beancatz
beancatz
A Perfect Paradox
6K posts
Girl. 29. Married. American and Brasilian. Software Engineer/Programmer and college student. Living in Massachusetts. I'm rather difficult to comprehend.
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beancatz · 6 years ago
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honestly me as a parent
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beancatz · 6 years ago
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beancatz · 6 years ago
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I got the words "I am your creation and I am proud" across my calves because of this exact scene. <3
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Bette Porter The L Word, s2e11
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beancatz · 6 years ago
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Yo get these guys off a subway & onto broadway cuz this is lit.
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beancatz · 7 years ago
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Good lord.
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beancatz · 7 years ago
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Captain? I don’t think so. I want you, guys, to think of me as one of the boys, so tonight I’ll be swapping out my Captain’s hat for my Kangol hat. Call me Raymond.
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beancatz · 7 years ago
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reasons i love gina linetti 4/?
#empowerment 
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beancatz · 7 years ago
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my perfect crime? I memorize the entirety of the macy’s store inventory. I then go on aliexpress.com and find exact replicas of every single purse in the store. I break in at 3am, and replace every purse with a cheaper version of the purse. I take my real purses home and open up an online store on the darknet featuring fake purses. I then sell these real purses as fake purses, making it so that when the feds catch on to my antics, they spend countless years trying to figure out who can replicate purses this well, and who is selling them. Soon an entire division of the FBI is dedicated to finding me and figuring out how my “fake” purses appear to be real. 45 years later they finally trace my ip address and break into my villa in texas and shoot me right in the leg when i attempt to flee. While this would normally not be a fatal wound, due to my constant devotion to my online fake real purse storefront i have suffered an iron deficiency for 35 years. My blood can’t clot and I start to bleed out. Turns out the woman who shot me was a girl who i made out with once in college, and she holds my dying body in her arms and asks me how my fake purses were so real. I spend the last moments of my fleeting life telling her about how every five years i break into a different Macy’s and replace all the purses, and that the purses I have been selling online for a severely discounted price were actually all real, and I have been doing this purely for the gag of it all. When my former college girlfriend gets home from work after rightfully murdering me for my crimes, she goes into her walk in closet, looks at the 13 gucci purses she owns, and realizes that they’re all fakes.
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beancatz · 7 years ago
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DID “VISIT LAS VEGAS” JUST MAKE AN AD THAT’S BETTER THAN ANY OTHER LESBIAN MOVIE OUT THERE? Y E S
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beancatz · 7 years ago
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I’m Gina Linetti, and I can do anything. Okay?
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beancatz · 7 years ago
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“lol Android users be like-” your phone is designed to break down after a year, your apps are all programmed to draw unnecessary power after 2 years, all your accessories and hardware are arbitrarily made with only 1 kind of plug in mind so you can’t use them with anything else or get them from anywhere else, the cables are 150$ and break in a year, your phones will not charge if there is lint in the port, the stores will ask you for 150$ to remove that lint, the phone itself is 900$
But your chat bubbles are blue so that balances it out right
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beancatz · 7 years ago
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Blugh
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beancatz · 7 years ago
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When was the last time you guys saw my face?
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beancatz · 7 years ago
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w h o a !
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beancatz · 8 years ago
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#domesticatedhollstein
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beancatz · 8 years ago
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beancatz · 8 years ago
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it’s a me, marco
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