience wants will & avery, not just avery, or avery and some random roadie pretending to be will.

avery & especially will are extremely opposed to their agency's proposition, before the agency reveals they've already distributed promo material for the tour, and have even started selling tickets at some locations. avery loses it, asking who the hell put this tour together without even consulting the main act beforehand. the agency then says that when avery & will signed with them, the contract included a clause saying that they'd do anniversary world tours every 5 years, and it's been 5 years since their debut. at this point they give up on fighting the agency any longer. they're contractually obligated to do the tour, and the agency just assumed they wouldn't have forgotten about that, even though it had been 5 years since they signed. they'd just have to make things work for now.

at one show in hearthome city, an audience member in the front row manages to catch a glimpse of will's slightly rounded belly (he's around 18 weeks along at this time). said audience member proceeds to ask about it to avery & will. "are you... you know?"

the words fall out of will's mouth.

"i feel like i have to address something first. me and avery have been in a relationship for four years, and got married in private last year. but that doesn't mean i'm confirming or denying anything. you'll just have to wait and see."

their fanbase goes wild with speculation, especially on that last sentence. after a few days, will finally posts its ultrasound pics on social media with the caption "guess the fan from hearthome city's finally getting an answer. i'm about 19 weeks along rn"

their tour continues much more smoothly (but not without a few shenanigans caused by will's behaviors while pregnant, such as his cravings & mood swings, and also the baby showing signs of inheriting their parents' psychic abilities despite not being very good at controlling them, leading to one incident where an audience member got hypnotized in a different way than what was intended) than the two initially thought it was going to go. they even get an opportunity to pause the tour so will can have his kid (a boy btw) and rest up for a few months after.

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Bro

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why the hell does patalliro seem oddly fixated on maraich having periods

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maraich's two moods

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i feel like i have a civic duty to share canon maraich goon sesh with the world

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you punch nazis!

(requested by anonymous)

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while you might've sold an employee's soul for 62 cents, i took advantage of a man who wanted to go to the moon and exploited his ability to cure people of illness by charging 100k a treatment and forcing him to work without any concern for his health, and only when i learned that this ability literally drained his life force did i call the whole thing off, only to be too late as he had to cure an important figure who was the only key to ending a war who was in critical condition, giving his life in the process. and then i had the audacity to be sad at his death, but before you say anything i'm literally neurodivergent and a minor