britbi

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“i can leave the door open while i’m cleaning my bathroom,” i reasoned to myself. “surely my beloved cat, Meatball, isn’t dumb enough to try and jump into an open toilet full of Clorox”

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I kill you

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tumblr users love reading. you literally stopped for this post just because it has words in it

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How did you train your cats to not wake you up?

By rolling over and stubbornly feigning sleep if they did.

Their brains are little cause-effect engines. If standing next to your face and yelling until you feed them doesn't actually produce that result, they'll eventually stop doing it. You just have to outlast them.

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“shark infested waters” bro they just live there 

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Previous polls have already established that a lot of tumblr users don't want children. This poll asks why.

"body is theoretically capable of bearing children" = you have the body parts required to be pregnant. If you've had a procedure that removes the ability to get pregnant (e.g. tubal ligation, hysterectomy, etc), vote as you would have if you had not had that. If you have other conditions that make you unable to carry a pregnancy, use your best judgement to decide how to vote.

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We ask your questions anonymously so you don’t have to! Submissions are open on the 1st and 15th of the month.

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There are gonna be people who won't like hearing this but if you want to live in a world where mixed marriages, families, and adoptions (particularly POC adopting outside their "race") aren't maligned and discriminated against, then you have got to get more chill about seeing someone partaking in something cultural that you don't think fits the "race" you perceive them as.

[britbi]

sunday 3pm activities:

opening the fridge

youtubes

looking out of the windows with arms folded behind my back

opening the fridge

melancholy

sit on the couch and sigh

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How to Successfully Study in the Library

bring all of your materials with you

find a nice quiet spot void of distractions 

make sure to take little breaks every half hour or so

maybe bring a little snack

don’t look at the giant floating baby

just don’t 

try to forget about the giant floating baby in the library 

use different colors of highlighters to organize your notes  

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It wimdy

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"What are you gonna bring to our company" being on tumblr on company time

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horrifying 

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crochet aquarium

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what it feels like asking anyone 1+ years younger than me if they wanna hang out

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overheard these two guys talking and they're like. very obviously cowboys and one of them goes "man when I was young I used to think everyone had horses I didn't even know there were ppl w/o horses" and the other one goes "shows how horseified we are"