awesomehudson-blog

[awesomehudson-blog]

[awesomehudson-blog]

[awesomehudson-blog]

everyone says you can always restart. that your future isn't forgotten, just sort of misplaced. they name actors and singers and authors who started at 46, 59. they cite chappell roan's 10 years. they tell you to push and push, that some day you'll open a door and the truth will be behind it.

but what if you aren't a celebrity in sheep's clothing. what if you're just a normal person. most people aren't exceptionally talented or else talent wouldn't be exceptional - right? what if you're just another median person; not ever startlingly bad nor terrifyingly good.

you put the shopping carts back and you walk your dog and you write poems on the internet. you have grown a plant or two; killed a few others. you did okay, overall, and you've been okay most of your life. not valedictorian, but you were a smart kid. you had some hard knocks, but you got up again. your life is just - average. you probably will never sing onstage at coachella. most of the time you are at peace with that - someone needs to drive the speed limit. life isn't about extraordinary circumstances, it's just about building a life you love and figuring out how to live in it.

but you would like to feel as if you'd found "the answer." everyone else seems to have some kind of talent they are born nesting in - and meanwhile you just exist. is that why you cycle through crafts and hobbies and activities like a roulette wheel? are you waiting for the moment where it turns out - all this time, you've been a visionary. a genius. all this time, you were special. someone who has-never-been.

crawling up your throat: something bitter and savage. not quite a feeling of wasted potential. after all, you need to first have potential in order to waste it.

[awesomehudson-blog]

How baby elephants sleep...

🐘

[awesomehudson-blog]

Which is your favorite ?

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“The word psyche means two things in Greek… Two very different but interesting things. Butterfly and soul. But when you stop and think about it carefully, butterfly and soul aren’t so different, after all, are they? A butterfly starts out as a caterpillar, an ugly sort of earthbound, wormy nothing, and then one day the caterpillar builds a cocoon, and after a certain amount of time the cocoon opens and out comes the butterfly, the most beautiful creature in the world. That’s what happens to souls as well… They struggle in the depths of darkness and ignorance, they suffer through trials and misfortunes, and bit by bit they become purified by those sufferings, strengthened by the hard things that happen to them, and one day, if the soul in question is a worthy soul, it will break out of its cocoon and soar through the air like a magnificent butterfly.”

— Paul Auster, 4 3 2 1

[awesomehudson-blog]

the risk is an honor

[awesomehudson-blog]

I try and I fail. Unlike you I know I tried. Then I go to sleep knowing I did all I could and that's whatever I got. No "maybe ifs". Just raw failed efforts and lessons and that's how rich my tomorrows are when they come . For I don't live my life based on mybes. Try and fail. And you will be sure of trying again. No one is sure. We all try,fail and triumph eventually.

~leafycontemplation

[awesomehudson-blog]

@redpi11 // Anaïs Nin // @kfkx // Jennifer Willoughby, "The Sun is Still a Part of Me" // Jorge Luis Borges, "A New Refutation of Time" // Euripides, Medea (trans. Oliver Taplin) // Jenny Slate, Little Weirds // Keaton St. James, "September Affirmation (Don't Be Afraid)" // @kfkx // Czeslaw Milosz, "Late Ripeness" (trans. Robert Haas)

[awesomehudson-blog]

Nobody is superior, nobody is inferior, but nobody is equal either. People are simply unique, incomparable. You are you, I am I. I have to contribute my potential to life; you have to contribute your potential to life. I have to discover my own being; you have to discover your own being.

Osho

[awesomehudson-blog]

just… learn to change the oil in your car, know how to darn a hole in your favorite sweater, take no for an answer sometimes, accept when you don’t know something, think critically, discern when to stand up for yourself and when to back down, possess integrity, hold yourself gracefully, be comfortable w eating alone and even more comfortable w being put in awkward positions, develop rituals and habits, observe as much as but hopefully more than you judge, talk freely but listen actively, if you offer unsolicited advice be willing to also receive it, apologize for interrupting I don’t care if you grew up culturally doing that it’s respectful to maintain awareness of the world you weren’t raised in, shop w a grocery list rather than by the seat of your pants, pick your friends up from and drop them off at the airport, have hobbies that hone your craft, speaking of honing your craft: take your creativity seriously by continuously challenging and sharpening it, this one can be endlessly trying but working to cultivate a healthy relationship w what troubles you rather than resorting to castigating yourself upon approaching that which is unfamiliar, never show up empty handed to someone’s home for the first time, and help them clean up at the end of the evening, but leave as soon as you start wanting to go home so you don’t tinge the otherwise enjoyable time you had w irritation, date yourself, do the dishes before bed, also make your bed every morning, and clean parts of your home everyday, always seek knowledge beyond traditional education, move your body as much as it allows so you may sustain some sort of secure relationship w it as you age, judge the capacity as much as you do the intent, have a curiosity-driven mindset, know that you and the world you live in are mutable, value different perspectives but remain steadfast in your principals and beliefs, write by hand as much as you type, take initiative without prompting, seek help when and where necessary, learn to be financially literate, have friends who are significantly older than you (some of my dearest friends are in their 50s and 70s), learn from failures and setbacks by acknowledging and growing beyond your limitations, be the friend you wish(ed) you had by building and maintaining meaningful connections, embrace opportunities for personal and professional growth, recognize both the importance of compromise and when to choose discord over maintaining the peace, express gratitude regularly

[awesomehudson-blog]

Dreams are not made real by sketching them in the clouds or in the stars. They are made tangible by walking on the earth, planting actions in its soil and practicing what is desired. Let us be action, not just flattering thoughts and words.

Los sueños no se hacen realidad esbozándolos en las nubes ni en las estrellas. Se hacen palpables caminando sobre la tierra, plantando acciones en su suelo y practicando lo que se desea. Seamos acción, no sólo pensamientos y palabras lisonjeras.

[awesomehudson-blog]

We don't see what we see, we see what we are. Only those who have beauty within themselves see the beauty of the world. Rubem Alves

Não vemos o que vemos, vemos o que somos. Somente quem tem beleza dentro de si vê a beleza do mundo. Rubem Alves

[awesomehudson-blog]

As time passed. . .

"One accepts after some time, and learn the subtle difference between holding a hand and imprison a soul, and one accepts that love does not grow by having sex.

That love does not mean that it will always be,and one begins to accept.

That I love you are not contracts and sleeplessness are not promises, and one begins to assimilate his disappointments with his head held high and his eyes wet, and a sad one decides to go to all his paths to pursue because tomorrow is too long and unsafe to maintain and future plans are shaped like clouds and tend to fall in the middle of nowhere.

And after a while one accepts that it is too much, to be always abandoned until the heat of the sun turned to burning sand. So you plant your own white rose and decorate your own soul, instead of waiting for someone to give you red roses.

And one accepts that you can really stand, that you are really strong, that you are really worth, and one accepts and learns. That with each day you learn more about life and you accept it.

Over time you appreciate that being with someone is because it offers you a good future. And it means that sooner or later you will want to return to your love that has remained in your past.

Over time you accept that only someone who is capable of loving you with your defects, without trying to change you, can bring you all the happiness you have desired.

Over time you realize that if you are next to that person just to accompany his loneliness, inevitably sooner or later he will end up not wanting to see you again.

Over time you understand that true friends are few, and that whoever does not fight for each other, sooner or later will be surrounded only by interested beings.

Over time you learn that words of contempt in a moment of anger can continue to hurt the one you hurt, for a lifetime.

Over time you learn that to apologize, anyone does, but forgiving is just, of great souls.

Over time you understand that if you have hurt love cruelly, most likely love will never be the same again.

Over time you realize that even if you are happy with someone charming, one day you will cry for that noble love that you let go.

Over time you realize that each experience with each person is unrepeatable.

Over time you realize that he who compares and humiliates or despises a human being,

sooner or later he will suffer the same actions and scorn multiplied by each tear that he shed.

Over time you understand that pushing things or forcing them to happen will cause them to not be as you expected in the end.

Over time you realize that the best thing was not really the future, but the moment that you were living right at that moment.

Over time you will see that even if you are happy with those who are by your side, you will miss terribly those who were with you yesterday and have now left.

Over time you will learn that trying to forgive or ask for forgiveness, saying that you love, saying that you miss, saying that you need, saying that you want to be a close friend, in the face of silence a memory, no longer makes any sense.

But unfortunately, you accept and understand it only as time goes by. "

—  Juan Francisco Palencia.

   "My World".

[awesomehudson-blog]

Respiro del aire la lozana caricia de mis sueños y el corazón se me sale por entre las manos, baila y corre, cantando a la postre de esa ventana que lo lleva al paraíso de tus ojos. Y no se me callan las manos… ¡No pueden hacerlo! El corazón las gobierna, así como los latidos de mi pecho, que son las voces que cantan al palpitar de tus senos. Esto soy yo, amante ufano de la letra, apasionado soñador que a la prosa se entrega cuando siente que el cielo le abre la puerta.

I breathe from the air the fresh caress of my dreams, and my heart comes out of my hands, it dances and runs, singing at the end of that window that takes it to the paradise of your eyes.

And my hands won't shut up… They can't! The heart governs them, as well as the beats of my chest, which are the voices that sing to the throbbing of your breasts.

This is me, proud lover of the letter, passionate dreamer who surrenders to prose when he feels that heaven opens the door.