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pausing torture to let the victim know i don’t personally get anything out of this sexually and if i did get off on torture they are nottt the one i would pick bc i find them kind of repulsive lol but anyway yeah i’m not like some kind of pervert this is old fashioned love of the game. you know you’re like kind of unresponsive and shitty to talk to. like i’m giving you information about my life this is a conversation. you should work on that it’s really unpleasant. Anyway so this one is called the “scavengers daughter”

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To my beauties out there that share the Heinz is trans headcanon, please consider: he has a wonderfully realistic pack n play type prosthetic that he made himself, and it only took him three models to remove the self destruct button

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What if the helpful tips (rules) were added because Perry did it all at least once and they had to stop him somehow

What do you mean you agreed to help him move? Ok fine, help him on your off hours.

WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU OFFERED HIM A TRUCK FROM THE AGENCY?

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● I mean you are the one who put him in the hospital, but if he'll accept it you can send a note.

● Agent P, care to explain this highly inappropriate christmas card?

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You will NOT pay for his rent.

Why not? I—

HIS EX IS LOADED. HE'S TAKING ADVANTAGE OF YOU!!!

Also the sometimes offer to treat was put down because otherwise Perry would always pay for their dates.

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Heinz just going “im evil again now” with no explanation i like bc it means they didnt need to write in an explanation for All the different ending verses. He becomes an agent? He becomes a teacher? He becomes prof time? He just keeps doing evil forever? All of them could technically lead into season 5 No Worries.

Which like thank fuck for that because otherwise they’d have to either a) decide on what was the canon ending to the og series instead of having their fun “HERES LIKE EIGHT WAYS IT COULD GO YAAAAY YIPPEEEE”, or b) they would have to try and make complicated justification for every possible end they had, like, tie them all together and say all of them were the True Real Canon Ending.

This way it’s just… what was he up to really this past year? Idk you fill in the blank we gave you the options already..

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Consider this: butchjeet also. Come join me in the space that is butch4butch bujeet, holding my hands out to u

butchford and femjeet. send tweet

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Revival is real good so far btw. I like that they decided to open up with a junji ito ref in the first episode, something that is for me and like three other freaks only

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I put on a tough face because deep down I am so obedient and submissive. I will only ever belong exclusively to the man who is brave enough to stalk all of my something awful posts

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DOOFDAILY ==> BREADBOWLHOTTUB

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THE ZINE IS OPEN!

The moment is here — the admission forms for our "A zine? A Perry the Human fanzine!?" are officially OPEN! 🎉

Whether you’re a fanartist, a fanfic writer, or wanna collaborate in any way, now’s your chance to join this awesome project made by fans, for fans. 💖

📝 Fill out the form, tell us about your Perry, and get ready to create something amazing with the community!

Deadline to apply: June 25th

Got questions? Hit us up anytime — we’re here to help!

Let’s make magic happen this summer! ☀️🔥

👉 [Link to the form] 👈

Spread the word and see you inside! 💫

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My headcanon for Parenthesis is that the flea body is also a robot. The fleabot designed more for spying, something tiny he can pilot in and out of places with ease- and the human bot is a protective shell he made for it so it wouldn’t get damaged, something he made based on himself as well. That’s right folks, he put a hat on a hat, he built a him mech for his little remote control robofleasona.

Of course, that raises da question, hey, why not just go there himself if he’s going to send a robot that now possesses none of the size and stealth of his fleabot? To which he would say are you crazy. Are you stupid. Go in person to the owca headquarters and try to take it over? They’d kill him! He’d die! They could kick his entire head off or something!!!

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He’s got theinator that makes pigeons shit on everything and shoots only son with it and everyone at love muffin is like hold on… let him cook… and Heinz finds out when dr diminutive is gossiping with him and mentions it. It’s not enough to find out in the news, no, to have one of his friends tell him…

Also roger is still the mayor in this au btw. He’s just evil now. Tristate areas first pharmacist mayor

Au where roger becomes a villain because Only Son is now the president of America and frankly at that stage what else can you do really about the family trauma

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Bread

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Mammu! Finius and Ferbingetorix built Rome in a day!

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Lost in Danville's plot, more or less

Inspired by:

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To make matters worse Only Son isn’t even alive for his term. They had him stuffed decades ago.