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March 09, 2017

This man right here has stole my heart since Day 1. It’s been 194 days since the first time we laid our eyes on each other, talk about few things and had fun for a limited time. We both may have seen each other before but only to claim each other as acquaintances. Naalala ko pa nung HS days, na kahit ahead ako ng 2 years sakanya, most of my classmates would call him “papa/fafa cjay”. Well, it’s true na from a young age and super totoy look pa sya before, ang lakas ng sex appeal nya. Never man ako nagkacrush or interest sakanya, but I never thought na magiging love interest ko naman sya more than 5 years later. Maybe we weren’t destined to meet each other personally before, there were huge chances na pwede kaming maging friends but God set a borderline in between. Only to find out na we were destined to meet each other someday. It took alot of years, dumami man mga dumaan sa buhay namin but maybe those people served as a lesson and a challenge for us to be a better man/woman for our future lifetime partner. I cannot say na he’s the one for me, the person I’ll be spending the rest of my life with. But what my heart tells and prays repeatedly, that he is. 

Sobrang swerte ko sa taong to. Everything was so unexpected. I even question myself everyday na, “Possible bang mainlove sa tao araw araw? Like literal na everyday nag ggrow ung feelings mo?” Kasi ganun na ganun ung nararamdaman ko sa boyfriend ko. Kinikilig padin ako everyday. Yung panahon na nagkakachat palang kami and nagkakakilanlan, ganon na ganon padin ung feeling ng hype and excitement ko na makausap ko sya na kahit boyfriend ko na sya ngayon. I’ve never felt something like this before, kung inlove man ako sa past relationships ko before, hindi naging ganito kalakas ung tama and sincerity sa isa’t isa. Maybe I was too blinded how love works before. Hindi lang pala sapat na mahal ko ung tao. Kasi dapat lang talaga mahalin mo muna ang sarili mo because that way you’ll know how to love someone so special na hindi mo aakalain na may mas maibibigay ka pa sa inakala mo. 

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February 14, 2017 ❤️

Happy Valentine’s Day to my Cjay oppa~ To be honest, I really don’t know what came into your mind that you have to do that kind of pose. Alam kong goods na sayo ang kdrama, but I would be happier kung parehas tayong kpop stan. LOL (in my dreams) :)) *exit kpop lykha*

So the night before 0214, Cjay and I were chatting like the usual thing we do everyday. If I could remember a week before, we’ve told each other na Valentine’s Day will land on a weekday, Tuesday to be exact. Means, di kami pwedeng magkita because of school. I understand the point naman and thought na we could still celebrate valentine’s day on weekends. 

But I was too oblivious that night nung sinabi nyang “Ang bilis ng wifi sa dorm” and I thought na baka may bagong router sa dorm na it’s easy for them na makasagap ng signal. But that speculation of mine was totally wrong. Because the next day my mom woke me up like she was in a hurry yet a smile curved into her lips and said, “Nak, nak.. Gising! Si Cjay nasa baba.” Para akong naalimpungatan because unang una sa lahat, how could that be possible? Nasa dorm sya last night and we agreed na sa ibang araw nalang icelebrate ang valentine’s day? So when my mom walked out of my room, sabi ko sa sarili ko “Baka nananaginip lang ako” so I placed back my eye mask and went back to sleep. Pero wala pang 1 minute nung binalikan ako ni mama and she keeps on poking me, “Uy gising na nak, andyan si Cjay sa baba.” Nung una nainis pa ako, pero sa kakaulit ni mama it finally hit me. “Talaga bang nandito si Cjay?!” I jumped out my bed and rush down the stairs, nakalimutan ko na I had that JWU look and it’ll be the first time na makikita ako ni Cjay na wala kahit anong make up sa mukha. 

I was caught off guard when I realized na I wasn’t dreaming or naalimpungatan. It was real and startling the moment I saw him sitting on the couch with a bouquet and a basket of chickenjoy which I didn’t know at first. Sobrang hindi ako makapaniwala and I was a hundred percent surprised at paulit ulit na umiikot sa isip ko and tanong na, “Totoo ba ‘to?” And to receive such thing sa valentines day is my first time as well. On that day nafeel kong babaeng babae ako :D pero tbh, he doesn’t have to do that because presence palang nya buong buo na araw ko. I’m really not into material things because para sakin, basta buong pag mamahal lang kuntento nako. But above all my obscurity, “Kung nandito sya, nagkakilala na sila ni mama?!” Sobrang late ng reaction ko but yes they did. Sa sobrang pagkasurprised ko, hindi ko man lang sya nabati agad ng ‘Happy Valentine’s Day’ HAHAHA!

So we spent the whole day together, I’m quite guilty na he had to skip the whole class just to spend his time with me. Ang saya pala sa feeling na mapapunta ko personally ung taong mahal ko sa bahay namin mismo and alam ng mom ko na boyfriend ko sya. No biggies to mom and hinayaan nya lang kami magstay sa living room as we played games, mag snapchat, mag usap and steal kisses to each other hehehe 

I love you, Cjay. Ikaw yung pinaka special guy for me. You have made me the happiest, and I know for sure I wouldn’t feel this way with anyone else. We might have not been so far yet, we’re starting this journey pa lang, but I am grateful already. Thank you for being there for me and for not giving up on me no matter how hard headed I am. ❤️

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February 10, 2017 

The supposedly food date at The Yard at Xavierville’s switched on to yet, another memorable movie and Bingsu date at Ayala. I don’t know why but everytime I get to spend time with Cjay is definitely the BESTEST moments of my entire life. Parang bawat day napakamemorable and I just can’t get enough of it. Call me a selfish clingy brat pero kapag nakasama ko na sya, ayokong natatapos ung araw kasi everytime na we have to depart ways, namimiss ko sya agad. Gusto kong makulong sa mga yakap nya, matadtad ng masasarap nyang halik at yung presensya nyang nakakapag pagaan ng loob ko. 

Cjay and I aren’t like the usual couple who could get to see each other everyday. We could only see each other once a week. Sad diba? But the amazing part of it na kahit bihira lang kami magkita, pero the moment na makita ko na sya nag aautomatic yung mga ngiti namin sa labi.. sobrang big relief. Everything feels like the first time, sa sobrang excited ko makita sya andon padin ung kaba na nararamdaman ko tulad nung first meet up namin nung Hydro. Ganon na ganon padin! Yung namemesmerize ako sa itsura nya and completely have no idea what’s gunna happen next. Yung galaw nya na hindi mo ineexpect, mga possible stories nya na matatawa, mabbwisit, mapapaisip at maaamaze ka because all I could ever do is listen and think na “Ang swerte swerte ko talaga sa lalaking to.” Hinding hindi nakakasawa because everyday is completely different. Kahit na nagiging routine namin ang magchat lang ng magchat, we never run out of stories to tell. Hindi lang basta na chat na makakapag update lang, pero feeling ko kasama ko padin sya dahil sa dami ng kwento namin sa isa’t isa.

Isa nanaman itong araw na memorable and favorite ko. For the past days, napapadalas ung away namin and it’s getting out of hand. Mahirap din ung magkalayo tapos magkaaway, kahit anong gawin suyo and lambing, it won’t work. But I’m happy na we get to make bawi after those days. Iba talaga kapag kasama mo na ung taong mahal mo, lahat ng negativity na nasa isip ko, bigla bigla ko nalang nalilimutan and all I could ever do is focus and appreciate na nasa harap ko na sya. Hay grabe :(

Date and Duty, all in one day hehe i won’t forget this day :) 

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Hi Love

🖕🏻😘🖕🏻😘🖕🏻😘

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february 08, 2017

It’s been days, had a little chill for an hour yet here we go again. Cjay and I had some little understandings yet we had to distress ourselves by uplifting our prides above our heads. But even though, we never fail to talk. Still, if we do, we tend to say each other hurtful words especially him that sometimes I had to give up and set him out the conversation. 

Everytime we fought I’d ask myself, “Mali bang magpakatotoo ako sa mga bagay na ginagawa ko?” “Tanggap nya ba talaga ako?” “Bakit sa tuwing mag aaway kami, dinidiin nya pa ito para pagdusahan ko?” I wasn’t aware of the simple things I did, but unfortunately it has a big impact to him. Maybe I was too blind to see things clearly. The fact na mahal na mahal nya ako ng sobra, lahat papakealaman nya because I know for sure, he wanted what’s best and right for our relationship.

One big deal, yet small enough for me to start a fight with was my absolute fangirling feels. I actually don’t find it as one of the aspects why couples fight. But I don’t get the point that we have to fight for hours just because of a mere misunderstanding towards it. Kapag sinabi nyang, hindi. Seriously, hindi talaga and there’s nothing more I could do to change his mind. So I told myself, “Kailangan kong mag adjust para sa mga bagay na ayaw nya.” That even though, changing myself for settlement is the hardest thing for me to do. I was used to be alone, no one dictates me during my past relationships and never did I experienced what it really feels like to have a boyfriend. That’s why I’m always curious of how relationships work.

Even though I told him that I won’t ever do the same things he didn’t liked, sometimes I tend to break it unaware that I’ve already done something AGAIN. It wasn’t my mad intention, yet I know another world war has set to begin. But the only thing I knew then was that I regret it and I am willing to change my ways, to prove him na kaya ko magbago, na para maging maayos kami ulit. But unfortunately, I lost his trust. I already did. Before.

It’s really hard to please him. May it be my fault or not, he never lowers himself first. 

Just when I thought everything turns back to normal, I never thought being honest with him would fuck everything up once again. I told him everything, the worst experience rather, during the time when I’m so inlove with my ex boyfriend. I told him on how my ex manipulated me and how wrecked I am for the love and pain I had to endure. His reaction was expected yet he had once again pointed out how wrong I am to stay. I don’t know why I had to apologize for the mistakes I had which turns out one of the biggest lessons I’ve learned in my life. It’s all in the past, why wouldn’t he understand that?

Truth be told, Cjay and I had a contrast relationship experience. He had the best and happy ones, yet I had the worst and unfortunate ones. I had lots of failed relationships before. But those failures had told me different lessons to realize. I maybe stupid for repeating some things, but I am not insensitive. Tao lang naman ako, nagkakamali. Maybe he’s just too perfect, he wanted to have a perfect relationship, to have a perfect girl.. Pero hindi ako ganon at hindi ko maipapangako na magiging perpekto ang relasyong pinasok naming dalawa.

But still here I am trying to adjust kasi mahal na mahal ko sya. I would always cry and no matter how ill I felt, no matter how unsure everything could turn out, I would still choose to tell him I’m sorry.

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B A S I C

(づ｡◕‿‿◕｡)づ ✧ Name: Lykha Sabalones Omila ✧ Birthday: 05 22 1995 ✧ Zodiac: Gemini ✧ Nationality: Filipino ✧ Currently at: PH ✧ Motto: “Smile, it makes people wonder what you are thinking.”

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February 06, 2017

I’m back! It’s really a shame for me to admit this but I lost my second main tumblr account and the only main account that has left is my kpop-spazzing account. I just couldn’t give up this remaining main account for my personal purposes, but luckily I never knew that tumblr has new set of features like you could make two or more blogs within your main account. So basically, this is my second blog from my main one which is: @aesehoo. 

I’ve been so busy about making my life better and happier for the past years that I wasn’t able to blog within those. But my little fingers have been itching to write about a lot of things. So here I am! There have been ups and downs with my life and I’ve been experiencing terrible mood swings. But rest assured, most of the time I’d definitely blog about rants and love.

This blog contains my daily life progress and thoughts.  

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Oh lawd! So love them!