biphobia-archive

[biphobia-archive]

Bi women can’t talk about being in relationships with men because that’s seen as forcing heterosexuality upon gay and lesbian people. Bi women who previously identified as something other than bi can’t talk about the process of realizing they were bi because that’s seen as forcing heterosexuality upon lesbians. Bi women can only talk about being in relationships with women if they add 15 caveats about how they hate other bi women now and have discarded their bisexuality. Bi women in relationships with bi men or with lesbians have to swear up and down that they aren’t fetishizing their partners. 

Bi women can’t talk about being happy (either single or in a relationship) because then people will take that as us having no problems in the world. Bi people can’t talk about mundane issues such as media representation or language about bisexuals because that’s too trivial. Bi women can’t talk about their sex lives or wanting to be polyamorous because that’s seen as too dirty and too gross and too predatory. Bi women can’t produce or consume “sappy wuhluhwuh content” because that’s seen as defanging and disrespecting lesbian identity and yet they can’t talk about bisexual social alienation/trauma/invisibility/loneliness because “invisibility is a privilege” and because “those things are just stolen terms from gay and lesbian people”. 

Bi women can’t talk about being unicorn hunted on dating apps because apparently they don’t face that issue and instead perpetuate it and force lesbians to have threesomes with their male partners (apparently). Bi women can’t talk about intracommunity biphobia without being told that we aren’t radical for dating men and that LGBT spaces are safe gay spaces that we’d be invading. 

Bi women can’t call themselves gay even when they’re in gay relationships. Bi women can’t call themselves tops or bottoms even when they’re having regular gay sex. Bi women can’t call themselves queer because that’s a slur but oh wait, it’s okay when other people weaponize that word against us. Bi women can’t call themselves masc or femme because they’d be stealing those terms from lesbians but oh wait they can’t call themselves tomcats, does, or stags because those terms are cringeworthy imitations of butch/femme. Bi women can’t talk about gender expression without being told they’re appropriating “real” gay culture. Bi women can’t talk about femininity without being told they perform it for men and bi women can’t talk about masculinity without being told that being bi makes it impossible for them to be masculine. 

Bi women can’t talk about how unique relationships between bi women and bi men or bi women and bi women or bi men and bi men are. Bi women can’t call their relationships “bisexual” relationships because that’s somehow “anti-materialism”. Bi women can’t talk about loving their male partners because that’s anti-feminist but they can’t talk about hating men as a class or their trauma with respect to men without being told that it means they must actually be “lesbians suffering from comphet”. 

Bi women can’t talk about solidarity with LGBT people without being seen as selfish, nor can they talk about just bi women without being seen as selfish. 

Bi women can’t talk about the material, systemic, and sexual violence we face because apparently it isn’t real, no matter how much empirically validated proof we offer, and if we do talk about it, we’re stealing lesbian specific experiences or erasing lesbian specific experiences or trying to claim gay and lesbian specific experiences. 

Bi women can’t talk about our place in overall LGBT history (because we were apparently invented in 1998) and we can’t talk about bisexual history (because that’s *spins wheel* taking the focus off the REAL radicals in the community). 

Bi women have to be politically perfect all the time and have to allow people to scrutinize their personal lives and interpersonal relationships and sexual histories/traumas but it’s okay for people to not be in solidarity with us or to even offer us an ounce of empathy (and if we ask for it we’re whiny, selfish, and crying about non-issues). Bi women have to hate themselves and each other and hold each other responsible for all the world’s problems 24/7 but can never hold people responsible for biphobia. 

Bi women can’t even talk about any of these things on their own blogs, in their own spaces, on their own time, with other bi women, because that’s just too much.

There really is no winning. 

[biphobia-archive]

Prejudice at Pride. A black bis‌e‌xual woman's experience in pride events

Comic description:

Prejudice at Pride

Panel 1

[Image] A black woman wearing a headwrap, looking at the reader. She looks concerned. The background is horizontal block colours – a rainbow pattern.

[Caption] I get nervous before any LGBT event. Especially Pride.

Panel 2

[Image] Two men, one white, and one black. Both look angry, and both are holding rainbow flags.

[Caption] There’s so much hate towards bisexuals at these events. I can’t have children. These words hurt. A lot.

White man: Breeders!

Black man: Get out of here, switcheroos.

Panel 3

[Image] The woman facing away from the reader, at the backs of the two men, still holding their rainbow flags. The woman is also holding a rainbow flag, but hers is lowered.

[Caption] Pride is supposed to be a celebration, but it hasn’t been for me on many occasions.

Panel 4

[Image] A hand pushing the back of the woman, who looks startled, and is lurching forward

[Caption] I’ve received physical abuse too. Pushed.

Panel 5

[Image] A hand holding a rainbow flag and pushing it into the woman’s back. The woman looks annoyed.

[Caption] Prodded.

Panel 6

[Image] The woman grasping at her shoulder. A hand has grabbed her bra strap and is pulling.

[Caption] Tugged.

Panel 7

[Image] The woman, looking scared. A hand is shoving a whistle into her mouth.

[Caption] And this. It’s almost always gay men who get physical.

[Speech bubble] Now blow, breeder!

Panel 8

[Image] The woman sitting on a park bench. Behind her, a frowning white man holding a large rainbow flag spits at her. The spit has landed on the woman’s face, and she looks shocked. Her hand is on her cheek where the spit has landed.

[Caption] When biphobia combines with racism, it’s even worse.

Panel 9

[Image] The woman, still sitting on the park bench, but the image is zoomed out. The man holding the large rainbow flag is turned away, and has become a silhouette, blending into a crowd of other silhouettes. The woman is crying and shaking.

[Caption] Sometimes I get so scared at LGBT events that I find myself shaking.

Panel 10

[Caption] If gay and lesbian people don’t understand me – having been on the receiving end of hate themselves – then how will anyone else understand?

Panel 11

[Caption] I once thought Black Pride would be better. But it’s not. It’s just less racist.

Panel 12

[Image] A parade. A white girl is on the back of a truck, and a white man holding a rainbow flag follows on foot. Silhouettes dot the sidewalk beside the parade. One silhouette is darker than the others.

[Caption] I often ask myself why I keep going to these events.

Panel 13

[Image] The same scene, but zoomed in closer on the darker silhouette, who is now shown in full detail. She is a young black woman, smiling widely.

[Caption] But then I’ll see a black face in the crowd…

Panel 14

[Image] A closeup of the young black woman, in the crowd of otherwise white parade-watchers. Her eyes are bright and she is smiling.

[Caption] Black and bi people have told me that my presence really made them feel hopeful, encourage. Being visible is important to me.

Panel 15

[Image] The black woman with the headwrap, smiling, and holding a rainbow-patterned heart against her chest.

[Caption] I shouldn’t hide a big part of myself through fear from the very people who are meant to support me. I just hope the next LGBT event I go to really will be inclusive to all the parts of me.

Full story here.

[biphobia-archive]

cw bimisogyny "bear or bi cis woman"

“bear or man” was to raise awareness against the overwhelming violence cis men do against women and how we cant know what men we can trust

and now these bimisogynistic scums are using it against bi women as if we’re SLIGHTLY comparable

imagine the outrage if it was the opposite

i will say again that your deep hate against bisexual women will make you delusionaly believe bi women are these evil homophobic oppressors, abursers and fetishists as much as cis hetero men

the hate and demonisation against bisexual women is really off the charts

they arent even saying “lesbophobic bi woman” but straight up “bi woman”

i’m so fucking tired of them reducing biphobia inside the sapphic community into “not dating bis” when the problem it’s the insane demonisation as abusers and fetishists and comparing us to cis hetero men

[biphobia-archive]

Ongoing masterlist of articles, reports, papers, and studies about biphobia and bisexual subjectivities (I will add to this list as I gather more materials). Listed by subject matter. Starred articles indicate that this report/article/study is from outside the United States, which I have to emphasize since biphobic idiots think bisexual people have “privilege” in countries outside of the US. 

Any biphobes will be instantly blocked. Also, this post isn’t for transmisogynists and transphobes, so keep your hands off. 

Abuse, sexual violence, assault, fetishization, intimate partner violence, domestic violence, rape: 

Outsourced: What does stalking look like, and what resources are available?

CDC: The National Intimate Partner and Sexual Violence Survey - 2010 Findings on Victimization by Sexual Orientation

Bisexual women nearly twice as likely to be abused by a partner / ONS statistics based in the United Kingdom*

Sexual Victimization and Associated Risks Among Lesbian and Bisexual Women

Bisexual Women, Non-Monogamy and Differentialist Anti-Promiscuity Discourses (based in the UK)*

Filling the Silence: Exploring the Bisexual Experience of Intimate Partner Abuse (based in the UK)* 

Bisexual Women Say #MeToo

Amber Heard Pens Op-Ed About How Abusive Men Stay Protected

8 Relationship Reminders for Bisexual Women That You Don’t Get Nearly Enough

Apphia Kumar’s website* (She was the first person to gain asylum in the United States for being specifically bisexual. She is an Indian woman. When she came out in India, she faced stalking and sexual harassment, forcing her to apply for asylum in the US). 

General demographics, compilations, resources, and studies: 

HRC: Supporting and Caring for Bisexual Youth 

Invisible Majority: The Disparities Facing Bisexual People and how to Remedy them

From Bias to Bisexual Health Disparities: Attitudes Toward Bisexual Men and Women in the United States

Attitudes Toward Bisexual Women and Men

UN: Report of the Independent Expert on protection against violence and discrimination based on sexual orientation and gender identity

Health, access to healthcare, HIV/AIDS, health-related outcomes: 

Bisexual men, women have worst access to health care, UCLA study says / The study in question

IU researcher contributes to prominent journal’s first special section focused on bisexual health

Introduction to the Special Section on Bisexual Health: Can You See Us Now?

Bisexual women most vulnerable to poor health and wellbeing* (based in Australia) 

Disparities in Health-Related Quality of Life: A Comparison of Lesbians and Bisexual Women

I’m Bisexual & Here’s How The “Getting Tested” Conversation Happens With Men Vs. Women

Media bias, media representation, queer theory, and stereotyping: 

What’s in a Name? Bisexuality, Transnational Sexuality Studies and Western Colonial Legacies

The Bisexual Imaginary: Representation, Identity, and Desire

This is the real reason Amber Heard came out as bisexual

Mental illness, psychosocial disorders and outcomes, psychotherapy and resources: 

Affirmative Psychotherapy with Bisexual Women

Becoming Visible: Counseling Bisexuals Across the Lifespan

Poverty, homelessness, food/housing/employment insecurity, educational disparities: 

Bisexual poverty is overlooked by the LGBT+ community 

An Examination of Poverty and Sexual Orientation in the UK* 

Street Outreach Program Data Collection Study 2016

The Truth About Bisexual College Students And Hunger

Substance abuse, alcoholism, addiction: 

Sexual minorities more likely to suffer severe substance use disorders (article) / Actual empirical research study that this article summarizes 

Substance Use and Misuse: Are Bisexual Women at Greater Risk?

Bisexual Women Are More Likely to Suffer from Opioid Misuse, Study Says / The study conducted

[biphobia-archive]

I literally saw this tweet on twitter recently. They purposefully matching with a bisexual person just to unmatch them after asking them if they were bisexual and make them feel like shit all for what???

They also said this shit

this website has a biphobia problem i really cannot stand. yall are truly reinventing the word bihet without actually saying it. like do you think maybe, possibly, there's some kind of systemic reason why bisexuals - esp bi women - seem to repeatedly end up in m/w relationships? do you think like maybe just maybe theres some kind of societal force or something that maybe violently discourages same gender relationships? and do you think like, maybe, that societal force is equally present both inside and outside LGBTQ communities? like maybe idk a non-negligible group of people who literally won't date bisexuals? some kind of bigotry, maybe? just a thought

[biphobia-archive]

[biphobia-archive]

They read the word bisexual and associate it with infidelity and availability, and it’s disrespectful bcs “bisexual = saying ur attracted to other ppl outside your partner

They don’t think being out as a straight/gay is letting people know “they’re attracted to people who are not their spouse”, so..

bisexual is a queer identity, and being bi is what make us capable of loving our partners

[biphobia-archive]

I'm not bi but every time I see biphobia within the LGBTQ+ community it kills me a little bit inside. Especially since 99% of stuff biphobic LGBTQ+ people say about bi people sounds exactly like what cishets say about bi people... Like do they fucking hear themselves? Hello??? 😭

Right?? They are perpetuating the same bigotry towards bisexuals which cishets perpetuate to all of us

[biphobia-archive]

I'm losing it over how TERFs get to market themselves as feminists when they're so quick to drop their support for women's rights the moment the woman in question is bi. Or ace. Or intersex. Or disabled. Or literally any other minority TERFs think is "dirty." One minute they're like "Stop treating women like sexual objects! End sexual violence!" But then the next minute they're making a list of reasons why certain women deserve to be abused ("It's her fault for having a boyfriend! It's her fault for wearing skinny clothes! It's her fault for drinking!"). Just so they can beat down on trans people, a small and vulnerable minority who... Isn't really hurting anyone, especially compared to the conservatives TERFs keep voting for. And so many feminist places online get overrun by TERFs so it's hard to find actual feminists who give a damn about women's rights and aren't going to be misogynists towards women with certain sexual orientations.

I'm so tired. Can we send the TERFs to the sun already. I don't want self-proclaimed "feminists" telling me why I deserve to be abused.

This. Exactly.

[biphobia-archive]

Oh hey look, transphobes kicked out bisexuals too. Honestly good. We don't want to associated with those people.

[biphobia-archive]

[biphobia-archive]

CW biphobia

[biphobia-archive]

An influencer recently realised that she's actually bi, not a lesbian and got awful responses, lost all the support she had, got accused of being a straight woman who lied and got told she was queerbaiting and doing it all for attention and views

Here are some of the comments:

[biphobia-archive]

[biphobia-archive]

[biphobia-archive]

Press coverage of Amber Heard’s sexuality shows that biphobia is alive and well– and has terrible costs

“Amber Heard‘s sexuality is only relevant in that bi women are at far greater risk of experiencing intimate partner violence…”

Photos: Broadimage/REX/Shutterstock/John Salangsang/BFA/Matt Baron/David Fisher/AGF s.r.l.

[biphobia-archive]

CW biphobia