battyshitposts - Tumblr blog

[battyshitposts]

me and my mom: having a normal conversation

the song playing in my ear: "that night i fucked-"

[battyshitposts]

i was at my friends house, and she has a little brother named Logan.

Logan said he wanted to eat all the brownies and to stop him from doing so, my brother said that he had to save one for Jimmy.

Jimmy doesnt exist.

The rest of the night we gas lit him into thinking Jimmy was real, and that he was just on tour right now.

He went around the rest of the night asking, "Is Jimmy coming back?"

So... yeah, Jimmy...

[battyshitposts]

trying to think of a fandom to write for and suddenly blanking on every show ive ever watched.

[battyshitposts]

im running out of shows from my childhood to insert myself into

[battyshitposts]

i just made friends with one of the people i really admire...???

plus she told me i was really sweet

im-adsjdsdfsdfdsfu

[battyshitposts]

me: hey mom, how are you?

my mom: i think im clinically depressed

me: mom.... 😟

[battyshitposts]

i walked out of my room at 4:36 AM, made eye contact with my brother from his doorway, then slowly backed into my room

[battyshitposts]

a girl started crying to me about how her boyfriend broke up with her, then she asked me to be her boyfriend.

i had to explain that i am, in fact, a woman.

[battyshitposts]

i blame me being a whore on my uncle watching Clueless with me when i was a young child

[battyshitposts]

"I never knew you were gay"

Bitch. I sang 'I Kissed a Girl' when I was seven??