bastardlizardthing

[bastardlizardthing]

I just wanna walk straight into the woods and walk until my feet change to roots, and I can reach the sun with my fingertips and sleep under the darkness of a new moon with the milkyway above me...

Ya know.?...

[bastardlizardthing]

cats would be so fucking upset if they understood they were missing out on the ability to lie verbally

[bastardlizardthing]

NORIGHTSNORIGHTSNO-SHIT THATS ME

Twinks have no rights, twinks are not protected under the constitution.

why are you telling me this. why am i entrusted with this information

[bastardlizardthing]

LIGHT UP HEELYS LIGHT UP HELLYS LIGHT UP HEELUS LIGHT UP HELLYS LIGHT UP HELLYS

[bastardlizardthing]

my brain looks like an IKEA catalogue

[bastardlizardthing]

Today's gender is ON SIGHT

[bastardlizardthing]

It is,,, Time.

[bastardlizardthing]

Y'all I found my dads account on here😅😅

I always knew but man,,,

[bastardlizardthing]

gay minecraft

[bastardlizardthing]

ah. countertops. the gay chairs

[bastardlizardthing]

the cowboy guy and the greek soldier from night at the museum are quite possibly the only respectable ship i think

[bastardlizardthing]

[bastardlizardthing]

today's gender is anarchy.

[bastardlizardthing]

God I wish it were wading time

me, anytime i see a large river: Wading Time

[bastardlizardthing]

today's gender is a proud 'x' because the state DMV is adding a nonbinary option!!!

[bastardlizardthing]

Me: *watching people argue about whether 0 is a number wondering what they'd do about all the imaginary numbers*

Every single odd number has an “e” in it.

[bastardlizardthing]

One time I had a dream where I wanted to propose to my long time gf (apply below) where we had our first date (Denny's) but when I proposed she said that she hated me.

I was, understandably, pretty shocked but then she pulled our HER ring box and was visibly annoyed that I beat her by 10 minutes

In the end we both said yes and everybody cheered and we got free dessert(which was another part of my plan to propose at Denny's)

Who can I find to treat me like this?

@dennys if I proposed here would I get free dessert?