binaryoutliar

[binaryoutliar]

Planning my Super Sweet Suicide for my 25th birthday.

Finally gonna be successful at something.

[binaryoutliar]

Sometimes I like to assert myself as a Local to the College Students by saying “Y’all”.

[binaryoutliar]

The kestrel shuffle! Gotta keep them eggs warm!

Source: Nest Box Live

[binaryoutliar]

i think i’m funny

[binaryoutliar]

I love tumblr. I love that tumblr is the best social media site of 2021.

Every other site has spent the last decade perfecting the art of targeted ads. I am a wallet of flesh and blood which must be stripped bare and profiled and picked apart for the maximally efficient way to squeeze profit from my presence. Every other site will fold and morph itself to a shape of my liking - like a fairy tale trickster stealing memories and taking their mold - to lull me into compliance and loosen my coin purse.

Facebook sees me searching fitness equipment and injects my timeline with athletic wear ads. Reddit profiles the subreddits I follow and eagerly promotes a new coding bootcamp or cloud service at every turn. Google overhears me lamenting over my moving to-do list on voice call and fills in my “how much to tip movers” query before I’ve gotten the third word typed out.

Tumblr never even tried.

They could have. The information is there. The basic infrastructure, presumably, exists. Tumblr can recommend me tags based on tags I follow, blogs based on blogs I follow, even posts that for one reason or another may strike my fancy. Tumblr could be - SHOULD be - funneling this framework into advertising, as the only means that free-to-use social media platforms can turn a profit in our capitalistic hellscape.

They just don’t.

Today I saw an ad for treating Hyperhidrosis - a condition, I think, in which a person sweats too much - and I saw it twice, four posts apart, and it is so incredibly benignly impersonally ineptly untargeted toward me compared to all other pinpoint-aimed advertising that I’m endeared to it. Tumblr knows NOTHING about me. 8 years, 51,000 likes, and tumblr has not learned a THING about me.

Advertisements for a mattress? Shitty mobile game ads that don’t make even the slightest pretense at being anything other than a candy crush rip-off? Choose-your-own adventure games either about Royal Espionage or Choosing The Wrong Dress For Your Date with ZERO in-between.

And then this. This here. The culmination, the crown-jewel of tumblr’s nihilistic non-compliance with the state of social media advertising. Any pretense of capitalistic exchange is abandoned at the gas station by the side of the road. This is not a company. This is not a product. This is not anything that fulfills the contract of consumer and seller. 

THIS. THIS IS WHAT TUMBLR HAS TO OFFER INSTEAD.

“Pour vinegar on your bread, fuck you.”

“Put it in the garbage, fuck you.”

“Your wife says you’re a fucking dumbass, fuck you.”

That’s it. That’s the advertisement. You vinegar-breadless cuck. You virgin extraordinaire bereft of bread and garbage can. I am fucking your wife right now in our vinegar-soaked motel bed. She puffs a cigarette which I pulled from the trashcan and we both laugh heartily at her recounts of your immasculine ineptitude. I don’t want your money. I don’t want anything from you. Fuck you. 

Amazing. Amazing. What a state of things to ring in 2021. What a great platform we all collectively choose to be on.

[binaryoutliar]

people need to shit on rural rich people more. rural rich people are all like “i’m hardy countryfolk because i don’t live in a city i’m so rugged my family owns a ranch that i never worked on but i visit i’m very off he earth which is why my big ass pickup is totally spotless i’m one the toughskinned people which is why i have a stable of horses like a cowboy except the horses are just pets and for competitions and i don’t realize owning horses just for those purposes is like one of the oldest symbols of ostentatious wealth”

[binaryoutliar]

[binaryoutliar]

The struggles of the LGBT+ community are clearly far from over, but sometimes I just have to reflect on how 15 years ago, my freshly-out teenage self could never imagine a future where her adult self rolls her eyes at local bank branches done up in rainbows for Pride Month.

[binaryoutliar]

am i allowed to say stuff on here?

[binaryoutliar]

[binaryoutliar]

‘I’M JUST A KID AND LIFE IS A NIGHTMARE’ i scream at the age of 23 as i’m forced to make adult phonecalls

[binaryoutliar]

Anyone else has like... The inability to form habits?

Like normal people, they repeat something daily for a couple weeks and it sticks. They might miss a day here or there, but the overall habit is formed.

Me? I can push myself to do the same task daily for 8 months, forget one day, and it's gone. I realize 3 weeks later that i have not done it a single time since.

[binaryoutliar]

Need to stop missing people who don’t miss me and never made me feel wanted in the first place

[binaryoutliar]

man i hate the allure of a good grilled cheese. you make one and eat it and its so good and perfect, maybe a little bland but in a good way and you instantly think “man that was a really good grilled cheese, im not entirely full yet, maybe i’ll have another…” dont do it. don’t even think about it. it’s the opposite of oreos. you make your second grilled cheese and 3 bites into it you’re so overwhelmed by the monotony. “this isnt nearly as good as the last one” despite being practically identical. The grilled cheese is a sacred food, it must be eaten hot, and quick. A second one only allows you to stew in the memories of the past (your previous cheese) and your nostalgia clouds your mind, creating an epic fail bite in your newest creation of dairy and grain. Show some restraint. 

[binaryoutliar]

Man I hate people who are like, super verbal about hating cats. NOBODY cares that you don’t like cats. Also I think you’re a bitch ass

[binaryoutliar]