axe-trio-commanders
axe-trio-commanders
In this house we cry about plants (and cats)
189 posts
I'm just here to scream about GW2, that's about it. There will be no organization. All is chaos. I will finally reblog things maybe. Fear me (also I'm in NA as Autumnleaf.9410 if you wanna say hi)
Don't wanna be here? Send us removal request.
axe-trio-commanders · 3 days ago
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i think more people should make their ocs fans of real life media. theres something hilarious about being like yeah this is my character prince blackheart darkness of the fallen shadowlands and yes she WAS a warrior cats kid growing up.
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axe-trio-commanders · 2 months ago
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"a champion past their prime" all the digs at the commander are so funny especially if your commander is like. Not fucking old at all? like my commander is younger than braham. like literally 27 bitch hasnt even gotten to their prime what do u meaaaan. especially when half the people ur next to are like 1000 years old
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axe-trio-commanders · 2 months ago
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"You're losing blood" no I know exactly where it is. The floor. Don't ever underestimate me.
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axe-trio-commanders · 3 months ago
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If this is how I die then so be it
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axe-trio-commanders · 3 months ago
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Official character list
Zori Sunblade
She/her, Charr, ranger-soulbeast, first commander (pact ommander, commander of tyria), one of Aurene's champions. Raised ash legion, then joined the priory before becoming full-time pact commander up until events in LWS3/PoF required someone else to take charge. Incredibly empathetic, wants very badly to rest but unable to shake the feeling of responsibility for Tyria's wellbeing. Very small by charr standards. Orange. Good at leatherworking and huntsman crafting
Seremnis
She/her, Sylvari, necromancer/reaver(as of certain EoD events), second pact commander (young lich of elona, commander of elona), Aurene's other champion. Night bloom, was very close with several firstborns in saplinghood, joined order of whispers, went somewhat awol to participate in lws1, lws2 and then HoT events, took over commander position for Zori (kind of sort of willingly) after certain lws3/pof events, resolved to be co-commanders a bit after zori's return, in lws4. Still figuring out her place and worth outside of her Wyld Hunt. Specific brand of necromancy allows her to return to shroud instead of dying, rending her effectively immortal, though still very, very low-damage (tends to bait enemies into attacking her, very, very high pain tolerance as a result of this). Very good chef. Very passionately not a fan of (most) dragons and gods. Small.
Enkkioh
She/her, Asura, warrior-spellbreaker-bladesworn, third commander (commander of cantha), wayfinder. Grew up mostly normal in rata sum, except that she decided to adopt a very-far-from-home charr cub as a sister and would not take criticism about that. Banned from Rata Sum soon after graduating from Synergetics due to an altercation with a councillor over her sister, joined the vigil immediately after. The only one to canonically experience the personal story dungeon storyline. Also the primary protagonist for most of lws1 plot. Involved in the background of remaining story (excepting some shenanigans post-HoT and mid-LWS4) up to icebrood saga, where she officially joined dragon's watch and was promoted to official commander soon after. All 3 commanders act as co-commanders in EoD, after which zori is going to try very very hard to retire from the position and rest (she will not succeed). Canonical SoTo wayfinder (and bonking-isgarren-with-a-cardboard-tube-er). Enjoys researching and developing weaponry- equally a fan of learning magic and weaponry from other cultures and races in orcdsr to also incorporate it (as respectfully as she can manage) into her design. Huge fan of trahearne and the pale reavers. Bites.
Lovi Leyspark
She/her, Charr, engineer-holosmith. The charr sister enkkioh adopted. Learned synergetics alongside Enkkioh up until leaving a couple years before graduation, intending to see if she'd be more welcome in iron legion. Soon decided she hated it there and left to (steal) make a secret volcano lab in/around fireheart rise, in which she could seclude herself to create weapons and lab-defense systems (equipped with backdoor monitering so she can ensure they're being used responsibly), and also from this base of operations antagonize the local flame legion. (escaped from flame legion as a cub. Her claws are prosthetic- and also a joint design between her and enkkioh, equipped with sensors, programmable transmitters, and small lasers fit for intricate tech work, as well as cloaking capability.) Does research primarily into leyline magic since it's discovery (attempting to coin the term 'leylime' for the type of holed rock commonly found around leyline hubs). Generally rather blunt and brash, but doing pretty okay on average given the circumstances. (...unsure exactly when she starts interacting with dragon's watch, but her and enkkioh remain siblings, besties, and a force for menacing politicians for funsies). Bites as a fear response.
Varza Snapspark
He/him, Charr, guardian-willbender. Lovi's littermate. Grew up in flame, but did not forget his sister, and honestly kind of genuinely hates it there. Officially, acts as a messenger between flame camps and warbands. Unoficially, smuggles as much info (and as many charr) out of flame as he can. Generally tries to keep his identity (and combat abilities) seperated between these two tasks. (Full of anxiety most of the time. Very fast. Cheetah flavored.) Has an emotional-support jackal that is generally compacted into normal dog-size, but is fully capable of becoming a full-sized jackal for doing jackal things.
Strea Starmane
She/her, Charr, elementalist-catalyst. Zori's dame. Olmakhan, excelled primarily in fire magic in youth, causing some tension between her and the rest of the community. This also further spurred a highly adventurous spirit, and she eventually decided to undertake the massive ocean trek to mainland tyria. Discovered a legion warband and (wettest cat alive) Vallus, decided "I will fix him", and proceeded to genuinely try to do so until the warband's leader decided to abandon her to die in the brand.
(This is not the end. Fic ain't written yet tho)
Generally kind, but incredibly stubborn. Refuses to take literally anything lying down, ever.
Amiaza the Sandborn
She/they, Charr, ranger-soulbeast-scourge?. Strea's sister, olmakhan. Soulbonded semi-permanently to a sand lioness named Sandy. Stayed on the isles long after Strea left, gradually self-isolating until she lived alone in the upper forests. Eventuallymleft to explore Elona for a while, where her magic shifted to function closer to a scourge than a rannger, before eventually meandering back to Sandswept Isles.
Still mostly capable of holding a decent conversation despite the self-imposed isolation, should she feel the need to, but very much prefers Creature Vibes.
Valoaukko
He/they, Sylvari, thief-daredevil-specter. Noon-bloom. Was recruited very early on into the astral ward after coming across one of their hunters, genuinely enjoyed being there. Realized something was going Horribly Wrong at the start of HoT, insisted he go to try and help, and proceeded to near-immediately lose himself to the whispers on arrival. Came back to after HoT, significantly altered morphologically, and with absolutely no memories except his name, as well as continuing, significant memory issues. Fought to survive for a year or so in the jungle before sneaking onto a ship of local pirates, and quickly joining the crew. (He very much enjoys the cannons.) Has recently (undecided on how recently) rediscovered the Ward, and has rejoined it, and is still, slowly, re-learning things about the sylvari he used to be...
Regularly steals things, regardless of actual value. Does this out of compulsion, because it's funny, and/or as a physical reminder of someone he's met, enjoyed the company of, and wants to remember. A bit socially stilted, but generally optimistic and exciteable. Doing his best.
Ferret shaped.
Lasca the Blaze
She/her, Charr, warrior-beserker. Grew up in flame legion, smuggled out by Varza. Determined to make a name for herself out of sheer spite,,proceeded to gather a ragtag crew of other misfits and commandeer an aetherblade ship, becoming an airship pirate captain. Regularly takes in new crew members, determined to genuinely earn their loyalty. Enjoys ransacking flame legion camps, inquest bases, consortium operations... really any large entity that's been cruel to someone in her crew. Has never once managed to stockpile funds between ship upgrade and repair, ammenities for the crew, food, entertainment for the crew, cool shiny things, fun treats for the crew... therapy for the crew... incredibly chaotic good vibes. Will fight your primus behind the tyrian-equivalent-of-an-applebees with relatively little provocation. Will bite.
Olirus Quickshot
She/they, Charr, thief-deadeye. Grew up in iron legion, grew somewhat famous for quick and accurate shooting with double-pistols. Decided to join the vigil out of a genuine want to help save Tyria from the elder dragons. Horribly, horribly traumatized by the events of HoT, to the point where they could no longer accurately weild a pistol, and left the vigil. Started using a rifle and focusing on long-range accuracy instead. Managed to find a job guarding prized racing raptors in elona. While on the job, managed to contract a necromantic curse that slowly ate away at the flesh of one arm. Decided to cut her losses there, since she didn't really like the operation much anyways, and left, taking her favorite raptor with her.
They have now decided to fully retire from fighting of any sort, and are attempting to get into the candy/sweet making buisiness in order to continue to be able to afford food, shelter, raptor feed, and any kind of treatment for her arm... currently still running off of vigil pay, and the pay she got from the raptor facility.
Taggi the Dragonfly
They/them, asura, mesmer-chronomancer. Currently being paid to help Olirus deal with the curse; capable of keeping the rot from spreading further via chronomancy while they search for a more permanent solution. However, they much prefer to use these funds for further researching the various flying insects of Tyria, especially the dragonfly. They are trying to find a link between dragonflies and the Dragons, as well as how to utilize the dragonfly's flight and vision capabalities in order to make themself the Perfect Hunter. Results have... varied. Had been using their insect powers to just outright steal funds for their research before being offered this probably-legal method instead.
(...there's a couple more, I'm just not really sure what I'm doing with their characters yet. To be added later maybe. Along with reference images and links to other things, perhaps...)
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axe-trio-commanders · 3 months ago
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vexed by the fact that none of my mains would flirt with other characters (enkkioh is aro-ace, zori is married, seremnis would self-combust in the attempt). might resort to making goofy valentines day cards instead...
(........I mean I certainly wouldn't stop anyone from asking what'd happen if you flirted with them but uh. ettiquite n all that.)
(.....maybe i should make an official character list first)
(yea. yea gonna do that first i think.)
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axe-trio-commanders · 3 months ago
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Guess who finally started organizing all her docs and realized she has a whole bunch of wips she never finished that she now wants to finish because reading her own fics has made her obsessed witb her own cbaracters again
Anyways all that to say. Uh. Soon. Maybe,,,
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axe-trio-commanders · 4 months ago
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Hm. You know what, it's time for various, disconnected rambling about Zori, bc I've been thinking about her a lot lately
One of the vew things Zori actively despises is the Consortium. She wasn't around for LWS1 events, so it isn't for those reasons- no, the "Burden of Choice" achievement line (the one with the leyline anomaly visions and the shadowstone) is cannon here
Which makes her first real interaction with the consortium getting a message saying "listen, clearly the priory is understaffed and doesn't know what they're doing here, why don't you use our services instead :)"
Which. As a member of the priory, specifically a member of the priory very often tasked with the retrieval, collection and study of highly magical artifacts, Zori took that very personally.
She has found out where a majority of consortium operations are and has since been intentionally poaching their recruits and employees by loudly daydreaming about how cool the priory is, how well they pay, how diverse their job opportunities are, how humane the working conditions are... either they'll join the priory or demand better working conditions, it's a win-win in Zori's book. She's never mentioned this to anyone else tho, so as far as most of Dragon's Watch is concerned, she'll just occaionally start talking about the priory a lot more for no apparent reason.
(Icebrood saga spoilers)
Speaking of things Zori loathes, kudos for the return to icebrood event for reminding me how much she absolutely loathes every aspect of Bangar's existence. It's the 'invited aurene's champions to the ralley but never once asked about the dragons he wanted to tame', it's the outdated paranoia, it's the causing a civil war on purpose, it's the 'oh so that's why Rytlock is Like That'-
But most importantly it puts in very very sharp focus the fact that they have a similar amount of influence, and that all this is what happens when that influence is used poorly. They've both rallied armies together, pulled different people into a common cause... this is what could happen if she does it wrong. Raise an elder dragon early, close friends, family at each other's throats, blood of thousands upon thousands on her hands, in her throat, drowning her, and Bangar doesn't even seem to care. How do you manage to be the kind of person that doesn't drown in this?
(Bangar is the reason Willow Tree March is on her playlist)
(Janthir Wilds spoilers)
The most recent development as of JW is that, since I've gone and developed them into their own characters, I figure it'd be a fun time to introduce her to Amiaza (her aunt, soulbeast ranger that bonded w/ a sand lioness for so long her skills look more like a Scourge's) and Strea (her dame, elementalist with a knack for fire that caused enough friction at her home among the Olmakhan that she decided to venture away to see the rest of the world, met Vallus, died in the brand, brought back from the dead via brand/dragon shenanigans i might elaborate on in later fic), because having them all interact, especially in the expansion that gives her access to a homestead to decorate and maybe kind of settle down in...
Strea and Amiaza recognize and care about her, are protective of her, and... at this point, Zori just. Doesn't know how to process that anymore. It's been so, so long since anyone has wanted to protect her and care about her as anyone other than a means to an end or an equal (and she's... not really certain there's a difference. There is, in actual reality, but that doesn't stop her from wondering...) She's just. Really not sure how to... have parents, and she doesn't really know either of them, and she's pretty sure this should be a relief or fulfilled dream but it just... isn't setting in right, like the charging port's just a little too crooked... (until in some moment it suddenly isn't as it hits her all at once that it's been years since she's been able to fully believe that someone cares about her and doesn't expect anything from her, because she can't find a single reason either Amiaza or Strea would. They don't need her, they're just.... there. She knows other people have claimed the same thing, somewhere she knows it might be true (it is). But when they're in tbe guild you're supposed to be leading... but this? This, she can't find an alternative explination for. Maybe... maybe it's true elsewhere, too. Maybe it's okay to want that.)
(More Janthir Wilds spoilers,msome SoTo spoilers)
Since Enkkioh became the newest Official Commander(tm) as of EoD into SoTo, Zori comes along to the big meeting in JW primarilynas an advisor and emotional support- in Priory wear rather than full commander regalia, so most of those present outright don't recognize her. (Gixx does, of course, and it feels extensively off to both of them to only trade pleasantries. Zori hasn't visited the Priory at all in years at this point. Neither mention it. Trying to reclaim that comfort feels like a betrayal to her, somehow.)
She is legitimately excited to explore a new place and culture (she's purposefully ignoring the implications of the Ward existing. Just a whole organization that really probably could have helped with the dragon situation. Maybe prevented some deaths. A lot of deaths.It's fine. This is fine. She is not going to start a political incident today this is fine. (Enkkioh has been lowkey bullying Isgarren about this pretty much since she learned the ward existed. She figures whacking him over the head with a newspaper every time he does something stupid is basically the rest of the wizards' job, so it's her job now too. It's not too different from her experience as third commander so far in some ways))
She absolutely adores the journeykin, though, and immediately takes charge of taming the first one they encounter- she perfectly understands the need to wrastle, and has plenty enough experience with different cats (Kiori (jaguar), Claw (tiger), Snowflame (Canthan white tiger), herself, Amiaza,,,) to recognize the attitude of 'wants to play and forgot other creatures are not immune to Giant Claws', she's incredibly releaved at how graciously the lowland kodan take them in. It is. Such a relief to interact with a leader that makes thoughtful, informed decisions..... (she still has a near heart-attack every time Poised Arrow does basically anything. What do you mean interacting consistently with Ryland who's nearly the same age as her and had very similar traumas had a lasting impact she's fine nothing is wrong these are normal reactions.) So mostly things are initially going fine, but once she and Enkkioh begin to figure out what's going on, once it very... very quickly becomes less a 'cool adventure learning vacation' trip and more a responsibility she needs to fix or people will die (of course it's literally the titans! Of course it's literally the titans and the white mantle and Caudecus is involved too! Great no great this is fine. History sure is a flat circle huh.) And like, out of the people there... Caithemprobably starts to notice it's getting to her, but isn't really close enough to her to drag any sort of confession out of her, Enkkioh doesn't know her well enough to really notice at all... but Malice is perspective enough to notice, and still technically being her imperator, isn't near intimidated enough not to drag information from Zori if she wants to. (She's also smart enough to have recognized who Zori is early into her appointment as commander, and to have kept trackmof her since.) Which... Zori hasn't really considered herself a part of the legions, or charr culture in general, for a long while now... even just Malice still considering her as part of Ash as a base assumption would throw her for a loop...
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axe-trio-commanders · 7 months ago
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I have been. so eepy this week,,, i took this pic like a week ago with the specific intention of using it for this...
BUT! TIS HALLOWEEN!!!
And as my dedicated Mad King's Eve Enjoyer, Seremnis has decided she is done entertaining polite society and will now become a Creechur.
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for the foreseeable holiday, she will be stalking the rooftops, traveling between shadows, sneaking sweet cookies and other treats into the baskets of kids and random other people she thinks are cool
(the wings are mesmer-enchanted to move like her ears... were, but she swears she definitely won't accidentally make them real and functional through enough time and returning-to-a-solid-form-from-shroud. again. mhm.) (...anyways my favorite fashion trick is that if you have funky boots like the rabbit stompers that change how your feet look and then find pants that hide most of the upper part you can get funky bug/bird feet. tis nice.)
Share your ocs Halloween costume!
It's another lovely halloween, and I know this community has some fantastic costume ideas! From characters/celebrities to classic sexy/spooky costumes, the creativity is through the roof!
Share and show off your lovely costumes here gw2 community, and perhaps you will earn a little treat :3 (in which a piece of candy/sweet will be chosen to give to any characters who ring the doorbell of this thread)
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axe-trio-commanders · 7 months ago
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axe-trio-commanders · 7 months ago
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guild wars 2 players please interact i want to be your pal
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axe-trio-commanders · 7 months ago
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Technically, Enkkioh is both wayfinder and current commander, but for the sake of the prompt we'll say Enkkioh, the wayfinder, against Seremnis and Zori, the first two commanders...
.....Honestly the hardest part would be getting Zori to participate at all, she hates fighting unless it's necessary and she's honestly terrified of hurting the people she cares about- at best, it's a two-against-one enkkioh and seremnis slowly trying to get her into it, and even then she's absolutely going to be losing on purpose.
Enkkioh and Seremnis, however, once they're in more consistent contact (around and after icebrood saga) spar regularly, with Enkkioh genuinely enjoying having a sparring partner, and also decideing that dear alchemy Seremnis needs to learn how to actually dodge already, you did not need to take half of those hits- no she doesn't care that you can self resurrect, that's cheating. Come on, let's see how long you can go without taking a hit, you are fast, you can do this...
...in some sort of weird all-out brawl scenario, though... honestly, it's sorta batman rules. If enkkioh has enough prep time, she can take both of them; if not, she's kinda screwed.
GW2 COMMANDER PROMPT:
For anyone who is using separate characters for their 'Commander' and 'Wayfinder';
Which of the two would win in a fight?
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axe-trio-commanders · 7 months ago
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Hm. This is an old post, going through my likes for tech tips (i have got to find a better way to organize things) but. speaking of women and hinges. Uh. Zori. Like- she is desperately holding into the hinges, like her life and the fate of tyria depends on it. 90% of the time. Yeah?
however.
In general, in the events of Path of Fire, zori is having a no-good, very bad time in which she is experiencing the full effects of a relic of balthazar (from way back in that one priory mission of the personal story. I decided that should have lasting side effects uwu) while balthazar himself is there, which mostly consists of an unquenchable rage and being constantly on fire, and being vaguely directed by balthazar's forces towards places of resistance.
Eventually, zori. well. visits the domain of the lost, as it were, the curse is lifted, kind of, she comes back to the mortal realm all new and shiny.
But then, y'know, she and seremnis kill balthazar, and all that magic has to go somewhere, and there's this convenient void left where the curse was.
It doesn't really show up noticeably, though, as the story progresses, until they reach istan.
And in istan, there's this fun little event where joko's awakened arrive at the astralarium, and attempt to take and burn the books that don't agree with joko's narrative
and. well. There's very few things that will get you murdered by a bright orange dragon-slaying war-hating warcat from the priory faster than historical revisionism
gw2 community prompt:
i am starved of unhinged women, so i am looking counting on you to scratch the itch until i get my hands on an unhinged woman of my own. give me unhinged women! commanders, non commanders, altho fem!commanders are a god tier (the commander is god tier period), norn, humans, sylvari, charr or asura - i just wanna see some cool women!!
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axe-trio-commanders · 7 months ago
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love a character that's like. i survived (<- not a brag) (<- this is a curse that weighs on me every waking hour)
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axe-trio-commanders · 7 months ago
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Well- going off what characters i actually have ages figured out for, at current JW year 1337 AE, Seremnis (as local only sylvari in the group) is 12 years out of the pod and therefore youngest, Lasca (ex-flame airship pirate charr) is 24, Lovi and Varza (as littermates) are both 26, Zori is 27, and Enkkioh is the oldest at 29.
Which. Is fun, for several reasons, because,
a) by this timeline, at the start of personal story (ie when zori loses nearly her entire warband), Zori is 14. There are only two years between this and Zhaitan's defeat. Zori is the first commander.
b) Enkkioh, despite being a smallish asura and Lovi being a pretty tall charr, still calls Lovi her 'little sister' due to the age difference, and also because they both think it's funny
c) I have decided that Janthir Wilds will be a Zori and Enkkioh expansion, as Zori will immediately want to Explore New Place, and Enkkioh is both the new commander and the wayfinder
d) Despite having had plenty of personal interaction with seremnis and destiny's edge, Enkkioh has, up to this point, only ever really interacted with Zori during EoD, where zori was either a) in recovery from serious injury, b) in strategic Commander/Politics mode, or c) doing all that heckin wild, absurdly magical flashy stuff near the end. They have never held a casual conversation. Therefore, Enkkioh's main impression so far is from being in the Pact, and hearing stories of bravery and justice and an unconquerable will fighting the elder dragons, a long and distinguished legacy to live up to and uphold.
e) Malice keeps calling Zori 'cub'.
f) Zori, original commander, co-founder of the Pact, slayer of dragons and gods, is only 1 year older than Enkkioh's little sister.
suddenly got curious: who are your in-universe youngest and oldest characters? if you want to adjust for sylvari ages, i don't mind either way!
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axe-trio-commanders · 7 months ago
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oh oh oh yes good I get to tell this story again
So Zori is a ranger. She was also very over-emotional as a cub and got easily attached to any number of things (i say like that ever changed), including the ruins she grew up around, any other cub that would talk to her, and the local animals.
She's eventually basically adopted, pretty late (relatively) into cubhood, into a band of other charr that hadn't really been able to find a 'band- and they get along great, and Zori's so happy to not have to worry about this anymore, but they can't figure out a good warband name.
Zori, off the top of her head, comes up with the idea for the 'Sun' warband, and everyone loves it. Bright, distracting, powerful, hotter flames than even the flame legion (who they're going to beat up)! It's perfect!
.......and Zori simply never tells them that she got her warband named after the grouchy old mousing cat she'd been slowly befriending.
...As for my other charr... Olirus Quickshot was from the Quick warband- I don't think anything dramatic ever happened to the warband, Olirus just decided to go off to the vigil and the 'band agreed she got to keep the name, since they got along well. Quick shot specifically bc one of her (earlier) feats was being able to quickly and accurately fire with dual pistols.
...Now that she's lost a good amount of function in one arm and has resorted to long-range rifle fire as her main attack, she doesn't mention her surname much. Doesn't feel like she deserves it anymore.
Lovi and Varza, siblings of all time, have the surnames Leyspark and Snapspark, respectively. They aren't actually in the same warband- Varza's technically in the Spark warband in flame, even though he's rarely ever in contact with his own warband (by choice. he hates it there. vehemently. he does not like his warband.) And even though Lovi joined the iron legion briefly after leaving rata sum, she... didn't join a ley warband or a spark warband. She just... didn't actually know how legion surnames worked, and didn't respect them enough to try and learn- that, and one of her specializations is working with leyline magic and 'leylime', that funky holey rock you see around leylines in like. maguuma and such.
...Snapspark is also rather accurate for varza.
(...it does feel right, though. In memories long repressed, they both decided as small, small cubs that they'd run away and start their own warband, their own legion...)
Heres a fun question for legion Charr Oc havers! (Feel free to respond either in comments or Rbs!)
Why did your Charr choose the surname they have? What was the reason? Was it given to them by their warband instead?
Leo was part of the Echo Warband and was given the word "Watcher" due to always being seen observing the Ascalonian ghosts, and his tendency to patiently stratageize rather than rush ahead.
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axe-trio-commanders · 9 months ago
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#yeah gonna have to go with skimmer on this one#i have ridden horses a couple times in my life. and even on a good saddle that /hurts/ after a while#which i think would b an issue with the raptor and especially the jackal#and even more the springer. my word the springer#you need buns of steel to ride a springer#they skyscale is. somewhere in the middle between flight and that bounding walk#flight is probably... ok? but even then its a bit too bouncy to not hurt after a while#and the spin#and then there's the roller beetle and griffon#which at top speeds i imagine to have rollercoaster rides. like imagine riding the tallest most whipping-around-iest rollercoaster you know#without any restraints.#like as long as you don't crash that's fine and even possibly fun but uh. i am not that brave#turtle might have the same horse problem as raptor depending on how the seating is and what you're doing#the slow walk cycle is pretty bouncy. same for warclaw tbh#but skimmer? so long as you don't do the spinny dismount. thats smooth sailing#i imagine practically you'd ride a skimmer like either a surfboard or a jet ski posturewise#or like one of those motorized diving things when you. dive#by far the smoothest and least life threatening mount.#i will give griffons the second place tho bc if i could get over the fear of immenent death that sounds like a blast tbh#hands would get sore from holding on for dear life but like. worth tbh#and rollerbeatle racers are offroad racing drivere so uh. whatever that level of comfort is?#for bonus points as someone who has driven a motorized boat. skiffs are very accurate!#boats do not have breaks and their reverse speed sucks and the water is Slippery.#also they do that nose-up jumpy thing when going faster#the only difference is no one on a skiff ever loses their hats. or chip bags. or extra shirts#and there's no tubing. yet#and you cant drive a circle into the waves from your own wake to splash passengers#you /can/ drive up and over sandbanks shallower than your boat if you're going fast enough but it'll destroy the propellor#and is probably bad for the shoreline and therefore illegal to go that fast there anyways#do you think new kaineng has to enforce no wake zones
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