boogiegxrl-moved - Tumblr blog

[boogiegxrl-moved]

I’VE MOVED SHOCK TO MY MULTI-MUSE ACCOUNT PLEASE FIND HER OVER AT @canonfoddcr

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I know that there’s something that maybe is almost an Internet thing, where I am exposed and known, and I understand that. But compared to some of the people that I know, I don’t really feel like I’m a very famous person. The only time when it’s different is usually when I’m spending time with a more famous person, and my spot gets blown up, and it’s irritating.I feel like I do my work for everybody, but there’s a certain group of people that take it in. It’s not super mainstream. It’s a really peaceful existence. I don’t get paparazzi’d at the airport. I feel safe.

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notxthedumbone:

   ❝Who CARES if it’s New Year’s WHATEVER. STOP WITH THE STUPID KISSIN’!!❞ It’s GROSS.  

 “We were just talking about your porn collection and you’re SERIOUSLY telling me you think that KISSING is gross?”

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   “It’s because it’s New Year’s Eve, idiot. If you’d ever had a girlfriend, you’d have known that.”

    ❝What’s with all the KISSING?? Stop it now!!❞

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snakeandspiderstew:

“Ow. Bitch.” It didn’t hurt–that bad, anyway–but Lock felt the need to complain about it anyway. “I was hoping you’d died and we wouldn’t have to deal with you anymore.”

   “You wish, numb-nuts.” She flicks his nose, for good luck. “If I ever did die you and Barrel would probably self-combust without me.”

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  Casually walks up and slaps him on the back of the head

@boogiegxrl

Cue the loud whining.

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notxthedumbone:

      Barrel GROANS. He hates Shock’s stupid cats–all rangy && m e a n like their owner. He thumps his head against the table again for good measure. He’s not a child. He’s in this stupid teenaged body && this stupid teenaged body has dumb NEEDS. He shoots up, pacing the cramped-to-hell living room, his face screwed up grotesquely. ❝’Unlike yoooo—-u, I’ve got blahblahblah blah I’m a borin’ ol’ witch’,❞ he mocks, fingers fidgeting with the urge to destroy something or build something or something.  ❝Work!❞ Spitting out the word like it personally offended him, Barrel stops in his tracks, stumbles, && then points. ❝What are ya? Some kinda upstandin’ citizen there, Shock? C’mon. Let’s go have fun.❞ Right now. Before Barrel blows.      

“Herf derf derf, I’m Barrel and I’m too stupid to know how to blacklist tags on pornhub.” She pulls a face and mimes wanking, making fart noises in time with the up and down motion of her hand.

“Yeah, work. Making potions, grinding bones, doing literally anything other than sit around vibrating uselessly, you dummy.”

Shock raises her hand and a pumpkin-scented candle comes flying across the room to smack Barrel in the face. She’s been practicing that trick for ages. That’s her idea of fun.

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For your consideration: Lock Shock and Barrel are kids, and they are trick or treaters, so when they grow up they digivolve into representations of those shitty teens who throw toilet roll and eggs at people’s houses and come round at like 11 pm demanding candy even though they’re only wearing like the bare minimum of spooky costume items.

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top 20 parks characters (as voted by our followers): 12: Mona-Lisa Saperstein

Do you know how many different pills I take, birth control or otherwise? There is no way that I could be pregnant with a human baby.

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open

   “I can’t believe we’re almost a quarter of the way to next Halloween!” She’s loudly ignoring the fact that it’s just been Christmas.

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notxthedumbone:

    ❝I can’t not jerk off, Shock!!❞ Barrel whines, his voice an irritating rasp. He’s a growing boy–or something…kindasorta resembling one–he’s got NEEDS. && if they aren’t going to use Christmas to get some mayhem in, he has to burn off all this energy somehow. He’s already banned from the kitchen, the living room, && the pantry after the last time this sort of thing happened!! He flops over, head hitting the scarred table with a solid ‘thunk’. UGH. Imagination. Shut up, Shock.

   “You boys and your dicks.” She rolls her eyes. Shock has never had a dog but she imagines Barrel is almost like one- you have to let him burn off steam or he’ll pee on your carpet or something.

   “If you stop talking about porn, I’ll let you play with my cats. I need to get back to work.” She turns her nose up towards the ceiling and flicks a ratty curl of hair over her shoulder haughtily. “Unlike you, I’ve got constructive things to do with my life.” Necromancy is constructive, mostly.

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notxthedumbone:

   He scrolls down. && keeps scrolling. && keeps scrolling. Nothing but Santa fucking elves, elves fucking weirdos dressed up as reindeer, &&  candy canes shoved up places they should not be shoved. Oh for fuck’s sake— Barrel slams the laptop lid close && shoves the thing far, far, far away from him.

   Shock leans over his shoulder and tracks the images as they scroll across the page. If she’d had a soul it would have completely left her body by now. At the very least she can see why Barrel kept looking- it’s like a car accident, it’s hard to look away.

    “Well you know what your only choices are now- don’t masturbate, though I know that would be almost impossible for you, or...use your imagination.” She makes a rainbow arch with her hands and wiggles her fingers sarcastically.

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im lame but shock is a real witch with real magical powers!!  she’s getting into necromancy.

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   “You sound upset, and yet you still watched it.” Shock pulls a face, trying to push away the mental image of Barrel jerking it in front of a computer. “If you were smart you’d just scroll past the Santa stuff.”

    ❝Everything is Santa. Even my porn.❞ Especially his porn. Here is he, idly browsing his favorite (free) sites, && ALL HE SEES are bearded assholes plowing skimpily-dressed elves. It’s enough to kill his boner for LIFE.

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some headcanons I’m feeling right off the bat about Shock:

- she has a lot of pets but is really shitty at taking care of them. refuses to accept that it’s ever her fault when they inevitably die or go missing.

- would be the kind of person who would post memes about how her taste in music is better than anyone else’s

- the reason her hair looks so frizzy and terrible is because she eats the ends of it. split end central.

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conceptually I like the idea of taking a female side character who’s personality in canon is just ‘girl’ and making her into an interesting character, but I haven’t tried it before today. that’s really why I wanted to go ahead and make Shock. I can do anything with her. the world is my oyster.