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beomgyuslittleheart-blog · 6 years ago

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The Photographer’s Bridge

Taegyu au

Beomgyu is a world famous photographer known for his vintage style. He purchases an old camera from a thrift shop. It takes beautiful pictures, but a mysterious figure appears in each one. The thought consumes him, who is the man in the photographs? What will he do to find out?

Developing photo after photo, they were all the same. A young man with dark hair and big eyes. Beomgyu didn’t know where to even begin looking for the stranger, so he returned to the shop where he bought the camera, in search of answers.

A dead end. The camera had been donated anonymously, no trace of the previous owner. Dejected Beomgyu went to his favorite place beneath the bridge by the river. He raised the camera, hesitating before snapping a photo. Apprehensive, he ran home and straight into his dark room.

There he was. Like magic, the man appeared beneath the bridge where Beomgyu had been alone. What if…what if these were places the man has been before? What if he was trying to communicate somehow through the camera? Beomgyu’s face dropped in despair. What if the man was dead?

Ridiculous, impossible, astronomically unlikely. He tried to convince himself that there must be something wrong with his chemicals. Still, Beomgyu couldn’t shake the thought that the man was asking him for help. Weirdest of all, he wanted to help him. He just didn’t know how.

Unsure of what he should do Beomgyu found himself returning to the bridge every day as if drawn there. He hoped to capture the mysterious man again. He took shot after shot, almost running out of film until finally he found him. The man in the photo stared back at him expectantly.

With a shudder, Beomgyu flipped to the next developed photo. In it, the man had shifted and was now staring up at the bridge with a restless expression. Beomgyu felt the rigid weight of the man’s gaze through the celluloid. Was there something up there he wanted Beomgyu to find?

Beomgyu couldnt help his shaking hands as he developed the final photo. The mans face was pleading & desperate. He was begging for help, from him. The photographer bit his lip, not daring to lift the photo out of the tray. He turned off the dark room light & ran out into the city.

Though he had been to the underpass several times, it took him fifteen minutes to find the place on the bridge the man had been gazing at. He searched the ground but found only dirt & gravel pressed into crevices in the asphalt. He leaned against the concrete railing with a sigh.

He drew slow circles in the gravel with his feet, staring blankly down at the river below. Suddenly his shoe caught on something. Bending down, he picked up a worn and battered plastic ID card. He gasped, immediately recognizing the man in the photo.

“Kang Taehyun,” he whispered to himself. The card was clearly old and expired by several years. He flipped the ID over and found a series of handwritten letters and numbers scrawled on the back. A bus route? At that moment, a loud squeal broke Beomgyu’s train of thought.

He looked up to see a bus had arrived, the doors opening with a creak to let him on. It felt like fate, so Beomgyu allowed his feet to carry him up the stairs. He paid the fee and sat in the seat directly behind the driver. Then he turned and raised his camera.

The bus had taken him out of the city, and it took over an hour to get back to where he had started. Before disembarking, he showed the ID to the driver, just in case. The man shook his head, but told Beomgyu he might have more luck with the records at the issuing office.

He sat patiently, watching the woman in front of him clacking at her keyboard. She paused, glancing between the ID and her screen before shaking her head. “It looks like his pass was never renewed. I’m sorry, we don’t have any information about him.” She offered him a sad smile.

Another dead end. Directionless, Beomgyu took to wandering. He rode the bus every day, hoping for some grand revelation, but nothing developed. One night, out of desperation, he stuck his head out the bus window and screamed. At his lowest moment, Taehyun appeared to him again.

Beomgyu woke up early to catch the morning bus with renewed hope that a change in the time of day might bring another sign, another message. In the dappled morning light, he presses the shutter until there is no more film left, praying that Taehyun is in even just one photograph.

He smiled to himself. Taehyun had appeared after all. But his hope shattered the instant he slipped the last photo into the tray. Was he hurt? A knot grew in his throat. Was he…dead? A tear slid silently into developing solution, which rippled over the image of the man’s body.

Beomgyu frantically searched for any information he could about the bridge and Kang Taehyun. His heart froze, unprepared and taken aback by what he found. There had been an accident. His phone clattered to the ground as he covered his face, unable to stop himself from weeping.

Slumping into a chair in his dark room, Beomgyu felt the ID card in his pocket. With trembling hands he slid it out, unable to make out the now-familiar face through his tear soaked eyes. Somehow, despite all the tragedy he’d discovered, the man’s photos brought him comfort.

Beomgyu felt as if he knew him. If they’d met, he was certain they would have been very close. Perhaps even best friends. Kang Taehyun was by all accounts a stranger to him, yet his house and his heart were filled with his photographs. He gripped the ID tightly in his hand.

There wasn’t much he could do, but he could at least do this. Standing up, Beomgyu brushed the dirt off of his hands and double checked his work. Not knowing what else to do to ease the man’s soul, he buried Taehyun’s ID card beneath the Han River bridge.

Above the card, Beomgyu planted a small light pink carnation. He wanted Taehyun’s memory to grow and bring light into the world the way it had for him. The gesture did not feel like nearly enough, but he was hopeful that it would bring rest to the man’s spirit.

Beomgyu rode the bus back to his apartment. He was used to the bumps now after spending so much time here. He liked to imagine Taehyun by his side, the two of them chatting and laughing together on their way to school. He smiled at the thought and the empty seat beside him

He was surprised to see a blank envelope on his doorstep. Inside was a single battered Polaroid. He began to cry as he gazed at the photo of Taehyun holding a carnation just like the one he had planted. He smiled & in a quiet, assured voice Beomgyu whispered “Rest easy, Taehyun.”

#taegyu #beomgyu #choi beomgyu #taehyun #kang taehyun #txt #tomorrow x together #tomorrow by together #taegyu au #mouseferatu #taegyumin #my fanfiction

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beomgyuslittleheart-blog · 6 years ago

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Masuri Suri

Stage magician Taegyu au

Chapter 7: Wouldn't You Regret It?

Taehyun held his phone in his shaking hands, staring at the message Beomgyu had sent him. The place that makes me happiest?...he thought, losing himself for a moment. He knew immediately which place it was, felt the dappled sunlight falling on his face and the worn bench beneath his palms. The phone in his hand vibrated again, drawing Taehyun back to reality. It was a message from Kai asking him to meet up.

“Meet me at the cafe on 5th street! I have a surprise for you!!”

Oh this can’t be good.

Kai’s surprises were always very...unpredictable. One time he had ‘surprised’ Taehyun by dragging a kiddie pool into his living room and filling it with Jello powder. Kai had been devastated when Taehyun explained that it would never turn into Jello because it would have to be refrigerated. The younger simply said he should have made the Jello in batches and then put it in the pool. Taehyun could only shake his head. His house had smelled like strawberry kiwi for weeks.

After quickly stopping by his house, Jello free thank goodness he thought, he walked down the street to The Star’s Dream cafe. Kai didn’t live too far away, but it was far enough to be an uncomfortably long walk. The cafe was right in the center between them and they had been using it as their meeting place for years. The bell chimed as he walked in, a barista welcomed him without looking up from the espresso machine. He stepped up to the counter and she turned to him, “Ah, Taehyun! Welcome back. Same as always?”

He nodded quickly and pulled out his wallet , “Yes, one caramel latte please.” He handed a few bills to the barista absentmindedly and moved to the side to wait. His thoughts returned to the small paper coffee cup in the bookstore, and the boy who had brought it to him. He couldn’t shake the image of Beomgyu kneeling, looking at him with such a frightened expression. It had been a long time since he had experienced a panic attack, and he hated that the other saw him like that. His nails bit into his palm as he clenched his fist.

“Taehyun!” He shook his head and looked around to find the barista waving at him and pointing at his drink on the counter. He thanked her and picked it up, glancing around for a place to sit. He chose a small table by the window, hoping the city lights would keep him distracted. Every time he had even a moment to think, there he was again in the bookshop. A light pink flower. A playing card. A neon heart. A smile. His smile. Taehyun pulled his phone out of his pocket. He hadn’t responded to Beomgyu yet. He couldn’t think of what to say, even though he knew exactly where to take him. It wasn’t the words that held him up but the fact that he was messaging him at all. Ever since Beomgyu came into Taehyun’s life, he’d become a wreck. He didn’t like the feeling of not being in control of himself. He stared out the window attempting to sort out his feelings but it ended up just making him more confused. After a few minutes he heard the door chime again. Turning to look, he saw Kai walk into the cafe. A smile spread across his lips only to dim a moment later when he saw a tall, dark haired man come in after him. Kai was bouncing excitedly, eyes darting wildly around the cafe. The man gave the younger an endearing smile even though he couldn’t see it. That must be-

“Soobin! Look, I found him!!” Kai grabbed the boy’s hand and sprinted across the cafe towards Taehyun. He dragged him in front and pushed him forward, “Taehyun, this is Soobin!!”

Soobin smiled at him and gave him a shy wave, “It’s nice to meet you! Kai talks about you quite a bit.”

Taehyun’s mouth hung open, taken aback. “H-hello,” he stuttered and held out his hand. Soobin shook it heartily.

Kai slid into the seat beside Taehyun and gestured for Soobin to sit too. Instead, Soobin offered to order their drinks while the two caught up and he walked off towards the counter. Kai gazed after him dreamily before whipping around to face Taehyun. “Isn’t he just the cutest??” He squealed, fluttering with excitement.

“He seems very sweet,” Taehyun said, trying to force some enthusiasm into his voice.

“He is! Oh my gosh, Tae, we were having a date today and I thought what better than to meet my best friend!” He reached out and grabbed Taehyun’s hands, cupping them in his own. “I wanted you to meet him, so you can finally believe me that he’s real.”

Taehyun laughed, “I always believed you. I just thought you might’ve exaggerated a bit.” He looked at Soobin, “though you definitely weren’t exaggerating about his height. He’s so tall!”

Kai nodded several times, “Mmhmm! I even have to stand on tippy toes to give him kisses!” he beamed.

“Kisses, huh?” Taehyun smiled, a weird feeling building in his stomach. “Already?”

Kai held his chest and scoffed. “What do you mean already? It’s never too early for kisses! Everyone deserves those.” He went back to watching Soobin, who was smiling at his phone while waiting for their drinks. “I think I love him, Tae.”

Taehyun choked on his drink. “You love him? Isn’t this like your first date?”

“Second,” Kai said simply, unfazed by the implications of Taehyun’s comment.

Soobin walked back to their table and placed Kai’s hot chocolate in front of him while he settled in with his frozen cappuccino. He pulled out his phone and placed it on the table for Kai and Taehyun to see. “My neighbor gave me a tip about a rabbit litter in our neighborhood last week. She was able to get some photos of the babies today. Aren’t they cute?” His face lit up with a wide smile.

Kai snatched up the phone and melted, holding it to his chest. “They’re the second cutest ever.”

“Second?” Soobin asked innocently.

Kai booped his nose and hummed. “Mmhmm! You’re the first.”

Taehyun shifted in his seat uncomfortably, feeling out of place. He stared at the table, unsure of what to say. Kai sensed his unease and looked at him, feeling a bit guilty. “Oh! Taehyun!! How did it go? You met up with him, didn’t you?” He turned to Soobin, “He had a date with another magician today, you know The Dazzling Beomgyu?”

“Oh, I’ve heard of him! Never been to one of his shows, though. A date, huh?” He asked, intrigued. He raises his eyebrows, just like Kai.

Taehyun gritted his teeth. “It wasn’t a date.” His voice had come out harsher than he’d intended. He sighed and softened his tone, “It went alright. It was...more than a little awkward, honestly.”

Kai slipped his hand into Soobin’s and held it across the table. “First dates always are, aren’t they?”

“I told you, it wasn’t a date. Anyway, I wouldn’t know,” Taehyun said, dejected. “I don’t really go on dates.” He knew if he kept talking about Beomgyu he’d get upset. He didn’t want Soobin’s first impression to be him crying over a boy, so he tried to act casual and changed the subject. “Anyway, you guys seem happy. Kai said you had a date today, actually. What did you do?”

Soobin smiled, “I took him to a petting zoo. I know he likes the more exotic animals, but-”

“Uh, excuse you, alpacas are exotic and I got to pet one today! Tae, it was so cool! You should definitely go there sometime, they’re so cute. They have pigs and little ducks and even a horse!” Kai’s voice raised with excitement, and Soobin hushed him gently. He continued in a loud whisper, “there was even a peacock, Hyunnie. A peacock!! Though it was kinda mean to be honest.”

“I think most are,” Taehyun shrugged.

“It’s not that they’re mean, so to speak,” Soobin explained, “it’s that they’re a particularly territorial species. Even though we aren't peacocks they still perceive us as a threat and thus try to establish a hierarchy.” Kai’s expression softened considerably, and he placed his chin in his hands as he listened to Soobin. “I’ve worked with them before, and they have a bit of an ego. You gotta flatter them, make them feel like they’re at the top, and then you can treat them.”

Taehyun sipped his latte. “You know a lot about them.”

“I try to learn as much as possible about a species’s psychology before stepping in to address their health concerns. I’m sure Hyuka already told you, but I mostly deal with exotics and farm animals than I do your typical cat and dog.”

Hyuka. Pet names already...

“You’re the dreamiest,” Kai cooed. Taehyun couldn’t tell if he was aware that he’d said that out loud, then realized Kai wouldn’t care either way. He was always saying what he thought no matter what it was. Soobin blushed deeply, swirling his drink.

Taehyun grew more frustrated as time went on. He was happy for Kai, he really was. The boy deserved to be with someone who would treat him right, and it was obvious Soobin would. Still, he couldn’t shake the hollow pit that was growing in his stomach as he watched the couple play with each other’s hands and exchange sweet glances. Am I jealous? he thought, staring out the window.

Kai noticed the shift in Taehyun’s mood and patted Soobin’s hand before pulling his own away. “Taehyun?”

His eyes trailed a car on the highway in the distance, “Mmm?”

“I know you’re not okay. Do you want to talk about it?” he said gently. Kai had a preternatural ability to read Taehyun’s emotions no matter how good of a mask he wore.

“I’m fine. I’ll be fine. I’m just…” He sighed and watched the city lights. “I wish I could have something like what you guys have. I’m trying to come to terms with the fact that it’s ever going to happen.”

Kai shot him a confused look. “I was positive Beomgyu liked you though?”

“He does,” Taehyun said flatly.

“Then what’s the problem?” Kai asked, shaking his head.

Taehyun looked at him and then at the floor. “I am.”

Kai grabbed his hand, scooting over until their knees were touching. “Kang Taehyun. I know you won’t believe me but, no look at me-” he grabbed Taehyun’s chin and tilted it up until they were eye to eye. “Taehyun, you are worthy of love. I know you feel like you don’t deserve it, but as your best friend I think I am beyond qualified to say that you deserve to be loved. If Beomgyu likes you, do you like him?”

Do I? His mind fluttered, unable to pin down a single thought. “I- I don’t know. I don’t really remember what liking someone feels like.”

Kai tapped his chin. “Hmm...Does he make you feel kinda sick, like you might faint, but in a good way?”

“I mean, if you can call having a panic attack being sick,” Taehyun said bitterly, unable to look at Kai any longer.

“A panic attack??” Kai asked, clearly alarmed. “Taehyunnie, what the hell happened?”

Taehyun closed his eyes in a futile attempt to escape the conversation. “He asked me out.”

Kai’s mouth dropped open. “And??”

Taehyun shook his head, sadness creeping into his voice. “And I had a panic attack. And then I turned him down.”

Kai leapt out of his seat and wrapped his arms around Taehyun’s neck, almost knocking him off his chair. He planted a big kiss on Taehyun’s cheek, who immediately wiped it off with disgust, which made Kai laugh. “Taehyun?” he said sweetly.

“Ugh, what Kai? Why are you clinging onto me? Soobin is over there.” He pointed to the man across from him, who was trying desperately to hide his smile behind a neutral expression.

Kai made no effort to move. “Are you afraid?”

Taehyun didn’t respond, and instead stared at the floor with a pained expression.

“It’s okay to be afraid. It’s scary putting yourself out there and being vulnerable. You just have to trust sometimes, Hyunnie.”

“Trust someone I don’t know?” he scoffed. “That seems like the perfect way to get hurt.”

Kai nodded. “You might get hurt, yeah, that’s a risk. But you might not. You might discover something truly special that will last a lifetime. There’s no way of knowing unless you try.”

Taehyun shook his head. “No, Kai. We’re just friends. I ensured that we’re just friends. And that- that’s enough. We, I can’t be anything more than that.”

Soobin coughed lightly and both boys turned to look at him. He laced his hands together on top of the table. “I know that I don’t know you Taehyun, and I don’t presume to. From what I can tell from today, though, you seem like you have very conflicted feelings about this man. Don’t you think that your feelings are worth exploring, even if you don’t act on them?”

Taehyun said nothing, but his expression eased a bit. Kai flashed Soobin a big grin, encouraging him to keep going.

“It’s important to be honest with ourselves,” he continued. “By reflecting on our feelings, we’re able to understand ourselves better, make ourselves happier. I agree with Kai, Taehyun, you deserve to be happy. There’s a chance this Beomgyu can make you happy. It’s up to you whether you take that chance, but if you don’t, someone else will. Wouldn’t you regret it?”

Taehyun laid his arms on the table, resting his head on them as Kai rubbed small circles on his back. After calming his ragged breathing, in a muffled, barely audible whisper, Taehyun said, “I don’t want to regret anything anymore.”

Kai smiled and patted him, “Good choice. We’ll be here to support you no matter what happens, Hyunnie.”

Taehyun grabbed Kai’s free hand and squeezed it. He wiped at the tears that were threatening to spill from his eyes. “Having feelings sucks,” he said with a shallow chuckle. The other boys laughed brightly and agreed.

+×+

When Beomgyu walked in the door and found Yeonjun sprawled on the couch watching reality TV shows, he couldn’t help but laugh. “Seems like you’ve had a long day, huh?” he said sarcastically as he flung his bag on the ground and plopped onto the couch beside the older boy.

“Excruciating,” Yeonjun said without looking away from the screen. “I even had to make my own food.”

Beomgyu eyed the empty containers of microwaveable ramen that littered the coffee table. “That’s rough buddy,” Beomgyu snickered.

Yeonjun threw a pillow at him and Beomgyu dramatically fell over, pretending to be dead. “It is way too early for you to be making Last Airbender references, you know I’m still emotional about it.” He said, clutching his heart.

The blonde giggled. “Too early? It’s almost 4 in the afternoon.”

“Exactly my point,” Yeonjun replied. He glanced over at Beomgyu and did a quick double take. “Hey, are you okay man?”

“Uh yeah, what do you mean?” Beomgyu asked, confusion etched on his face.

Yeonjun looked at him intently before saying, “You seem upset.”

Beomgyu held his hands up, reassuring him. “I’m fine hyung, seriously.”

“Then why are you crying?”

He gingerly touched his cheek and felt tears gently rolling down. He looked at his fingertips in disbelief before giving Yeonjun a worried look. The older boy sat up and slid over to him, wiping the tears away with his sleeve. “Okay now you definitely have to spill. What’s going on?” he said softly. With a steady grip on his shoulder, Yeonjun held the blonde’s gaze until he was capable of speaking.

Beomgyu shook his head. “I- I didn’t even realize I was crying.”

Yeonjun sighed. “That’s how I know something’s really getting to you, when even you are in denial about it.” He rubbed his hand on Beomgyu’s back softly. “Now come on, tell Junie what’s gotten into you.”

The boy stared at his hands bewildered. “I mean, I saw Taehyun again today and that was…”

Yeonjun waved his hand, “Wait, who’s Taehyun?”

Beomgyu took a deep breath. The love of my- “He’s the magician I told you about. The one who I scared off the other day.”

“Oh,” Yeonjun’s eyes widened. “Oh! Did you fuck up again?” Yeonjun realized too late that probably wasn’t the best way to phrase the question.

“I don’t..think so? I don’t know honestly. I asked him out.” His heartbeat flickered when he remembered Taehyun’s reaction.

“And…?” Yeonjun tried to read Beomgyu’s expression, but it was impossible.

“And he kind of...freaked out...Went all pale and spacey. Which freaked me out. I thought he was really sick and I was terrified for him. But after a little while he said he was okay. And then he rejected me.” He looked up at Yeonjun, more tears spilling from his eyes involuntarily. Neither of them bothered to wipe them away.

Yeonjun gave him a side hug and the boy collapsed into his arms. “Aw, baby Beom, it’s okay. Shhh,” he hummed a faint, soothing melody. “You really like this guy, huh?” He felt Beomgyu nod his head against his chest, small sobs wracking his body. Yeonjun patted his hair, running his fingers over the blonde locks gently. He was doing his best to try and calm the boy down, but it didn’t seem to be working.

“He- he asked if we could be friends,” Beomgyu said in a choked voice. “Just friends. Junie, I can’t do just friends, I can’t. It’s too stressful,” his voice grew loud and frantic. “I’ve never been able to be ‘just friends’ with someone I liked. I’ve only ever driven them off or ruined things or ghosted them to save myself the pain. No matter how hard I try, my feelings always ruin ‘just friends’. I can’t go through that again.” He wrapped his arms around Yeonjun's waist, hugging him tight. “I like him so much, Junie. I don’t even know him, but I can just tell that he’s perfect and smart and handsome and I feel so fucking stupid that I’ve already fucked up whatever chance I had with him before he could even give me one. I can’t stand the idea of hurting him, it makes me sick to even think about. But if we try to be just friends, I will hurt him eventually. It’s inevitable.”

Yeonjun let Beomgyu keep talking until he ran out of words, soon replaced with shallow breathing. He waited a moment longer, then asked in a whisper, “How can you be so sure? That you’ll hurt him?”

After taking a few deep breaths, Beomgyu sat up and wiped his nose. “Because I know me. You know me too, how can you not see it? Best case scenario is we try to be friends, I end up falling for him even more until eventually I can’t contain the way I feel and make things weird. I don’t want things to be weird…I don’t want him to leave, and I don’t want to be the reason he’s upset.”

Yeonjun placed his hands on Beomgyu’s shoulders, steadying him. “What if he just needs some time? I mean, you came on strong, then backed off, then you immediately asked him out. That’s a roller coaster of social interaction with someone he just met. I can understand how that might mess with his emotions a bit. But there’s no way of knowing what you’ll be at the end of ‘just friends’. Maybe it’ll fizzle out, or maybe it’ll transition into something more. If you like this guy as much as you say, are you really willing to give up on that chance so easily? Wouldn’t you regret it?”

Beomgyu bit his lip. “I just don’t want him to hate me…”

“So what if he hates you?” Yeonjun shrugged. “Then you move on. It sucks, I know, but you know what would suck more? Spending the next six months wondering what would’ve happened if you had just given it a shot.”

The blonde boy twisted his hands together. He couldn’t deny that he wanted to see Taehyun again, preferably as soon as possible. Or that he was looking forward to seeing wherever it was that Taehyun would take him. He didn’t know where they were going, but as long as Taehyun was with him, Beomgyu would be happy. He wanted to be happy, desperately. They hadn’t spent much time together, but already Taehyun had made Beomgyu feel open and safe, like he had finally been noticed for who he was, not who he appeared to be. Not his persona, but himself. Just Beomgyu. He could tell that the other was gentle and kind, even if things hadn’t started out that way. He wanted to know so much more about the brunette than just the color yellow and caramel lattes. More than playing cards and paper tricks. He wanted to know everything.

Yeonjun gave him a shake. “Hello? Earth to Beomgyu? Come in, Beomgyu?”

He allowed himself a small smile, remembering his impromptu appointment as the ambassador of Earth. Slowly, he sat up straight and nodded his head. “I’ll be seeing him again soon so I can return his book. I’ll decide what to do after that. If it goes well, I will give ‘just friends’ a shot. If not,” he paused hesitantly before breathing out a resigned sigh, “If not, I’ll disappear.”

“Well, you’re not an escape artist for nothing,” Yeonjun chuckled. “I’m glad you’re not gonna give up. The Beomgyu I know never gives up.”

He closed his eyes, exhausted. “We’ll see.”

#taegyu #beomgyu #choi beomgyu #taehyun #kang taehyun #txt #tomorrow by together #tomorrow x together #taegyu au #my fanfiction #mouseferatu

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