biblicallyangry - Tumblr blog

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mama who bore me

part 1

gillian flynn “sharp objects” // “hereditary” (2018) // “flowers in the attic” (2014) // mythological beauty “big thief” // alex michaelides // @western-fence-lizard // https://www.bethanywebster.com/blog/mother-wound-healing/ // salma deera “letters from medea” // “the witch” (2015) // @filmnoirsbian // milan kundera

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joan tierney, mommy issues: unlearning inherited pain

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Filial cannibalism is perfectly natural, dear. Animals do it all the time. Now eat your dinner.

The binding of isaac // “to the detriment of daughters” kelsey lansgaard // sharp objects // “The Last Days of Judas Iscariot” stephen adly guirgis // hereditary // the vvitch // jennifer’s body // stoker // @filmnoirsbian // mad men

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Studies suggest How may I help you officer? is the single most disarming thing to say and not What’s the problem? Studies suggest it’s best the help reply My pleasure and not No problem. Studies suggest it’s best not to mention problem in front of power even to say there is none. Gloria Steinem says women lose power as they age and yet the loudest voice in my head is my mother. Studies show the mother we have in mind isn’t the mother that exists. Mine says: What the fuck are you crying for? Studies show the baby monkey will pick the fake monkey with fake fur over the furless wire monkey with milk, without contest. Studies show to negate something is to think it anyway. I’m not sad. I’m not sad. Studies recommend regular expressions of gratitude and internal check-ins. Enough, the wire mother says. History is a kind of study. History says we forgave the executioner. Before we mopped the blood we asked: Lord Judge, have I executed well? Studies suggest yes. What the fuck are you crying for, officer? the wire mother teaches me to say, while studies suggest Solmaz, have you thanked your executioner today?

— Solmaz Sharif, “Social Skills Training,” published in Buzzfeed

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at the end of the day you come back home, but your house is dead

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Seam: ‘Interviewer’s Note IV’ by Tarfia Faizullah

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I AM CARRIE / CRUELTY / MOTHER OF MY MOTHER

Keep reading

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what a mother does for you out of obligation vs what a mother does for you because she wants to. the taste of a cup of coffee made from obligation vs. the taste of a cup of coffee made. did you raise me because you wanted to or did you raise me because you had to, because i was in your home and you thought, i have to put food in every mouth under this roof. did you look at me with love or did you look at me. did you ever look at me? did you ever see me? did you want to? do you want to still? if i asked you to love me would you laugh? would you ask me why? would you tell me to not ask such stupid questions? would you go to bed and wonder to yourself, why does she think i don't love her? i've done everything for her i've bathed her i've clothed her i've fed her i kept a roof over her head. isn't that love? do you even know? do you know what love looks like? did your mother love you? did she make you coffee? can you tell me what it tasted like?

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FIRE WALK WITH ME

a collage/digital work to celebrate a year of twin peaks in my life

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After a while of abusing you, the idea that you're a human being becomes a threat to the abusers. It reminds them they did reprehensible and unforgivable crimes against another human being, and then instead of confronting remorse for it, they try to erase your humanity instead. They focus on convincing you that you somehow, are less than other humans, that you deserve this, that you're not good for anything else but this, that you asked for it, wanted it, that you have no human rights, no point of view, no perspective. That you have to take on their perspective of you, their view of how you should be treated. That their horrifying and cruel treatment of you is right and above criticism.

That's how far they go just to escape any consequences of abusing you, and once you believe them, once you feel that you don't deserve any better, they relax in thinking that the consequences will never come. That they can gaslight and brainwash you forever. And then they'll go back to abusing you. The entire scheme exists to enable them to abuse you and never suffer any consequences.

Just because someone manages to convince you that you're not human, doesn't make it true. Their lies cannot erase anyone's humanity. Victims realize what's been done to them when it's gotten too far, and they'll recognize they're dealing with an enemy who is trying to erase their humanity.

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The Glass Essay, Anne Carson | Molly Brodak, Molly Brodak

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anyone else relate

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Cant stop thinking about this comment under a video about stardew valley rabbits foot drops

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Nicole W. Lee, from "Even the Dust"

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Being ordered around by abusive parents is infuriating because 

a) I absolutely despise being obedient to a person who humiliated, insulted, hurt and terrorized me, I want to retaliate to show them they can’t just do whatever they want to me and still count on me being obedient, I hate being helpless and in someone’s power, also, I’m hurt to know they don’t care about me or love me and all they want from me is obedience,  I’m a human being and they shouldn’t get away with this,

b) if i don’t do it they’ll kill me

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abusive parents will give you the bare minimum and then convince you it’s a lot more than you deserve