astraphone

[astraphone]

Holy crap guys I think we broke Emmrich

[astraphone]

laptop is broken and i can’t get it (hopefully? please god i cannot afford a new laptop rn?) fixed/looked at until thursday…. all i want to do is play deadfire

[astraphone]

A series of posts that’ll have you googling “the pope”

[astraphone]

more thoughts on this. adéla was stoic and diplomatic all the way through poe1, i don’t remember ever hitting a passionate or aggressive option for her. because any of those emotions were trained out of her by her family from a young age—in like a ‘don’t let anybody see how you react to things, don’t let anybody know what you’re thinking’ kinda way. i think she’s especially stoic the worse she’s feeling, in a retreating into herself kind of way.

and then she wakes up on the ship after caed nua is destroyed and she’s furious, she wants revenge and she’ll follow eothas to the end of the world for it, and then she’s horrified when she realizes that she’s feeling things she’s kept herself from feeling pretty much her entire life. in her mind it’s an ‘i came back wrong’ thing and in other people’s minds it’s maybe more of a ‘oh, thank god, she’s finally feeling an emotional response appropriate to the situation’ thing

i’ve been playing my watcher as generally extremely stoic but unfortunately it all fell apart the second there was a dialogue option to tell eothas to go fuck himself.

[astraphone]

i’ve been playing my watcher as generally extremely stoic but unfortunately it all fell apart the second there was a dialogue option to tell eothas to go fuck himself.

[astraphone]

love is love or whatever

based on this

[astraphone]

some watcher romance thoughts: i just triggered the aloth romance WAY earlier than i intended to (i haven’t left neketaka yet) but i think it kinda works.

in poe1, adéla and aloth were definitely dancing around each other for most of the game. in my mind they were THIS close to getting together until the very end when adéla, who already had her fair share of emotional vulnerability issues, remembered iovara & realized she’d doomed her past lover to an unimaginably horrible fate. she is NOT in a place for a relationship at that point, aloth isn’t really either, and they go their separate ways for five years without ever having fully acknowledged it.

and then they meet back up in the deadfire and it’s like “oh, right, we were absolutely falling for each other before, weren’t we?” they’ve both processed a lot over the past five years and i think it makes sense for both of them to be like ‘you know what, let’s give it a fucking shot’ from the get-go.

[astraphone]

did you hear they're gonna start publicly executing anyone with a glimmer of hope and a light in their eyes

[astraphone]

Aufra sits by the fire, the full curve of her belly shadowed in the light. Her shadow flickers against the wall while Allerleirauh is curled up on a temporary cot, beneath a borrowed blanket.

Allerleirauh watches the shadows. She thinks of eclipses, of wheels turning, and of the roundness of a cat’s eye. Her head aches. She’s worn out from crying. But Aufra has not cried today.

Calisca is three days dead, and four hours buried. But Aufra has not cried today.

Calisca is dead, and what survived of Allerleirauh is hollowed out, scraped thin. If only that meant she was empty! She’s not sure what dreadful thing has rushed in to fill the vacant space left after the bîaŵac, only that it whispers at her day and night. She has not made mention of this to her host—she has just enough sense to know it would complicate things, and this is delicate as it is.

A man, insubstantial as air, drifts through the room. He glowers at Allerleirauh before dissipating into the ether.

It undoes her. She is weeping again. Aufra slowly rises.

“I’ll brew us some tea,” she whispers, and Aller thinks, with a stab of guilt, that she is not the one who has lost a sister.

~

Around midday the miller stops by. Aller stares at him, worrying at a ragged fingernail as he chats with Aufra. He brings grain, and his condolences. He’s heard about her sister. He’s also heard and about her peculiar guest, the woman who dragged Calisca miles through the wilderness to deliver her home.

He tips his hat in greeting, and Allerleirauh frowns. He must be real. Trumbel is too ridiculous a name to have come from her delusions.

“I’m sure sorry to hear about Cal,” he says. “You did good making it so her kin could pay proper respects.”

Aller nods. The rest of the conversation between Aufra and the miller slides right past her. Something about trouble in the town. Unhappiness. Food scarcity. Were she still trading with her caravan, Gilded Vale would present an enticing prospect. Hungry people were desperate people, and she could always flip between generosity and opportunism on a whim.

“Your neighbors are kind,” she tells Aufra after he’s left.

She gives her a thin smile. “He’s sticking his neck out, setting food aside for me,” she murmurs. “People are… so angry lately. But Trumbel’s a good sort. Troubled times, but Gilded Vale is like that, full of good people. You have to believe that, regardless of…” Aufra hesitates, before finishing her words in a soft exhale, “anything else you might see.”

“I believe it,” Aller says. “You’re helping me, after all. A stranger.”

“A friend of Calisca’s is a friend of mine.”

“Mm,” Aller says, the sentiment drawing a wounded sound from her. Aufra looks up at her as she hurriedly turns away. She’s wept enough in front of this woman, intruded upon her space, delivered horrible news… how can she ever repay her?

“I appreciate that, truly, I…”

She is desperate to avoid the topic of Calisca, but her words fail her. One would never believe that she was a Chanter.

“I’m sorry. I’m… not quite myself of late,” she finishes lamely.

“I understand.”

Aller nods. Probably she does.

“What did Trumbel bring, anyway?”

Aufra holds up the bag of grain. “Seminola.”

“Seminola?” Aller puts her hands together, in an unconvincing attempt at cheer. “Well… let’s make something.”

“I was going to have it in a porridge,” Aufra says. “I don’t really have a lot…”

“I will bring ingredients. It is the least I can do after all you’ve done for me.” Allerleirauh is already pulling on her ragged boots, and her travel coat. She has not washed in days, she looks like she hasn’t slept for longer. “We can add eggs, cheese… or do you prefer a sweet pudding? I can find raisins.”

Aufra lets out an incredulous laugh, struck by the suggestion. “I haven’t seen a raisin in months,” she replies.

It is a bad idea, to be sure, but there is no stopping her now that she’s fixed on this idea. Aller is already at the door. Her sanity and her grief are vast and overwhelming matters. A grocery list is a small one.

“I’ll be back,” she calls out.

She’s gone then, and Aufra stands in place, thinks about what she just said.

“Months,” she repeats, hands smoothing over her belly, her eyes welling with tears in the silence. Her voice catches as she continues. “Maybe even a year. How… silly. I never liked them much to begin with, but I hadn’t realized, until just now…”

~

She feels better when she’s moving.

Allerleirauh hurries down the lane, making little note of the muddy puddles and debris. She scans her surroundings. She finds herself under a flat, grey sky. She nearly collides with a woman—but in the blink of an eye the woman isn’t there, and Aller lets out a startled yelp when she vanishes.

“Stop, stop,” she whispers. “Stop it, all of you. Gods—”

This isn’t good. She looks every bit like the mad old man who roamed her home town in Ixamitl, depending on the generosity of others to survive. Aller is not insane, she’s ill; she was ill when the ambush happened and the fright of it all has resulted in some fevered notion persevering in her head. The woman she loves is dead and she is forced to conclude that Calisca never, not once, mentioned her to her family. She won’t weep in Aufra’s home any further, that much she’s stubbornly decided.

Eggs and cheese. Raisins, or jam if the store doesn’t have any. Allerleirauh rounds a corner, her path curving near a low stone wall. She slows to a stop and stares.

Gilded Vale is rural. Agricultural. She knows its like well. A small temple for the townspeople to pray at. A single, storied inn. It’s a quiet place where people lead simple lives.

A sizable tree grows at the center of town, its canopy visible over the low buildings.

The tree’s branches creak in the wind, burdened by countless dead bodies. They hang by the neck, hanging from rope, from leather cord, from burlap twine, ripped sheets. Dwarves, elves, humans, a few orlans. Some look freshly dead, others are badly decayed, around the neck especially.

A vision. Surely a vision of her distressed mind.

Aller approaches one of the men in the square. He kindly directs her to the nearby inn, while puffing away at his pipe.

This reasonably assures her that she is hallucinating. And yet, she finds that quite preferable to the alternative. She puts the tree out of her thoughts as she heads right for the Black Hound Inn.

[astraphone]

oh my god nobody told me deadfire had a turn based combat option. we are SO BACK

[astraphone]

you can live anywhere within your chosen city, as long as it’s within the city limits.

[astraphone]

Selene Companion AU

had it for a while. putting it on main because I need a point of reference when talking about it to people and also like. It's Fun. with the power of imagination you too can have Selene Moonborn in YOUR Watcher's party

background: this AU gives Selene her original background of being raised in an Ondrite temple in The White That Wends, escaping and eventually making her way to the Dyrwood, with the difference that she happened to arrive several weeks sooner and not on Odema's caravan. alone, she wandered until eventually deciding to head to Defiance Bay, where the Watcher eventually encounters her.

Recruitment

Once allied with Dunryd Row, you receive a sidequest from Kurren to investigate a chain of serial murders (separate from the disappearances connected to Lumdala; these are proven murders, with bodies found). He'll direct you to a few crime scenes, where you will read the remnants of the victims' souls to learn how exactly each of them died, and where the killer went after that. You will learn that the killer was a woman, who was cloaked but emitted some kind of light, and that all of the victims were suffering prior to their deaths: a victim of robbery stabbed and left to die, a sick man with nothing to relieve his pain, a heartbroken widow who has tired of life.

You will eventually follow the killer's tracks to Ondra's Gift, where you'll find her in an abandoned building where a gang of criminals was torturing a traitor. The torturers are already dead, and she's getting ready to finish off the victim; with a high enough skill check you can stop her, but otherwise she'll put an end to the woman's suffering.

The killer turns out to be a moon godlike woman. Either through dialogue or through Watcher powers, you learn that she has some kind of condition that makes her feel the pain of others, and being in a crowded city overflowing with refugees is driving her insane. She has been killing suffering people in a futile attempt to make the noise stop.

At this point, you can either fight and kill her, putting her out of her misery, or turn her in to Dunryd Row (mentioning them will make her perk up, barely recalling that she wanted to find Dunryd Row before the noise became too much, hoping that they could help her).

In your next conversation with Lady Webb, she'll mention the woman you brought in: her name is Selene, and the ciphers of Hadret House have been able to bring her back to her senses. Webb explains that Selene is a powerful cipher whose mental defenses were worn down, and that though an insanity plea might spare her from being executed, she'll probably be locked away in the sanitarium for life. A Watcher with a high enough Intellect or Perception can pick up on the fact that she wants them to ask whether there's a better solution to Selene's problem; otherwise, Webb will bring it up herself. Either way, she will offer that the Watcher take Selene with them. If you agree, she will become available as a companion.

(If the Watcher refuses to take Selene with them, the first time you camp outdoors after the Defiance Bay riots you'll get a cutscene where she approaches the camp and asks to join you, explaining that she saw what happened in Hadret House and wants to avenge the deaths of those who helped her, giving you a second - and last - chance to recruit her)

Dialogue

Selene gets more dialogue options as her companion quest advances, but by default you can question her about her abilities, her condition and her homeland, all of which she will be perfectly willing to explain — though she skirts around discussing her community and its religious practices, saying that it's personal. She has a bitter attitude towards everything Ondrite, and it's clear that she was once fond of the religion, but for whatever reason that relationship has soured. She'll mention that her godlike nature made her important to the Ondrites in her community, but refuse to elaborate, falling back on vague "you know how it is" statements (though she'll be a little more open with a godlike Watcher, saying that she was expected to become a spiritual leader because of her nature)

Banter

Selene has a concise manner of speaking, trying to speak shortly and simply, but not out of a lack of patience: she just wants to be understood. If faced with aggression from other companions, she'll sometimes snap back, but most often she'll just retreat into herself, either indifferent or exasperated. She has a deadpan sense of humor, delivering jokes in the same tone she says everything else, and will laugh at the jokes of others when they're not outright cruel or too raunchy for her to relate to. She seems to enjoy the company of Sagani, Edér and Kana the most, having long conversations with them. Her fondness for Edér, seemingly based in their shared experience of being sentenced to death by their god and her admiration of his ability to find light in the world despite his hardships, seems to be deeper than she lets on; in one of their conversations, she asks him whether he'd like her to remove some of his Saint's War memories, a process that (unbeknownst to Edér, but known to the Watcher) is painful to her. He rejects her offer.

Companion quest: Still Waters

(if recruited at Webb's request) Selene, a cipher with a mysterious past, has killed several people in Defiance Bay. The ciphers of Dunryd Row brought her back from the brink of insanity, and I have agreed to take her into my party to make sure this never happens again.

(if recruited in Act 3) Selene, a cipher with a mysterious past, has killed several people in Defiance Bay. The ciphers of Dunryd Row brought her back from the brink of insanity, and now she wishes to avenge their deaths. I have agreed to help her, but I should keep an eye on her in case she relapses.

Tasks:

- Travel with Selene for some time

Selene's quest functions similarly to Durance's and Grieving Mother's, in that it advances through cutscenes that trigger when resting with her in the party. Once you have triggered all three cutscenes, a special visitor will arrive in Caed Nua, and dealing with them will resolve the quest.

Like many other companions, in interactions with Selene during her quest (and maybe in some Selene-prompted conversations), you can sway her towards one of two values: in this case, connection versus isolation. To sway her towards connection, the Watcher has to be supportive and stress that Selene doesn't have to face her struggles alone, and encourage her to care about others; to sway her towards isolation, remain indifferent or suggest that Selene can minimize her suffering from other people's thoughts by spending her time away from other people and/or emotionally distancing herself from them.

Cutscene 1: on the first rest with Selene in the party, the Watcher suddenly wakes up from a nightmare to find her standing over them, having woken them up with her mind. She explains that their thoughts were painful and kept her from falling asleep; the Watcher can express gratitude, remain indifferent or ask why hasn't she killed them like she did the other suffering people. Regardless of their reaction, Selene will explain that back in Defiance Bay, her judgement was clouded by pain and that she wants the Watcher to know she's not a danger to them. If the Watcher asks how it felt to be in the city, Selene will refuse to explain, saying that she wouldn't wish this feeling on her enemy. The scene ends with her offering to put the Watcher back to sleep with her powers; if they accept, they drift off into a peaceful dream of a moonlit ocean shore.

Cutscene 2: The Watcher finds Selene at the edge of camp, staring off into the woods with a lost expression. If asked, she will explain that there's a dying deer not far from the camp, and she's keeping it company. The Watcher can approve of it, mock her, stand with her in silence, or offer to go look for the deer. Selene will say that it's not necessary, and then announce that the deer has died. The conversation then turns to her feeling the pain of others, and, feeling vulnerable in the aftermath of sharing an animal's last moments, Selene will talk about how her cipher powers awakened when she was an Ondrite acolyte, and how she was tasked with taking people's painful memories away until her mind couldn't handle it. Her fellow Ondrites tried to put her out of her misery, then, but she escaped and lived for decades more with a broken mind. She will then ask the Watcher whether they think that was the right choice, giving them an opportunity to argue either for death as a mercy or for clinging to existence even when it hurts, or to argue the more neutral point that every person should be allowed to choose that for themselves (which Selene clearly wasn't).

Cutscene 3: As the Watcher sleeps, they find themselves pulled out of their dream and into Selene's. There, they see the temple she grew up in, and follow a phantom version of her around until it leads them past a closed door with a cold, terrible feeling radiating from it. Upon opening the door, the Watcher will see the events of the night when Selene's fellow priests tried to ritually drown her "to return her to Ondra" play out: Selene walks into the chamber, expecting a parting ceremony as she's been told that the temple has allowed her to leave, finds four priests waiting there for her, forcing her into the pool in the middle of the room. She kills them with her mind and runs outside. When all is done, present day Selene will appear next to them and comment that this was the first time she'd ever taken a life with her mind, or at all. The Watcher can express sympathy, callousness or indifference, and then has an opportunity to question her more about her past and her recovery. The conversation ends with Selene confessing that on that day, the whole world has shrunk to the size of this room for her: here, her family betrayed her, and though she didn't let them kill her, she had to lose them instead. The Watcher has an opportunity to argue either that Selene shouldn't put her faith in people blindly, or that, though what the priests did was horrible, there are people out there who would support her.

Special Visitor: after the third cutscene, an Ondrite Acolyte will arrive at Caed Nua. Impatient, the Acolyte will approach the Watcher at the gates of Caed Nua, explaining that they are a missionary sent from their temple in The White That Wends to spread their faith in the Dyrwood. At that point, they will notice Selene, either in the Watcher's party or coming over to greet them, and be shocked. They cry out, calling her Saint Sigrun and expressing their confusion at seeing her in the flesh, as it's known that she has ascended. Selene then speaks into the Watcher's mind, explaining what they can probably piece together themselves: that the Acolyte came from her community and that Selene's escape was apparently never solved, and now she sees that her people believe her disappearance to be Ondra's miracle. She's shaken, and the Watcher can feel her composure start to crack through their telepathic connection. At this point, they can either pressure her to steel herself (earning Isolation points) or reach out and support her (earning Connection points), all the while they and Selene stumble through trying to construct a plausible explanation for why she's here and not "ascended". Eventually, it becomes clear that her presence in Caed Nua can't be handwaved away, and Selene faces a choice: tell the Acolyte the truth (which will surely find its way back to her people, letting them know she's alive) or erase their memory of the encounter. The former earns Connection points and the latter earns Isolation points, but it's possible to let her erase the Acolyte's memory and still end the game with a high Connection score. This will finish Selene's companion quest, as one way or the other she will have come to terms with her place in the world.

Endings

If Selene's Isolation score is higher than her Connection score: once her quest for vengeance is fulfilled, she walks into the woods of Eir Glanfath, never to be seen again.

If Selene's Connection score is higher: she returns to Defiance Bay and joins forces with Kurren to rebuild Dunryd Row, determined to not let the legacy of those who helped her fade away.

(bonus) If her Connection score is higher and every one of her banters with Edér was triggered: it's mentioned that Selene regularly rides out of town to meet up with someone. She never tells anyone where she's going, but Kurren once managed to track her down and saw her walk into a tavern side by side with a familiar straw-haired man.

Bonus content: The White March

(spoilers! people who haven't finished TWM2, avert your eyes)

Taking Selene with you to The White March for part 2 of the DLC yields you an entire additional storyline. The Low Tide's situation reminds her of her own; she will be more or less vague about it depending on how much you have advanced her personal quest, but Ondra's general presence will deeply unsettle her. Learning about the murder of Abydon has a strange effect on her, seemingly evoking both schadenfreude and dread; in addition, if Selene is present, Ondra will address her personally, accusing her of shirking her duty to her (an accusation that hits different if you already know that Selene was supposed to be sacrificed).

If her Isolation acore is high, after defeating the kraken Selene will ask the Watcher to let her stay behind and strike the crystal, saying that she's tired of fighting against her fate. If the Watcher refuses, she'll try to use her powers to force them to hand the hammer over to her; successfully resisting requires passing a high Resolve, Intellect or Might check. This only affects whether you get to choose who stays behind; the criteria for Selene's survival are the same as any other companion, and if she strikes the crystal and survives, you'll get additional dialogue with her where she seems shaken, but weirdly invigorated by the experience, delighted by the fact that Ondra couldn't claim her after all.

Deadfire

If Selene survives the events of POE1 and gets her "connected" ending, she'll be with you on the Defiant at the beginning of the game, having helped Edér charter the boat, keeping an eye on the state of the Watcher's soul.

[astraphone]

oh by the way i’m like 2/3 of the way through pillars of eternity 1 and. hate the combat LOVE everything else

[astraphone]

poe dump now i should finish some of these wips lmao

also:

[astraphone]

had such a vivid dream about going back to school that i woke up and cold emailed a professor. this is the devil talking but unfortunately i AM listening

[astraphone]

How old were you at the lowest point in your life? Reblog this and put it in the tags, plus your current age maybe. I'm trying to see something.

[astraphone]

wip..... sunday

was tagged for wip wednesday by @askweisswolf and am.... just now getting to it, oops. here's some suvira aeducan introspection post-landsmeet.

Between the pair of them, Alistair had known more about their order. He’d been the one to sit up with her after she’d awoken, screaming, from the very first dream she’d ever had. He’d been the one to explain the Warden’s death sentence, to share a drink with her as she’d realized that her escape from the Deep Roads those months ago would only be a temporary one in the end. He’d been the one to tell her stories of their fallen comrades, the Grey Wardens who hadn’t survived long enough for her to know them. She’d never imagined doing this without him. There had been a brief moment, when Riordan had spoken up to stay her hand at the Landsmeet, that Suvira had allowed herself to think, maybe this is where it starts. An exiled kinslayer, a war hero turned traitor, and the about-to-be-crowned king of Ferelden; maybe, from the three of them, the Wardens might grow again. Then she’d seen the look on Alistair’s face, and everything had fallen apart. Now there are two Grey Wardens in camp again, Riordan gone off to chase the darkspawn army on his own and Alistair gone off to rule Ferelden and rage against Suvira’s betrayal. Suvira and Loghain, then, are left to organize an army. She’d wanted Alistair and Anora on the throne. She’d arranged it herself. And she’d wanted to recruit Loghain from the minute she realized it was an option. She’d gotten everything she asked for from the Landsmeet, really—at the cost of her comrade-in-arms, her second-in-command, her best friend. She’s made bigger sacrifices, but it stings nonetheless.

idk if it's socially unacceptable tag people for wip wednesday not on wednesday??? but tagging @redwayfarers and @ghostwise, we're halfway to wednesday anyway so consider it a tag for next week if you want <3