backtothestart02 - Tumblr blog

[backtothestart02]

Longing stares S1 vs S3

[backtothestart02]

If you guys were on here at 11 years old what would you be posting about

[backtothestart02]

Do you believe the best foundation for love is friendship? – It is rare, but you must follow your heart. (x)

[backtothestart02]

iZOMBIE | 3.06 "Some Like It Hot Mess"

[backtothestart02]

Mind Games - 6/? | westallen fanfiction

A/N: An update.

...

Synopsis: AU - When Iris digs too deep into Amunet Black's underground drug dealing, the results are devastating; memory loss being the first.

...

Chapter 6 -

“I need some air.”

That was the last thing Barry Allen said when he abruptly bolted from his father-in-law’s embrace after hearing the news about his wife’s condition.

That was half an hour ago, and Joe decided he’d had about just enough air to last a lifetime. Funnily enough, he didn’t find him outside at all when he decided to go searching for him, but in the lobby to the hospital where there were floor-to-ceiling windows looking out into a garden. There was a gardener hard at work planting new flowers, and Barry appeared enraptured by his every movement. The guy didn’t notice, which was probably for the best.

“Barry. Barry. Barry!”

Barry flinched and looked up to see Joe hovering over him, concerned.

“They should be red,” he said.

Joe frowned and sat down beside him.

“What should be red, son?”

“The flowers.”

Joe blinked and looked where Barry was looking.

“They’re pink and yellow, but they should be red. They’d stand out more against the color of the building.”

Nevermind that red was Barry’s favorite color and also the color of his superhero suit that Joe knew nothing about.

“Barr-”

“How is she?”

Joe sighed and leaned back in his chair.

“She’s fine. She’s waiting for you.”

He scoffed.

“She’s not ‘waiting for me’. She doesn’t even know who I am.” He ran a hand through his hair when a thought occurred to him, and his eyes flashed to Joe’s. “Wait. Did you tell her? About her memories? Did the doctor?” His voice started to rise. “Did Dr. Bryce tell her before-”

“No, no. I told him not to, that you would want to, and he agreed. He’s going to send all the paperwork home with you when you take her home, in case she has any questions and wants a medical explanation.”

Barry swallowed.

“Right. That’s good.” He looked back outside. “Not that it’ll be easy. Christ, it’s going to be so fucking hard.”

“It will,” Joe acknowledged. “But you can do it, and you’re the best one for it. You’ve known her since you two were children. Since kindergarten, if I’m not mistaken.”

“Yeah, well, you knew her since she was a fetus, so-”

“Yeah, but I wasn’t around much in those early years, was working so hard at the department, working overtime, caused a lot of friction at home, nearly lost Francine when she was pregnant with Wally.”

Barry shifted uncomfortably. Joe rarely opened up to him this much.

“But I got my act together, and you will too. You just got to be brave, for her.”

Tears started to stream down Barry’s face as a rough sigh slipped out of him.

“How are you doing this, Joe? How are you keeping it together?”

“I’m not, Barry. I’m just trying to keep it together for her. She’s alone, and she’s scared and confused. She doesn’t know why she can’t remember things, and she needs someone to tell her. She needs someone to reassure her that everything will be okay and to not leave her side. Can you be that person, Barry?”

But it was if the younger man hadn’t even heard him.

“I lost her, Joe.” His voice hitched as his hand flew to cover his mouth, and he mumbled, “We lost her.”

Joe gripped his shoulder.

“Hey, we haven’t lost her. She’s still Iris. She’s still your wife and my daughter.”

“She doesn’t even remember who we are,” Barry ground out.

“That’s why we’re going to remind her. We’ll show her everything all over again. She’ll get to fall in love with you all over again.”

Barry was numb. He couldn’t even bring himself to nod, to accept that reality. Everything about the situation was so unreal, so out of his control. He didn’t want any solution that wasn’t just rewinding time and preventing this accident to happen entirely, but he knew he couldn’t do that. If Iris with her memories was here helping him solve the problem, he knew she wouldn’t want that. And he’d promised her once that he wouldn’t.

Flashpoint.

That hadn’t ended well.

“In the meantime,” Joe continued, tightening his grip to get Barry to pay attention, “we need to make the son of a bitch who did this to her pay.”

A rage filled Barry so intense that his eyes crackled with lightning. Joe released him immediately, in denial of what he’d just seen.

“They will,” Barry said, looking away and then standing up and stalking to the window, staring out at nothing and everything all at once, intent on what point that blurred into the distance. “I’ll kill them myself if I have to.”

Joe told himself Barry had just said those words in the moment, that he wouldn’t really be killing anyone, but at the same time he couldn’t blame him if he did. This was Iris, and she’d nearly died and had lost her memory in the process. A precious piece of her was gone and might never come back.

That was worth killing for.

…

Summoning all the bravery he could muster, Barry returned to Iris’ hospital room. Joe didn’t come with him this time, said he’d give them space and visit their place when the time was right. He’d wait for Barry’s call.

The doctor was in the room when Barry returned, but one look between the two of them told Barry he hadn’t said a word about Iris’ diagnosis. Instead, Dr. Bryce handed Barry a file, mumbled his condolences and told him to call if he had any further questions in the coming days.

Barry mumbled his own thanks, dragging out the smallest hint of a grateful smile before the man walked out of the room. Then he focused on Iris who looked confused but also flirtatious again. He restrained a sigh. He supposed he should be grateful that despite everything, she was still attracted to him. Maybe that would make the whole falling-in-love-with-him-again thing easier.

“Hey, cutie.”

This time he did sigh. With his mouth closed, but still.

“Hey. Ready to go?”

“With you?”

He held out his hand, and it killed him to see her so hesitant.

“With me.”

Any normal person would’ve asked further questions. Maybe would’ve wanted to know why he wasn’t in a lab coat or scrubs if he was a hospital employee. Maybe she thought he was a friend and was going to give her a lift to her home. In the end it didn’t matter because she took his hand and smiled weakly.

“Okay.”

Remembering he’d literally flashed her to the hospital in the first place, and his car wasn’t in the parking lot, Barry had to call them an uber. He tried to tune out the guy in the front seat, but he still wished he was alone with Iris.

“You didn’t have to come with me,” Iris said a few minutes into the drive. “I mean…” She paused, thinking, trying to sort out what could possibly be happening in the near future. “Where are we going exactly?”

“I’m taking you home. Well, this guy is.” He nodded to the front seat. “But I’m…escorting you…I guess.”

“I didn’t know I had a home,” Iris said, then chuckled at the absurdity of it. “I mean, I guess I just don’t remember it. Which is weird. The not remembering thing.” She frowned and then decided to change the topic. “So how come they sent the hottie to take me home?”

The driver chuckled in the front seat, and Barry had to suppress his annoyance.

“Because this hottie has a few things he needs to tell you.”

“Ooh, a cutie with secrets. I liked it.”

She shifted closer to him and felt her heart explode when he didn’t move away, but the resigned look on his face, and then him looking out the window away from her, dimmed her butterflies considerably.

What exactly was he hiding from her?

…

Back in Amunet’s underground lair, Amunet was becoming quite the impatient one, barking orders at her ‘staff’, cutting Reverb’s deadline down even further, and tapping her nails incessantly on her unbalanced desk.

The sound of large, scuffed boots coming down into her lair encouraged her though, and when the henchman she’d most been eager to see appeared into view, she relaxed.

“Oh, goody, you’re back. With good news, I expect?”

His face didn’t alter by even a fraction, still and serious to the bone.

“Iris has been taken care of. She won’t even be able to remember her own name.”

Euphoria sparkled through Amunet.

“Good. I tried to warn her that she was digging too deep. Serves her right. Now we don’t have to worry about anyone exposing our operation.”

He grunted.

“You can leave now.”

With a stilted start, he turned and left the way he came, nearly running into the pale-skinned vixen on his way out. He grunted his disapproval and moved around her, ignoring her teasing grin and then roll of her eyes.

The click of her heels on the cement pavement had Amunet calling her name before she even appeared in her view.

“Frost, darling. To what do I owe the pleasure? I didn’t call for you, did I? If I did, you can leave. The job’s already been done.”

Frost bristled, not having expected such a short reaction to her presence. Still, she pushed onward, determined not to let the disrespect get to her head.

“I have a proposition for you.”

“Oh? Are we business partners now?” Amunet was clearly amused and leaned back in her chair, propping her crossed ankles on the desk. “I give you orders, and you deliver on them. I think we work nicely that way, don’t you?”

Frost said nothing, only walked carefully over to her and set a small glass bottle swirling with a blue substance on the desk. It was closed with a cork and looked most intriguing to Amunet.

“What is this?” she asked, pretending she didn’t care.

“A new drug on the market. An addicting one. You can charge whatever you like, and anyone who takes it will come crawling back for more. The effects are euphoric and devastating in the long run, but who cares? Once it’s out there, word will spread and-”

“Why should I believe you?”

“Don’t believe me.” She leaned against the deck. “Give it to some poor victim tonight. See what happens to them. If you like what you see, I’ll get you more.”

“Just like that?”

“Just like that.”

“I assume you have terms.”

“Only one.”

“Get Reverb-”

“Roberto,” she corrected.

“Whatever. Get him a better place to work, more sanitation, a nicer bed, a farther off deadline?”

“Why do you care what his situation is?”

“That’s my business.”

She drummed her fingernails across her knee.

“Well, I don’t have the funds for that kind of upgrade, and you know it.”

“Now you’re just lying.”

Amunet seethed.

“But let’s say you were telling the truth; this drug will get you the ‘funds’ you need for such an upgrade in a week flat.”

“It’s that good?”

She leaned forward across the desk and grinned slyly.

“Have I ever steered you wrong?”

[backtothestart02]

Dream vacation.

What is common about all ur ships that intrigues you?

Dream vacation? Venice, definitely.

And well it’s prob not ALL my ships, but a lot of them are either first love or second chance tropes. I like those a lot.

[backtothestart02]

Also, I’m bored. If I have any active followers left, send me asks, plz and thx.

[backtothestart02]

I just updated Mind Games. Will post here soonish, but fly over to AO3 if you want to read now.

[backtothestart02]

SWANFIRE APPRECIATION WEEK 2023

day 6 ♡ tropes

[backtothestart02]

NEAL CASSIDY -> Once Upon a Time, 3.22

[backtothestart02]

Think of it as a long-distance call from an old friend.

[backtothestart02]

Kate and Anthony - first dance vs. dancing as a married couple

[backtothestart02]

FANFIC TAGGING GAME

I got tagged by my lovely bestie @backtothestart02. Thanks for thinking of me, hun. <3

1. How many works do you have on AO3? - 11 (and at least 4 on ff.net, though I had a few I deleted as well, including my longest story on there out of embarrassment lol)

2. What’s your total AO3 word count?

168, 530 words

3. What fandoms do you write for?

On Ao3, it was strictly Gertchase from Runaways (Marvel) but I've also written for Gossip Girl & Harry Potter as well.

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

Most of them are my earlier stuff but there's one that was more recent that people seemed to like my take on a scene. 1. A Place Isn't Home - it's my baby, my first dip into writing fic in YEARS & for a ship that I'd only just gotten into. I put a lot prep & care into it beforehand so I'll always be proud of it considering it's centered around one trope - sharing a bed. lol 2. Lost Moments - doesn't surprise me now since there were lots of missed opportunities for good Gertchase content in S2 so I just had to do a missing moments fic for them 3. Over & Over Again - inspired by the Runaways promo team releasing the first few minutes of S3 before the season dropped & gave me the opportunity to write in Chase's pov which I love since it's easy for me. 4. Maybe I'm Falling - based on the teased bed talk with Gertchase before S2 dropped (which is still a cute scene) but I kinda prefer my version lol And 5. It's Your Call - my two different takes on Gertchase's S2 kiss scene written right after the trailer had been released. And guess what? Neither one was at all like what we got. lmao

5. Do you respond to comments?

Most of the time. Considering kudos are usually the only way I know if people are liking a fic by me, getting any comments on one is kinda a big deal to me cuz I love getting them. lmao

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

Angstiest ending... Well, even when I write angst, there's generally some kinda hope since I like to write angst with a purpose even if it cuts hard. But since you were my home but now i'm (so) lost is about Future Chase reflecting on Gert's death & deciding to save her, I guess that's the automatic answer. But also, Lost Moments technically since it ends with Gert deciding to get over Chase after his betrayal (I was proud of that chapter tbh)

7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

Ummm, basically the majority of them are happy like I said. lol Maybe I'm Falling is the purest tho since the whole thing is fluffy. hell was the journey but it brought me heaven was pretty cute too imo.

8. Do you get hate on fics?

Not on Ao3 since like I said, I hardly get comments as it is. But on ff.net... Trust me, I got some flames. It wasn't pretty. lol

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

Before I wrote love doesn't know what distance is, the answer would have been a hard no. Mostly because I would always chicken out before I even got started. lol Somehow I convinced myself to get it a proper try on that fic and I didn't hate it??? Do I think I'm the best at it? Still no. But I'm not as scared now. It's pretty basic but at least I did it. lol

10. Do you write crossovers? What’s the craziest one you’ve written?

Not with my Gertchase fics cuz I suck at that kinda thing but during my Harry Potter days I used to experiment with AU ideas that never went too far before I deleted them. I remember I was gonna use a Real World (yes, the reality show lol) concept for a Harry/Ginny fic that never made it passed Chap 1. lmao

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Not that I know of...

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

No.

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

Nope.

14. What’s your all time favorite ship?

Oh, this is so hard these days because younger me would always say Chuck/Blair and they are still up there.... I think Cole/Cassie from 12 Monkeys might be my most epic ship tho, despite me never having written for them before (I wouldn't know where to start tbh) And my heart will always belong to Ron/Hermione too. I love Gertchase but at the end of the day they might actually be more of a top 10 ship for me, I just am able to be inspired to write for them.

15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

The ultimate WIP for Gertchase for me is a post-canon fic that initially was gonna be just a simple proposal but then I wanted to include other stuff like Gert getting pregnant, etc. so it could be a mini fic. But I've just never written it because of lost inspiration (the real life drama of the cast did kinda taint the show a bit at one point but also, the fandom's pretty dead too) That said, never say never. Maybe one day I'll do it. There's scenes I had written for it that I still have somewhere so it's possible. We'll see. lol

16. What are your writing strengths?

Dialogue. lol I know it is because that's how I start writing my fics. I tend to write scenes out like a script first because it's how I'm able to start visualizing the rest of it. Rarely does a fic of mine not start with a quote or at least a train thought by a character. I also like to think that when I do write angst I'm not afraid to go for the jugular so to speak because it's meant to hurt BUT I do always want it to have a purpose and move the story along. Also, apparently when I'm really feeling a chapter I'm not afraid to have a big word count. I can't help it. lol

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

The actual writing process. lol It doesn't always come naturally to me. I don't usually write anything all in one go unless I'm truly feeling it. Also, descriptive stuff. There's a reason why dialogue is my strength. It's writing around all that I struggle with a lot.

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?

Um, it's intimidating. lol I did consider doing it a few times because Gert is fluent in Spanish & she was supposed to tutor Chase for it so I always thought it would be fun to tease that in a fic or two but never did. I don't want to get the translation wrong.

19. First fandom you wrote for?

Harry Potter. Because I was obsessed with Ron/Hermione. And yet if you looked at my old ff.net account you'd assume it was Harry/Ginny because I deleted all my RHr related fics. lol

20. Favorite fic you’ve written?

Omg, the hardest question. lol Most of them are all my bbs for different reasons. I do think my mini The College Woes trilogy is some of my strongest work to date tho because all of that is pure me going for it since it's all post-canon. I did research and had fun with the process.

Anyway, I don't really have anyone to tag myself because I don't know who follows me and wants to answer these questions but hey, if you write fic and see this, consider yourself tagged! Also, even tho I haven't written in a while & might never again in the foreseeable future, if you like Gertchase, my A03 account is When_the_Day_Met_Night21 :)

[backtothestart02]

FANFIC TAGGING GAME

I got (honorable) tagged by the wonderful @theartofdreaming1- thanks!

1. How many works do you have on AO3? - 321

2. What’s your total AO3 word count?

1,322,068 words (at the moment)

3. What fandoms do you write for?

Still writing for The Flash, but every once in a while a new show/movie grabs my fancy and I write a few fics for that.

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

An unimpressive bunch but here goes: Muse (456), Replacement Scrunchie (393), Fallen Star (357), Inconvenient Inspiration (343), and Drabbles (277). Muse is a handful of one-shots based solely off spoilers before I saw the eps they were for. Replacement Scrunchie is my sole fic for the TATBILB fandom about Peter & LJ's first date (which was way less impressive than what the sequel movie gave us, WOW). Fallen Star is my most popular westallen fic to date, so that one's actually not too surprising. But both Inconvenient Inspiration and Drabbles are requested (the latter) and spontaneous (the former) brainstorming ficlets and snippets for The Flash/WA. Bo-ring.

5. Do you respond to comments?

Eventually.

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

Oh, gosh, I have so many unfinished fics that it's hard to remember the complete ones that I finished that didn't end so happy, of which there aren't many. Maybe...Breaking Point though.

7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

All the others have happy endings. Go read them. Lol.

8. Do you get hate on fics?

When I wrote for another fandom I did, but not really in The Flash fandom, which is nice.

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

Yep. And uh...descriptive, I guess? I'm def not the best out there, but I do my best and for the most part smut-lovers seem to enjoy.

10. Do you write crossovers? What’s the craziest one you’ve written?

I've attempted a couple crossovers, but I haven't completed any or gotten far with them, usually because there wasn't an audience for it.

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Yeah, I discovered a whole bunch on another website years ago.

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

Nope.

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

In the process of it!

14. What’s your all time favorite ship?

Stuck on Westallen atm, but I used to write Chair, and I was highly obsessed with them as well.

15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

Oh god, I have SO MANY WIPs. One that I really want to finish but fear I won't though has got to be He's MY Barry Allen. I'm just stuck on what the next chapter will look like, and as of yet no one has come forward with a solution. Lol. The Problem is Tony Woodward is another one like that.

16. What are your writing strengths?

I'd like to think I can hook people into my fics fairly well and drop enough cliffies to keep them coming back for more. But ofc the smut helps too. Most of my fics include at least some smut, even a single scene.

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

Sometimes I have trouble making a chapter (or a scene for that matter) all that long. I've seen people write like 10k+ for a chap, and unless I'm crazy inspired, roughly 1-3k is what you're getting.

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?

I actually dabbled in this a little bit for a westallen fic where Iris was learning Italian, I think? I did some research and managed to sift in enough for that one-shot, but I can't imagine I'd do it repeatedly or for a multi-chap.

19. First fandom you wrote for?

I believe it was the STAR WARS prequels, but it might've been The Day After Tomorrow.

20. Favorite fic you’ve written?

It's unfinished, but there's so much untapped potential in my Flashpoint fic. Lots of world-building that's present as it rides the line between canon divergent and AU. Hopefully one day I'll get back to it.

...

As much as I'd love to tag a bunch of people, I can't recall anyone who still writes fic that I follow on here, so I'll just shout out my bestie @simplylove101 who is prob done with writing but may want to answer these questions either way!

[backtothestart02]

[backtothestart02]

Best friends