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Manscaped should hire me for their marketing team or something

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not my itsy bitsy ass climbing up the water spout again

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a dude came into the library stoned out of his mind and was like, “do I need a library card to look at books?” And I said, “to take books home, yes. To look at them, no” and he looked so relieved. bro was staring at a fish encyclopedia for like an hour and then just left.

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let the slay bells ring 💅

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“don’t cry because its over, smile because it happened” youtube comments hit different on a video about cannibals

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i am going to fucking devour your copy of lego batman 2 for the xbox 360

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raises my hand . professor you are bald as hell. god damn

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queen deltarune was onto something this whole battery acid thing ain’t half bad

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ignore the fucked up emoji please

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longing 2 be good at art... longing 2 express myself...... longing 2 be compressed into a zip file and put on archive.org

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If humans were alive when birds were really big do u think they would be friendly. could we form an alliance and they become our air horses

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grieving as an adult is so funny it's like. im sobbing my eyes out i'm laughing like a maniac im pondering the mortality of everything around me. ok glad thats out of my system because i have a dentist appointment in an hour

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love the gromit picture so much ..... it's like he's saying WOAH