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Just a short thought........

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We may not think about it much but OUR BRAIN IS....the theater of our mind and  what "character" YOU WANT to BECOME, is truly, within your reach to either "RELAX" and be more of a "character" that you visualize enjoying a walk on the beach listening to the ocean waves slowly come in and out, or the "character" of the ideal worker at your job or even an event that's coming up you want to "look the part".... Think about it sometime on how YOU can become the actor/actress you DREAM to BE...

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Case study on "Jane's" Hypnotherapy session to Become More Assertive As A Leader

JANE: “I wanted to inform the regional team about my ideas, but instead, they ripped my idea apart,” recalls Jane (name and characteristics changed for anonymity), a forty-year-old regional head at a sales company. “This incident was one of the reasons I failed the interview for a senior position because I was assessed as not being assertive.”

This story reminds leaders that the people you lead or manage don’t seek the same outcome as you. You believe that your strategy is innovative, but your employees anticipate stress and oppose you. You want to submit an issue to the senior management to debate, but the other department leader hopes to settle it with you to raise their own profile.

Whether in everyday disagreements, negotiations, favor requests or advocating for a solution, our assertiveness often determines the outcome we have.

Assertiveness, is the degree people stand up for their own opinion in interdependent situations in which their own goals are not perfectly aligned with others.

If we are too passive and don’t push hard enough, we fail to reach our goal and risk undermining our leadership position, like in the case of Jane. If, however, we are seen by others as pressing too hard for our own expected outcomes, the other person may resist following along, or our relationship may get compromised.

Here are important characteristics of an assertive leadership style.

• Self-awareness and awareness of others.

• Self-confidence and positive self-esteem.

• Commitment to personal and professional development.

• Self-responsibility, choice and courage.

• Connection and compassion.

• Congruency of values, beliefs and behaviors.

• Vision, passion and communication.

• Learning and development of others.

• Relational and task-focused.

• Managing conflict.

If you look at the list, what characteristics do you apply in your leadership? In which area(s) do you see opportunities to grow?

Though Jane may have just avoided mentioning the incident in the interview overall, she wanted to take this as an opportunity to work on a specific aspect of her leadership style.

So we dived into the dispute.

At a regional retreat, she presented her idea of a new solution to the reporting system that would eventually be rolled out to all regions of the company. And she wanted to spearhead this new initiative.

She mostly showed important aspects of an assertive leader as described above. She had the courage to initiate the process on a regional level; she was task-focused and wanted to connect with her team to bring them on board.

When she presented her idea to her three male colleagues, one of them immediately rejected the solution” as being too much work.”

“His voice was really loud,” she recalls. “I felt pushed, and I felt a pulsating in my left ear, and my thoughts went blank.”

She wasn’t able to lead the following discussion. So the other two colleagues joined and tore her solution into pieces. This revealed two aspects of her assertiveness she wanted to work on: self-confidence and managing conflicts.

You may think now of all the communication tools she could have applied to disperse the argument and stand her ground … and yes, we’re coming to them shortly.

Before that, I want to highlight that Jane was not able to show any assertive behavior because she felt emotionally and mentally blocked. “I felt like a girl left in the rain,” she said, summarizing her experience.

“Why is that so?” I asked her.

And then it came to her. The voice of the person reminded her of her father when he harshly regulated her once at the dinner table, sitting to her left side: “You have nothing to say here as long as you have your feet under my table.”

And her reaction at that time, sitting bomb shelled at the table, got frozen in time together with the voice droning in her left ear.

In a hypnotherapy session, we did a voice-over of her father’s voice with the voice of Donald Duck. Then we oscillated between the original scene and the altered scene until the original scene had completely dissolved.

After that, we reprogrammed the dispute with the regional team. Again the dominant speaker got Donald Duck’s voice, which immediately made her relaxed and calm. She visualized looking into her colleagues’ eyes and expressing her feelings and goals: “I think this is the right solution since this strategy will be rolled out anyway. What further information or adjustments do you need to get a clear idea of this solution?”

It was the tone and volume of another person that triggered Jane’s defense mechanism that brought all her leadership and communication skills to a standstill. Only after this hidden programming was revealed could she apply all verbal and nonverbal strategies to show assertiveness as a leader.

Let’s look in the end at some “keys to being brilliantly confident and more assertive” .

1. Set Boundaries

Make precise offers and be clear regarding what is the frame of the discussion and what objectives you want to achieve with it. Tell people what you’re looking for or what is not working.

2. Use I-Statements

State your opinion with I-statements like “I feel curious about other options,” "I feel sure about this solution” or “I feel we have a lot of feedback on this now.” This shows how you feel about a situation and, at the same time, opens or closes the dialogue.

3. Use Body Language

Look friendly, assured and calm. Stand tall and straight and lean slightly forward, and use your arms to emphasize important aspects.

4. Adjust Your Voice

Keep a relaxed and calm voice without seeming unconcerned. Keep your voice to a middle volume.

Assertiveness comes with your communication style. And your ability to communicate is determined by how you perceive a situation at a given moment on a psychological level.

Oh, and don't count out the value of the power of your mind and how hypnosis could help you as well , just like "Jane"..

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JULY-AUGUST MAGZ PREVIEW from Doug Mac on Vimeo.

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{{NEW SEASON 4 EPISODE}} On the "WHAT-IF" PODCAST SHOW now live on our Podcast platforms. Put on your stereo headphones , click on or paste the link below AND ENJOY THE EXPERIENCE!!:)

https://podcasts.bcast.fm/e/0njxl7ln-the-brain-science-of-audio-self-hypnosis

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SORRY, CAPTAIN KIRK....SPACE...IS NOT...THE FINAL FRONTIER...it's the right side of our brain.. The right side of our brain communicates to our left side with the embedded life experiences we've gone through since birth, and that guides our daily thinking,emotions and goals for ourselves. We CAN CHANGE those thoughts. The link below will show you the page to view the table of contents

https://bit.ly/3Lea4k9

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SORRY, CAPTAIN KIRK....SPACE...IS NOT...THE FINAL FRONTIER...it's the right side of our brain.. The right side of our brain communicates to our left side with the embedded life experiences we've gone through since birth, and that guides our daily thinking, emotions and goals for ourselves. We CAN CHANGE those thoughts. The link below will show you the page to view the table of contents

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WHAT IF......the next time you get a great idea but "thoughts" pop into your head as to "why" it won't work, WHAT IF YOU COULD BYPASS those "why it won't work thoughts"  AND NOT Limit your thinking? WHO THEN, would you become on that NO LIMITATIONS JOURNEY?

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I've PERSONALLY, had a hard time WITH THIS MYSELF so I wanted to share a quick lesson on how I've had to deal with this in a short quick "Main Points Only" Solution...

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QUICK  COUPLE OF LESSONS ON HOW TO Encourage your brain to BECOME MORE DICIPLINED....ENJOY!!

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Have you ever wondered WHAT SIDE OF YOUR BRAIN gets ELECTRICALLY CHARGED when you try to make a decision or "THINK-THROUGH" something? This infographic tells it all...

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In this week's podcast show, we answer "Mary P.'s" question about how audio hypnosis actually works, do we really "sleep" while we are under hypnosis, and can our subconscious hear others talk to us when we are not awake or in a medically induced coma. https://anchor.fm/doug-mac/episodes/ANSWERING-MARY-P-s-question-about-audio-hypnosis--hypnotic-sleep-and-can-people-in-a-coma-hear-us-e14884c

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As promised, the new book , Hypnochoices, for beginners, is now live at THEDougMac.com. The video is a little preview. Happy 4th..on the ...5th...everybody!! :)

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As promised , the new book, “Hypnochoices” is now live at THEDougMac.com

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Although there is no SAX, you may have a little surprise...

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THE ANATOMY OF YOUR BRAIN AND HOW IT WORKS IN YOUR DAILY LIFE- FREE“LIVE” LECTURE RECORDING

THIS WEEKS POST IS FROM  THE SERIES OF "LIVE" LECTURES  (FREE on our website )GIVEN TO MEDICAL STUDENTS BEFORE THEIR MEDICAL OFFICE INTERNSHIP BY DOUG MAC ON THE ANATOMY & PHYSIOLOGY OF THE BRAIN AND HOW IT CAN HELP US CREATE CHANGE IN OUR LIVES. The post below is one of two featured on our website at www.douglasmcgehee.com on brain science. CLICK PLAY TO LISTEN TO THE "LIVE" LECTURE AT:  https://bit.ly/3uEVU3Y