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[axulrich]

Axel spots the younger Morgan several feet away, perched on the ledge by one of the many make-shift stores in town, just outside of the dining hall. He's not had the proper ability to introduce himself outside of a smile and a wave and given the still rocky relationship with Reed, there was fair reasoning why he didn't know much about Alison. Still, he hadn't spotted her at dinner, so he extends the olive branch, offering a kind, helping hand. He walks toward her gradually.

"Hey, kid, oh—" Axel glances at the notebook, a haphazard but finely drawn view of the landscape in front of her. Not bad. "Uh, yeah. It looks better than anything I could do. You had anything to eat yet? We're doin' last call right now if you're hungry."

Open: @dallasstart Where: somewhere outdoors One word you could use to describe Alison was flighty. Throughout her journeys she had picked up a multitude of interests, although all ended in much the same way; discarded and forgotten about. This week her interest seemed to lie in drawing, and although she wasn't particularly good at it, it passed the time alright. Her pencil scratched the paper roughly, making shapes that vaguely resembled the landscape around her. She eyed her work before flipping it over to show the nearest person, needing a second opinion. "What do you think?" She asked expectantly.

[axulrich]

Axel chews at the inside of his cheek to keep any immediate remarks to himself, seeing how brazenly Reed responds to his presence, "Communication goes along way these days, Reed." It's a light joke, but the ultimate truth. There wasn't much communication outside of walkies or word of mouth in the QZ, hoping that someone will pass your word along if you don't talk to that person directly.

"I mean, it is approachin' winter, so..." He adds, shoving his hands into his coat pocket and kicking his toe into the dirt, "I'm sorry, man—this is just fuckin' awkward," Axel scratches at his head and squints under the blinding light of the sun, "you been...alright?"

Every time his eyes landed on the other male, there was a tinge of guilt that burned inside his chest. Reed had no one but himself to blame for the way that their friendship had dissolved. He had told himself for a long time to just talk to the guy, to say he was sorry for turning away from him when all Reed really needed was a friend during that time, but his pride was too much, and their friendship stayed the way it was. Nonexistent. "Right." He a spoke a little bit less defensive, now realizing what an ass he looked like right now. "Things have been a little bit slow in the fields right now."

[axulrich]

Axel is no stranger to strong emotions: anger, frustration, fear. He feels it and it lingers, sometimes even consumes him. He isn't the best at processing them in real time, but he's learned to stow them away and manage them in a more appropriate setting, in a better way. He's learned to adapt like everyone else.

But, there's a strong desire aching in his chest that dares to be ignored. It's not one simple thing—not lust or attraction, or a simple desire for companionship in an unlikely stranger, but rather all of it. And he feels vulnerable under Seba's gaze, but not small. In fact, he feels like he could do anything, the power of intensity in Seba's eyes giving him the courage to feel, so openly. He can't remind the last time he's wanted something so selfishly.

"Oh, really?" He quirks an intrigued eyebrow the other man's way, feeling inexplicably bold when offers up the idea that he enjoys being around Axel, that he wanted him there—and how blissfully unaware he was before this, the innocent glances that would have them meeting here, all the built up tension seeping through the cracks.

"Well, Seba," He speaks softly, attention brought to the soft cupid's bow on his and the plushness of his top lip before he's meeting Seba's eyes again, those deviant blue eyes that have charmed the masses suddenly softening for the man across from him and he blinks, like it might manage to restart his rational thinking, that he wouldn't make a rash choice and act of feelings, "I think I'm pretty terrible at surprises."

And the implications are there, their breath mingling with the close proximity they shared and Axel had an idea—a horrible, possibly devastating idea, but he knows if he doesn't take the chance now he would scare himself out of it later.

"But...there might be one thing I can do," He speaks softer now, and he's almost worried Seba can't hear him over the deafening rush of his pounding heart in his ears, like all sense are null and muffled, "if you'll let me?"

Axel raises a careful hand to rest in the curve of the Seba's shoulder, the first real touch he's allowed himself to initiate all night, a gentle thumb rubbing tenderly against pulse of his neck—he doesn't want to scare Seba away too quickly, knowing the strength it took to care or love vulnerable in this world, and he wouldn't consider it that yet, but he can see the spark behind Seba's eyes that have him locked in.

Axel pushes in gently, close enough that he can see the warm specs of brown buried in the deep darkness of Seba's eyes and waits, allowing Seba to claim what connection he rightfully deserved, on his own terms.

TO ACT GENUINELY IS a gift around these parts, one that very few are even proud of. it's something that comes as a suprise to sebastian, even as he enters his forties in a world where survival ruled over all. weren't they tired of living only for themselves? didn't it get lonely, wandering through the world alone? he asked himself that question time and time again and yet -- as the world kept spinning and he turned another year older, not only was he privvy to the signs of age, but realizing just how often he had ended up alone. and now, it had been his default way of life. it no longer mattered what he wanted, it hadn't mattered for twenty years. and yet, in this moment, he has realized that his ability to want had simply been laying dormant. in seba's line of work, the irreparable could rarely ever be rejuvenated. it seemed, much to his suprise, that axel had done the near impossible.

the way their sitting tells seba all he needs to know, and yet, denial revenges every part of his mind. the term of endearment had been meant to catch his attention, but certainly enough room to leave him an out. just in case he needed one, in case the stars on his eyes were nothing more than the glint behind a pair of rose colored glasses. and yet, the closeness is something he finds impossible to ignore -- in fact, it's enough to make him dizzy.

how has he possibly gone without this feeling? better yet, has he ever felt so strongly? the touch sends a shock coiling up his spine in a manner that mimics that of a snake, and while he makes a certain amount of effort to ignore it -- the nature of his erratic heartbeat makes him aware of just how much he'll have to fight to keep his composure.

" ah, sebastian. makes it sounds like i'm still at the hospital. " he hums, eyes breaking from the other's for a moment to gather his words. if he spoke right then, well.. he wasn't even sure if he'd speak with his words. " most people... well, those who's company i enjoy call me seb. or seba. "

who's company i enjoy. fuck. that was the understatement of the year.

the feeling of his fingers brushing against the other's soon sends him back into orbit but this time -- he doesn't know if he'll ever come down. all he knows is that he must take this moment in, commit this delicious feeling to memory so he never has to go without it again. even just the memory will be enough. it's not just axel's words, but the way he says them. they could have been standing directly within a sea of people and without fail, he would know that he was speaking to him. the intimacy of them transcended anything he had ever known before.

" well.. " he begins, finding the strength within himself to lock his eyes with axel's once more. " what would you do if i told you.. i want you to suprise me? " his notices rather quickly when his eyes gravitate towards the other's lips, causing him to move his gaze back upward just as quickly. he can brush it off as meaning nothing, but even then he knows that he'll be lying to himself. after so many years of self-protection of both his heart and humanity, he knows better than to ignore it now.

[axulrich]

Axel stares down at her suspiciously, her big flashing smile turning into something innocent, eyes upturned and soft but always holding that little bit of bite that Florencia kept around—he knew there was no harm in her natural openness to be friendly or touchy, it was something he quickly caught onto and shoved aside. He nods at the different possibilites, considering his options.

"As fun as a drink or two at the bar sounds...I'd really like to meet Rory." Axel decides, noting that it was an honor not bestowed upon many. Florencia light up every time she mentioned her and Axel didn't know much outside of the things Florencia had told him, the ways she's described the young child. Kids were a reminder of the innocence in this world, how despite everything, life could still be created and raised into this mess. "Plus, babies love me."

There was something about Axel that simply made her smile, unable to really fight it even if she wanted to, and she supposed it was one of the many reasons it was easy to be relaxed about the man. "I'm glad the stock is looking good for the upcoming weeks." Her gaze drops to the food as he gathers some on a plate for her, smiling even more when she spots the bacon on the plate, chuckling softly. In her mind, Flor made a note to have the first round of drinks on her whenever they went back to the bar, which she hoped would be tonight. "I hate that it feels like winter seems to be quickly approaching." Florencia was never one for the cold weather, but like everyone else, she had learned to adapt to the harshness mother nature could bring.

"Oh, that's good to know. What look?" She innocently questions, glancing up at the ceiling, putting on her best angelic smile. Her gaze slowly shifts back to meet Axel's with a glint of playfulness in her eyes, "I'm simply curious to know if you'd like to waste some time with me after you're done. We could head to the bar for some drunken Spanish lessons," she pauses, her smile softening, "or you could finally come over my place and meet Rory and have drunk Spanish lessons once she falls asleep. Whatever. Either way, me, you, drinks later?"

[axulrich]

Axel is mesmerized by the way Sebastian carries himself, like there's a reason behind every word, every thought that he has, that when he says something he means it. And Axel knows he's being forward, at least, more than he usually would be. He liked to create a foundation with people, a solid friendship to rely on. Anything tangible to hold onto, but things like this, so fleeting and easy to slip out from under him, he's almost more eager. The possibilities, the chances he could take that may lead to more—of what, he couldn't be certain. But, he knows that the stolen glances from across the room, both now and before, aren't just all in his head. Axel also knows that life is delicate now and that when something is presented to him, an opportunity to connect, he isn't going to let it go very easy.

He tries not to let the endearment throw him off, despite the way it kickstarts his heart, and he follows Sebastian like there's an invisible string holding them together, leaning in when he leans back. But, then Sebastian is matching his stance with a look that sends Axel's mind racing and he doesn't pull away.

Whatever diving intervention told him to sit beside Sebastian rather than across was his saving grace, because the moment their knees knock together in a silent touch and Axel can't be bothered to pull away, he's done. He knows that whatever he tells him will make or break whatever Axel thinks is going on here.

Because, while he is serious about cooking a nice, genuine meal for Sebastian, there's also the implication that they would be spending more time together, alone, and Axel craved that more than he wanted to admit. He smiles at the way the words fall from Sebastian's lips, resting his chin against a closed fist as he stares him down in a silent challenge.

"Depends," Axel replies, "what does Sebastian like?"

And really, he's just trying to see what he might say, if he was over-reading the situation, but he was also curious, wanting to curate a meal around something he enjoys. He isn't sure when his eyes drift away either, landing somewhere between the lack of space between them and his lips, awaiting a response that Axel was nearly about to jump off a ledge for, spreading out a sweaty palm against his jeans to hide his sudden nerves, fingers curling around his knee and brushing against Sebastian's in the process.

WHILE SEBA MAY HAVE been the kind to have some amount of good faith when it came to the world, despite living amongst the fragments that were left, he had come to notice that there were many who denied the good left within themselves. perhaps they found it selfish, or perhaps they simply just didn't believe in it at all. seba had come to learn that axel was the latter. thick skin had certainly given way to kindness somewhere down the line, and the two personalities were certainly competing with each other. however, the light in axel's eyes when seba spoke about his gesture was not something that could be simply brushed off, explained away.

while some had the chance to experience, gain from rejection in their teenage years, sebastian had been far from able to. not because he didn't want to, fall head over heels in love for the very first time amidst the perils of adolescence, he had spent his early years making dinners, followed by school lunches, helping with homework. never had someone subconsciously dreaded getting their drivers license, for then would come an onslaught of further responsibility -- piling on top of what he was already carrying, both at home and his education. and while he had found himself here before, even if he may have been far beyond pining -- he had been burned before. perhaps this was why he lived the life he did, in quiet isolation. never to be hurt again.

but god, would it be so bad to be hurt by axel?

the question causes his heart to momentarily stop beating, previously having pounded at a sporadic rhythm from his ears. when it does return, he's certainly not the same he was before -- and he wonders if he ever will be again.

" sure, maybe it's a different ball game.. " seba begins quietly, never thinking he would ever find himself making a reference to sports. however, the words have left his lips and there's no use overthinking them now. " but food does keep us going. " he's shocked at how easy it is for him to keep eye contact with the other man -- despite the sweaty palms and nervous twinge to his smile. something about the other makes him feel safe enough to. he's oblivious to just how close he's sitting, and he finds himself taking this moment in as much as he can. not just because he's enjoying it, but he worries that once the other learns how he feels, it may never happen again. " to take what we have, no matter how limited, and make something for others to enjoy.. that takes creativity. " he pauses, taking another bite of one of said meals. " ...and kindness. " even if axel hadn't bore those intentions when initially arriving in dallas — there was a reason why people grew overtime, either a something or a someone.

maybe it meant something — that axel brought out such confidence in him. such a debonair feeling of strength raced through every fiber of his skin, even if at times the words didn’t reflect it. “ it’s simply just the truth, cariño. “ he nods, leaning a bit backwards into his chair. when making reference to the other, he thinks carefully about his word choice. his habit for calling others love threatened to rear its head at he sat there and for some reason, it felt like too much.

at the mention of the axel special, he leans forward in curiosity.. maybe also because he enjoys the thought of being closer to the other. “ axel special, hmm? and what does that entail? “

[axulrich]

Axel hated the days where he helmed the kitchen alone in the morning, another added stressor on top of the many, preparing food for the soldiers and bounty hunters, it allows him a small break before the rush of people in the QZ ready for breakfast to start their day. He's humming something to himself, a song that has stuck with him for years and keeps his mind busy, but then he hears a familiar voice around the corner that has him tensing in his spot, almost wondering if he'd imagined it.

He leans around the corner with a curious eyes before they land on Asta, someone he's avoided vehemently since they're subsequent breakup—and a bad one, at that. Time has passed, but there was never any resolution or closure, and Axel wasn't going to be the first one to initiate it. Plus, it seemed like Asta was more inclined to attack first, talk second, and Axel didn't blame them. "No," He says simply, "Just me—and I'm runnin' behind, so..." Neither of them make an effort to move, "Uh, you can wait if you want." Axel suggests awkwardly, "Shouldn't take too long." His horrible morning was very quickly getting worse.

closed starter // @axulrich

a riffle hung from asta's back, alongside a worn out backpack and machete, it was time to leave again, but not before a quick trip to the kitchen. not a place one was used to, nor supposed to visit so freely. yet all those years in the quarentine zone earned them some favors -- one of them was from the cook, bob, whom always prepared a sandwitch for their trips. expecting to find one awaiting, asta entered the kitchen suddenly, faced with axel's presence. " is bob around? " they blurted out, jaw clencing in an atempt to hide discomfort. they couldn't blame their ex for being there, yet annoyance was a given. " he owe's me a sandwitch. "

[axulrich]

Axel shrugs, a simple and tired gesture, but there's restless leg shaking against the pavement—he's feeling antsy, like a drink or smoke might help, but he knows the real solution is sleep, though it was hard to come by these days. "It's the kitchen," He says as if it's a statement in itself, "we're either scrambling to feed a QZ full of people or we're being hounded when we get a fresh supply in at the beginning of the month," Axel shakes his head at a fleeing thought, chuckling softly, "you know—always thought I would be a good mediator, but I didn't think it would be happening over two idiots fighting over a couple ham sandwiches."

He glances at Cass briefly, noting her eyes following the passersby's, "Sometimes I just sit out here and watch." Axel comments idly, another couple leaving the bar as they stumble over one another, "It's more entertainin' than you think."

Axel is used to having a high social battery—he's learned to reserve some of that for himself and the people he's closer too, given that talking to people all day can make you want to hide away to recharge and allow yourself some peace. And the silence grows long, despite his efforts. "Man, it's been a fuckin' day." He sighs.

THE MORE THAT SHE thought about such a statement, the more cass realized just how melodramatic it sounded. even then, was any fear of what lay outside melodramatic? " sounds like too much, yeah? " cass shakes her head, eyes turning to the ground before returning his gaze once more. some had said that of her before, but she never truly cared. she had a purpose, something that kept her moving forward. the opinions of others had no point in surrounding her. " but then again, we never expected the world to be overrun by infection. "

the woman rolls her eyes as his crack, but she is socially aware enough to understand that the comment was made in jest. the biting chill in the air was certainly rejuvenating enough for anyone after a day's work, breathing some life back into them. she follows her response to his sarcasm with a quiet nod, knowing her mind wouldn't allow in the direction of her own anytime soon.

" it's... going. " cass nods, finally taking the seat next to him. for a moment, the pair watch as others walk by, drunk folk heading home, other unsuspecting zone folk heading in the direction of the bar... it's then that she finally continues. " everything seems secure.. it's all we can hope for, right? how's the kitchen? "

[axulrich]

Axel grins wide at her compliment, over his shoulder as he flips the last of the pancakes on the griddle before shoving the duties off to someone else, gathering her a spread of different breakfast foods, but surely enough bacon to keep her satisfied. "It's the beginning of the month so stock is pretty good, we're doing a little of everything." He slides the plate carefully over the surface and leans there too, a large opening that gave the dining hall an unobscured view of the kitchen and made it easier to pass of to-go orders to soldiers going out for patrols.

"Uh, yeah—after lunch, actually." Axel tells her, "I'm not coverin' dinner tonight, so—" He wipes his hands against the towel tucked into his apron, "that look—" He pauses, eyeing her with playful suspicion, "what are you up to?"

Florencia greeted Axel with a warm and proud smile at his Spanish greeting. Even though it was not supposed to be a serious thing at first their little lessons brought her what small bit of happiness this world had left to offer her (beyond little Rory). "Muy bien, Axel! Fuckin' nailed it. You're a quick learner, and I am not just saying that because I am hoping you'll let me snag an extra piece of bacon or anything," she teased, grinning wider. One of the many things that surprised her about Axel was how easy it was for her to talk to him, and how relaxed she felt around him.

Her face lit up at his question, nodding before she responded, "I'm starvin'. What's on the menu today, chef?" She asked, curiously, walking up to the counter. "Your cooking, however, isn't the only reason I was hoping to see you today," she admits, grinning. "I was wondering if you were free after work tonight?"

[axulrich]

Axel gathers his plate suddenly, shoveling a mountain of food on his plate, the scrapings of forks and spoons filling the tense silence. Axel was sure it wasn't either of them, but a shared unknown. He wants to speak, wants to be the one to ask, but he tries not to overstep when he has the thought to—it never turned out good for him.

"Don't worry 'bout it," He assures her, riddled by his own inability to sleep properly, "I don't sleep much anymore, 'least now without a little..." Axel makes a subtle motion of drinking, hoping that Orla could piece things together on her own, "and some food, obviously."

"Help yourself," He encourages her, taking a seat in one of the two barstools shoved under his kitchen nook's table, "slept good, I hope?" Jeez, he was terrible at this.

perhaps it was because she knew what people said about her. orla was tough, she'd always been than way but at the same time, had a gentle side until she didn't become comfortable with that - it felt like there was no one else to love. it would have been an idea to let herself be vulnerable, the tell people what actually happened but that would mean telling people how she actually felt and that was a no-go. the woman did care about what people thought about her because it influenced their trust; if she was having a hard time with anything, she felt respect would go away.

still, she had got emotional with axel whilst they'd been intimate. orla couldn't identify what it was that pressed against her chest in that moment but it was enough to temporarily break her. "fuck. sorry, i fell asleep." was it morning already? "yeah, go on. thanks." her sentences were short, to the point whilst she remained embarrassed. granted, she'd never been a woman of mass words here in dallas.

[axulrich]

Axel nods thoughtfully, the constant tension of Josh's face never waning, always sticking around. "Thanks, kid." He nods, because despite how important it was to create a solid community, it was even more crucial that they were able to maintain it and keep problems at bay. He knew things could slip through the cracks, that they couldn't always turn away everyone. There were women, kids, families. Axel wasn't privy to that idea or concept, not in this life. But, he understood.

"Ask your boss for a week off while you're at," He jokes, but means well all the same, "can't stand seein' you like this, man." Exhausted, tired, and over-worked to nothing, pure adrenaline keeping them going half the time. Axel's been there, he gets it. But, life moved on despite them and if they didn't keep up, they were bound to be left behind.

Axel feels the night closing in quickly, too. The lingering quiet like a blanket that covered the QZ, more peace that Axel usually enjoyed. His job was done, for the most part—making sure Josh was, at the very least, fed before he sent him off. Bumping shoulders with him as he lit another cigarette to trek his way toward the back alley again, he calls over his shoulder, "Get some sleep, seriously."

Josh listened intently, his eyes reflecting the weariness of someone who faced the harsh realities beyond the QZ on a regular basis. There was a silent understanding between them, a shared acknowledgement of the different challenges they each confronted. "People can be the real wild card, huh?" he replied, a subtle nod affirming Axel's sentiment about the unpredictable nature of human interactions.

Leaning back in his chair, Josh sighed, "I get it, Axel. The struggle for resources, the constant tension. It's not easy out there, but you guys holding the fort in here make a difference too," he said, his voice carrying a mix of gratitude and a hint of exhaustion. "I'll bring it up at the next council meeting. Maybe they'll ease up on the recruitment frenzy and focus on sustaining what we already have."

[axulrich]

𝐃𝐀𝐋𝐋𝐀𝐒𝐐𝐙 — 𝐂𝐋𝐎𝐒𝐄𝐃 𝐒𝐓𝐀𝐑𝐓𝐄𝐑 (@florxrodriguez)

Axel finds that even with everything going on, he could still make time for the little stuff. Florencia liked to pop up and check in on and him at random times and while Axel wasn't well-versed in just the type of person she was outside of what she showed him in their brief talks, she seemed like a steadfast individual with a good head on her shoulders. And he tries not to look down on the younger residents so negatively, he shouldn't. But, some of them and their reckless abandon has put the QZ in danger more times than necessary. Luckily, Florencia didn't seem like that type.

Axel is somewhere in the middle of a breakfast rush, flipping pancakes on auto-pilot until he hears that familiar lilt of her voice over the sizzling of the stovetop and quickly burning bacon. He turns to her with a smile, "Buenos días!" It's the one phrase he's managed to retain since they started their—what started as a joke on Axel's behalf—Spanish lessons. He's a little too pleased with himself as he continues, "Fuckin' nailed it, didn't I? You hungry?"

[axulrich]

Axel has learned to stumble his way through this life off of niceness and necessity, being kind didn't always get you kindness in return, but it was a damn sure good start. He didn't have the passion to help, more so to provide. He's learned that, even despite that world being stricken by tragedy, people still needed something or someone to hold onto. He didn't have a someone, but cooking was his something. He came to Dallas with no intention of anything other than trying to blend in, maybe take a job as lookout or something low-profile, but never a cook. Fortunately, he had the personality to make everyone feel welcomed, invited, and somehow lucked out. He had a natural knack for it and he's been at it for five years with no end in sight. He's picked up a few things along the way, too.

But, more glaringly, that not everyone liked to eat in large groups, help themselves to seconds when allowed, and the few that nearly avoided the dining hall as a whole. Sebastian was somewhere in the middle, always held up at hospital with another injury, another problem. And he's made food for people before, feed them after hours, sent them off with extra. But, this is the first time he's ever really gone out of his way to do just a little more. It also didn't come with a side of flirting, but Axel couldn't help himself. He couldn't nail what made Sebastian so intriguing, but it felt like a collection of things. There was a softness that he carried around himself, an aura of light that drew people in, made them feel welcome despite how mysterious he seemed. And Axel couldn't stop staring at his eyes, the intensity of them locking him in, only flitting away briefly to catch the smile creeping onto his face—and the way he spoke, so eloquently and solid, like there was a purpose and meaning behind every word.

Axel was in deep, deep shit. Because he didn't want to spend a night with Sebastian, he wanted to know him. He's never felt that before and it terrifies him.

"Comparing food to saving lives feels unfair," Axel replies indifferently, "but I can cook the hell out of venison and a few vegetables when we get a good stock," He often pays the farmers in favors when it came to keeping a small stock aside for himself, it was a treat for his days off, a way to unwind and relax and enjoying something for himself, "may not save any lives, but it'll be a damn good meal."

And even though Axel had swore he's mastered a level of flirting and keeping things on a miraculous level of subtle, teetering the edge of teasing and being way too nice, he feels the urge to throw himself full force into whatever game Sebastian is tossing back at him. The subtle tug that pulls at Axel's lips as the words leave Sebastian's mouth have Axel in his grip, feeling the proximity between them lessen, too intimate to be just friendly. "A gift?" Axel repeats, "That's mighty gracious of you."

And there's a long pause of silence, not that type that would make you want to flee, but the building of tension that could snap at any moment. "I'll have to treat you to an Axel special, my treat." Axel doesn't want to other-think things, letting his heart do the talking instead of his brain.

SEBA KNOWS THAT AFFECTION is a luxury in this place that very few can afford, leading those to keep their cards clutched so tightly to their chest that little action it taken to keep them from crumbling under a titanium grip. perhaps it's why seba makes every attempt he can to lead with kindness, genuinely so at that. living in this world, as he believed, may be just a bit easier if he is reminded what it means to be human. if it helps someone along the way, he is reminded what it feels like to be reminded that he has a heart beating beneath the fragments of his ribcage, the tell-tale bray that screams out i'm here, i'm right here. but there's something about axel that makes such reminders all to common, instead -- leaving him fumbling for instructions on how to move air through his lungs, how to simply breathe. while seba is usually riddled with an anxious air around those who've captured his attention, he can't seem to rip his eyes from axel's. it's a whole new world, something that he can't deny -- scares the shit out of him. and he can't help but adore every second that he can get.

" people keep telling me that, you know.. " he pauses, swallowing for a moment as he ponders what to say next. he's never really admitted it aloud, that he's heard it all before. healing people's wounds, sending them out the door of the infirmary put back together -- on the outside, that is. " that i'm the selfless one. doing what i do. but axel.. you're more selfless than you think, you know. you take what we have here, as little as it is, and turn it into sustenance not just for you -- or for me, but for all of us. "

and he means it, he does. if one is going to live amongst this society, they must all become cogs in the wheel. and while some people have other motives, living here for the sole purpose of staying alive -- axel doesn't have to tell him that there's some amount of goodness in him. he's already shown that to him. and who is he not to be enamored with what he's shown him?

the glint of mischief in axel's eyes causes seba's heart to skip a beat, but then comes the flush to his cheeks -- and seba can't help but wonder the last time he saw something so genuinely fucking adorable. and while he too has been telling himself that there's no harm in getting to know each other, relishing in the other's company -- the familiar, nagging voice in the back of his mind tells him otherwise, and only becomes louder when ignored. and yet, he can't run now -- nor does he want to.

" how is it inflating your ego when i'm simply speaking the truth, hmmm? " seba responds, the words gliding over his tongue with a smoothness that he certainly doesn't expect from himself. after taking another bite and swallowing, he leans against the makeshift table they sit at with his signature grin. is he sitting closer than he was before? he doesn't notice. " you've got a gift, you know. "

[axulrich]

"Somethin' in the wind, huh?" That was an understatement. Everyone was on edge, some more than others, but there was always a looming darkness, a constant threat. It's why people were quicker to a knife or a gun then they were words of understanding. Axel sees her posture ease slightly, hands resting at his lap and flexing out the creeping arthritis from holding his own knife all day, though not at people those vegetables didn't stand a chance. "You could say that."

Axel scratches blunt nails at his cheek, fingers rubbing against days old stubble and he shakes his head, "Yeah—yeah, I was." His walk home was a bit longer than he liked and the fresh air felt nice after a day in a hot, stuffy kitchen, "Just needed a minute, even if it's at the cost of my life." Axel jokes lightly, leaning into the levity once more.

"How's, uh...work?" Axel think it's an easier question to ask, given that she's still lingering around and he hated the awkward silence that tend to grow when things stalled out, "Can't assume it's gettin' any easier for you out there."

SHE HAS YET TO completely turn to him -- but the laugh initially causes her fingernails to dig into the flesh of her palm. even if cass knows he's well intentioned, as most are, the woman is not always skilled at hiding her annoyance. coupled with her exhaustion, it was a mix she was most certainly not fond of. despite the differences between axel and cass, she knows he doesn't deserve to be the subject of her rage. she has been surprised as of late that she can even say that at all, with the way the world has been. nails soon leave her grip, arms resting at her side as she finally turns to look him in the eye.

" i know. i know. " the woman repeats, not sure if she's reassuring him or herself. while she's never one to her her guard down completely, she certainly seems a lot calmer than she did during their initial encounter. " i don't know what it is... something in the wind. has me a little more.. alert, and that's sayin' something. " she needs to be ready, at all costs.

an eyebrow twitches at the reference, finding some amount of amusement in the idea that someone would want to get their ass kicked by her. " you sure about that? " cass teases, crossing her arms over her chest with a cocked eyebrow. " bigger men have said those words -- i think you can spell out the rest. " after a moment's pause, she steps a bit closer before speaking once more. " headin' home? "

[axulrich]

Axel was, surely, the last person that Reed cared to see. But, his job choice, given his interaction with the farmers, left little option. And it was a day past their designated delivery, usually someone other than Reed, which managed some of the awkwardness that lingered between—but, here he was, approaching him on his territory, feeling at a complete disadvantage. He doesn't blame Reed for his choices or why they grew apart, but things could be a little more cordial. He had an entire QZ to feed after all.

Axel holds his hands up in a show of friendliness, a half smirk on his face as he maneuvered his way through the field, "I come in peace, dude." Axel assures, "Someone skipped drop off yesterday, I'm just checkin' in."

@dallasstart back fields of reeds farm

It had been a long day, a long week already. Reed loved the routine that he held here at the QZ, the amount of work that he could put into the job he held made it easy for him to ignore the problems he should be facing. He wiped the sweat from his forehead with the back of his hand, gazing over the rows in his field. He was proud of his work, taking a minute to admire the serenity that came with working far away from others. Until the crunching of the ground behind him pulled him back into the reality that he couldn't always be on his own. "What?" He asked before even turning around, facing them now. "What are you doing out here?"

[axulrich]

Axel was the master of avoidance, deflection, shoving a problem away and forgetting about it completely. Luckily, he has one tried and true to keep his mind busy, allowing his current visitor some space. He's used to the occasional hookup, a quick one and done and he's always content with moving on like nothing happened, but he's not an asshole either—and again, he's no stranger to compartmentalizing. It had been a great night, fine even, but things just suddenly went...south. Axel had no other solution then to give her space, so he did exactly that.

He acknowledges Orla kindly, a relaxed smile on his face before quickly averting his eyes to the stove in front of him, "Hey," His voice is softer, thick with an early-morning gravel, "uh, hungry?" Truthfully, he wasn't great in these situations, either.

@axulrich

there had been a time when orla martin had been fun to be around, the natural 'soul of the party' that just kept going and going - no wonder it took her and her friends so long to actually acknowledge the outbreak. now, she seemed to be ill-tempered, hold little compassion for anyone or anything. their arrangement had come into motion as the guilt caught up with her; it made her feel good, perhaps a little too good this time as she was more quiet than normal after, distancing herself... they'd had a good time, perhaps too good and it got her thinking of the time she last felt like that. again, it was her pressing guilt that she didn't let people see. the woman could have sworn she'd briefly fallen asleep for a moment until the smell awoke her. putting on her underwear and tank top, the woman soon emerged. "alright?" it felt awkward, she felt awkward as she'd had some sort of moment and didn't want to explain it.

[axulrich]

Axel is versed enough to understand that however significantly difficult it can be within the QZ, there's no match for what Josh faces weekly, if not daily. He wasn't sure of the last time the kid had a proper day off, or even a solid break at that. "Yeah, I guess if it isn't infected causing all the problems, it's usually people." And not the friendly kind. Axel has seen enough to know that despite how dangerous the infected were, clickers and all, that people were worse. Much worse.

Axel feels ridiculous comparing his daily occurrences to anything that Josh has to handle outside of the QZ, but truthfully, things could be better. "Supplies a little thin," Axel shrugs, "doesn't help they keep sending out recruitment when we can barely manage with what we've got but," Axel chews at his bottom lip in thought, "I don't know—things could be worse, I guess. But, people get upset when we start portioning out food and I'm not about to lose a limb over a pot of fuckin' stew, you know?" This way of life, it made people inherently vicious. Axel was just as guilty, unfortunately.

Josh takes a seat at the counter, eyeing the plate Axel prepared for him with a mixture of gratitude and exhaustion etched across his face. He runs a hand through his disheveled hair, appreciating the effort Axel puts into ensuring he gets a proper meal, despite the unpredictable nature of their circumstances.

"Yeah, it's been rough out there," Josh replies, his voice carrying the weight of weariness. He takes a moment before continuing, "Patrols are relentless these days. It feels like every time we think it might ease up, something else crops up, and we're back out on the grind." He falls silent for a moment, contemplating the complexities of their situation. "I just hope things ease up soon. It's starting to feel like we're fighting two battles—one against the infected and another against other groups. How's it been in here? Any changes?"

[axulrich]

Axel feels a responsibility to some of the people around him, not nearly as many as he should. But with people like Sebastian, there's a burgeoning need to make up for his own mistakes, those more than constant trips to the infirmary with a finger to stitch up or gash to be cleaned. It's easily one of his biggest downfalls in the kitchen, his mind sometimes taking over and offering up to big of a distraction. He becomes lost, lost in a thought that overtakes him and the next thing he knows he's spewing out a fuck with his finger held tightly by the towel tucked in his apron. Sebastian always seems busy, dealing with bigger injuries, bigger problems, and maybe this is Axel's way of saying sorry for using up supplies that could definitely go to people who need it more, there were already slim enough pickings. But, on the other hand, Axel also felt an attraction, however big or small it may be. "I think it's...fine to be selfish, more so at a time like now, but I try," He shrugs, "—I mean, look at you. A job like that, literally dedicating yourself to helping others. I think you deserve to be a little selfish too."

He was no stranger to crushes and he's had quite a few, but this one feels...different? It feels like a terrible way to describe it in his head, but Sebastian is easily more soft-spoken and balanced than most people, at least from an outsider's perspective. Axel watches with a faint smile as the doctor takes his first bite, bottom lip pulling between his teeth as he chews nervously. He feels like he's losing the unspoken battle of harmless flirting, the wink thrown his way knocking him off kilter for a millisecond and fighting back the shaky chuckle by cause of Sebastian's response. And as much as he finds the other side of the doctor interesting, this is intimate.

Still harmless, Axel leans back in his chair now, fiddling idly with his fingers against the tabletop, easing back into the rhythm of conversation, eyes flitting up to glance at Sebastian, a more than obvious flush to his cheeks that he'd like to admit, "Careful, now you're just inflating my ego."

A TENDENCY TO ADMIRE from afar left one barren when it came to confidence, swagger, as the kids would say. then again, he had never truly been a child. perhaps this was why the warmth in his chest as he admired the blossoming smile on axel's face felt unexplainably foreign to him. he had certainly been smitten before -- but it felt like something new had been unearthed inside of him. something both beautiful and startling, but contrary to his past actions -- seba couldn't help but ask himself a simple question: what was the harm in leaning into it?

" oh, this old thing? " he finds himself teasing in response, surprising even himself. a hand extends to gesture to the space -- that had barely changed since the keys had been placed between his fingers that very first day. five years ago. " we do what we can with what we have -- right? in this life... i've come to be happy with what i've got. " it was like him to downplay the effort that he put into putting the place together and yet, he was lucky to simply have a roof over his head in times like these. and now? company to share it with. even when that company made stringing words together a hare more difficult than usual.

stop it. seba wanted to say. stop looking at me like that. the playful glint in his eye, it somehow managed to raise his heart rate without axel having even intended it... unless, he did. if so, it was most certainly working. in order to keep his composure, seba's eyes dart to the packaged meal. hands soon make quick work until the meal is revealed. his face softens once more, still mystified that the other had managed to think of him, with the amount of people must have served throughout the day.

" it really does mean a lot... that you stopped to think of me. " the doctor's face flushes a gentle shade of pink, betraying him in a single bound. for someone who tended to wear his heart on his sleeve, he was sure pretending to keep his cards close to his chest. it was either working, or making him look like a fool. " sometimes.. i wonder if anyone thinks about anything but themselves. even if at times in the society that we live in.. " it isn't always a bad thing. he silences himself by taking the first bite of the pasta, eyes returning to axel's as he does so.

" like i said... my compliments to the chef. " he winks, adjusting his glasses as he takes another bite. after the day he's had, this was exactly what he needed. axel had seen him in the depths of the infirmary and still wanted his company. it felt good to be seen, understood by someone -- when he worked so hard to give everyone else that same luxury. " ...perfecta, darling. "