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Hey why is zooble and gangle so gay this episode

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Did you know the initials of Shoot From The Hip actually stand for each member's name!

Sam

FLuke

Tom

Halexander Jeremy

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Why do you use It/Its pronouns...

i got tagged in elementary school and never recovered

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Joel this episode

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ohhhhh!!!

OKAY.

Soooooo.... I'm about to reveal something cool.

Is this because I've just left school? Yes!

Is this also because I need a reason to get the second part of this written? Also yes!

So...

Here's the first part of one of my two-parter episode ideas!

It's got Morwyn and Ophelia! It's got a post Hell Bent but pre THORS Twelve! It's got Clockwork Droids, 1920s San Francisco and FINALLY some reasoning for why Twelve mentions a piano falling on him-

Episode 1: (Haven't got a name for it yet)

Cold Open: We follow a man as he's serving a customer. His cheerful demeanour is increased, by the look on his face, as we cut to the stage of the speakeasy. A remarkably dressed lady is serenading the crowd of spectators with a tuneful, upbeat dance number. As she finishes, she winks at the bartender, and the camera zooms in on the, strangely enough, orange hue of his eyes, showing that he's not human. The intro plays!

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As we fade back, we see the console room of the TARDIS, as the Twelfth Doctor sways to the jazz music playing (maybe Frank Sinatra) and adjusting the levers and buttons. His head thrums, but he's only fazed for a second before continuing. 

He steps out into San Francisco, 1925, the high time for Prohibition. As he ventures into the city and reaches the same speakeasy, the Doctor hears a commotion and heads towards an alleyway. 

There, we see a gang member getting riled up by another man, and he ends up getting killed, before he and his assailant get whisked away by a sort of teleportation thing. The Doctor's too slow to catch them, but the blood is still there. 

We cut to the bartender and the singer from the cold open, and the latter has changed into a more casual outfit, suspenders with a shirt with some of the top buttons undone, and a classy pocketwatch in her pocket. 

They're talking about the recent cases of police finding murder scenes across San Fran, but no bodies and, more importantly, no trace of movement of said bodies. It was like there was a murder, but no traces of the victim or assailant at all, even where either of them could have gone. 

As they talk, the Doctor rushes into them, only for the bartender to push them threateningly (and dare I say, quite attractively) into the wall. 

"Who are you, mister? You don't look like you're from around here." The girl says in, strikingly, a British accent.

"I could say the same about you. How did you get here?" The Doctor responds in a highly interested manner. 

"By ship, obviously. It's not cheap but it's considerable seeming by the boom around these parts." The bartender answers for her.

"Now, now, Amarion. This gentleman seems...approachable." She says, gesturing the bartender to let him off from the wall as she looks him up and down.

"Thanks for that. I'm the Doctor by the way." 

The girl pulls out an ID. "Well, you certainly didn't find the right place for people like you. Detective Ophelia Witcher, at your humble service."

"Ophelia..." The Doctor rolled the name around for a bit. "Like the girl in Hamlet." 

She smiled, knowing that someone finally got the reference that she wanted when she chose the name. "Go to thy deathbed, he will never come again. My mother liked Shakespeare's works. She must have taken a liking to her madness."

"And you, who looked remarkably close to murdering me a minute ago?" The Doctor smirked at the man.

"Amarion Finch, assistant to Miss Witcher and a close confidant-" 

"Closest confidant, mister-"

"To Miss Witcher over here. I was her mentor in school, offered to travel with her."

"And don't you love it." Ophelia joked, wrapping an arm around his shoulder. 

"Okay, so you two are working on whatever this is?" The Doctor stared at the two of them, his head turning to each in turn.

"Well, my office is a few blocks away, but I think we need to sample some of this blood."  Ophelia began, only to see the Doctor pull out his sonic and scan the site. 

"What, pray tell, are you doing with that?" Amarion questioned. 

"Scanning the blood for DNA, lets me find out who this person was and, more vitally, where to go next." The Doctor began to walk towards the TARDIS. "Come on, Holmes and Poirot, or are you two as fictional as each other?"

Ophelia and Amarion followed suit, after looking at each other in a "I don't know who this is, but let's go with him" manner. They both pull out their watches, each stroking the intricate, Gallifreyan style on the top, before running off to join him. 

They go to Ophelia's office, and the two detectives begin to give him the lowdown, and their voices fade as the camera pans down to someone watching them. They tilt their head, showing that they have a red eye and brown eye, before teleporting out of the street. The camera pans up, back to Ophelia, Amarion and the Doctor as the conversation ends (we can only assume that they told the Doctor the info that they were discussing before in the alleyway) and Ophelia holds her hand out to him. "So, Doctor, care to help us?" 

He thought for a second, before shaking her hand. "Gladly. So...where do we start?"

We cut to the three of them entering the speakeasy again, as Ophelia explains in a voiceover to "talk to people about the incidents. The less drunk, the better, although if there's police around then talk to them regardless. We need all the information we can get." 

After a slight montage, we home in on an exchange between Amarion and a fancy flapper who happened to be close to the man who died. As he finishes his conversation, she mentions how Ophelia has the exact same pocket watch. He smiles and talks about how close they are, how they're like brother and sister and that's why they have the same watch (no other reason, don't worry....that's called foreshadowing!)

The Doctor grabs onto Amarion and yanks him into following him, followed by Ophelia being dealt the same cards, as he mutters about an abandoned speakeasy that he was told about. 

As they head inside, the trio get spotted by a group of mobsters, and as they run after the group one of them goes head first into a pole. Water spews out, and we find out that the mobsters are CLOCKWORK DROIDS. And now one of them's down for the count. As the Doctor gets cornered onto the stage, and Ophelia bats them away from herself and Amarion, a mechanism that we would've seen earlier as they came in starts to run, leading to a piano falling right where the Doctor is standing. Amarion pushes him out the way, the piano falls, and as Ophelia screams out, WE CUT TO BLACK AND THE CREDITS ROLL!

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Okay, so Amarion Finch = Morwyn, and yes that starting bit was because (I think) PCap used to sing Frank Sinatra songs to warm up. Which I think is quite cool!

Hopefully you enjoyed reading this! And hopefully over the next few days I'll be able to finish the second parter!

See you in the stars!

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Invented tboy swag

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another banger tweet reply from the man himself

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you know what? i'm done. i'm gonna [remembers suicide jokes are bad for my mental health] become a teMPLE TO DESTRUCTION. AN ENGINE OF WAR. A PYRAMID HOUSING THE HATRED OF THOUSANDS. A STADIUM WITH A ROAR OF RAGE BECOMES THE BITTER JUICE OF DESOLATION.

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I'm going to [remembers suicide jokes are bad for my mental health] RECOGNISE WOMEN!!

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I had a dream last night that @satan-offical kept responding with any anon hate with “those who tumble” and it was the funniest shit ever

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breakfast

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Jo grant at companion support meetings

"And i suspose it was quite unfair of the timelords to put the doctor in the 70s of all times. And they mustve known the master would show up too. God knows theyd follow each other every where. I just think if their inital meeting was somewhere a bit less homophobic, and a bit more progressive i could sorted them out in five minutes with a marriage counselor"

Every other companion choking on water: with a *what*

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it's beautiful

My friend @breadbut3d stole my tablet.again

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this sucks I'm gonna (remembers suicide jokes are bad for my mental health) invent time penetration

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I look away for ONE SECOND and it's 00:03. I swear it was 9pm two seconds ago what the fuck??

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There's no issue in cishet people not fully understanding every kind of gender identity and sexual/romantic orientation. You don't have to understand every identity and orientation within the LGBTQIA+ community. But showing genuine confusion and interest in my own orientation and then saying "forget it, idc" the moment I start explaining who I am, it kinda fucking hurts, man.

(I'm totally not venting about a recent event)

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I don’t crush on fictional characters I crush on the characters together. Dating that one character myself? Ew no. Putting those two characters together like barbie dolls and making them kiss? Yes please