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cock rings? aren’t you gonna answer?

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the horseless carriage implies the existence of a "horse"

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This or nothing

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The next Tumblr addition should be the ability to set traps for mutuals. Like you mark a post as being a trap for so-and-so, and when they reblog they get a little pop up of a box propped up with a stick falling and the words "Haha! @phaeton-flier knew you would reblog that!"

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nsfw sideblogs r so funny. my friend we can't talk here it isn't safe.. we have to go to sex world together

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sorry i got a boner when u said something really heartfelt and sweet and held me and reassured me that im okay. theres a lot of wires crossed in my poor diseased brain when it comes to that sort of thing

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The problem with playing smash or pass is that there's a lot of characters which I'm not sexually attracted to but I would fuck in a heartbeat out of sheer curiosity and ego, like I don't find Mickey Mouse attractive at all but if he approached me at a bar and went "Hey sexy, want me to show you my mouseketool?" I would say yes because then I get to tell my friends I fucked Mickey Mouse

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I’m more than my fat cock

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sometimes i struggle to use the word ‘bootlicker’ in a negative sense because of sexual desires i will not disclose here

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nobody flirts like a girl who knows you live far away

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I loved when “Drift Compatible” entered pop lexicon cause we were in DESPERATE need for a way to platonically express “one of us to the other is as a limb to a body; we are a left and right feet of a dancer; we do not need to speak because any one word inspires an exchange of unspoken words that conveys a full conversation in which a mutual conclusion is determined in an instant”. Huge win for the QPRs out here

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