beanpodz

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Don’t know if this has been said before but something I truly like about The Pitt is that Mel, an autistic coded (or soon to be canon) character is actually good with people. So many medical shows or autistic representation in general have autistic characters that are clinical and unfeeling when talking to others but Mel is different. She listens to people and cares about her patients. She’s empathetic and understanding. I just love seeing an autistic character get to be human, capable, and not the butt of the joke every time they do something considered odd. Her not getting a social cue or getting overwhelmed is sometimes played for comedy but it doesn’t feel like it’s in a mean way. It just makes her seem more like a real person bc we’ve all fucked up or seemed too eager before. We all had to let out some tension by singing along to songs we love. I just love her

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“i felt that five had to have a love story” okay steve !! fine. i’ll humour you. picture this : lila and five in the subway. they’re travelling to different timelines, loosing hope, trying to find a way home. then they get to a timeline and five sees dolores. but she’s a human, not a mannequin. he falls for her. loves her. wants to stay with her in her timeline. and that’s why lila has to force him to come home. she has kids, a husband, a life. five wants to stay with dolores more than anything. but he goes home, back to his timeline, because he knows he has to save his family. because he loves them more.

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my queer, neurodivergent ass when The Umbrella Academy ends with, "you were born wrong, every bad thing that has happened to you is your fault, and the only way the world can be good and safe is if you are eradicated from existence"

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Five Hargreeves + Text Posts Part 5

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This is pointless but here’s what I would have done for each member of the umbrella academy during season 4:

1. Luther would still be a dancer in this for me but he wouldn’t live at the academy. He’d live with an elderly old man that he helps to take care of in exchange for a room. I want Luther obsessing over a father figure in every season. Sue me. His room would be full of abandoned hobbies (think knitting needles, a guitar with a broken string, a bookshelf filled with *blank* for dummies books). He’d have spent the last few years trying to discover who he is. Besides all of his hobbies he’d have a whole section of his wall dedicated to finding Sloane. If we couldn’t get the actress maybe we have a quick photo of her married to someone else or have that be discovered in the plot. I don’t necessarily think Luther has to have a happy ending with Sloane but he could have it in terms of getting over his daddy issues and discovering who he is as a person. He puts a lot of effort into his family (especially sparrow Ben) through out the season but he able to become a figure outside of his family this season.

2. Diego’s whole deal before this point is vengeance and vigilantism. The life of a UPS worker is so far removed from this but I’d keep it. I’d really want to highlight that this is something Diego does because he thinks this is what he has to do to be a family man. I’d also spend a lot more time this season on his family. Like him cooking breakfast or something while Lila (who I’ll come back to) is dealing with the twins while looking ready to pull her hair out. Lila’s parents would also have a lot more to do to. Maybe they nitpick Diego or maybe Diego isn’t sure how to behave around his new family that actually seems to be healthy. I’d also keep his lil dad gut but I wouldn’t make it a point of humor. It’d just be a thing to highlight the image of the dad he is. His storyline this season would deal with him wanting to be something (a father, a husband) while not really knowing how to do this and still having dreams of his previous life of excitement and action. Also would show drama with Lila and him navigating their new lives and maybe not in the healthiest way at first.

3. Allison would still be attempting to be an actress. But she would be hyper vigilant of Claire. She fought so hard and betrayed her whole family to get back to her. She might even be overbearing. Her emotional arc this season would have a lot to do with learning to allow Claire to become her own person. I also would have included Ray because he would NEVER just walk out but if we can’t get the actor I think maybe I would have killed him off (I’m sorry). Maybe the realization that her new timeline is not perfect helps to enforce the idea into her that Claire is not invulnerable. We’d also spend a lot more time talking about this. Ray would have a picture on her bedside table and maybe her and Luther could have some closure by talking about their loved ones. She would also have to work a lot harder to gain acceptance from her family.

4. Klaus’s would NOT get his powers back so early in the season. We would also not have any of his plot from the real season beyond the fact that he is now a hypochondriac. I really liked that detail. I liked Uncle Klaus loving Claire to death and them both learning to enter the big scary world would be a staple in his season 4 arc. Klaus would definitely talk about Dave more too. He’s so afraid of losing others because of his loss of Dave but he still has these worries about his own death. This could be his big moment this season. Him having to accept his powers, despite his sobriety and fear, in order to save his family in some way. The choice should be his. It would be his ultimate sacrifice and it would finish off his arc in a more satisfying way that doesn’t leave him as someone incapable of saving himself or others. We could also get his ghost army and levitation. As a treat.

5. I would have kept Five as a teenager. He’d be 17 at most and having to live with one of the other siblings (I’m leaning towards Luther). He’s ‘homeschooled’ at this point and spends his time trying to find inaccuracies in the timeline that could suggest another end of days. He’s obsessed with the apocalypse and a safe world can never feel safe for him. Lila still does not like or trust Five because of what he did to her parents in the OG timeline. But because he and Lila are still searching for danger (for different reasons) they end up attending the Keeper meetings together. The whole subway things happens but NOT the romance or the choosing to stay. Instead they both go through the timelines trying to solve the end of the world and we spend like 2 whole episodes on this. They see the apocalypse again. Five gets soft over Delores. Lila sees what Five went through to get back to his family. To save Diego. They eventually learn to see each other as family. And they’re only gone for a year before they both find the Five Deli. They’re dirty, injured, and have just spent the last year trying to get back and save they’re family. They do NOT accept the other five telling them to just die and give up. Maybe Five contemplates but now that Lila and Five are bonded and besties (please I just want friendship from them) she is able to convince to try ‘one more time old timer’. They get an exit found by another five and find a way to save the world (need more thought on how). Also after the world ends and Five no longer has a purpose like before, he finds a new one in his family and this adorable ( absolutely ugly) little dog that was eating trash in an alley.

6. Ben would still have been a crypto scammer because I love that. It’s sparrow Ben so there is still a huge disconnect from him and the rest of the family. I don’t think he gets a romance with Jennifer but he meets her. And it’s learned that Jennifer is not of this timeline but was in a squid that came from another one. I’m thinking the squid is what lives inside Ben and it’s escape is what killed him ( not the dumb as hell thing that really happened). The squid eats Jennifer as she is a hostage in whatever situation (mission by the beach idk) but she is one of the other 43 kids. She has powers similar to Viktor in the way that they are world destroying. The fact that she from another timeline is what gives her extra interest to Jean and Gene. Ben begins to gets realize he’s not exactly a great person compared to Umbrella Ben but begins to bond with them over the course of the season. Also the jar isn’t given to the umbrella academy by David Cross (already forgot his characters name) but instead found by Jean and Gene in the opening scene. They intend to give it to Jennifer once they get to her but instead are intercepted by five and Lila. Maybe they give it to Jennifer at a meeting as a ritual and Five steals it and takes it to the family. Now Jean and Gene are after them and they know Jennifer is gonna end the world. Plot with lots of moments for cool fight scenes and music numbers.

7. Viktor could be living Canada still. He still feels so isolated from the family that he struggles to be around them. I like the joke of him being someone incapable of maintaining a relationship but we know he could do it with Sissy so I would instead have him have a rocky relationship with a girl who maybe also isn’t in the healthiest spot. Since Viktor doesn’t get kidnapped in this version, his trouble involves introducing the new girl to his family and not knowing how to navigate these two worlds that have always been separate in his life. He gets to play violin still too because that was such a big thing in the comics and the violin is something that he learns to harness his powers with once they get their powers back. For what seems like the first time, Viktor isn’t ending the world but saving it. And he is fighting with his family as a powerful unit. Think early scene in s2 where they all realize their full potential.

8. Lila is struggling with her new life. She has a family, her parents, and a calm life. It was supposed to be a life only meant for her dreams but she finds it dull. Diego is showing off a facade of being happy in this life so she doesn’t want to talk about how it’s affecting her. She forms a tentative truce with five when she gets a dose of excitement by involving herself with the keepers. When she realizes she is once again in an apocalypse situation she has conflicting feelings about what this means for her and her family. She wholeheartedly joins five on the subway adventure not realizing how long it would be before she could see her family again. She bonds with Five and they both commiserate about loving their family so much but not knowing if they will ever have the ability to be happy. Her arc revolves around finding equilibrium between her two worlds and saving the world with Five. Someone she now sees as family and who she knows would do anything to save her because she’s family. She and Diego would talk and learn they both have issues with their new lives but they are dedicated to helping each other find what the other needs to at least be content. She also doesn’t ever cheat on Diego and the little Greek guy comment makes her laugh so hard she almost pees.

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Things they could have done instead of the Lila/Five romance plot:

1. Lila and Five continue being frenemies and both form a common bond stuck in the subway system when they both realize they were both manipulated by the handler. Like what if Lila still hated Five for killing her parents in the original timeline. You get the comedy and drama of Diego struggling to support his wife and brother. You get Five having to deal with the turmoil of having to come to terms that while his actions were all a means to an end, they still hurt people. You get Five being back in the apocalypse and Lila gets to see the life he had to live for longer than she’s been alive. She begins to understand his reasoning for doing what he did. You get Lila having to learn to accept Five as family and get through her past trauma. And then you can have a funny scene where Five and Lila come back from the underground being mean besties and Diego having no fucking clue what happened.

2. Lila runs into the subway adventure because she needs a break from her new monotonous life. We keep that but instead of her developing a fucking Colleen Hoover ass relationship with her husbands brother, she actually gets a arc that fosters growth. Her and Five could both be incredibly bored of their new lives but going through 7 years alone, almost being killed and eating rats (the exact excitement they thought they wanted to go back to), leads to them getting their last hurrah but understanding all they really want is to go back home to the people they love. Five wants to go back to his family and finally live our his life’s goal. Lila wants to go back to her kids and actually talk with Diego. They bond on their journey and come to find a new understanding of family and home.

3. They BOTH find the Five deli and while all the other Five’s are telling him to give up and accept that the apocalypse is inevitable while the umbrellas are still alive, Lila pushes him to find another way. Lila knows the impossible is possible. She got her parents back. She found love in a 60’s psych ward. She escaped the kugelblitz and lived another day. She is a good mother despite the woman that raised her. Her and Five have the one common goal of LOVING their family so much they would do the impossible to save them. They find another way to save the world and the subway is actually useful beyond a quick resolution and a convoluted romance plot.

And I think all of these include the ‘little Greek guy’ thing but it keeps the original humor we felt as an audience because of course Lila would never cheat on Diego with Five and the idea is hilarious

Also I think Five should tell Lila about Delores in all of these and the softness and love he has for her makes her miss Diego but that’s just a me thing

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But how were they even comfortable writing this weird ass relationship for Aidan to act out?

This is a child actor you cast at 14 years old, and now that he is 20 you have him kiss a woman thats 15 years older than him? It's like they put a timer on the moment he's no longer a minor.

And they probably would have done it sooner but it looks like he was still 17 for about a month after the filming for season 3 ended.

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2 examples of “things I would be raving about if they weren’t ruined by literally everything else”

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Alright, here's another thought that I'm just going to put out here because I don't have a professional therapist on hand:

Let's for one moment put aside the "occurrence" with Five and Lila. Even if that hadn't have happened...they completely fucked up his character. He was like a completely different person!

Where was the snark? Where was the barely restrained anger? Where was the drinking to forget shit and manic outbursts? Where was the FIGHT in him?!

This was like a watered-down, sad-sack, boring as all fuck, loser version that just magically developed over 6 years? It makes no sense. This was not our guy. Not even a little bit. The dude couldn't even fight very well. Did he just up and forget his entire lifetime of trauma, pain, anger, rage, and martial arts training? WTF?

And I'm sorry, you're telling me that Five Hargreeves just goes about his job at the CIA, taking orders from some boss dude like a normal Joe Shmoe on the street? Oh, and also he didn't even notice that his boss had a fucking umbrella tattoo this entire time? Luther saw it in 5 fucking seconds! This is Five! One of the most observant, paranoid, and in-your-face people to have walked the planet. And he's just...not now? I wish he had ended up coming across all the previous seasons' versions of himself and they all kicked his ass. Which wouldn't be very hard, apparently.

Jesus Christ! Ok, sorry...I think I'm done now.

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okay, but it's almost funny to see Steve Blackman blabbering about Five needing a love story, when it would have taken him all of 5 minutes and a quick scroll through his tumblr tag to realize that all Five's fans ever wanted was for him to get a genuine hug and a thank you from his siblings for saving their sorry asses again and again. it's literally all we wanted.

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im sorry we are expected to believe that RAY walked out on his wife and kid???? you mean Raymond 'Best and Nicest Guy Around' Chestnut abandoned his child???? i think the fuck not He Would Not Fucking Do That Shit

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It really sucks how bad the writing was this season. Like I don’t even hate Lila or Five or anyone this season bc I can’t even see their actions as canon in my head. There actions were so out characters that I can’t even see them as the same people that they were in seasons 1-3. Like I’m not thinking “oh my god Five why would you do that!?!??” I’m thinking “why would they write this!!!”. I can respect the first thought but the second thought just upsets me. It was all so fundamentally wrong in terms of characterization, plot, and theme. Season 4, our FINAL season, was a bastardization of not only the characters but the show itself.

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there was something there with the cycle of abuse/cycle of apocalypses but then they went and said "no, actually, your trauma is your fault for existing and the only way to end the cycle is for you to have never existed in the first place" and then showed the world as a better place without them in it

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Ok Reginald just fucking shooting Ben and Jennifer is probably one of the funniest things to happen on this show. Just fucking shot their asses and somehow removed the other siblings memories for some stupid as hell plot reasons that made no sense. Like I thought the squid was what was living in Ben’s stomach and it tore him apart and ate her but nope. Reginald just busted out and got their asses. Was this what the characters were describing when talking about it before? They talk about how much they hate Reggie all the time but let’s not mention the time Reggie went Elmer Fudd? Viktor wrote about this in their book and the general public didn’t give a shit one about this? I’m SCREAMING

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Why did he HAVE to have a love story? That has never been a major issue for him. Sure five as a character could theoretically find someone down the line but it really doesn’t make sense for the actual show or it’s storyline. It went entirely against Five’s character and everything he has done in the show up to that point. Why create 3 seasons of a show where his WHOLE THING is how much he loves his family and then decide to end it with him betraying his brother and spending months purposely not going back to help? It makes no sense!!! It really seemed like this guy has just been waiting for Aiden to be of age to force a romance. Sucks

Oh yes, because let’s totally pair him up with his BROTHER’s WIFE?!

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Why give Five a love interest when you could’ve given Five a dog. The Mr. Pennycrumb arc would have gone so hard

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I hate to bitch but… I’m going to:

There was just? So much wrong this season and not even because I wasn’t a fan of the ending - in fact, I quite liked that they were 8 little marigolds together - but the rest of it!?

There’s at least three plot lines that added fuck all to the story - and I’m all for fluffing out the stories/characters, love me a filler episode - but not only did we not have time for a filler episode with 4 less episodes than usual those plot lines added nothing to the characters or the story or anything really.

Klaus getting kidnapped (again), no one noticing (again) - getting possessed & having sex, getting buried alive (again, if ykyk) apart from Alison going to save him - what did it add? - I love Klaus he’s literally my favourite character, I always want more Klaus but it kind of feels like they didn’t know what to do with him? - “let’s make him relapse and do some crazy stuff, for shits and giggles!”

Diego & Luther going to the CIA - this is the one I see the most sense in of course, but apart from making Diego realise that he shouldn’t take Lila and his kids for granted and announcing that the CIA guy was part of the whole Jean & Gene cult thing (and getting to see David Castañeda’s abs (despite supposedly having a Dad Bod now?)) it kind of went on too long? It felt like it was slightly misplaced? Idk

And of course, how could it go unmentioned - the Five/Lila romance? whAT THE FUCK!??? Like it’s creepy both ways bcos Ritu Arya is 15 years older than Aidan Gallagher - freshly legal - and because Five is nearly 70 at that point? And that’s without even mentioning the fact that, oh yeah - Lila’s married to his BROTHER? But if you took it out - what would change? Genuinely? That Lila will always choose her family? Choose Diego? Tbh she could easily come to that conclusion without any romance, she clearly longed to go back more than Five did (who btw, abandoned his family after spending his entire life trying to save them - WHAT?)

The only one making any progress was Viktor

And so many things left unexplained- why did Ray leave Alison? What happened to Dave? (Guessing he’s long dead now but we still don’t know if Klaus’ s2 plan had any effect & the only hint of him we got this season was the dog tags (more than last season at least)) Why is Reggie a fucking alien? How did he get to earth??

I just feel so unpleasantly underwhelmed for a show that has meant so much to me the past few years, for an ending that was mildly disappointing but not as much as the 4 episodes that came before it.