badtakesandbascinets

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Hittin that Mario Cart. Bitches be callin me Princess Peach the way I run this Mushroom Kingdom

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The Oh Hellos are like The Lumineers for people who make Ghibli edits

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The Year is 2050

I arrive on my chariot at my job as a shift manager at the Steak and Shake Dominate. I push through the hordes of Burger Slaves as I go to clock in at the back. Ave, true to Biglari, I say to the man who now stands in for the timeclock after the Wretched Machines had to be put down. It is a slow shift, only three Burger Slaves publicly executed for Wokeness (Failing to completely finish their lunch, an issued order of beef tallow fries). I return home to my company issued tradwife and my three sons, Burger, Fries, and Tertius.

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Notably, there existed many hoaxes within circles which venerated Apollo on Tumblr, with users frequently making alterations to past inscriptions, sometimes called “posts” referencing events occurring after the initial “post” to attempt to pass such writings off as genuine prophecy.

The tribes of Tumblr appeared to worship Apollo as their primary patron deity, most often under the epithet Apollo Sphairahemon ("Apollo the Ball-Thrower") as a god of prophecy and sport. His name was typically invoked to celebrate a user blessed with uncommon prescience. Moments of prophecy were considered highly sacred and were often recorded, and such texts are sometimes accompanied by an artistic depiction of the god — either his traditional masculine image or, unusually, in the form of a young woman, which appears to have been an earlier style before a conservative shift toward more conventional iconography — preparing to cast a round rubber ball that our scholars believe was used in the sport known as "dodge ball". Much as other cults regarded his arrows as bringers of disease and health, this community believed that being struck by this ball would bestow prophetic visions.

Some icons are reproduced below:

An earlier depiction (c. 2020) of Apollo as a girl clad in a simple tunic and playing with other children. Figures are smiling and the image is brightly colored, indicating a celebratory outlook toward knowledge of the future.

A later piece (c. 2022) that resembles the traditional appearance of Apollo. References to childhood and play are omitted, and the god carries a more frightening aspect; perhaps this icon represented grim omens rather than good tidings.

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One of my favorite pieces of PJO lore is that they canonically had Not Magic The Gathering in Italy in like the 40s

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First meeting (Young Odypen)

I honestly don't know what to caption lol

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Tramp stamp that reads “As for me and my house, we will serve The Lord”

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“Stay safe!” Dude I appreciate the sentiment but I am into guns, bikes, swords, and alt motherfuckers. I am perhaps the most self destructive you can be without hard drugs.

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Joel Miller is so cool I wish father figures who you could feel safe around were real

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Was just exposed to odypen as a ship name for the first time (and in fact the concept of modern fandom culture applied to the oddysey) but may I propose the far snappier “Penus”

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ALRIGHT Y’ALL THEY PICKED A NEW ONE WRAP IT UP NO MORE PREMARITAL

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Reports are coming out that the new Pope won Miter Tourney fighting florentine, an unorthodox style at high levels of the sport in this day and age

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Toxic Yuri

My beautiful wife Vitamin D graces my starving and lonely skin once more. In her absence I was empty, and in her presence I am whole. I rest beside her lap like a stray beside the hearth, the warmth of her light soaks into my bones and says “You are home. You are here.”

I fucking love summer, man.

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Perhaps the most lesbian coded post ever made by a straight guy

My beautiful wife Vitamin D graces my starving and lonely skin once more. In her absence I was empty, and in her presence I am whole. I rest beside her lap like a stray beside the hearth, the warmth of her light soaks into my bones and says “You are home. You are here.”

I fucking love summer, man.

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Is this funny to literally anyone?

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The greatest DM I have ever received

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Raccoons are like if the word Bastard or perhaps Jackass was an animal and I love then for it