blueoctober17

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Antonio Frilli, “Sweet Dreams”, Marble sculpture (𝟣𝟪𝟫𝟤).

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ONE DAY YOU WON'T BE HERE ANYMORE. I WON'T FORGET THAT DAY; ON ABANDONMENT

girlpool // past lives // clarice lispector // past lives // clementine von radics // saw // richard siken // leah horlick.

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Past Lives (2023) dir. Celine Song

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Past Lives (2023)

Dir. Celine Song

Language: Korean, English

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In Strange Seas (detail), c. 1889.

George Willoughby Maynard (American, 1843–1923)

Oil on canvas

91.8 x 127.8 cm

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I lost my best friend 3 years ago- not lost as in dead but lost as in we only text each other on our birthdays now. Movies and books don't tell you that a friendship dying is like the sinking of a ship, you try to get higher and higher and hold onto the rails and unanswered texts, the captain tries to steer it to safety and salvage pieces of two broken hearts until you're left with memories of what once was. We were friends for a decade and knew each other's diaries by heart, I still remember her phone number and the way she took her coffee. Seeing her in streets is like breathing in a scent you forgot you knew but it immediately takes you back to a summer in '07.

Movies and books also don't tell you that friendships don't just end after one fight or incident, it's like the rusting of a bridge, the slow decay of flesh and bones and secrets. It took weeks, months- until one day I woke up and I realized I hadn't thought of her in a while. And I wrote a poem that day and I titled it 'The dying of a best friend' and I put all my love for her in a tiny box with my half of the matching pendant of a dolphin we had and stored them in a corner of my heart under the heading Grief. Where else can one hide unspent love?

It's been 3 years since I lost my best friend, lost as in I still carry our secrets in a tiny box but we only text each other on our birthdays.

-Ritika Jyala, excerpt from The world is a sphere of ice and our hands are made of fire

Edit: here's the visualizer for this piece

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Decision to Leave (2022) | dir. Park Chan-wook

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헤어질 결심 - Decision to Leave 2022 — dir. Park Chan-wook

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The Crown, Season 5 Episode 4

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fourelephants

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What the Manic Pixie Dream Girl is: a fun loving fictional woman whose entire personality is helping the male protagonist achieve self actualization and is never seen as a human by the text.

What the internet thinks the Manic Pixie Dream Girl is: women having hobbies, personality quirks, and a well developed personal style

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my favorite films and series all being about failed love stories is very Pisces of me

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“We only live in the cities, the fever, work - and yet you and I are made for this earth, for the light, the quiet joy of the bodies, the peace of the heart. We will have to change all that, won’t we? It will be necessary to live, love, enjoy in happiness. Of course, we have struggled for a long time until now and we have not had time to give up. But now that we have gained our certainty, we can find the reward, run away from all this hideous vanity around us, and live a little more in the truth.”

— Albert Camus to Maria Casarès, Correspondance, January 21, 1950 [#140]

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every movie i watched in 2022  ⇢  new moon (2009) dir. chris weitz

“you can’t protect me from everything — at some point something’s going to separate us. it’s gonna be an accident, or illness, or old age… as long as i’m human. and the only solution is to change me.”

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“People are always angry at anyone who chooses very individual standards for his life; because of the extraordinary treatment which that man grants to himself, they feel degraded, like ordinary beings.”

— Friedrich Nietzsche, Human, All Too Human, 495