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Diogenes to Alexander the Great, 336 A.D.

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I finally finished the Walouija board

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you fucked with the wrong valley

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Below 5'10? Hark, have a found a tiny little person oncemore?! Grovel at my 6'2 stature, small figure!

bendth down yonder and fight as a man, thou art delusional from thou lack of oxygen up in thee clouds

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I had a British nightmare the other night. I was on holiday at a quaint British beach community (Cheeky Cornwall) and decided to go take a tour of the town. I got lost on the way and ended up in a theme park version of Victorian London. There was a parade going through main street, populated by 10ft tall grotesque puppet versions of British character actors. I was cornered by a salivating Brendan Gleeson. Someone from the crowd yelled “oh no, here comes The Sucker!”. He opened his lamprey mouth

Brendan Gleason is Irish you damn imperialist. You deserved to be sucked into his lamprey mouth.

I had an American nightmare once where I’d moved to New York and all the shops were really shit and didn’t stock anything I wanted.

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How do you feel about America Tumblr Children discovering Snufkin exactly three weeks ago and immediately wanting to fuck him?

In the age of Hunks Called Chris it is a terrible waste of man-meat to lust over a Swedish cartoon when it is a scientific fact that no one in Sweden has ever fucked

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If you’re a reasonably attractive girl who wants to fuck a lot of guys, life must feel like a video game on its easiest level of difficulty.

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Ancient Greek Punishment: UI Edition is an odd little experience that allows you to reenact the punishments bestowed by ancient Greek gods in UI form!

Read More & Play The Full Game, Free (Browser)