bloodredscarlett - Tumblr blog

[bloodredscarlett]

Everything came back to her slowly, and it came back to her all at once - the sting of the whip and the burn of shame, and that sick, slick, crimson stained snow. It was everything and it was nothing, nothing more than the past now, as her eyes fluttered open, and she was looking up at a ceiling that wasn't Jade's. She sat up too quickly, panic forcing her to move before her mind had caught up, a ragged gasp that twisted itself into a pained cry spilling from lips. She sunk back against the pillow, a low hiss escaping her at the fire that still licked at her body, as her mismatched eyes found Camilla. "Cami?" Her name came out on an unsteady breath, and Scarlett's eyes were glassy, involuntarily tearing, her teeth clenched against the thousands of invisible whips that still felt like they were tearing her open.

Thin fingers were cool around her own, and her palm turned upwards reflexively, holding on to them, to her, a reminder of why she had to be the one to do this. Camilla looked tired, she looked more breakable, more fragile, more broken than ever, and Scarlett squeezed her fingers, holding her dark eyes, not trusting her voice to speak. She wanted to reach up to touch her face, to pull her close and hold her, but everything hurt, her jaw was locked tight and all she could do was look at her, and hope that was enough.

Fix Me (I'm Not Broken) || Scarmilla

[bloodredscarlett]

She could hear her. Some part of Scarlett could hear Camilla's voice, and she focused on that, as the blurry form of her loped into view. Everything was red, bleeding red, burning red, and when she looked at her own hands they were as blood-slick as if she'd done the whipping herself, from struggling to pull her shirt on. Every other colour was bleeding away, leaving nothing but red, and she was cold, and Camilla's lips were warm and soft on her forehead and she was too tired to fight. "I'm... fine..." The words came hissed through her teeth as she felt herself being pulled upwards and out into the rain. Pain shot though her back, roaring out across every inch of her skin, and it was too much, there was just too much blood. She felt herself flop back down, a pained gasp leaving her lips as her broken back hit cold, wet, leather, and just like that, everything fell away to black.

Fix Me (I'm Not Broken) || Scarmilla

[bloodredscarlett]

Fix Me (I'm Not Broken) || Scarmilla

Spinning. Everything was spinning, and her shirt was soaked, liquid warmth pouring down her back and leaving her head clouded with an impossibly thick, spinning fog. It was a slow stumble and a desperate crawl from the punishment house doors and back to her car, but nobody would have the satisfaction of hearing her ask for help. Slick crimson left a bloody trail behind her in the snow, but she made it, and there were frozen tears in her eyes but none on her cheeks, when she finally climbed into her car. Scarlett knew she shouldn't be driving; she knew like she knew so many things, the exact shade of hazel in Jade's eyes, the strange lilt on Aria's words that showed itself more when she was angry, the longing note in Camilla's voice when she looked at the door and asked her if she'd be staying the night.

Leather was cold and slick against her hot, broken back, and somehow the pain was enough to keep her present, to keep mismatched eyes struggling back to the road each time they drifted away, until she was up the Hawthorne's long driveway and parked at an odd angle, half, in half out of her door, finally feeling too tired to walk any further. She wanted to go home, she wanted Jade and her bed and the smell of her shampoo, but she couldn't let her sister see her, not like this. She wanted to push herself up and out of the car, but she could feel the colour draining from her cheeks, the fog growing thicker, descending around her temples and coming down over her eyes, and she knew that too, was impossible. Leaning her head back against the headrest, a sharp gasp escaping her as twenty five poorly given lashes screamed in protest, she raised a hand and brought it down on the horn, the sound blurring out, barely cutting through the fog, as she leaned back and prayed that Camilla would come for her, herself. She couldn't stomach the idea of anyone else seeing her like this.

[bloodredscarlett]

[Private]

[bloodredscarlett]

I already told you, if I ever can't, just... take care of her. 

[Private]

[bloodredscarlett]

I'll be okay. You don't have to make me promises, Cami.

[Private]

[bloodredscarlett]

Could you have lived with twenty lashes? You wanted me to come back to you, and be there when it matters... just, let me. 

[Private]

[Private] Why did you do it Scarlett?

[bloodredscarlett]

[Private] Thank you Scarlett, you've.. you've rescued my family in a way that I never could.

[Private]  I didn't do it for them.

[bloodredscarlett]

[Private] Scarlett, I just.. Why? But, thank you, thank you, I can't ever repay you, I don't know what I'll ever do. I'll take care of Jade, of course.

[Private] Does it matter? I always come back when it counts, I told you.

[bloodredscarlett]

What are you doing?

[Private] Don't ask me that, you know, and it's done. If anything ever... If I'm not around, you take care of Jade, okay? You don't owe me anything, just, promise me that?

[bloodredscarlett]

She Wolf (Falling To Pieces) || Scarlett (Closed)

Camilla Hawthorne. The woman was a thorn in her side and she was a saving grace, and in the last four years she had hated her and envied her and cared for her, and Scarlett had even wondered if in some way, she had loved her. Camilla was delicate, she was crystal champagne flutes and Egyptian cotton sheets, and twenty lashes would ruin her, something Scarlett had known only too well when she heard the announcement that she had switched out for her sister. She'd been livid, but how could she question that? She'd do the same, she'd done the same all her life, a hundred beatings to keep Jade from one, a dark broken thing forced into her chest, so hazel eyes could always see the light; but Camilla wasn't her, and this would ruin her. Scarlett knew ruin, it was the monster that lived under her bed and meant she never slept there alone; she knew ruin and she knew how to survive in its shadow.

Thin knuckles rapped on hard wood, she stepped inside, and it was over. 

[bloodredscarlett]

[bloodredscarlett]

Say what, the truth? You shouldn't have... Jesus, Cami... I'll fix it... just... Don't speak to them again, okay? I'll think of something.

[Private]

[bloodredscarlett]

Do you think you can bear this? Twenty fucking lashes is going to split your back so badly that it will never heal right, it's going to be long and exhausting and ugly, Cami... Fuck. I just... I was handling it.

[Private]

[bloodredscarlett]

What the fuck did you just do?! I told you I was going to fix it... Fuck...

[Private]

[bloodredscarlett]

Test me if you want, but I suggest that for every time I've told you, you do as I say.

Fif-fifteen? [Private]

You’ve told me that too many times.

[bloodredscarlett]

Just... Don't tell them anything else. Keep your mouth shut.

Fif-fifteen? [Private]

I told her to take a bath… I don’t know if she did or not. I just have to do it, there’s no other option.