behumancravefreedom

[behumancravefreedom]

i will move far away

somewhere where even grocery shopping or a walk will be something I’m looking forward to

and when I get bored, I’ll move again

I’ll be moving around to keep myself happy

because this earth is big enough for me to see new things every day

so why waste it looking through the same window every day

after all maybe that’s all life is about

going

everywhere

seeing

everything

[behumancravefreedom]

i wouldn’t mind never looking at the stars again

or the sunsets

the moon

as long as i get to look at you

[behumancravefreedom]

i wish you healed before bringing me here

i could have been so much

if you didn’t give birth to your pain

[behumancravefreedom]

i want you to talk to me just because you want to talk to me

i want you to think about me so much that you have to force yourself not to text me

the way i do

[behumancravefreedom]

once someone said that “you can let go without forgiving” and that was the moment my soul became free

[behumancravefreedom]

sometimes i think that i deserve what happened to me

but then i bring free ice cream that i sell to the lonely old lady sitting on a bench

and as she later on tells me it made her day

i realize i’m good

i’m a good person and no one can take that from me.

[behumancravefreedom]

the biggest grief i’ve experienced

was when i realised

my little self will never be here again

my sad 16 year old self will never experience the love that I can give her now

no one loved her and she felt it more that she could handle

and i can never tell her she’s loved anymore

she’s dead, but lives inside me now

and i’ll love my today year old self

so i’ll never experience this grief again

[behumancravefreedom]

kiss my forehead

brush through my hair

caress my cheeks as i’m falling asleep

love me the way i need you to

love me the way i was never loved before

love me the way i begged my parents to love me

show me i’m lovable

show me i’m not just a big piece of flesh made from pain

[behumancravefreedom]

hold me tight as i’m drowning into my bed

[behumancravefreedom]

rip me open

tear me apart

see my guts, my rotten insides

and love me there

[behumancravefreedom]

will you ever love me the way i need you to?

step out of your way

look deep into me

notice my feelings, my moves

notice my words

every thing i do shows how i want to be loved

[behumancravefreedom]

sometimes i feel my eyes water as i think about my life and later that day i’m eating watermelon with my friends at night and think to myself “life is good. this is all i need”